Chapter 1

It's been 2 years since Julia died and it's the same routine but different day. I sighed and ran my hand through my hair, a habit on which I got from my deceased step mother. I Look down at my fragile younger brother asleep on the couch ,his light innocent snores filling the air around him bring a sad smile to my face. Totally oblivious to the world around him and naive of the harsh life he is living.

Off-course I don't want him to live such a life as I have and that is why I do what I do. I want to protect him from what no one protected me from. I want to give him the love I was never given and show him right from wrong. Teach him how to brush his teeth and how to say his ABC, all the things I had to learn without a guardian.

My little brother Aden is 2 years old with green eyes and curly blonde hair. Julia died giving birth to him. I would never blame him for her death because he was all she ever wanted .The way she smiled when looking down at her swollen belly was beautiful and loving, the exact look you would expect from a mother. Sure she looked at me with love and care but there was always something missing. You just can't replace a child which is genetically yours. You see Julia wasn't my real mother but for the 2 yr s she was with us, she showed me more love and care then I ever thought was possible. I don't know who my real mother is or what happened to her.

I've lived with my father all my life but I wouldn't call him my father, he has never been a real father to me .I only wish that I had, had someone so happy about buying me cute clothes and someone who spent hours on end trying to make sure everything was perfect when I was born. There were so many times I would catch her staring of into the distance with a soft ,caring smile gracing her face, with both hands on her stomach just enjoying his presence.

I would catch her talking to him whenever she thought no one was looking. She would stay up singing him lullaby's and talking about his future .Telling him he better not bring any girls home to early or even boys depending on his preference .It doesn't matter to her she will love him all the same. Whenever I asked her how she was she would break into a smile and say she is fine, the sickness is worth it as long as he is healthy. The long and lengthy discussions I listened to just to please her was her just cooing all about her lovely little boy. How she knew he was going to be a boy was beyond me, but she was right and he is everything she ever wanted and spoke about.

Its sad how she only got to meet him once and he will never get to meet her. Yet in that split moment she sore him ,in that split moment...I sore everything , all the love and emotions you could imagine, It was like watching a movie full of someone else s dreams ,to say I was stunned would be a understatement. That was surly not natural of me. Julia died with a smile on her face after breathing her last words of " her beautiful baby boy" before falling into her eternal sleep.

After her death my father turned back to his old self not wanting to even look at his new son saying he was a killer and looked too much like his dead wife that it was disgusting, disgraceful even. Thus making me his guardian .I had made a promise to look after Aden months before he was born and I wasn't going to break it. I never thought the promise would entail this much but it was a promise nun the less.

He reminded me so much of her. Julia also had lovely dirty blonde curls and beautiful green eyes that seemed to just reach out and grab you, those eyes will probably be what I miss most and the comfort they shared. Sometimes she confused me with those eyes sending me knowing looks like she knew something I didn't but I never found out what.

I met Julia who I later called mum when I was 11. It was back when me and the old man were living in Australia, my birth place. Well I assume it's my birthplace, I've never seen my birth certificate but I'm pretty sure that's where I'm from. Sir, which is what I call my father, bought her home one night after being gone 3 days without a word. She was all smiles and laughter. I'd never seen someone look so happy .As soon as she spotted me cleaning the floors, the first thing she did was smile even brighter and the second thing she did shocked me. She got on her hands and knees introduced herself and started scrubbing with me. Sir seemed to be a bit shocked at this reaction as well as he tried to per sway her to sit down and relax, that I had it all under control. Yet she just kept insisting she was fine and cleaning is more fun when you're not doing it on your own.

From that day on she came over more often and sir seemed a lot happier and more merciful especially when she was around .He stopped hitting me as often and in less obvious places not wanting her to find out his dangerous tendencies. I was worried he was going to do to her what he did to me but he never did. He showed her the love I wish I got and the care I was never given. In some ways I guess I resented her for getting what I always wanted but never thought about it too much seeing as she was the only person to ever show me a real constant concern.

After being together for 6 months they both decided to move to America, sir's home country. I had no say in the matter but was brought along like the rest of the furniture with no complaints in fear of a beating. Sadly leaving the few other children I associated with heading towards a big scary place I new nothing about.

I didn't have many possessions just the necessities like clothing, a pair of shoes and the one thing I treasured with my life, my guitar. The precious memory of which receiving I will always hold dear. I was given the guitar when I was 5 and proceeded to hide it from my father ever since .I managed to hide it in Julia's cupboard in the hope of getting to it first when we arrived and finding a new place for it. I have a feeling she might have secretly known about it considering the many times she looked the other way or distracted sir with unnecessary things giving me my escape, but she never mentioned it. I think I only got away with it for so long before the help of Julia was because Sir's interest in me was next to nothing .The only time he would associate me as his daughter was for the pretense of my school not finding out and getting him in trouble with the government, which would surly cause him some amount of jail time.

The first 6 months in this country were hard for me to adjust to. The new schooling system being one. The unwanted attention from my classmates, because of my accent another. Not just school but getting use to having a female figure in the house and letting someone care for me. They were all new experiences. Sir still kept me in line and never held back on the harsh comments when Julia wasn't around. But for the 2 years she was with us I had my first real birthday, celebrated my first Christmas and learned that there is such thing as love. I also learn t that good things always come to an end.

