Hey there!
I really enjoyed writing this chapter, but I wouldn't have been able to post it today without the efficient help of my wonderful Lynn Minoha. I wanted to post it today because I'm going to be out of town for a few days and she made it possible, so you know. ^^
I hope you enjoy the continuation!
"Yes, I think he went there… No, let me check it before we send anyone looking for him, he's still very confused, I think it would be worse if he feels like he's being pursued… Yeah, I know, I hope it too… Okay, I'll let you know as soon as I arrive there, Chin. Try to hold Kono for a few minutes, would you?… Bye, guys."
Danny hang up his phone and sighed, looking absently at the red traffic light in front of him. Every fiber in his body screamed for him to turn on the Camaro's police lights and rush to where he thought his partner was, but as he had told Chin, startle and make Steve feel hunted could be the worst course of action right now. So he just focused on following the traffic laws while hoping the high accurate instinct he knew he had when it came to his best friend wasn't failing him now.
Danny knew he shouldn't feel guilty, but he couldn't help it because based on previous experiences, he should have known that if there was even a remote possibility for the sedative to wear off earlier, it was bound to happen. Trust his partner to defy medicine. But mostly he felt guilty because he could imagine in what state Steve had been when he woke up to run away from the hospital like this. He told him he wasn't going anywhere and he had failed him. One thing Danny was sure though, this wasn't going to happen again, simply because Steve wasn't going to be out of his range of vision until he was completely recovered.
Silently making this decision Danny arrived to his destination and parked at a prudent distance.
Getting out of the car, Danny immediately started searching with his eyes through the dimly illuminated area, exhaling a deep, relieved breath when he made out the crouched form of his partner.
Thank God he's here.
He sent a quick message to Chin informing them he had found Steve and asking them to hold the cavalry with the promise of an update in the next few minutes.
Then he slowly approached Steve, giving him time to acknowledge his presence, which he did by tensing when he first heard steps but relaxing just as quickly when he realized who was the person getting closer. They both learned time ago to recognize each other's presence, no words needed. The fact that Steve could recognize him right now made Danny's concern recede a little.
Danny continued his approach until he came to stand just behind his friend, taking the time to observe him carefully, assessing his state. Steve wore scrubs and some kind of surgical shoes, his forearm had droplets of blood from where he ripped – again – his I.V. and he was slightly trembling.
All in all, it could be worse. He just stood behind Steve in silence, letting him know he was there but knowing better than to try to force any conversation.
Steve stretched an arm, gently passing his fingertips over the letters of his father's engraved name on the ground. Danny had the feeling since the beginning that Steve would have come here to convince himself of his father death, and he was sadly right, because the thought of his friend being so confused to need this kind of confirmation was just heartbreaking.
"He was here, Danny."
Danny just knelt by his side, passing an arm over his shoulders and gently squeezing him.
"He was here and wanted me to stay with him… He was proud of me."
Steve's voice sounded too young to Danny's ears, too broken. Danny had to swallow the lump on his throat before being able to speak again.
"I'm sure he was really proud of you, Steve. I'm so sorry you had to go through all this, but that part? That wasn't an illusion, buddy, I can tell you that. How could he not be proud of you, huh?"
Danny held him tighter when Steve dropped completely to his knees, putting both hands on his father's grave and taking a sharp breath. Then he cried. Silent, deep sobs that filled his face with tears and Danny's chest with a suffocating heaviness.
Steve cried for his father, for having lost him twice, he shed the tears he didn't have the time to shed four years ago when his only focus and priority was to find his murderer. But Danny knew there was more Steve was crying for, and he promised to himself he would try to make his friend talk about it when he was in a better mind frame, because not talking was obviously not working anymore.
For the moment he just held Steve tightly in his embrace, hoping it was enough to get him through this necessary breakdown.
Slowly, Steve's sobs became more spaced and his breathing more even, until he was silent again, his eyes unfocused on the ground before him. After waiting a few moments for a reaction that didn't arrive, Danny moved his hand from Steve's shoulder to the back of his neck, like he had done back in that room, hoping this time it would also be helpful for bringing his friend back to the here and now.
"Steve? Hey partner, you with me?"
Danny squeezed Steve's neck again, this time getting a blinking in response.
"Yeah…"
"I'm sorry buddy, but we need to go. You're pale and shivering and I really don't want you to collapse here. Are you okay? Can we go?"
Danny patiently waited while Steve focused once again on his father's name and then back on Danny's eyes before he nodded.
"Okay, let's go."
