The group moved again that night. Rick gave no reason other than they needed to 'get away.' He led the pack to a completely new town that Rick had flagged on the map. From what Daryl could tell he didn't ask for any input from the rest of the group. The town Rick picked out was a good few days away forcing the group to spend more than a few nights vulnerable and unprotected in the dark. The back tracking and twisting paths they were forced to travel made progress slow. But Daryl preferred the slower pace to rushing them headlong into danger.

The downside was he couldn't properly set traps or go hunting for longer than an hour. The left over supplies they collected disappeared so quickly. It always did. The constant need to eat was the only thing Daryl dreamed about. Well that and the lingering pain from his last talk with Rick. They weaved in his dreams choking him and tormenting him. The sound of gurgles and hungry whimpers only caused the nightmares to grow worse and worse. The sounds and dreams suffocating him.

He wasn't certain if he was imagining or really seeing the disappointment or agony in their faces when they looked at him. His eyes were constantly playing tricks on his mind. The hunger and sleepless nights were taking their toll on him. Every time he was hunting Daryl felt like he was being followed by someone just on the edge of his mind. Right outside the range of his hearing, someone lingered. A shadow stalking his movements following his breath on the air. Daryl found himself one day spending half of the afternoon following a boar that only turned out to be nothing but his exhausted mind projecting the very thing he needed to provide to the group.

By the end of the first week the group was exhausted and weary. Not tired but bone weary and heavy with depression. The urge to find a house weighed heavily on all their minds. Daryl rested his head against one of the cars closing his eyes trying to get a few minutes of sleep before Rick and the rest of them cleared out a house they thought would be safe enough for the next few days. He kept himself on the edge of the group trying to keep himself small and quiet. Hoping he'd fade away into the background. He wished they still had some of those energy drinks but that was several weeks ago that they polished them off. His body was desperate for something to keep himself running. He could feel his body already slowing, his reactions sluggish.

"You haven't forgotten your promise have you?" Daryl cracked an eye open while his body screamed in protest, clinging to the idea of having a few more seconds of rest. Lori was resting against the car next to him looking at Rick in the middle of talking with Carl. He had a small smile on his face in response to Carl's words.

"I haven'." He mumbled. He and Lori hadn't talked since she made him give her his oath. He couldn't bring himself to try and talk to her.

"Rick keeps putting himself in dangerous situations." She whispered looking scared. Daryl guessed she was talking about the first night when Rick had tried to clear a house by himself until Daryl had sprinted after him realizing his intention. Only for them to both realize too late that the house had been full of walkers, too many for them to handle alone. Daryl had forced his leader out a window covering his back as the man landed on the hard ground below. The group was forced to make a speedy retreat. The nerves hadn't left Daryl for over a day. Especially when he considered how reckless Rick was being. It wasn't like him at all. Daryl couldn't help but feel Rick was putting himself in danger on purpose, like he hoped that the danger would make the hunter leave him alone.

While Daryl pulled away and retreated inside of himself, Rick seemed to get reckless and dangerous like he was too busy being angry and hurt to realize how close he'd come to dying over the last few days. Daryl couldn't help but wonder if his leader had learned of the oath he'd made to Lori and was testing the limits and boundaries of the oath. Could Rick actually be that cruel?

"I know." Daryl mumbled. Lori turned a sharp reproachful eye on the hunter.

"You better not allow anything to happen to him."

"I won'." Daryl returned. They both turned their eyes to Rick who was nodding at Carl. "How are ya feelin'?" Daryl asked noticing the way she stared at her family with big sorrowful eyes. The way she kept hugging herself like there was no comfort left in the world for her. Lori looked genuinely surprised by his concern.

"I'm tired and hungry" She sighed. He expected her to blame him for both problems but she didn't even glance his direction. But Daryl still felt the pang of guilt knowing he'd let the group go hungry again. It sunk deep in his chest. "I'm worried for the baby." She breathed.

"It'll be okay." Daryl responded softly.

"If I have this baby on the road we'll all be in danger." She had a haunted look. "There will be no way to quiet a crying infant. All the walkers would come running. Everyone would be in peril if that happened."

"We'll manage." Daryl reassured her.

Rick called everyone over picking the members to clear the house. His eyes were dark, cold, and controlled as he gazed at them. He didn't even look at Daryl as he put together the group to break into the house. They tried to switch the duty between them all to make sure none of the group got rusty.