The end of birthday/ Christmas beatings from sir making me immobile for a few days. Having to fake sick so no one would suspect anything. Holding Back the longed for tears. It was hard...It still is. Sir always beat me when Julia ever bought me something or he thought she showed me too much care. Bringing me back to the reality of my life and what I really was..nothing. Even though her kind gestures brought me physical pain I have never regretted the time we spent together and will never forget it.

Honestly even though sir beat me real bad on these occasions just the fact I didn't have to worry about his grim ways when her presence was near was also something I longed for again. Now that she is gone, that certainly isn't the case. The saddest thing that came to an end though was her life. I was never informed of her fragile health in the last months of her pregnancy, I didn't notice any change in her behavior and I think that is the way she wanted it. That was the only time I remember ever crying for someone else.

A sudden a gargling noise brought me back to the present. Looking to the noise I spotted Aden dribbling and making sucking noises on the couch still deep in his dreamland. I cracked a smile when he blew a bubble with his saliva. I must have been standing here a while lost in my own thoughts. I shook my head. Right bed I thought to myself.

I quietly picked him up of the couch and brought him upstairs into our room laying him down in his crib. He quickly snuggled into his favorite blanket and pulled his Mr. Teddy tight or Mr. T as I like to call him. Seconds later I could hear his light snores again giving me the okay to go back downstairs.

Looking around our small house it was filthy and the furniture was really old. The only decent things in the house were Aden's and that's because Julia pre brought them all before he was born. I spotted the broom in the corner of the room and decided I should give a quick clean before Sir stumbled home drunk ,most likely screaming abuse at me for making a mess. I snorted, ye a mess of bear bottles, porn mags, cigarette buds and take out. Off-course it's my mess...it always is.

After taking out the trash and recycling enough bottles to save the world I decided to call it a night. I had school tomorrow and have to get up extra early to get Aden ready for day-care. I trudged my way up the stairs and ninja'd my way into the room to grab my pajamas and bathroom key of the end of my bed without waking the little bro. I skilfully passed my mission and found myself under the warm spray of my shower head which I believe has its own magical orchestra going on inside. Definitely full of tone death fairies with no sense of rhythm. The warmth of the water relaxed my tensed muscles and in these few minutes of solitude, I escape the world around me and just focus on the warmth enveloping me.

Tonight my shower is short lived as I hear banging and cussing downstairs. Sir is home. I quickly jump out the shower and don't even bother drying as I fling my huge T-shirt on and baggy sweat pants. I quickly grab the key of the side and the rest of my things knowing I won't be able to brush my teeth tonight.

I lock the bathroom door before quietly making my way back into my room. I put my things away and start to hop into bed only hoping that the loathsome man will leave me alone tonight. The springs of my old mattress creak making me freeze. I feel my stomach drop. I can hear my heart beat quicken. My hands make fists in my shirt as fear roles over me. Please don't hear; please don't hear. I chant in my head. Thankfully my prayers were answered and I hear him settle down probably passed out on the couch. I release a shaky breath I didn't realize I was holding before lightly lowering myself down onto the bed. Leaving me just one monster to fight tonight, my dreams.


A/N-So this is my first chapter after the prologue. I was hoping to let everyone in on the basic insight of her past and off-course there are some finer details I left out. But in due time they will come. I was going to wait till Wednesday to put this up but decided to give it to you early so I can get started on my next chapter seeing as I don't have Tafe tomorrow which aka means I got plenty of time.=].

I'm pretty sure I told all of my reviewers how ridiculously excited I got over there reviews and its true, it's like candy I'm loving it ahahaha=]. Even though everyone liked my Prologue I'm happy with the story line of it but the mistakes in it irritated me to know end. For some reason there were parts in there were some sentences were meshed together and words taken out. Which is really weird considering that it was fine in my word doc and I corrected it like 50 times but it didn't work .Every time I previewed it they were there and it kind of bummed me out cause I wanted it to be perfect. I know how even one spelling mistake can bring you out of the whole story. I'd appreciate if one of use could tell me if it's just my computer or that really has happened .like one part was

- Meaning that when he was born I was are usually crucial years in a teenage girls life . Which is meant to be- Meaning that when he was born I was 14. Those are usually crucial years in a teenage girls life.

Another is- I really was just hoping that even if there was a slim chance somewhere ,that I would find these people and they listen to me, that they would be willing to help bring Aden up in a normal just hoping there not as fucked up as there sperm donor and they are kind people.- cause whoa that is one long sentence.- I really was just hoping that even if there was a slim chance somewhere I would find these people and they listen to me, that they would be willing to help bring Aden up in a normal environment. I'm just hoping there not as fucked up as there sperm donor and they are kind people.

And one other I picked up - He is my father. My only man that helped bring me into this I wanted to please him and his words stung.- He is my father. My only relative. The man that helped bring me into this world. Offcource I wanted to please him and his words stung.

Sorry I know long A/N but I wanted to clear that up just because it irked me so bad and im really hoping it doesn't happen to this chapter .I have checked it a good 5 times so if it does im sorry ill try and fix it. Also sorry to one reviewer who I might have accidentally sent a half reply to my computer decided to have a spazz and send when I wasn't finished. BUT anyway lol after my rant I would just like to say thanks again and don't hesitate to throw ideas at me if you have any and by all means ask questions then I know what I haven't covered and can make sure I do.

=3 until next time 3=P –Kaiottic-Rawr-