Positive feedback, at quick notice? Wow, I'm flattered blush blush. So... IZ comic? Anyone excited? :) (I wrote this in the space of 4/5 hours, and it's currently 3 in the morning... I'm so tired, proof reading may be faulty)
Pleasedon'tkillmepleasedon'tkillmepleasedon'tkillme...
"You seem like a cheerful little thing."
"Eh..." Eep.
"How endearing that something so small and pathetic can remain full of glee..."
What'shisfaceohIdon'tcare shriveled away from Zim as he continued to speak at irregular intervals. He was absolutely terrified, so much so that he smiled for his life with the toothiest smile he could possibly accomplish. "Right this way, sir..."
"I used to be that happy once," he continued happily, "it was the most horrible time of my life. But not now, now I finally go out to freely rain destruction and cruelty down upon an unsuspecting planet..."
"Sounds delightful, sir," What'shisface nodded.
Walking down several corridors (27.8-BIT to be exact), What'shisface couldn't help but notice the many whispers and gasps and grunts and coughing advertised by his fellow janitorial drones and random guards avoiding their duties to stare at the abomination following him.
Zim observed the hallway and the sickly chattering figures. "I remember when things weren't so easy for you little smeet creatures, when you couldn't just hop into a janitorial profession after downloading on Irk. You get things too easy! You should be overjoyed, especially in the presence of an invader! My generation fought and bled for our positions, you people are full of laziness!"
What'shisface noticed that Zim's fists were clenched, pulling down his sides as if he was attempting to control his sudden burst of aggression. "Y-yes, sir! I'm full of appreciation, woo!... Even though I was put here because I didn't show any further growth after five years of existence, so here I am, sir... I've been here now for 3 months... It's great, being able to work so near the Tallests despite the height thing. Sometimes though, I think I'm just here to make them feel taller... Not that I mind, really! I'm exhausted a lot of the time, but I'm okaydokey!"
"... Pfft, this is taking too long..." Zim announced quietly a moment later, glancing around with the vaguest expression of boredom.
"It's not long now, sir. I assure you!" What'shisface squeeked.
"It better not, my mission awaits me!"
"Mhm..." Answered a small voice.
After a solid 10 minutes of walking, and walking, a bit of yelling at some hopeless bystander (by Zim, of course), and they had arrived at the garbage bay.
"HEY."
What'shisface shrunk back at the suddenness of Zim's voice. "Yes...?"
"What is this?" He nearly spat.
"I-Uh-Ohnoes-Er-Argh..." Cough-cough-cough. "It's the garbage bay, sir."
After a pause, Zim looked at the large room containing nothing but giant boxes filled with broken pieces of machinery, scattered PAKs, and one box in particular marketed as 'What'sthisSTUFF?'. Zim looked back down at him and waved at all of the junk in the room.
What'shisface's antennae fell and he walked into the room and rummaged around the boxes. "There's some TOPSECRET stuffs down here, that nobody knows about... Well, except me, and that baby rat-person over there."
Zim looked at the corner of the room where a big eyed rat-person chewed aimlessly at it's own foot. "Eh..."
"She's not feeling well at the minute, her entire family was brutally murdered in cold blood. You know, the whole Blorch planet and it went zap and spoosh, I isolated her in a transportation beam and brought her on board," What'shisface smiled with delight. "She won't hurt anyone, I feed her regularly," a short, dark giggle proceeded to escape What'shisface.
"..." Zim gave the creature a puzzled look, "neat."
"Nobody talks to me really, so I get away with a few things. You can relate to an extent, right? I hear a lot of things about you from everyone."
Zim picked up a pack of doughnut, and sniffed at the opening of the bag. "My equipment, smeet. My mission is imminent."
"O-oh... Yeah..." What'shisface scratched his antennae and hummed, "I have-I... I've made some stuff down here that you might appreciate."
"Uhuh," Zim grumbled with disinterest as he threw the doughnut bag away in disgust.
"Let me see here... Nope, nu-uh, nonononono, eh..." What'shisface threw something dark and disgusting away in the baby rat-person's direction. "I actually don't know where that one came from, haha!"
Zim stared blankly at the baby rat-person as she ate what appeared to be half of a decaying squeedily-spooch, and then blinked motionlessly.
"I found it! Yes!" What'shisface cried with joy as he pulled out a deactivated robot that was just a bit smaller than he was. "This might need a bit of fixing, but trust me, it's great when it works! It's a SIR unit, or at least was, or... It could just be a faulty food drone robot thingy... I kept him, because I-"
"Broken?! You give me defective equipment?!"
"And you're not the slightest bit interested in fixing it up?!"
"..."
"I'm sorry..." His antennae flattened. "But it's seriously cool, I've already put the parts together and installed a colour system! Blue! How unique is that?! Fits you perfectly!"
"... What else is there?" He asked with a mild sense of confusion and interest.
"Lots, you can have some of it, but the rest is mine... This is my hobby, you see, what I want more than anything is to be an engineer..."
"Mhmm..." Zim hummed whilst he emptied the box labelled 'What'sthisSTUFF?' and put the most decently acquired items inside, leaving out the dookie.