Though Daryl and Rick seemed to be the only ones who never switched out. Daryl because he knew he was better suited for killing walkers and making sure everyone made it out okay. Rick because he needed to know nothing would go wrong when he wasn't looking. Though his willingness to be self-sacrificing at the worst times made Daryl's oath to keep him safe all the harder to fulfil. The more Rick tried to put himself in dangerous situations the closer Daryl had to push himself to stay close to his leader. Lori's glares haunted Daryl's every movement. Constantly reminding him, he had to keep his oath.

"Same tactic as usual. Stay close and safe together. Cover each other's backs." Rick directed the group. Daryl noticed Carl's hand on his gun. He and Lori shared a quick moment, their eyes full of concern. Daryl was worried, sure Carl had gotten pretty good at killing walkers and his aim was getting better and better but he didn't have the physical strength that T-Dog had or Glenn's speed. Would Rick really put his son in such danger? The hunter wondered while watching his leader.

More than that the hunter noticed Beth in line with the others, getting ready to clear the house. Her small hands tight on the handle of an axe, she was working hard to stop herself from quaking. Daryl realized Rick intended to leave him behind. To help move the supplies in rather than clear. Rick and those who were clearing the house checked their weapons. Broken weapons or empty clips was one of the things they did their best to avoid, nothing was more dangerous than being unarmed against walkers.

Daryl didn't have to turn to know Lori was glaring daggers into his back. He got her message loud and clear, and he agreed full heartedly. Protecting Rick and Carl would be damn near impossible without being in the heat of danger. Being outside didn't allow him to watch their backs at all. He moved swiftly, Daryl clasped Beth on the shoulder.

"Why don' ya sit this one out?" He suggested. She stared at him hard. He could see the relief running through her young face but there was also concern for his own wellbeing mixed together in her sweet innocent eyes.

"Are you sure? You look exhausted. You should rest a bit." She gripped the handle tighter until her knuckles went white. "I can handle this." Daryl shook his head.

"I'll go nuts out here. Let me work some of the tension out of my body." Beth's lips thinned in a frown. She didn't believe him at all. "Look I'm…" He licked his lips and lowered his voice. "Worried about Lori. She's not lookin' that good. If somethin' happened I wouldn' know what to do. So do me a favor and keep an eye on her?" Beth glanced over at Lori, her eyes lingering on the woman's pale skin and huge belly. She gave the hunter a small smile.

"Alright, I'll keep my eye on her. Stay safe okay?" She whispered moving to join Lori against the car. Daryl shifted his crossbow on his back. Rick was pointedly ignoring him (like usual) but the hunter knew that he had to let his leader know about the switch. He wanted to remind Rick that he couldn't kick him out of the clearing operation that easily. Daryl licked his lips and stepped over to Rick who was pushing bullets into his Colt.

"I thought I was in charge of this group." Rick mumbled, his voice cold and angry. Daryl gulped and shifted awkwardly.

"Ya are." Rick nodded and turned his gaze onto Daryl. The anger made the lines in his face darker and more pronounced.

"Then what makes you think you can change the rotation that I set up?" The hostility in the man's voice nearly made the hunter walk away, not wanting to hear it from Rick. He could handle it from everyone…but him. "What makes you think you should be allowed to switch things up whenever you feel the urge to?"

"Ya know I'm a better fighter. I've killed more walkers than all ya'll put together." Daryl defended. Rick glared at Daryl his eyes painfully full of rage and hatred. Daryl sighed and worked the angry edge of his temper back under his control. That was the major difference between him and Merle. Merle always got caught in other people's tempers. He got swept up in their emotions. They treated him with annoyance and he would respond with rage.

Daryl was able to keep his anger in check and managed to keep a level head…usually. But Rick's complete hatred and anger towards him made a violent angry ball of hate flare to life in his gut. He worked hard to stop himself from yelling at Rick that he knew he needed Daryl. That he was good at clearing places and he was even better at killing walkers. He forced his mouth shut to stop himself from telling Rick to pull his head out of his ass and leave whatever bitchy feelings he felt about their ruined relationship behind.

"I picked Beth because she needs to work on killing them."

"We've all worked on that. She can handle her own just fine." Rick eyes narrowed dangerously.

"How about you? Can you handle yourself?" Rick hissed viciously.

"Of course I can." Daryl responded immediately. But a bead of sweat rolled down his neck.

"Really?" Rick moved closer to where he could whisper in Daryl's ear. The heat created from Rick's body sent a shiver down Daryl's spine. "You look like you're barely able to stand on your feet. A solid breeze would knock you over. I pulled you because you can't handle this. You're at your breaking point Daryl. We can all see it." Rick pressed his lips to Daryl's ear hissing his harsh words into Daryl's body. The hunter breathed the anger and hatred into his lungs where it sat and consumed him. "Sit out for once and do as you're told. Otherwise you'll put us all in harm's way."

