Hey everyone! Thank you for sticking with me! This new chapter, I'm not really proud of it. It was kinda hard to write. Maybe I've written myself into a corner? Well I'll keep trying anyway! Cuz every story''s gotta have an ending. At least on .
Chapter 8 – Answers.
The first thing he became aware of was that weird feeling against his head. Something was bumping against it. Then he noticed the soft bird chirping from behind the window. Giving him a peaceful feeling. That feeling increased when he felt the sunshine through his window covering his face. But when he started to focus on that warm feeling he noticed he was hot. Really hot. He threw the blanket off of him and grabbed the bumping thing from his head. Only to discover it was Timcampy trying to wake him. As he looked out of the window he noticed it was probably already about 10am. Allen didn't usually wake up this late. He just had a bit of trouble falling asleep yesterday. Oh yeah that's right. Kanda had confessed to him then left. Now what was Allen supposed to do? He figured he'd just act normal. It was probably just a joke anyway.
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"Good morning Lavi, Kanda." Lenalee said as she joined them at their table for breakfast. She went to sit next to Kanda with her meal. She had ordered two sandwiches and a cup of tea. "So.. nice weather today?" Kanda only "Hmfed" as a response, naturally.
"Yeah I hope it stays like this. I have to go on a mission today" Lavi said sulkily as he played with his spaghetti. How someone could eat such a heavy meal in the morning was beyond Lenalee. "Oh where to?" Lenalee asked him.
"The Netherlands. Holland to be exact."
"Oh that's a nice little country! Especially this time of year. There will be lots of flowers, and most above all, Tulips! Huge fields full with tulips in all kinds of colors. It makes such a beautiful sight." As Lenalee enjoyed the picture in her head, Kanda rolled his eyes at her. Lavi had started laughing that Lenalee was such a girl. Somewhere around then Allen had walked into the cafeteria. As soon as he left Jerry's counter Lenalee waved him over. Allen noticed Kanda was also there but he decided to act like everything was normal. He wasn't going to act like a girl and run away blushing. He went over to their table and greeted them. "Good morning everyone."
Lavi and Lenalee, as usual, greeted him back. However Kanda did too. Which was highly unusual. He gave a small "Mornin'" back. Lenalee failed to notice this as she started telling Allen about Lavi's mission and Tulips. Lavi had noticed though. He leaned over the table and whispered to Kanda, "what happened?"
"I told him." Came kanda's curt reply.
"You did what?!" Lavi yelled as he stood up, shocked. This drew the attention of Allen and Lenalee to him as well. Who looked just as shocked as him, but because of Lavi's outburst.
"I said I told him" Kanda tried again. Not minding the fact that said 'him' was also listening to this. Lavi looked at Allen expectantly. He kept staring at him for a bit. Then turned to Kanda again. "Yuu.. Are you sure? I mean there's no reaction from him at all. It looks like he doesn't even know what we're talking about." He said.
"I said I told him I am in love with him." Kanda said, now very irritated, A small gasp escaped Allen's lips. "And don't call me that goddamnit." All four of them were quiet. Kanda looking irritated, Lavi Looking between Allen and Kanda unbelievingly, Allen, a very prominent blush adorning his cheeks and Lenalee trying to put two and two together. Then something clicked. Lavi told her Kanda had a crush on Allen. "Ohh! This is great! Kanda I'm so glad for you" She said as she put a hand on his shoulder. "I can't believe the two of you are couple" Lenalee said, you could almost see the little hearts rising from her head.
"Wait. What? We're not a couple." Kanda said, frowning. Allen looked at him. Kanda was denying it so strongly. Perhaps it really had been a joke? For some reason Allen felt a bit of pain in his chest. He did not know what to do. This had all come so abrupt. He and Kanda hadn't even had the time to talk about it properly yet.
Kanda noticed Allen looked a bit.. off.. and began; "for the last time, I said I told him. He has not given me an answer as of yet, and I won't pressure him. And neither will you." Saying directly to Lavi and Lenalee, those meddlesome kids. When he looked at the boy again he saw he was blushing like mad. He decided he had had enough to eat and left the cafeteria, heading for the training ground. As soon as he walked away he could hear Lenalee and Lavi overload Allen with questions.
"And? Do you know what you're going to say to him?" Lavi asked, evil grin on his face.