"... That transmitter is mine... It was the first thing I built... It can broadcast over 8 galaxies..."
"Oh really huh..." Zim tossed it out of the box, "boring."
The transmitter shattered on the cold metal floor.
"... I'll just build another then..." What'shisface whimpered and swept up the remains.
Zim ignored the pathetic whimpering and sweeping to collect more and more items of interest.
"This will sound weird, okay?"
Zim appeared to be ignoring What'shisface still, staring at a simulation pad; a meek gaming device that was used before even his smeethood.
"You're not like what they keep saying about you," he continued as he put the remains of his old transmitter into a rotten box. "I mean, you're weird and destructive and stuff, but that's it."
"And what do they say exactly?" Zim glanced back at him, before throwing the simulation pad at the baby rat-person, who caught and ate it.
"... Stuff, bad stuff... And some sad stuff, and some scary stuff too."
Zim groaned and moved on.
"They say stuff about me sometimes, so I can understand a bit... Being called defective I mean."
"Defective?"
What'shisface stared with surprise as he recognized a hint of genuine misunderstanding in Zim's voice. He shook his head and smiled a big toothy grin. "Nevermind, take this!"
The broken 'SIR' unit was thrown at Zim, nearly knocking him off his feet. "Don't do that again!"
"Sorry, sir!"
"What would I want with this?! It's disgusting!"
"I think it's good."
"Nobody cares what you think, especially not me."
"... It'll keep you company, it's nice to be around others... When they aren't trying to repeatedly humiliate you or destroy the shreds of dignity or confidence you might have I mean."
"Zim needs no one."
"I want it back then," What'shisface smirked, folding his arms.
"It's mine."
What'shisface giggled, "you're weird!"
...
"Insanitine Suppresicine; for oral use, place one tablet under the tongue once each day. Side effects may include numbess around the mouth, complete loss of speech and an inability to chew or swallow. Intended use for shutting up someone apparently. Now what's the other one... Eterniclide Dethicole; for oral use, swallow before intended rest with water. Side effects may include paralysis, comatose, brain damage, death and in rare cases insomnia and paranoia."
Dib walked down the empty sidewalk, several blocks away from his home, or at least where he thought his home was. He was supposed to be picked up at the mental institute early that morning and driven home, but apparently there wasn't enough funding to provide transportation. It didn't matter, it was late spring, and the sky was a deep orange colour and the birds were chirping aimlessly in the artificial trees planted along the sidewalk.
"This isn't exactly encouraging," spoke Dib out loud to himself. "I mean, brain damage and death kinda defeats the point of trying to help someone get over serious mental illness..." Then again, it would remove a nuisance from society when looking at it from a bigger point of view. "That's still screwed up."
It wasn't a long walk before he reached his house, which was pleasantly still where he remembered it being. "Well... Here goes," he spoke in a sigh as he opened the front door. He was met by the same old living room from his childhood, but no dad, and no Gaz. "Oh... Well I did miss that couch."
Dib closed the door behind him and slumped onto the wonderful old couch. "Sure does beat the metal stools in the Crazy House cafeteria..."
"Oh, you're back?" Came the ring of a familiarly dark feminine voice.
"Oh, Gaz... Hi."
Gaz stood there holding a juice box and a sandwich, she was still dressed the same as he remembered. All seemed normal so far, to an extent. "I was watching that, and you're sitting in my spot."
"Oh, right, sorry." He shuffled over to the other side of the couch, and looked at the tv screen displaying a paused episode of some foreign vampire piggy cartoon.
Gaz sat on the couch, ignoring Dib as though he wasn't there at all.
"Are there any more juice boxes?"
Her eyes seemed to open in a moment to glance at him. "Only if you don't bother me."
"I won't, don't worry. I'm not really in the mood to express my interests and obsessions at the minute. But I'd kill for a juice box..." He jested.
"You know where they are," she concluded, taking a bit out of her sandwich before pressing play on the remote control.
It was grapefruit flavoured, but that was okay. It was still worth it.
"They cancelled Mysterious Mysteries."
"Oh, did they?"
"The host killed himself and nobody replaced him."
"Ah..." He finished the juice box and threw it in the trash can. Good old trash can, being where he remembered. "What season did it finish at then?"
"... I dunno, two if you count the unfinished one."
"That quick...?" Dib sighed as he scratched his head. "I knew that guy... Don't remember his name though, strange."
"Go away, Dib. You're bothering me."
"... Right... Well, I'll see you later then..." Dib muttered and made for his room.
His room was still the same, surprisingly. A bit dusty, and missing his old posters and books and paranormal collections, but still the same otherwise. "Must've been dad, after the accident..."
He jumped onto his bed, and opened the window to look out at the street. Someone passed by his house dolled in a menacing clown suit, followed by a giant lizard like tail. "It doesn't exist, it doesn't make sense..."
He fell back against his dark blue sheets and hit against something sharp. "Argh! What the hell was that?" He asked, searching under the sheets. What he found was the unfinished season two of Mysterious Mysteries of Strange Mystery, with a sticky note on it which read 'shut up and keep things to yourself.'
"Oh, I guess I owe Gaz now..." He smiled briefly.