Daryl pushed the tremble that threatened to take over his body back down his spine. He knew Rick was right. He had trouble aiming lately. His hands shook too much too often to be able to control his bow properly. His ears and mind was constantly playing tricks on him. But Rick was also wrong, he was weak certainly (they all were) but he wasn't at his breaking point. Not yet. He'd been worse off. Winter's bitter chill nipped at his mind. This was nothing compared to that year.

"I've got it." Rick glared searching his eyes for a lie.

"Do you?"

"I won' brin' us down. Ya know me. I'll keep up." Rick kept checking his eyes trying to find the lies hidden inside the hunter. But Daryl knew he wouldn't slow them down. He wouldn't let himself do that. Rick being unable to find any reason to stop the hunter sighed and nodded.

"Fine. If you collapse though you put us all in danger, remember that."

"If I collapse ya can leave me behind." Daryl returned firmly. Rick's eyes shifted color quickly. An emotion passed behind them so fast Daryl couldn't figure out what his leader was thinking.

"Alright let's get this done." Rick commanded the group. He lead Carl, T-Dog, and Daryl down the block towards the house. The rest of the group waited at the ready, all prepared to escape at a moment's notice should things go south. Rick kicked the door open. Daryl moved in with the others. He checked his rooms slowly thoroughly, he didn't want to leave anything up to chance. They had a nasty incident once with a young walker coming out from under one of the beds.

The room was clear but he heard a creak to his left. He raised his crossbow moving slowly to the hallway. The hunter kept quiet ready to strike if he had to. The door flew open and Daryl let out a breath of relief. He couldn't help the smile when he nodded at Rick, the relief at being able to do something to help the group almost overwhelmed him. At being able to keep his eyes on Rick, knowing he couldn't get hurt while the hunter was watching him. Rick stared at him for a moment before dropping his gaze down quickly. The man moved away from the hunter quickly, like he couldn't stand to be in the same room as him. Daryl couldn't really blame him. But he knew they had to put their issues aside, at least for the moment.

Daryl sighed and started up the stairs with T-Dog, going opposite from him to check the top floors. The moment T-Dog was out of sight Daryl pressed his shoulder against the wall. He panted the floor spinning under his feet. The hunter struggled to keep on his feet as black spots danced around his eyes. He felt his face flushing with a fever. Keep it together, he thought fiercely. The hunter breathed through his mouth and forced his body off the wall. He shook his head urging his eyes to clear of the haze strangling his mind. He gripped his crossbow using it as an anchor. When Daryl felt stable enough he nudged the door open. At first fear punched at his gut. He worried he'd fainted or was hallucinating again. But when the thin great horned owl gave a soft hoot Daryl realized it was a real breathing owl. More importantly it was food. He aimed and breathed slowly waiting until his hands stopped shaking before taking the shot.

He rejoiced when he scooped it from the ground. It wasn't as fat as he had hoped but it was a meal and that they couldn't pass up. Daryl was already working on pulling the feathers out when the rest of the group started moving things in. No one rejoiced at his catch, they all realized how long it would take to prepare. They had also learned the hard way that so many animals seem like they'd be full of meat for everyone to dine on for days when in reality there was barely enough to push their hunger aside. It was nowhere near enough to satisfy the gnawing ache inside of them. Daryl was so focused on the bird that he didn't notice Rick moving.

So when his leader broke the deep silence by slamming something into the fireplace Daryl jumped his whole body tense waiting for a belt to hit his back or a knife to swipe at his stomach. It took a moment for him to remember where he was and that he wasn't a child anymore, fearing his father's wrath. Daryl realized he was hungrier and weaker than he originally thought. His mind had jumped to his childhood automatically rather than the present moment. Once they ate and rested, he'd be in better shape, the hunter decided.

He glanced to the fire place seeing dog food still rocking from the force it was smashed against the back wall. He could understand Rick's anger, how he didn't want to believe they could ever sink that low. Ever be that desperate for food. But Daryl knows the hard way that sometimes that's all you can find to eat. True the group had never been that bad off, not yet. But Daryl had been that desperate before. He's known the hunger that goes so deep that it causes you to vomit when you finally manage to get something inside of you. The hunger that makes you feel so painfully hollow that it feels like your insides are eating themselves. The hunter takes a moment to look around the room, everyone's face is fallen and dark. Hunger and depression makes the room feel heavy. The air painful to breath in.

