NOTE: The last couple of chapters have been kind of dark and a tad depressing, but there won't really be a change in pace for the chapters coming up as well. I'm sorry if anything put into these chapters have hit home with anyone who has read it, and everything that is written just comes from my own thought process, and in no way is meant to target anyone out on their past experiences.


Chapter 14: Old Friend

There she was. Anna looked down at her mother, alone in the dark room that was slightly illuminated by the television that displayed static on its screen, but was muted. Anna couldn't say a word, but watched her mother's body move up and down as she breathed; the slow and heavy beeping noise of the heart monitor seemed like the only thing that kept Anna in her right mind, as any kind of silence would cause her to burst into a fit. Anna sat down on the chair behind her, slumping down in her seat as she felt the weight of her mother's punishment befall her.

There's no way that I could ever make this up to her. Anna blinked away a tear, seeing Idun jerk slightly in her sleep. She'll never be the same…

Anna stood, and leaned over to kiss her mother tenderly on the forehead, allowing a tear to cascade down onto Idun's fair skin before turning around and leaving the sable-like aura of the room. She closed her mother's room door behind her, sighing as she leaned backwards on the door as it shut.

Never…


Anna walked out of the hospital doors after inquiring about the whereabouts of her sister might be to the front desk, and looked over to the rock garden that was decorated with various colors and styles of Christmas lights. As she made her way over to the garden, she saw a single figure sitting on a bench in front of a small waterfall, and upon further inspection, deduced that the tallish, blonde-haired being was Elsa. Anna shivered as the cold air whisked past her cheeks. Pulling a beanie out of her jacket pocket, she walked herself over to where Elsa was, trying to make sure that her beanie wouldn't make her hair turn into a tangled mess as she slipped it on.

Upon approaching her older sister, Anna was running through thousands of things to say to her. She didn't know whether to console her older sister, or to just hold her. Anna frowned, however, remembering how Elsa reacted when she tried to hug her before, pushing Anna away yet again.

No. Anna became determined, quickening her step towards the bench where Elsa sat. There's no way that I'm gonna let that affect me. There can't be any weakness in me, not now, not ever. I have to be there for Elsa. Anna was only just a few feet away from where Elsa sat now, and reached out an arm to let her older sister know that she was there. I have to be strong for her…

Nothing Anna could have done to mentally prepare herself would have readied her for what happened next. Elsa sprang up from where she was sitting, and forced herself into Anna's arms, weeping and crying loudly. Anna stood there, unable to move as her sister being in her arms was the last thing she had been expecting.

Comfort her, dickbrain! Anna wrapped her arms around Elsa, smelling the sweet, flower-like perfume that Elsa's clothes gave off, and stroked her hair with her right hand, petting the blonde waves of tresses that stretched down towards her single braid. Anna felt Elsa push her head deeper into her neck, and could feel her breath running down her skin, causing her spine to tingle and chillbumps to form on her arms and legs.

Immediately, thoughts of her sister sparked in Anna's brain. Thoughts of love, thoughts of touch, thoughts of lust. The very dream that Anna had days before rekindled in her head, causing Anna to almost shiver with desire as she played through the entire envious dream once more.

No! Not now! Anna closed her eyes tight. Control yourself, you sick fuck! Your parents are hurt, Elsa is hurt, YOU are hurt! Now is not the time to be thinking about getting in your sister's pants! It won't happen now, and it won't happen ever, so just STOP!

"There, there, Elsa," Anna said, forcing a smile onto her face, "it's okay."

Elsa violently shook her head, wiping her eyes onto Anna's jacket. "No, it's not! I ran out on her!" Elsa looked down, causing a single tear to fall down from her cheek and onto the ground. "I couldn't stand seeing her like that…"

Anna pulled Elsa back into her embrace, holding her even more tightly than before. "I couldn't either, Elsa. But there's nothing we can do about it now. We just have to-"

"But there was something I could have done about it," Elsa interrupted, "because I've been trained to shoot guns! I've been trained to take a life! I've been trained to save people! And where did that training go? Where did it get anybody? All it got was my mom in a hospital, and it took my dad's life!" Elsa sniffled and started to cry, when she realized what she had just said. Her eyes opened wide, and looked right at Anna, and what she saw across Anna's face wasn't Anna. Elsa had never seen it before.

Anna hadn't felt this cold in her life. Everything that kept her warm in the chilly, December air now turned to nothingness. Her heart pounded, but she couldn't feel its pulse. The world around her faded to black, and the memories of her dad replayed in her head. All the times when her dad would fix pancakes for her and Elsa as a child, putting a smiley face made out of chocolate chips and peanut butter, and every time that her dad ever called her rabbit. Every day when he would get back from work, late or not, he would still find time to play with his little rabbit.

