Hey all! I'm sorry I've been inactive. Summer apparently isn't just time to sit inside and read, who knew? Not me! Nerd life is getting harder to find time! :( but it's okay, cause I'm Back! R&R please, I take into heart anything you say.
I still don't know what to do. He just... He's so amazing. He cut his hair earlier this month but it grew back to curling around his shoulders. That beautiful black hair and those blue eyes capture me every single time. He's beautiful and dangerous and he knows it. Now at this point, I understand that I should lose him. What he did to me is unforgivable. It is but he walked up to me in the hall looked me in the eyes so pitiful and sorry
"Tess, you know how I said everything deserves a second chance?" I was at a loss for words so I just nodded in agreement. "Well, I've been thinking that what I did... I know it was wrong... and I just wanted to say... this." At that moment he leaned towards me and closed those beautiful, sad eyes. He was going to kiss me. I knew it. I knew it all along. But I didn't let him. I pulled away. And he opened his eyes that flashed with hurt and surprise. I said,
"I know nothing about you, the real you, the one you keep locked away deep in your heart. Kissing me, was not helping you in your favor. You should know that I still don't know Will. I love you but no one person on planet Earth can help my decision but you. So let me see you. And maybe sometime, the stakes will change." He looked away from me then, away down the hall and he knew my choice. He whispered,
"I can't do that Tess. I love you with all my heart, but I can't do that." So with tears in my eyes, I walked away towards the bathroom. I ran into Will's best friend. James, Jem whatever his name is. He looked at me warily like a predator does another. He looked towards Will, stomping down the hall to a classroom I knew he didn't have. Will's best friend softened his gaze slightly. His long fingertips reached under my chin and he whispered to me,
"If you ever hurt him. I will kill you. And do not take this as concern for my friend. Heed this as a warning. Because if he can't have you, you will be mine. And so will your heart. You truly are extraordinary Tessa. You have a gift for revenge. But do not use it on him. Use it on yourself or I will know." With that, he walked away whilst I stood there confused. His sentences made no sense. He likes me, but he'll kill me if I hurt Will how he hurt me. A type of revenge one might say. What a cruel boy. He might have been high, I guess I'll never know. Wish me good luck Jem. I'll be back with a master plan of my own.
Will hurt me so I will hurt him. There is no more chance of us if he refuses to acknowledge how amazing he is and just let his guard down and be himself. But I suppose that is exactly what attracted me to him in the first place. Reading, wit and the undeniable sense of broken somewhere deep down.