Daryl hoped he could clean the owl fast enough for them to have something for lunch. It would help, if only a little. T-Dog gave a whistle and everyone moved like lighting. None of them needed words they all knew what the whistle meant. Carol took the owl from him so he could ride without distraction. He nodded to her giving a silent thanks, before pushing off and leading them away from the neighborhood and the unwelcome walkers.

He stopped them at a small rest stop the visibility was good and there was a small pit they could cook his owl in. The cars were parked where they could drive away quickly should another horde appear on the horizon. Daryl pressed the kickstand of his brother's bike down. He closed his eyes. All he wanted was to close his eyes and rest against the handle bars. But Rick's clear voice woke up the weary hunter.

"Need to set up watch. T-Dog, Glenn there and there." Daryl clambered off Merle's bike and joined everyone. Daryl's exhausted body already giving a howl in protest, he forced himself to keep moving. Carol moved to his side first.

"Here." She whispered. "I got most of the feathers off." Daryl smiled gratefully as he took the owl.

"Ya didn' have to."

"Oh I didn't do it for you. I expect you to give me the first piece." Carol returned with a smirk. They smiled at each other. Daryl and Carol both knew she much like him would never actually ask for anything like that. They were both the most likely candidates to give up their portions so Lori, Carl, and Beth could have more to eat.

"Surprised ya didn' say ya wanted the whole thin'." He teased.

"Well I have to watch my waist line!" Daryl shook his head enjoying this momentary break from the hardships of late.

"Come on let's fry up a bird." He stomped to the fire pit. Daryl crouched down checking to see if any of the wood would still be good. The top was rather damp but the bottom log would probably make a decent fire. He tossed it on the pit before piling on sticks for kindling. Daryl looked for a good starter for the fire; some paper maybe a newspaper would be perfect.

"Use this." Carl said squatting down next to Daryl. He had a couple of pages from a comic book in his hand. The hunter grunted his thanks and flicked his lighter to life. Daryl held the burning pages against the log and sticks waiting for the flame to spread. Soon they had a decent fire roaring to life. Daryl speared the owl straight through with a fire prod and propped it up on top of the pit making a strange rotisserie grill.

"Sorry ya had to ruin one of yer comics." Carl shrugged.

"Have to grow up sometime." He mumbled. Daryl's gut clenched. Carl had grown a lot the last few months but still he couldn't help but wish the boy could have a few more years of an actual childhood. The hunter knew it was impossible but he couldn't help but see his own childhood reflected in Carl. He knew how hard it was to be forced to grow up too soon. Though he never had to worry about walkers, Daryl couldn't imagine how Carl felt having so many things stolen from him. Carl glanced around and moved a little closer to Daryl and whispered. "Besides those were just ads." Daryl grinned and brightened at Carl's cocky smile.

"Well that's good can' have yer comics be ruined. It would ruin yer comic shop." Carl smiled.

"Yeah walkers will make great customers." He shared a grin with Daryl, they had talked once about opening a joint bookstore and comic book shop. It had been a way to pass the long night watch one evening but Carl had enjoyed the idea and even Daryl found himself pleased with all the plans Carl came up with for their shop. Such as the 'take your picture with a human' for those walkers that wanted to bring a little something special to show off to all their other walker buddies. The moment pasted as Carl grew cold and solemn as he stared at the fire. He sat down on the ground as his eyes looked far beyond the moment they were in. It reminded Daryl of Rick, he couldn't help but wonder if Carl was the spitting image of Rick when he was a teenager. The hunter cleared his throat forcing the thoughts from his mind.

"How'd ya do clearin' today?" Carl touched the gun at his hip.

"I killed a walker." Daryl eyed the boy, there was a look of utter glee in his eyes that was almost alarming. Daryl didn't kill walkers because he enjoyed it. He did it because it was the group or the walkers. Live or die. But he always tried to make sure it was a quick death regardless. The walkers that he killed were dead (again) before they realized what hit them.

Daryl doubted the walkers could feel anything remotely close to pain, especially after what Jenner had told them. He didn't see them as alive. He never suffered from thoughts or hopes that they might get better like Hershel had. But still when he thought of what they used to be, his breath caught in his throat on the rare occasion. Daryl just knew that if he was a walker he wouldn't want someone to needlessly prolong his existence. He'd want to be put down quick and clean, none of that hacking off limbs or anything. Just one hit and down for time with Shane on the farm came to mind, Daryl had understood what he was trying to prove back then, but the way he went about it still left a bitter taste in his mouth.