Danny was already helping Steve to his feet and mirroring the position from hours earlier when they were getting out of the building. Steve was a little unsteady but they made it to the car without trouble.
By the time Danny started the car Steve was silently staring through the window, clearly not in the mood for conversation, but Danny needed to decide what to do next and to do that he needed Steve's answers.
"Just so you know, even if I get why you needed to come here, if you pull a stunt like this again I'll handcuff you to the bed, am I clear? I'm not too fond of heart attacks, babe."
That made the corner of Steve's lips lift a little, but it only lasted for a second before his face became serious again.
"I'm sorry Danny. I woke up there and I was…alone and I… I didn't know…"
Steve was still not looking at him and Danny couldn't avoid the pinch of guilt coming back to him.
"I know, don't worry. That's why I said 'if you pull this again' instead of just handcuffing to the door handle. I shouldn't have left you alone, not even for a few minutes, but the doctor said you wouldn't wake up in a couple of hours and I thought… I'm so sorry Steve."
That made Steve finally look at Danny.
"You have nothing to be sorry about, Danno. It's just… I was disoriented, well I still feel a little confused. Those images keep flooding my mind and I just can't…"
Danny could tell that was all his partner was capable of saying right now, so he helped him changing the subject.
"How did you manage to get here anyway? You stole those clothes, didn't you? I have to say it, they fit you."
That earned Danny another tired smile from Steve.
"I woke up and I was disoriented, so I decided I needed to come here. I was looking for some clothes in the room when I saw my badge on the table. I took it, borrowed these clothes from the corridor closet and sneaked in the stairs. Once I was outside I took a cab and showed the driver my badge. He just brought me here."
"Just like that, uh, Super-SEAL?"
Danny observed with concern that Steve's breathing was more labored just with the effort of that little speech, and his forehead was covered with sweat.
"Babe, I know you're not gonna like this, but I need to take you to the hospital again."
He didn't manage to say anything else before Steve's agitated response.
"No! No more hospitals. I can't, Danny."
"Steve, you're breathing like you just ran a marathon and I'm sure you have a fever. The doctor told us he was worried about you developing a lung infection. How on earth are they supposed to treat you if we don't go to the hospital?"
"Danny… there was another room apart from the one you found me in. It was entirely white and they…" Steve made a pause, pressing his eyes shut for a few seconds before continuing, "when I woke up at the hospital and saw the white walls I thought I was there again. I know it would be the same each time and I just can't… please."
Danny considered the situation. Obviously Steve needed medical attention but it wouldn't do him any good if he was going to be in a constant state of agitation. There was just one possible solution.
"Okay, listen to me. I'm going to take you home and then call the hospital and ask them to send a medical team to check you and give you whatever they consider necessary. I'm sure they will agree given the… circumstances. But, and listen carefully to this part, you will obey everything they tell you to do or not to do, and if they say you need to go to the hospital we'll go. I'll paint the walls, cover them with pictures, I don't care, but we'll go. Understood?"
"Understood, Danno. Thank you."
Steve had laid his head on the window and was breathing with difficulty, his eyes closed, when a coughing fit caught him off guard and he doubled over himself with a pained expression until it receded.
All Danny could do was observe him while feeling utterly helpless.
"I think I'm already regretting my decision, we should just go to the hospital."
"I'm… fine."
"Yeah, you're just peachy, babe", Danny remarked dryly and sped a little. He just wanted to get Steve medical attention as soon as possible.
They arrived to Steve's house a few minutes later and Danny led him to his room and helped him to change into more comfortable clothes and lie on the bed, making sure to arrange enough pillows behind him to help him breathe. Steve was sweating even more and coughing every couple of minutes.
Danny stepped just out the door to call the hospital. As expected they understood the situation and told him a team would be there in ten minutes. Then he called Chin and updated him on the recent events, thanking him when he offered to come over and help but telling him there wasn't any need for all of them to be awake the whole night. Chin told him they would come the next day before hanging up.
Just then Danny heard the sirens and went down to show them the way. A different doctor and a nurse entered Steve's room and rapidly started to work. Steve's pain was visible on his face and the doctor asked him what was wrong while he cleaned and bandaged Steve's injured arm where he ripped the lines and attached a new I.V. on his hand this time.
"My head is killing me and my chest feels like it's on fire."
This must be the first pain admission Danny had heard coming out of his partner's mouth. It only made him more concerned.
"The headache it's caused by the concussion, commander. You should be in bed and move as little as possible for at least twenty-four hours. I also don't like how your breathing sounds, let me listen to it, please."