"Of course he's going to say yes!" Lenalee said, Being a girl she just couldn't help but be overjoyed about this newfound 'relationship'. Allen wasn't able to look either of them in the eyes. He wasn't sure what he thought of Lenalee's comment. Why would she say 'of course'? Did he look like he liked Kanda? He hasn't treated him in any special way. Furthermore they're always in some kind of argument. Not exactly 'lovey-dovey'. Lavi saw the look Allen was making. He wasn't too sure really. Allen looked really troubled. Soon enough Lenalee caught on as well.
"You are going to accept aren't you..?" Lenalee asked, suddenly doubting it.
"I.. I don't know.."
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"Kanda, can I talk to you for a minute?" Allen said as he had entered the training room. After Allen had left the cafeteria. He intended to go back to his room, and well.. just think about this whole thing. But somewhere half through he realized something. Yes he could just go to his room to think and think and think.. Or he could just face Kanda and talk. Tell him, how he felt.
"This better be good moyashi. Interrupting my training, you have a death wish or something?" Kanda said as he stood still in his pose. This shocked Allen a bit. Why did Kanda go back to being a jerk? Was it all a joke after all? Damn how that man could play with someone's feelings. Allen was mad. "Geez never mind! God how stupid of me to take you serious! You're such a jerk Kanda! No. No I'm an idiot. To think that..-" Allen couldn't finish his sentence. He gave one final mad look at Kanda then turned around to leave. Then Kanda grabbed his wrist.
"Wait moyashi. I'm sorry." Kanda said as he looked away from Allen with an awkward face. "It's just that ..Well I thought about everything I said yesterday, and although it's all true, it's still very embarrassing. And I know that I put you in a very awkward position, and you must be disgusted that a guy feels this way about you. But I can't help it! So I thought if I should just act like normal around you and pretend nothing happened then maybe it'd be better." Kanda looked a bit sad now.
"Kanda.." Allen had never heard Kanda ramble before, but he had just done it. "I'm sorry it's just that I'm a bit insecure as well. I mean it's not that I don't believe you, it's just.. It's really hard to.." Allen looked Kanda in the eye. "Kanda I think I believe you. I mean thinking about it. there really is no way you'd embarrass yourself like this for no reason." Allen giggled a bit, more out of embarrassment really ."But I always thought that you hated me. You call me weak. You don't want to touch me becuase I'm cursed, and well.."Kanda stopped him by grabbing his hand and holding to his chest. "Stop moyashi, I don't feel that way. I was just being.. me. Kanda looked down, a bit ashamed. "I think it's time for me to tell you my answer." Allen told him with a slight smile on his face.
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"I guess I first want to say that I'm actually very happy about your feelings." Allen began. They decided they should talk in a more private area. So they had gone to Allen's room. He took a deep breath and continued; "But I'm scared of them as well. I'm not sure what to do." Allen sighed.
"I'm not in love with you." Allen said, very seriously. "The only person I ever loved from the bottom of my heart was Mana, but that was as a father. It came naturally. But the love you speak of, I don't know how to.. But I do care for you. And.. I was thinking that maybe we could start slowly, as friends? And that you will show me, your way of loving."
"show you?" Kanda said flabbergasted. He really didn't know what to make up out of all this. He didn't know if he should be excited or disappointed. He was glad that Allen didn't reject him completely. And he didn't expect anything from the boy. But he couldn't help being a bit disappointed that the boy didn't just scream 'I love you!' and jumped into his arms. Ugh those stupid hopes of the heart..
"yes, well maybe I said it wrong. Just please be as kind to me in the future as you've been to me these past couple of days? I really like you this way. Not that I disliked you before, but you were just so.. well insufferable really.."
"Well I guess I could do that.. "
"Thank you Kanda" Allen said. His face expressing joy. "Che, whatever." Kanda tried to get back into character. He stood up and headed for the door. He walked out of the room but just before he closed the door behind him. He looked down and said a soft " 'night" before he closed the door and left.
Allen was left behind on his bed. Just staring, thinking. He had finally made a truce with Kanda. And not only that, they were friends now! Allen couldn't be happier. Though he thought it was sad that he had to reject Kanda. Well not completely reject.. He said he was open for it, but didn't feel that way about Kanda yet. 'yet'? Now Allen confused himself. He should listen to his own words. Start out as friends. The rest will come naturally.
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Well that's it. I hope you enjoyed. Sorry for that little bit of nationalism, I had to put it in. uhmm anything else.. nope. Thank you for reviewing, following and favoring! Please keep doing so!
Byebye till next time!