As Daryl looked at Carl he thought of his brother. Merle delighted in killing walkers. It was probably part of the reason he wanted to go to Atlanta because he knew there would be plenty of them for him to kill. Hell when Daryl found Merle after the world ended he was on a roof shooting walkers and survivors alike. Carl was watching him with bright eyes clearly waiting for his approval.

"Were ya careful?"

"Yep!" Carl nodded enthusiastically.

"Then ya did a good job." Daryl said patting Carl's hat moving it around on his head. Carl flushed and ducked his head down. His cheeks red but there was a firm smile on his lips. Daryl wouldn't ever hesitate against walkers but still he felt remorse when he thought about how many had died already and how many were probably dying right now as he made food. Sometimes it felt like their group was the only one left in a world full of dead. Daryl pushed the depressing thoughts from his mind, he didn't have time to think about such things. Survival was all that mattered not remorse or regrets. The hunter turned the owl over, one side crispy already. Carl dug lines in the dirt with his finger.

"Are you and dad fighting?" Daryl almost choked.

"W-what?" He sputtered, Carl glanced at the hunter sideways.

"Are you?"

"What makes ya think that?" Daryl tried to cover his embarrassment. When the hell did kids get so sharp?

"You used to spend lots of time together." Daryl swallowed as his cheeks warmed at the thought that Carl might have seem them together. Embarrassment pulsed through him like a wave. "Training and hunting. Keeping watch together. But you don't do that anymore." The hunter sighed relieved, Carl didn't know anything about the real reason why they were fighting. He had jumped to conclusions. The hunter felt a cool wave of calm rush against his bones, as bad as having Lori and Rick hating him, trying to explain what had happened exactly to Carl would be a thousand times worse.

"We're not fightin'."

"But you aren't talking. It's like you two can't stand to being in the same room." Daryl licked his lips trying to figure out the best way to word this. Rick would be able to say something meaningful but Daryl was no good at little heart to heart chats. That was Rick's forte.

"It's… complicated."

"That's dumb." Carl glared at him, Daryl quirked an eyebrow. "Our lives are complicated enough. Surviving is complicated enough. It's dumb to let things stay complicated between us. We're all family." Carl said firmly. Daryl's heart stuttered at the boy's words. Family? They were all survivors sure, people who need the same thing from each other. But family? He'd never thought about that. Never dared to let himself think that. Daryl's chest hurt at the idea. The fear of failing the group grew rapidly in his mind. He had failed the Dixon family time and time again. But what about his new family? Could he ever be good enough for them? Daryl doubted it.

"Family huh?" Daryl mumbled closing his eyes.

"Well yeah. We're all a big family. I mean everyone has lost most of their family haven't they?" Daryl nodded glancing around thinking of all the people they'd all lost both before and after becoming a group. "My family is the only one that's mostly intact." Carl titled his head up to Daryl. His eyes bright and achingly full of youth. A broad easy grin warmed his face. "So then we'll just make everyone a part of our family. Since we won't lose each other, we won't have to worry about losing any more of family. Because we'll keep each other safe. That's what a family does. They protect each other."

Daryl chuckled at Carl's easy solution. Despite how he'd grown, there was still some of that hopeful child buried deep inside. The same child who had thought he'd be able to find Sophia safe, the child that was quickly disappearing under the grim reality of life. But in this moment Daryl could see the child Carl was supposed to be at this time in his life, not the man he was forced to become. Carl watched Daryl before chewing his lip. "Is that lame? It's lame huh?" He mumbled curling in on himself.

"Nah it's not. Just never thought about it that way." Carl brightened considerably.

"Well we are aren't we? A family I mean." Daryl hesitated before nodding shakily. "Though I think you should keep your last name. Daryl Grimes sounds weird." Carl chuckled.

Daryl couldn't hear Carl suddenly, his face burned hot. His throat closed and his pulse raced. Daryl suddenly felt like a teenage girl writing her sweetheart's last name in the place of her own, in a little notebook full of hearts and mushy feelings. Daryl wanted to scream. He had thought he'd closed off his heart. That nothing could shake his resolve at this point. But Carl's simple easy words shook him to the core. They wormed their ways deep inside of him. "So if we're a family you shouldn't fight." Carl continued not noticing Daryl's internal panic. "Dad's right, we're together and alive. We have to stay that way. We have to protect each other. Family is forever. I mean in the end we're all we've got." Daryl stared at the flames his mind racing. Could he really protect them? Everyone he'd failed to save, to help flashed before his eyes. Their eyes looking at him with disgust. Could he save anyone when he couldn't save himself?

