Chapter 2: Icky
Xion POV
I sighed deeply as I lay awake in bed, thinking thoughts about her. She's always so rude and honestly, she's kind of a prissy bitch. . .so why couldn't I get her out of my head? I couldn't figure it out for the life of me. I sat in bed, my beloved red Vaio laptop perched on my lap, staring at the blank word document in from of me. I hummed a tune and switched to Google Chrome, typing 'Oxi-N' into the search bar and pressing enter. Seconds later, I was rewarded with 'About 11,980,000 results', the foremost being a link to a blog entitled: Suffocated.
I clicked the link and read the most recent posts and chat messages. One caught my eye and I stopped to read it.
DeceasedDaydreamVII: I loved the new song, it made me cry so hard that my parents were wondering if I was depressed. XD
PinkLotus45: What'd you tell them?
DeceasedDaydreamVII: What they wanted to hear ;D
PinkLotus45:=_= So you are depressed?
DeceasedDaydreamVII: I used to be. But not since I started listening to Oxi-N's music three months ago. In fact, it's the reason I'm alive now. Now I was really interested.
LuvTehB33: Rly? How?
DeceasedDaydreamVII: Well, I was looking online for ways to kill myself by suffocating or choking myself without causing too much pain, but I found this blog instead. I listened to some of Oxi-N's songs, and I was touched by her story. I realized that most of my problems were actually rather small compared to some other people's problems, so I made a promise to myself to stick around and support Oxi-N in any way I can.
PinkLotus45: Wow. . .That's amazing.
LuvTehB33: Srlsy. Tht's totes cray. Glad ur still alive DD7.
I smiled and couldn't resist joining in.
Oxi-N: Me too. And geez, you make me sound like a hero :P All I did was write angsty songs and record them. You're the hero here, seeing as you saved yourself from you. You and you alone pulled yourself from that pit of depression, I'm just happy I could provide the rope. :)
DeceasedDaydreamVII: O.o Holy shit, are you really Oxi-N? I giggled a bit.
Oxi-N: Who else would I be?
PinkLotus45: No offense, but how do we know it's really you and not some jerk yanking our chains?
Oxi-N: That's a very good point. Would a picture of my tattoos help? I'll include the date. ;)
LuvTehB33: I think it's rly her! Holy crap, I totes luv ur music!1!
Oxi-N: Thank you. That makes me really happy.
PinkLotus45: You have me 85% convinced that you're really her.
Oxi-N: Then let's see about that last 15%.
I got up and rummaged around for a sharpie and a piece of cardboard, scrawling the date and a smiley face as large and legibly as I could before heading over to my 'photo corner'. It's basically just a corner of my room where I'd hung up a green screen I'd found on eBay, and set up a small fog machine and a black stool.
I turned on my fog machine (which I'd affectionately named Smokey) and camera, setting it to timer and clicking the shutter button as I passed. I settled on the stool and flashed the peace sign with one hand while holding the sign in the other. The flash blinded me briefly, leaving a dark spot in my vision and I hopped off the stool, popping out the SD card and retreating back to my warm bed.
I double checked to make sure my face was properly obscured, made some minor edits, and added a background of a brick wall with Oxi-N spray painted on it, graffiti style. Reasonably satisfied, I uploaded it onto the blog and labeled it: For LuvTehB33, PinkLotus45, and DeceasedDaydreamVII.
Oxi-N: So, Lotus, how's that 15% now?
PinkLotus45: I'm sorry for doubting you. TT3TT Please forgive me!
LuvTehB33: U shud be! ;P
Oxi-N: I guess I could forgive you, since you asked so nicely X3.
PinkLotus45: Thank you!
DeceasedDaydreamVII:. . .I can't believe that Oxi-N is legit chatting with me right now! XD I'm sorry, I'm geeking out right now. You're, like, my favorite person in the world!
Oxi-N: D'awww stop, you're making me blush. Thanks for your continued support guys, it means a lot to me. :)
LuvTehB33:Np. Ur my fav music artist! R u evr gonna do a concert? I'd luv to see u in person. Q^Q Pleesh? I grinned.
Oxi-N: Sorry, B33, not happening. I have my reasons for not showing my face. So if you see me in Wal-Mart, keep it on the down low, kay? ;) Then another person joined.
WhiteWitch16: OMG. I saw a tweet that Oxi-N is online right now, is it true? I laughed.