He put his stethoscope on Steve's chest and frowned at what he heard.
"I was right, it doesn't sound good and you're running a fever. I'm putting you on a high dose of I.V. antibiotics for at least one more day then we'll see if we can switch to pills. I'm going to do an EKG now to see how your heart is doing."
Right, his heart. He had also been electrocuted. Damn Wo Fat and his love for cattle prods. This time he really had brought all his repertory on Steve and Danny was surprised of how fast he could feel full of rage just by thinking about the bastard.
He observed as the doctor attached wires to Steve's chest and did the EKG while the nurse applied cream on the burns and hung the medication bags on the pole they had put beside the bed. The doctor seemed pleased with the EKG readings and Danny enjoyed the momentary relief.
"Commander, your heart seems fine for now, but I want you to rest for the next week. No exercise, nothing strenuous, I want you in bed for the next couple of days and then just take it easy, okay? I'm also going to give you something to help you with the headache now and leave more to your partner for later. We'll come back tomorrow to check you again and see if we can remove the I.V."
"Thanks, doctor." Steve didn't even open his eyes as he answered.
The doctor injected the painkiller and then they went to the door with Danny accompanying them.
Danny assured the doctor he would call if something happened or changed and thanked them again before closing the door and rushing upstairs again.
Steve's face had already relaxed but he was still sweating profusely. Danny went to the bathroom and soaked a small towel with fresh water before returning to his friend's side and putting it on his forehead. Steve just groaned softly but didn't open his eyes.
Danny changed himself into some sweats and a Navy t-shirt he borrowed from Steve and he knew it would make his partner grin in any other situation, then made a quick trip to the kitchen to retrieve some water for Steve and himself.
His partner started to look a little more agitated, as if the painkillers and the doze he seemed to have fallen in were transporting him back to that room. Or maybe he was back in the reality where his father was alive, but Danny doubted it, because that was a happy alternative reality for Steve and he didn't look happy at the moment. He had started to move his head and tense his arms like he couldn't escape something so Danny settled on the opposite edge of the bed to avoid accidentally hitting the I.V. pole and grabbed Steve's arm, squeezing it while whispering that he was home and he was fine.
It worked and Steve finally relaxed and fell into what Danny hoped was a deep, curative, nightmare-free sleep. So Danny kept his hand were it was and just reclined himself on the headboard, unable to avoid dozing too when the events of the day finally took a toll on him.
He didn't know how much time had passed when Steve's desperate voice woke him up. He quickly observed his partner looking for the origin of his distress but nothing had changed. Steve was just having a nightmare. The first of many to come, Danny supposed. He was now trashing frantically on the bed and suddenly yelled.
"I told you, I don't know. I don't know!"
Danny didn't think twice and grabbed his friend's arm, trying to shake him gently.
"Hey, Steve, wake up. You're alright, wake up, please!"
That made Steve open his eyes and a second later swing a fist in Danny's direction, but it was slow and Danny could catch it without problem. He laid Steve's arm back on the bed and grabbed him by the shoulders, squeezing again.
"C'mon, partner, it's me, Danny. You're alright, huh? Look at me, please."
Steve's eyes finally focused and he tried to sit a little more upright. Danny helped him and went to give him the glass of water.
"Drink a little. Are you okay? Do you need more painkillers?"
He gave Steve the glass and then checked the hand with the I.V. to make sure he hadn't messed it again, but it looked fine.
"Danny, you should go. At least go to the guest room. I… could hurt you."
"I'm sorry buddy, but you're stuck with me. Oh and I'm sorry for this too, but I saw your punch miles ago. You've got nothing to do against me."
Danny smiled at Steve and took the glass from him, asking him again if he needed anything else, which he refused as expected. He went back to the kitchen to refill the glass and to give Steve a few minutes to recompose and calm himself. When he came back to the room he was already dozing again and Danny took back his position by his friend's side ready to pull him from the nightmares whenever it was necessary.
Dawn arrived soon and the next day was similar to the previous night, Steve was actually too weak and tired to even try to get out of bed and he kept dozing most of the time. Danny was sure it was contributed by the painkillers he managed to make him take, which spoke volumes about the massive headache he must be experiencing.
The nightmares, hallucinations or whatever they were continued each time he slept, but Danny was always there to pull him out of the haze.
When the team came in the evening to check on both of them the medical team was checking Steve again. The doctor removed the I.V. giving Danny strict instructions about hydration and pill's schedule. He also wanted Danny to make Steve eat something, which the team managed together before they went home.