Daryl ducked his head holding his tongue as he cooked the owl. His mind echoing Carl's words. He tried to figure how Carl's obvious feelings towards the group included him. He struggled to understand his place amongst them especially after the sudden revelation. Carl seemed content to sit in silence watching the fire as Daryl struggled internally. He was sinking deeper into his confusion trying to force his way through the chaotic mental state he found himself in. A soft sigh at his side made Daryl jump. At his side was none other than Rick. Carl looked around Daryl before he gave the hunter a cheeky grin clearly thinking the hunter would take his words to heart and attempt to fix things between them.

All Daryl wanted to do was sprint in the opposite direction. Rick wasn't touching him but he was close enough that Daryl could feel the heat from the man's skin against his. It was the not touching that Daryl noticed the most. The obvious closeness but deliberate distance made his stomach jump and twist. Rick was staring at the fire but Daryl noticed the weary look in his eyes. It felt like Rick was doing everything in his power to not look at him. Carl suddenly sprang to his feet a huge smile on his young face. "I'm going to see how Beth is doing." He announced loudly as he gave Daryl a quick smirk followed by an even faster wink before sprinting off.

Daryl became distinctly aware that they were alone. Everyone was milling about on the outskirts of the rest stop. They all seemed to be avoiding looking towards them. Daryl found himself shifting trying to move away from his leader, his eyes darting towards the triumph.

"Don't." Rick whispered so soft Daryl hoped he'd imagined the words. He shifted again scooting away slightly. Rick shot a dark look at him. "Don't try to run away." The man's eyes softened slightly. "Not now." The pleading note made Daryl want to run away even more regardless of the consequences of his actions. Daryl was in a half crouch ready to dash towards the woods, towards the bike, towards a herd of walkers. Anywhere but here would be a thousand times better. "Daryl." Rick gentle voice made his muscles freeze mid movement. "If you want me to beg I will." He whispered. "Please don't leave. Stay." The heat of Rick's gaze made Daryl's gut twist. He licked his lips eyes darting again to the triumph. Could he make it? "If you can't stand it this much then leave." Rick sighed heavily. "I won't try to force you. I know how you hate to be tied down." Daryl clenched his fist and turned back to Rick.

"Ya don' know anythin' about me." He growled, the pain that clouded Rick's face almost made him regret his words. Almost made him take it back. Almost, but he couldn't bring himself to say anything. The need to continue building a distance between them stilled his tongue.

"No I suppose not I wanted to believe I was starting to figure out the mystery that is Daryl Dixon. But you're right I don't know anything about you. Nothing outside my impressions and gut instinct about you, that apparently I've forced upon you." Rick pressed a hand firmly to his temple. Daryl sighed and pressed his legs up tight against his chest. He kept his gaze firmly on the fire.

"What do ya want Rick?"

"I wanted to talk to you, that's all." He said gently trying not to press the skittish hunter.

"Then talk." The hunter grunted. Rick glanced at Daryl, opening his mouth before sighing heavily.

"Carl seemed happy." Rick evaded picking a topic that he was familiar with, a safe one that posed no danger either emotionally or mentally.

"I guess." Daryl shrugged.

"It was good to see him laugh." Rick smiled thinly. "I was worried he'd forgotten how to smile. Lately he's been so serious. It's hard to see as a parent. To watch the happy child disappear into a cold hard adult." Daryl snuck a look at Rick. The forlorn and almost desperate look in his eyes had Daryl chewing his lips. "Can I ask what you talked about?" He titled his head slightly toward the hunter who looked away quickly.

Daryl wondered what he should say. Should he mention the gleeful look that darkened Carl's face when he talked about killing a walker, or should he say how Carl thought they were a family, that they should stop fighting? Should he mention the fact that he didn't believe Carl's words at all? Because he just couldn't see himself as good enough to be a part of their family. Rick was waiting patiently.

"Yer boy is smart, too smart for his own good." Daryl said finally.

"He is smart. Always has been. He was smarter than most of the kids in his class." Rick agreed, a proud smile crinkling his eyes. "Did he say something to you?" Rick turned his sharp blue eyes on Daryl; he realized Carl wasn't the only smart and cunning member of the Grimes family. "I know he can say some pretty thoughtless things on occasion, he gets moved by passion like his mother." Rick explained. "He didn't mean what he said."

Daryl felt like he'd been blindsided by a metal bat to his face. Then he was right, Rick didn't consider him worthy of being in the group or of being a part of the family. Daryl wished he hadn't let himself get so worked up over Carl's words. If he hadn't allowed the words to build his hopes up, he wouldn't have to feel the crushing agony of them being dashed.

