Hey everyone! Well It's a short chapter this time. I'll work hard on the next one!

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Chapter 9 – The nightmares of life.

Two days had passed since the two most hot-headed exorcists in the order had talked about being friends. They hadn't talked to each other much since then, Since Kanda had left for a mission yesterday morning.

Lavi and Allen found themselves in the library. Lavi had to do some research and Allen just accompanied him, not having anything else to do.

"Would you please stop staring at me?" Allen said, not looking up from his book. He had been reading this book about Roman history when he noticed he was being watched. He just had this feeling that made the hairs in his neck stand up. He noticed Lavi hadn't moved for a while so he probably was the cause of this feeling.

"But moyashi! Why won't you tell me what happened with Kanda?" Lavi whined. He had been harassing Allen with that for a while now. But every time Allen answered with a simple 'nothing much' or 'same as always'. But Lavi wouldn't be satisfied with that. He was a bookman for crying out loud! He had to know the details. And wouldn't settle for anything less.

"It's not really any of your business now is it, Lavi?" Allen said, now looking up from his book.

"But Allen..! I can't focus on my research here! Come on~ I'm dying of curiosity here! Are you a couple or not?!" Lavi pleaded. He was hanging over the table they were sitting at. He tried to give his best puppy eyes-look.

Sigh.. "Fine. No, we're not a couple. There." Allen said, attempting to get back at reading.

"There's no way I'd be satisfied with that! Come on, moyashi."

Another sigh.. "What's there to say. I'm not in love with him. He kind of made it hard for me to even tolerate him. But for some reason I do like him and he is just as precious to me as any of you here are."

"So you rejected him? How did he react?" Lavi asked, He felt a bit sorry for his friends heart being broken.

"I.. I didn't exactly reject him.. I told him that I didn't feel that way for him. And that we should start out as friends and that maybe it could bloom into something ..more."

"Wow Allen.." Lavi said. Then he hesitantly started "..I don't want to uhm you know, interfere or anything. But you were serious right? When you said that it might be possible in the future. I mean you're not giving him false hope right?

Allen was silent for a bit as if contemplating something. He was shocked at Lavi's remark. Had he given Kanda false hope? He told him he wasn't in love with him. But had said that it might change.. But what if in the end he'd never fall for Kanda that way? What would happen to Kanda? Then suddenly Allen smiled. Shocking Lavi.

"Don't worry, it'll work out. Kanda and I will work it out. We're going to start slowly, as friends, and see how it'll go. And Kanda will understand either way." Allen said confidently and he returned to reading his book once more. Lavi was at a loss of words. But he shrugged it off. Allen would never intentionally hurt Kanda and Kanda's heart wasn't made out of glass either.

It was quiet for a moment. The topic vanished from Allen's thoughts as he read how Caesar ascended the throne. He got to this very interesting part when Lavi once again began,

"so.. Are you, you know, into guys?" Lavi asked. Allen stopped and looked up at Lavi, surprised. "what?" Allen asked hesitantly. "Well as far as I can tell, your neither disgusted nor surprised about the fact that Kanda is apparently gay. Also you're considering having a relationship with him, a male. So are you gay?"

"Well ..no I'm not.." Allen answered. "I mean I never really thought about it.. But I guess that if I would love someone I wouldn't really care about their gender. But I wouldn't know until it happens."

"Hmmm~ Interesting.." Lavi smiled to himself.

YSYSYSYSYSYSYS

"Kanda take the one to the right, Lavi you the left one! I'll take care of this one!" Allen yelled at his comrades as they fought of the Akuma. The Akuma were trying to destroy the village while searching for the innocence. Allen was fighting two level two Akuma. It wasn't a tough battle, he had long surpassed that level. Allen was finished fighting his battle and looked around, searching for Kanda and Lavi. He could help them out if necessary. When he spotted them he was surprised to find them already standing with Lenalee and the village children she was protecting. He decided to join them.

"Hey guys! Wait fo-" An extreme pain coursed through Allen as the sharp blade of a level three went through his abdomen.. He looked down at the blade, not believing it was there. With every drop of blood that fell Allen became more lightheaded. He looked behind him, seeing the cause. A Level three. It had popped out of nowhere. He looked at his friends. But they made no move to help him.

"Help ..me!" Allen yelled at them. But his friends turned away. Allen couldn't believe it. His friends weren't helping him. Why? Tears welled up In Allen's eyes, not sure if they were from the pain or the loss of companionship.

"It was bound to happen sooner or later" A voice said from behind Allen. "Come on Allen, this can't come as a surprise. You thought these people were any different? No one will ever stay by your side. You're destined to live your life alone and abandoned." The voice said.

Suddenly a strange sound came forth. Allen struggled to look up and see where it came from. He saw the cause of the sound, was a ball bouncing by. It was followed by child's laughter. The boy caught his ball just in front of Allen. He looked up seemingly innocent. When Allen tried to smile to him, which was hard seeing as was dying from the pain, the boy's face suddenly turned sour. "Freak!" he yelled and ran away with his ball.

"Freak. It's true you know? You are a freak. You got cursed, but truthfully you were cursed from the beginning. Cursed to live a lonely life. Everyone around you will either die on you, or simply abandon you. Just then the image of a small boy came forth.

"No!No!No! Stop this!" Allen screamed. He didn't want to see this. He didn't want this walk through memory-lane. He saw the small boy with the chestnut-colored hair leaning over a creature. Silent tears falling from his eyes. Trying to hide them.

"No!" Allen sniffed.

"Ahh sad isn't it. The loss of your first friend.. of course it wasn't the last. Mana followed soon after, and then came cross and oh! I forgot about you parents! Of course you don't remember them-"

"stop it"

"- But then again who would want to have a child like you? It's no wonder really that they abandoned you. –"

"stop it"

"Mhh what was that boy? What can't handle the truth? Why not? Does it hurt too much? Well get used to it. cause it will happen again. And again and again. You will lose family, friends ..and lovers.

"Stop it!"

"Embrace it boy! There is no one on your side! Except-"

"Stop it!" Allen screamed.

"-me".

::

"AAAAAAHHHHH!"

Allen woke up screaming his lungs out. He was panting as he tried to calm down. He was sweating a lot and his bed was all wet too. Making the decision for him to get out of it easy. He looked to his right. Thank god. Kanda wasn't in his bed. Well judging by the sun, it had been morning for a while. He was probably already making his day useful by searching for the innocence. Allen walked over to the window, to get some fresh air. After cooling down a bit he decided to take a shower and to then join Kanda in his search.

While under the shower, Allen thought about his dream. It hadn't been the first one for him. He's had bad dreams for as long as he could remember. Surely not every day, but often enough to not make a big deal out of them anymore. This dream seemed strangely real though. And hurt quite a bit.

Deciding to not dwell on it further, Allen dressed himself and went off to find Kanda.

YSYSYSYSYSYS

Well that's it. hope you enjoyed!

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