Oxi-N: Nah, complete rumor ;)
DeceasedDaydreamVII: Total bullshit.
PinkLotus45: Absolute bollock.
LuvTehB33: hells yea she's here!
Oxi-N: Thanks for outing me, B33, I think we had WhiteWitch fooled! You're the one that tweeted it aren't you? :) You sneaky devil you. :D
LuvTehB33: Hehe Gilty as chargd
WhiteWitch16: Oh wow, oh WOW. This is such an honor! I honestly love your music!
Oxi-N: Thank you. :)
WhiteWitch16: XD I still can't believe I'm talking to the real Oxi-N! This is honestly my biggest dream come true! (Besides marrying you that is ;3)
DeceasedDaydreamVII: Whoa now, WhiteWitch. Slow down there, if anyone's going to marry Oxi-N, it'll be me. ;D
PinkLotus45: Now now, let's not fight, I'm sure there's enough Oxi-N to go around.
Oxi-N: Does that mean that you also want a piece of me, Lotus?
PinkLotus45: Doesn't everyone?
Oxi-N: Aw, you guys. ^^ You're all awesome.
DeceasedDaydreamVII: *sigh* Now I have to go change my pants, dammit, don't say stuff like that, I have to leave for school soon! I glanced at the time. 6:45 am.
Oxi-N: Ugh, don't remind me. I don't want to go today,
LuvTehB33: IKR? I cn't stand skool. Some ppl there are jst stupid.
WhiteWitch16: Why do you need to change your pants?
DeceasedDaydreamVII:. . .It's not funny when you have to explain it.
Oxi-N: Alright guys, I gotta get dressed, see ya!
DeceasedDaydreamVII: Oh how I wish I was there to see that. . .okay, until next time. ;)
WhiteWitch16: Um, bye guys.
PinkLotus45: Good bye to the both of you. :)
LuvTehB33: Cya.
I logged out and hopped out of bed, sliding on my black jeans from yesterday with a fresh T-shirt and my leather jacket. I hurried to the bathroom to finish getting ready to start the day.
Kairi was humming and speed-walking along, while I trailed along behind her, trying to sort out some lyrics in my head and pin the melody down so that I could begin working on a new song.
Bequeath to me thy royal soul
Burn like flames that flicker bold
This fire alit with my desire
Thoughts of you cut through the mire
In brightest days and nights unknown
I'll not leave you here alone
I'll not leave you here alone
I nodded, semi-satisfied with how it was coming along so far, and started to focus on the bassline. I imagined something like a mix of the basslines from Papercut by Linkin Park and Pick Up The Phone by Falling in Reverse. I made the sounds under my breath, moving my fingers against an invisible fretboard and strumming invisible strings.
"Kairi!" She flinched and started walking faster. I looked over my shoulder and scowled. It was Xehanhort, the creepy old mayor that had just been elected last month. "Kairi Nakamura!" She hunched her shoulders and ignored him, walking faster still.
When we were out of sight, I jogged until I caught up with her.
"Kai? What's wrong?" She was deathly pale and shaking like a leaf. I touched her arm, but she shook me off and kept going. "Kairi!" She stopped and turned toward me. "What's wrong?" But before she could answer, onto the scene came an incredible dunce.
"Kairi! Hey!" I gritted my teeth as Naminé bounded up and hugged her. Kairi smiled and hugged her back.
"Morning." I could feel the opportunity slipping away. I growled in frustration.
"Never mind." I saw Naminé sneaking glances at me and trying to pretend she wasn't, but I wasn't in the mood to mess with her today. I tuned them out and went back to working on the song in my head.
To me bestow thy royal heart
And you and I will never part
I'll be your knight and loyal friend
Don't crush my heart, don't make this end
Do I sound desperate? Well, hell I am.
Am I to be killed, an innocent lamb?
"-literally had a conversation with her!" My head snapped up as I tuned into their conversation. Kairi gaped at her.
"No way." Naminé nodded enthusiastically.
"Yes way! Apparently she actually responded when someone mentioned her in the chat!" Kairi whistled, grinning and shaking her head wistfully.
"Song downloads and site traffic are gonna go way up for a while. Either she's a real friendly person, or an evil genius." I discreetly rolled my eyes.
"Does she even get paid for downloads?" I muttered just loud enough for Kairi to hear, knowing full well what the answer was. Kairi turned and smiled back at me.