"Yeah I know." Daryl mumbled. Rick stared at him hard, his eyes trying to read deep into his mind. Trying to figure out where the truth was hiding behind Daryl's deep walls of fear, distrust, and shattered self-esteem.

"Unless… You want what he said to be true?" Rick cautiously tested the waters. Slowly trying to draw the hunter out of his shell. When Daryl didn't respond Rick pressed forward gently trying not to scare the hunter away. Daryl felt like Rick was treating him like a wounded animal almost like he expected the man to attack or run away. Daryl bristled slightly but held firm and clenched his hands against the dirty worn material of his jeans. "What did he say?" Rick asked again gently.

"Said we should stop fightin'." Daryl mumbled toeing the ground.

"Did he?" Rick chuckled softly. "I had hoped he wouldn't notice. Sorry you had to be lectured by him." Daryl shrugged.

"It's only natural isn' it?" Ya can' really lecture yer parents. But me? I'm an outsider."

"At the farm Carl said some pretty hurtful things to Carol about…Sophia." Rick sighed weary and exhausted. "Not sure if he ever really apologized to her. Like I said all his mother's passion. He tends to forget to think through his words."

"He's not the only one." Daryl knew he'd hurt more people than he ever helped with his words. He wasn't able to consider others feelings when he was filled with emotions. Shame, anger, pain, and depression makes his tongue like a rattlers bite. By the time he's actually attacked once with his vicious callous words he's actually struck twice. Leaving anyone on the receiving end poisoned and burning with agony.

Rick smiled fondly. "No he isn't." Rick turned his gentle blue eyes onto Daryl. "But I think he's right." Daryl stared resolutely away from Rick trying not to look at the man. "We should stop this." He gestured between them. Daryl wanted to cut in that they already had but he had a feeling that wasn't what Rick was talking about.

"Yer right I'll stay away." Daryl nodded moving to stand, thinking this was the best solution for everything. Rick's quick fingers closed around Daryl's wrist.

"That's not what I meant." Rick sighed. Daryl shook Rick off his eyes dark, looking especially uneasy. "I meant that our fighting has caused tension amongst the group. Surely you've noticed." Daryl shrugged and plopped back onto the ground. He didn't want to admit it but he had noticed the dark cloud around everyone lately. He'd tried to delude himself into believing that it was caused by having no home and less food. But being forced to realize the truth thanks to Rick's unwillingness to back down. Daryl had no choice but to realize how he'd managed to yet again hurt the group and their chances for survival. "Daryl…Please. We need to work this out."

"What do ya want from me Grimes?" Rick's face fell at the use of his last name.

"I want you to tell me what I need to do to fix this." Daryl rolled his eyes and groaned.

"Damn it Rick. Don' ya realize that it's not that easy! I screwed up! Okay?! I messed up, for all of us! It's nothin' for ya to fix." Rick's blue eyes looked desperate and nearly broken. His face dark, Daryl couldn't tell if it was because he was angry at his words or because he was mad he didn't get to say them first. Suddenly Rick's whole body went rigid as he glared at Daryl, the change from pain to anger was so fast it had Daryl recoiling.

"The fact that you still think this is your fault tells me everything I need to know." Rick hissed. "Are you just so self-centered that you've never considered anything else? Or do you just prefer to use this as a reason to keep yourself away from us? From me?" Daryl responded with the only emotion he knew could protect himself with, anger and hostility.

"I think ya had best shut the hell up if ya know what's good for ya Grimes." Daryl growled his eyes slits. Hands already balled into fists.

"No! You're going to listen to me for once. I don't care how much you think this is your fault, it isn't something that rests on just one person alone. You didn't force me into anything so how could you be the only one who's done something wrong?" How could Daryl explain to Rick that it just was his fault. That he was to blame for simply believing he might be worth something more than a one night stand. "Daryl." Rick whispered his name softly dragging the hunter's gaze back to the blue eyed abyss sitting next to him. "I have never blamed you. You know that right?" Daryl clenched his jaw, he didn't know that how could he? He didn't believe his words at all. It might have been the way Rick was talking or maybe the memory of how angry Rick had been that night that made Daryl recoil defensively.

"How the hell was I supposed to know that?!" Daryl shot back viciously. "Ya were so mad after that night in the house!" Rick looked up shocked and his brow creased as Daryl's words sunk in.

"I wasn't mad. Okay I was." He amended after Daryl glared at him. "But not at you. I was mad at myself, the situation, everything but you."

