(Set to the tune of "All About That Bass" by Meghan Trainor)

All About Box Five

Because I'm all about box five, bout box five
Not elsewhere
I'm all about box five, bout box five
I won't share
I'm all about box five, bout box five
Don't you dare
I'm all about box five, bout box five
Not elsewhere

Yeah, it's pretty clear
Box 5's the place to be
I tried the other seats
I was in misery

Cuz I got that sweet spot
That all the guests chase
All the right sounds in all the right places

I see the managers
Working that ticketbooth
They try to sell it out
But they really have no clue
Box 5 is always mine, why can't I get it through?
That when I sit in that seat all the music is sublime

Yeah, Christine always told me "Don't worry about your seat"
I said "But there's no way any other place can compete"
No, I won't compromise on this one simple, small request
So if they don't want trouble, obeying me would be best

Because I'm all about box five, bout box five
Not elsewhere
I'm all about box five, bout box five
I won't share
I'm all about box five, bout box five
Don't you dare
I'm all about box five, bout box five
Not elsewhere

So I'll be coming back
Go tell the managers just where I'll be at
It's where I've always sat
I'm here to tell them that if they think they can refuse me, then they surely must be mad

Yeah, Christine always told me "Don't worry about your seat"
I said "But there's no way any other place can compete"
No, I won't compromise on this one simple, small request
So if you don't want accidents, listening to me would be best

Because I'm all about box five, bout box five
Not elsewhere