He wouldn't be dead if it weren't for you. You had to just leave. You had to go fulfill your sick need for drugs to satisfy the fact that you'll never be in an intimate relationship with your sister, and now your dad is dead because of it. Maybe you should be dead instead…

Anna was snapped back to reality when Elsa pulled Anna into her embrace, holding her tightly as she explained how she had received a call from Fiske yesterday about the death of their father, but nothing Elsa said helped Anna succumb to the inevitable realization of the truth that was there in front of them. Their father had been killed, and there was nothing they could do about it anymore.

"I'm so sorry Anna," Elsa whimpered, putting her forehead onto her sister's, closing her eyes as they filled with tears, "I'm so sorry…"

Anna sniffed, allowing a tear to fall to the ground, hitting the ground hard enough for Anna to hear it meet the snow ridden ground. The air around them was cold, and the wind blew hard, causing the snow that fell to blow into the girl's faces and in their clothes. Anna felt nothing of the snow, the cold, or anything, though, and although she tried, she couldn't feel her sister holding her, nor the touch of their skin. Suddenly, Anna broke out into an all-out volley of wails and tears, falling to her knees and she looked down at her hands. She sat there, on her knees, letting out whimpers and sobs that struck true to Elsa's own heart, as she watched her younger sister grieve the loss of their father far worse than Elsa did. The older sister kneeled down beside her and pulled Anna in close, hugging her from the side as she released her emotions, one tear of denial at a time.


The car ride home was morose, with a dark aura covering the vehicle in the cold December air. The interior of Elsa's Altima was warm, cozy even, as she cranked the heater to full blast, keeping the cold air from making the day any worse than it already made itself out to be. Time seemed to crawl, being the only car on the service road back to their house.

Anna sniffed every now and then in the stuffy air of the car, holding back tears that would surely fall without hindrance if it weren't for Anna wanting to be strong for Elsa. Although on the outside she had been putting up a good fight of keeping her emotions contained and under control, Anna was tearing herself up like a rabid wolf would shred apart its prey. Anna knew that the cause of her father's passing was on her. Anna knew that any kind of grief that was caused was due to her. No matter what anyone said to her, she knew inside that if she hadn't had the fallacy of everyone being against her, and denying that her sister loved her, then her parents would still be alive today. And even if they weren't, then at least Anna could have done something to prevent it. She thought little and little of herself with each passing moment, knowing that Elsa is suffering because of this too. Rapunzel would suffer. Anna, the self-proclaimed sole proprietor of everyone's grief and misery, was suffering. And if anyone was to blame, then Anna couldn't find a better candidate than herself.

Elsa looked over to her younger sister, seeing that Anna was curled up into a small ball, her legs tucked into her chest under her waistline seatbelt as she was wrapped up in a blanket; her red hair falling out of her beanie as she looked out the window to her right, gazing off into the distance. Elsa couldn't stand it; she knew what Anna must have been going through with herself, and there was no way to see what Anna was feeling physically because of how resilient she was, showing no signs of emotion other than the occasional sniffle or sigh. Elsa turned her head back to the road. Say something to her. Get her mind off of things. Be the big sister.

"So Christmas is coming up," Elsa said, unsure if she would receive a response or not. "You really need to give me some ideas so I don't give you a crappy gift again, like two years ago."

Elsa watched as Anna shifted in her seat a little, and heard a small sniffle come from her little sister. "I mean, that is seriously the last time I order anything off of eBay for anyone. For some reason, that synthesizer didn't have a description saying that it was preloaded with porn noises."

Anna shifted again, but this time Elsa didn't hear a sniffle. She heard a short series of exhales from Anna's nose, indicating to Elsa that Anna was, in a way, laughing. Keep going. Make her forget, even if it's just for a little bit.

"It definitely made for an awkward family moment when everyone wanted to hear you play some Chopin, but got climax noises instead, didn't it?" Elsa said, chuckling as she talked, remembering the whole situation in detail, from the redness of their aunts faces to their uncles bursting into laughter at the noises that emitted instead of the expected tone.

Elsa looked back over from the road and saw Anna jerking slightly, looking like she was sobbing in place. Oh, great. Way to fuck it up, Els. Anna turned over, a hand covering her reddened face, a smile prominent across her lips. Elsa felt a wave of happiness flooding over her, almost forgetting what Anna's true smile looked like.

"Mom looked like a tomato," Anna said, holding back a wave of laughter, giggling at the recollection of the stroppy situation that Elsa's present had put their family in. Anna rolled back over as she continued to look out the window, giggling in place.