"Ooh, Xion took an interest in a conversation involving Oxi-N! The world is ending!" She waved her arms around theatrically, cracking Naminé up and making me scowl. Well that was pointless. I looked back down and started to work on my lyrics, but Kairi slowed down and waited for me to catch up. "Hey, I was just kidding." I shrugged.
"Cool. Whatever." Naminé grabbed my arm and pulled me forward a few steps.
"Look, I don't know what your deal is," I looked her in the eye and she gulped, but continued. "And I don't know what you do so often that keeps you up at night, but can you please at least try to be civil to your sister? I mean, haven't you noticed how upset she's been lately?" My jaw clenched and I grabbed her uniform tie, yanking her close so that I could growl directly into her face.
"Listen, Naminé," I spat her name in a mocking tone. "Kairi is my sister. Of course I fucking noticed, what, do you think I live on a different fucking planet? Don't you ever presume to know my sister better than me!" I let her go and pushed her away, walking faster. I heard her sniffling behind me, and Kairi's quick footsteps. She wrenched me around.
"What the hell is your problem?" I gaped at her.
"What? You act like I threw a brick at your precious puppy! All I did was defend myself and suddenly I'm the fucking bad guy! Again! I'm so sick of this place, I'm sick of all of this shit, I'm sick of fucking life! You want to know what my problem is? My problem is that I get tons of bullshit, but not one damn ounce of respect!" She shook her head.
"No. Your problem is that you think that you're always right." I recoiled, but the worst was yet to come. "And you know what?" I knew what she was going to say, and I didn't want to hear it. I wanted to cover my ears and cry like a baby. "Maybe she does know me better than you. She sure as hell treats me better." Her eyes widened as she realized what she'd said. I felt the tears pouring silently down my face, but my expression could have been carved from solid granite.
"Wow, Kairi." My voice a dull monotone. "So that's how you really feel?" She shook her head. "Answer me this, who listened to your constant bitching when Sora left you for Riku? Who comforted you when you felt that you couldn't take mom and dad's deaths? Who's been the one that's tried to get you to open up and share your troubles? Was it Naminé?"
"Wait, Xion, I'm sorry! That came out all wrong!" I backed away, hiding my face behind my bangs. "Let me explain!" She pleaded.
"Stress is but the final test, for it reveals the heart." Kairi froze and stared at me as I sang softly, communicating in the only other way I knew how. "You say the things you've felt and should've said right from the start." Then I turned and trudged away. "Think carefully before you speak, lest you hurt another, that's just one more lesson that we'll never learn from mother."
"Xion!" But I began to run, and I didn't look back. I didn't even see Demyx until it was too late.
"Whoa!" He caught me and stumbled backward when I crashed straight into him. "Xion?" I sniffed and wiped away the tears.
"What?" He touched my face and gently tilted my face up to look into his green eyes. He brushed the leftover tears away.
"Don't cry," He murmured. "What's wrong?" I tried to pull away, but he held me tighter. "Come on, you can tell me." I shook my head, and resisted the urge to press my face against his chest.
"Life is wrong." He stroked my hair gently and chuckled.
"Yeah, no kidding." Then I pulled back a bit and wiped the tears away, looking up at him through my bangs.
"Thanks, Demyx, maybe you-mmph!" I grunted in surprise when his warm lips covered my own, pressing gently but insistently. I struggled a bit, then shoved him back. "What. . ." I felt my body begin to tremble. "The hell?" He held up his hands.
"Xion, wait, just hear me out. I-" I wrenched away and clenched my jaw, feeling the tears begin to flow again.
"Dammit." I whispered. Then white hot rage exploded through my body and I whirled and punched the wall. Excruciating pain exploded in my knuckles as the skin tore away from my flesh, leaving a bloody smear on the wall. I cocked my fist back for another punch, but Demyx snatched my wrist.
"Geez, Xion! Xion, stop!" I collapsed into a sobbing heap on the ground, I couldn't take this anymore.
"Dammit! Is this all I am to you people? Just some. . .fucking emotionless doll you can say and do whatever you please to? Well fuck you. FUCK YOU ALL." I stood and stumbled away to find solitude, my mangled knuckles dripping blood all over my clothes and the linoleum tiles of the floor.
The bell shrieked loudly but I didn't care. I wasn't going to class. I needed to be alone.
So, after six billion years, I finally updated. I wasn't going to even continue this story, but I couldn't just abandon it. So here you are. Hope you liked it. Between homework assignments at the moe, please forgive short AN.