Steve smiled at them but barely spoke, he was being very silent since Danny found him at his father's grave. No one blamed him. Steve had a lot to process and Danny hoped he would open to him once he was ready to talk about whatever was eating his insides.
The next night Steve was even more agitated and Danny had to wake him up each time he fell asleep, so when he woke up abruptly Danny expected to see his partner trashing on the bed once again. But the bed was empty.
Danny got out of it so fast he almost tripped with a sheet and fell. He went downstairs and ran to the open door to the lanai, just to find Steve leaning heavily on the stairs' railing.
Danny quickly grabbed him by the waist and steadied him.
"What did I tell you about giving me heart attacks, Steven? Are you okay?"
Steve was rubbing a thumb on his temple.
"I'm fine, just got a little dizzy."
"Well that's what happens when you have a concussion and decide to go build sand castles in the middle of the night. Come here, take a seat."
He gently motioned Steve to sit in one of the chairs before going to the kitchen to bring him water and a painkiller, which he took without complaining after seeing the look Danny was giving him.
"So, wanna tell me what are you doing out here?", Danny asked while sitting in the other chair.
"I needed some fresh air and I didn't want to wake you up. You're not sleeping all that much."
"I'm not sleeping… are you seriously worried for me? I'm fine, Steve, you're the one who can't get more than ten minutes of peaceful sleep. Is something specially bothering you today, buddy?"
Steve looked absently to the ocean, the moon was almost full so the night was clear and the waves had a tinge of silver.
Danny just patiently waited for his friend to find the words.
"He told me he was my brother."
"Wo Fat? You ran the DNA, you know he is not your brother."
"He told me Doris felt guilty about having killed his mother instead of his father and decided to raise him as his own. He referred to her as 'our mother'."
Danny couldn't believe his ears. Doris' ability to always keep an even darker secret from Steve was reaching unbearable levels.
"That's why he took you? To tell you this? I don't really see the point."
"He thought I knew where his father is being kept. I told him I didn't know, but he just wouldn't listen. It was Shelburne all over again."
Steve was wrong. This was even worse than Shelburne, because Steve didn't know anything about his mother's lies when Shelburne occurred.
"But why didn't he ask your mother? It would be more logical for her to know that."
"That's what I said. He said he had already asked 'our mother' and that she didn't know. That she would have told him if she knew, because apparently she did answer his questions."
"You don't know that, babe." Danny didn't want to defend Doris at all, but he couldn't stand Steve's betrayed expression.
"Oh I know it. She went to visit him more than once, Danny. She avoided me like crazy but went to see him. She knew everything he had done to me and still went to see him!"
Steve was looking at Danny now, eyes bright and red.
"Maybe she wanted to talk him out of hurting you again. Maybe she was protecting you."
Danny didn't believe a word of what he just said, but Steve fell silent again for a minute, looking at the sand and sighing deeply.
"He told me he was my brother and I… I killed him."
"No. Listen to me. You didn't kill him. You survived. He would have killed you without a second thought but you fought until the end and you survived. Don't you dare thinking otherwise." Danny paused, making sure he had his partner's undivided attention. "He also wasn't your brother. He was your mother's decision and that doesn't make him related to you in any way. I can tell you I'm happy to know he won't be menace for you anymore."
Steve gave him a small smile.
"Thanks, Danny." Steve looked at him like he wanted to say something else, but couldn't find the words. He then looked away again. "Now if you don't mind, I think I'm going to try and sleep a little longer."
"If I don't mind? I'm going to lock you on the bedroom so go ahead please."
Danny helped Steve to stand up and go to the bedroom where he almost collapsed on the mattress. Danny was taking his position beside him when Steve reached and put a hand on Danny's arm. His eyes were already closed and his voice was barely a whisper when he said "Thank you, brother".
Danny put his other hand on top of Steve's and answered in the same whispery voice "Always, babe."
Steve fell almost immediately in the deepest and most serene sleep Danny had witnessed since this entire nightmare had begun.
Danny still observed his friend for a while, wanting to make sure he wasn't going to get caught in a haze, but at the same time enjoying the feeling spreading inside of him that with time and the support of his Ohana, Steve was going to be just fine.
Thanks for reading, and for all the kind reviews, favorites and follows. They mean more than you know, so keep them coming! :)
I'm planning a third chapter from Steve's POV, but it will take a little longer because as I told you I'm going to be out of town.
I hope you enjoyed it and I still want to hear your thoughts about it!