Elsa smiled, turning her attention back to the road, extremely pleased at Anna's happiness, knowing that she actually had helped her younger sister forget about things, even if it was just for a little bit. Looks like you can be the big sister. The last thing I'd ever want to do is see her sad, so I'm not gonna let that happen.

"Hey, Elsa?" Anna said her name quietly, sultry even, causing Elsa to deduce that the younger girl must have been either tired, or actually just wanting her to turn the heat down in the car. Either way, the way Anna said her name made Elsa smile, the almost innocent tone of her voice was mixed with sleepiness, resulting in a cute, younger sounding voice.

"Yeah, Anna?" Elsa replied, keeping her eyes on the road but failing to contain a small smile spreading across her face.

"I love you," Anna said, definitely sleepier this time. "I love you a lot."

Elsa felt her face become hot, and knowing that it would result in her blushing, she pulled her scarf up so it would be nuzzling her cheeks, keeping them out of Anna's vision, should she happen to roll over and look at her.

"I love you too, sis. More than you know," Elsa said, smiling. She looked over to her younger sister to see her rolled over, faced towards Elsa with her eyes closed and a smile on her face.

Well, I guess that solves the question if she's tired or not. Elsa looked at her sister as she slept, noticing how her cascading, red hair complimented her freckles in a way she hadn't noticed before. Anna's cheeks were a pale red, probably due to Elsa cranking the heater in the car, causing her freckles to pop out even more than usual. Nevertheless, Anna's overall look was… Cute. Elsa frowned, and looked back over to watch the road. If I was as half as cute awake as she is asleep, I'd be doing well. Elsa chuckled at her own thoughts. Hell, I'd have a boyfriend by now.


Elsa sighed as she pulled into the driveway of her house, remembering the last time that she was here, she had ran into the arms of Inspector Fiske as he held her back from approaching the crime scene on that terrible day. Elsa stopped the car, listening to the heat kick off as she pulled the key out of the ignition. Elsa sat there in silence; the only noise that she could hear was a faint buzzing sound from the light pole outside, and the short, quiet breaths of her younger sister.

I don't know if I can do this. I know where my dad got shot at in this house. I know where my mom was raped. It's all on camera. It's in my head, and how could I ever forget it?

"Are we there, yet?" Anna asked, her voice distorted by sleep, and heavy with tiredness.

Elsa grinned, unable to hold the smile back even if she wanted to, as Anna's innocent, sleepy voice was prevalent now, making her seem like she was twelve again, rather than eighteen.

"Yeah, we're here, Rabbit," Elsa said, the smile still on her face. But the smiled quickly faded as Elsa realized what she had said, and turned over to look at Anna with pleading eyes. "Oh my fucking God, Anna, I didn't mean to say that, it just slipped out and I'm so sorr-"

"Hey, it's fine," Anna said, rubbing the tiredness from her eyes. "Someone has to call me that, and honestly…" Anna leaned over and kissed her sister on the head. "I always liked it more when you did it, anyway."

Anna opened up the car door, leaving Elsa speechless in place. "I'm going to take a shower and then go to bed. You should do the same. I love you," Anna said smiling, but in a way that Elsa hadn't seen before in her life, unable to completely configure what the look was of. "I love you so much." Anna then turned around, and walked to the house.

Elsa sat there, alone in the still warm darkness of the car, watching her sister as she walked to the front door, used her house key on the lock, and went inside. As soon as the door closed behind her, Elsa brought her hands down on the steering wheel hard, cursing as she did so.

Motherfucker! You about ROYALLY fucked up! Her dad died and you call her by the nickname that HE gave her?! What kind of a sick fuck does that?

Elsa pushed her face into her hands.

I mean, seriously Elsa, be the bigger sister! You always tell yourself to be the bigger sister, but you just aren't! You can't be! You don't know how!

Elsa pushed her hands through her hair, bringing them back down to her face as she gritted her teeth.

She's emotionally destroyed over this, and you're just making this worse! You're worthless! Spineless! You should be the one who died, not your dad! There's nothing you can do to help your sister, NOTHING!

Elsa screamed, letting out a burst of emotion that had been held back for so long, as she wept and cried into her palms.

"I'm so sorry, dad… I'm so sorry, Anna…"


Anna felt the warmth of the water roll down and trickle all over her freckled body; her red hair, now darkened due to the water, fell down upon her body. The water that trundled down her skin gave her a comfortable sensation that made her drowsier than before, as she leaned up against the wall of the shower. She had already shampooed her hair and washed her body, but still she remained, looking over to the small razor she used to shave her legs. Anna looked down at her wrists, now uncovered without her wristbands, and made notice of the scars that were left there from previous years.

What else will make me feel, when everything I have is gone?

Anna reached over and took the razor, unlatching the blade from the handle.

Hello again, old friend. I had hoped to never see you like this again.