A/N: I think that day off may have been good for the story. At the same time, I feel bad for not living up to my usual standards. That chapter sucked. I apologize, but I'm not quite sure if the humor is back up and running just yet.

Just like I have no idea what a Punjabi is, I have no clue as to what a Hornswoggle is. What is that? Don't even tell me that it's his name, because I've never heard of such ridiculous wordage, not even in the strangest culture in the world. Hornswoggle is not a name for a human. Actually, I don't even think that Hornswoggle is human at all. I'm pretty sure that leprechauns aren't classified as human beings.

I have the answer for Triple H's question. It is pretty obvious that Hornswoggle's mom was not magically delicious. If she was, she would not have shot that out of her stomach. That is so ugly. She must have been deformed herself. The thought of Vince McMahon having sex with a magical creature is just disturbing. He probably thought that her magical powers would somehow get him money. Yeah, Vince, real smart.

Even if he is not a real human, he should at least have the common decency to practice routine personal hygiene. What could he possibly be doing where his face is always that dirty? Is he helping Santa Claus go up and down the chimneys? I thought Hornswoggle was a leprechaun, not an elf. Hell, that kid is so strange, maybe he's both.

Another thing that baffles me about Hornswoggle is his terrible facial hair. The jerk is blonde, but his nasty ass beard is jet black. I'm pretty sure that his stupid green hat can't protect his hair from all the soot in the chimneys, so what is that kid really doing? I'm not sure I want to know.

Remember when DX showed the horrid pictures of Randy Orton? Triple H said something about a picture of Orton and a midget with jelly beans. Yep, that was Hornswoggle. How do I know? Orton disclosed that information to me after that little segment. I then proceeded to wash out my ears after I heard that nonsense. Disgusting. At one point after that lovely conversation, I was considering cutting off my ears so I would never have to hear anything as disturbing again. I then realized that I would look like Mick Foley, the world's biggest idiot. No, thanks.

I must praise Hornswoggle for one thing, however, and that is how he won the Cruiserweight Championship. He totally snuck in the ring, hid out until he saw an opening, and then kicked ass. I think he was studying old tapes of the Edgemeister, which is very smart. However, I am not saying that Hornswoggle is good or smart by any means. No one is as good or smart as I am.

I almost, almost, feel bad for Vince that Hornswoggle is his kid. If Hornswoggle was my kid, I think I'd have to shoot myself. But I'll never have to worry about something like that happening. I mean, look at me. I would never spawn something that horrendous looking.

What the hell is a Tadpole Splash? Yes, I understand that it's the "smaller" version of the Frog Splash, but what the fuck? There is no way possible that Hornswoggle's finisher could cause as much damage as Eddie could when he pulled off the Frog Splash. Jamie Noble should go and hide in a hole for the rest of his life and stay there so the local Canadians don't chase after him with burning pitchforks. Of course, you're wondering why we would do that. First, let me tell you, that as with Triple H, I would be leading that amazing mob, video taping the whole thing to post on my live blog. But, alas, I do not have a live blog because I refuse to dwell into the loser depths that you ass monkeys are in. At least I have a life, unlike you ass clowns. Anyways, this is why Jamie Noble should go and live in a hole: Because Hornswoggle pinned him with the Tadpole Splash.

At least we know that Hornswoggle isn't the worst Superstar in the back. Congratulations, Jamie Noble. You've just been beaten by a leprechaun.

A/N: Eh…

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