"Ya didn' talk to me for days!"

"You wouldn't let me!" Rick returned his eyes bright. "I was hurt, my pride was hurt." He sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair. "I acted like a child and was too busy thinking about myself and how I felt." Rick stared at Daryl long and hard. "I want to fix this. Not just for the tension, it's causing the group. I want to fix this because I still think that we can make this work."

Daryl bit his lip. His cheeks warm but he knew deep inside that he couldn't trust Rick's words. They couldn't pretend that things could go back to the way they had been. Rick looked haunted for a moment before sighing. "I don't mean we have to continue where we were. I meant we can work together, keep everyone safe again." Rick stared at Daryl his eyes full of trust and hope. "After all there's no one I trust more at my side." Daryl's chest hurt at his words. Rick's eyes widened slightly when he realized what he said. "As my right hand man." He added quickly when he noticed Daryl's face fall.

Rick's smile was still there but the hunter's keen eyes picked up the way his hands were clenched tightly at his side. He knew Rick was lying but couldn't be certain about which thing exactly. Was it because he didn't trust him? Or because he didn't think they could work it out together? The small hopeful voice in his chest whispered that maybe it was because he hoped they could work their way back to the relationship they had before. That light feeling when they had spent time together filled him, the hunter crushed it immediately.

He couldn't afford to let himself believe anything close to the foolish hope. He felt like some dumb love sick school girl. Pretending the guy held the door open because he loved her not because he was being kind. Rick was like that, kind. He wasn't aware of how his actions made others feel. The group looked to him for leadership even if he didn't always realize it.

"I think yer doin' fine without me as yer right hand." Daryl said quickly when he noticed Rick staring at him. Rick's face fell immediately.

"I'd like to have your help anyway." Rick insisted his eyes unwavering. "It feels better to have someone else watching for things I can't. There's no one I trust more than you when it comes to keeping everyone alive. You always have your eyes on the things I don't."

Daryl flushed at Rick's words. He swallowed thickly. He didn't think it was that way at all but he could see the exhaustion in Rick's face. The man had led them single handedly. Daryl realized suddenly that Rick was asking for his help. The man hadn't ever asked for help from the others, not in this way. But Daryl, he was safe. He'd follow Rick's course and keep the group together like Rick wanted. That's why Rick was asking him to help. Because no matter what Daryl wouldn't betray his will. Daryl wasn't sure if he should be happy or depressed by the realization. He was the loyal dog that would never betray it's master. That's why Rick wanted him at his side. Daryl thought for a moment. Did it matter if that's all he was? He'd been treated like shit his whole life, at least a dog had a purpose.

"If ya think that's best." He said finally. Rick's smile reached his eyes as his face lit up.

"So you'll help?" Daryl nodded.

"Yeah. I mean someone needs to make sure ya don' try to feed everyone poisonous berries again." Rick blushed.

"That only happened once." Daryl chuckled.

"Yeah well once would have been enough." Rick smiled broadly at the hunter.

"I'm looking forward to working together again…" Rick held his hand out. "Partner." Daryl smiled despite himself and took Rick's hand.

"Try not to slow me down." They shared a grin and for the first time in days Daryl's chest felt lighter. Things couldn't ever be the way they were before but maybe they could work together again. Cover each other's back and keep everyone alive and together. Daryl stared into the fire, the warmth filling him. He was so focused on it he didn't notice Rick's small smile as he stared longingly at the hunter's profile. Nor did he notice the vicious hateful glare Lori burned into his back. The white wings on Daryl's back just waiting to be ripped into bloody broken shreds.


Chapter 20! Boy it has been a really long time hasn't it! I'm super super sorry about how long it's taken me to finish this chapter! School has been really busy lately. I've been in charge of managing a team and doing a whole script. Lots of work. But I've been working on this in my spare time. So while it may take a while for me to write up each chapter I will keep at it I promise. I love this story too much to just forget about it! Nothing sucks more than being into a story only to have the writer stop right?

Anyway we're finally into season 3! Finally! I won't rehash the episodes since we've all seen them but instead will probably expand on the in-between moments. Thank you to everyone who has favorited, reviewed, and followed this story! You guys are the reason I keep at this no matter what! It means so much to me to have so many people enjoying my work! Hopefully you all enjoy this chapter. (things seem to finally be working out somewhat for our Daryl and Rick huh?)

I hope to see you all in the next chapter which hopefully won't take nearly as long as this one did to finish (so so sorry about that) Let me know what you guys think it always makes me super happy to see people enjoying this! Have a good weekend and I'll see you in chapter 21!