Chapter Ten: Such a Sad Love

Jareth sat languidly before the new statue. His gaze trailed over the intricate detail
that had been worked into the rough stone. Of course, it naturally would be sculpted with
fine detail. The animal had been very much alive a few hours earlier. There was no one to
say that he was necessarily dead, for he was only stone.

Jareth pondered over the perplexing situation for a few more moments. It was
strange to think of rock as being alive. However, how could this Sir Didymus be dead?
Jareth was fairly sure that everything would return to normal once Sarah had brought the
magical orbs to him.

Jareth thought about the one orb he had in his possession. He hadn't even been
able to heal that sickly crystal. How was he ever going to heal the rest of the twelve?
Jareth had refrained from telling Sarah about the other problem that was associated with
her quest. She didn't need to know that he might not even be able to heal the crystals
once she returned them. Knowing this might add to her anxiety. There was also a very
real chance that Sarah would be stuck forever in the dead Underground.

"Have I sentenced her to her death?" Jareth asked himself in a wavering voice.

A cold chill made its way up his spine. He looked out the window and noticed that
the sun had started to set far sooner than it normally did. The days were either speeding
up or the sun was simply confused about what its job entailed. He laughed sarcastically at
the odds that were stacked against him and Sarah.

Jareth silently scolded himself for losing his temper with the girl. She had too
many problems being pushed upon her at once. He shouldn't have ordered her as he had.
Old habits die the hardest, or so he had been told. Perhaps the better way to deal with her
would be as a friend.

"She will think that you are trying to gain her trust," a horrid little voice whispered
in his head.

Jareth cupped his gloved hands over his ears and attempted to will the annoying
voices away from him. However, their ever-pestering sounds lingered deep within his
own soul, further away than he could ever attempt to reach with sheer willpower. Jareth
finally relented and decided to reply, if at last it would purge them from his mind.

"I want her to trust me," Jareth argued bitterly. He glanced around to assure
himself of the fact that no one was near enough to hear his peculiar conversation.

"Why?" the voice asked.

WHY?!? WHY?!? It always came down to that ever present word. Why would
you want her to trust you, Jareth? What would be your reasoning behind that little
scheme? What are you hoping to gain from her trust?

Jareth gritted his teeth against the constant war that enshrouded his thoughts
presently. It was as if a totally different person lived within him, hoping to ruin the
wretched life that he led. This person wanted to keep Jareth a single man, an island so to
speak. Why did this other part want him to be so alone and shun anyone who ever cared
for him?

Jareth's mind wandered back to a time when he had once had someone. He
remembered everything about his sweet companion, especially the cruelty she had endured
from his very hands. He had not loved the woman, but she had offered a friendship that
Jareth would never recognize until it was all too late. He regretted so much of his life,
that it helped to simply forget about all of it and push it beneath a black veil. Jareth smiled
at the thought. The past was something that many people studied, while he wanted to bury
it in oblivion.

"Or perhaps an oubliette," he remarked casually.

"Why?" the voice drifted back to his thoughts.

Jareth leapt from his throne and placed his hands to each side of his head. He
grasped his blonde hair and tightened his hold, until his eyes watered from the pain. Only
then did the horrid voice desist and slink further into the deep nothingness that was his
subconscious.

Jareth took his shaky hands away from his head and slowly opened his eyes. Luck
was with him. No one had happened to wander into the throne room during his lost battle
with self control. It would have been particularly awful if Sarah had seen him in such poor
form. Jareth quickly straightened himself and pulled the wrinkles from his beige shirt that
hung loosely from his thin frame. Jareth stepped before a mirror and cringed back from
his reflection.

"I appear to be more dead than alive," Jareth stated.

His body had the gangly look of someone approaching anorexia. The clothes had
managed to hide his emaciated form, but they would only work for so long. Beneath his
eyes were light purple circles. The lack of sleep had taken its toll as well. Jareth brushed
back his wild blonde hair with one hand. His image was terrifying and he could no longer
dare to look at the mirror.

"I should destroy every filthy mirror in my kingdom. They are no longer of any
use to me. They only allow me to use them a few short times. They are far too fickle for
my likes," Jareth said.

He walked back to his throne and fell into it. Sarah was certainly taking a long
time with her packing. He was shocked at her slowness. He had told her about the
urgency and the haste she would have to use if she ever cared about returning home. He
felt his impatience quickly turn to anger.

"Why must she choose to defy every order I give her?" Jareth asked himself.

This time the peculiar voice was not around to answer his question. It had gone
into hibernation, so to speak, until it decided that Jareth would need another mental
breakdown.

The sweet scent of roses and honeysuckle tantalized Jareth's memory. He
immediately expected to see his dear friend of so long ago. Perhaps she had returned to
assist him with his problem and the destruction that the Underground faced. The image of
her face flashed through his mind. She had been pale, not unlike himself, and her lips were
of a cherry red. She had blonde hair that reached to her waist and shone in the sun like
spun gold. She was slender and had been such a dancer. In fact, she had been the one to
teach Jareth to dance. Jareth laughed as he remembered the times she had bandaged her
feet while he cursed about the horrid pains it was taking to learn the infantile pastime. He
had thought that it wasn't worth his time, but it had been. Jareth had also thought that she
hadn't been worth his time, but she had definitely been. He only wished that he could
make amends for his poor attitude. He had been so young then and never knew how
special she was.

"I was too damned young!" Jareth stated fiercely.

The fates had played a cruel joke on him. They had offered him a companion and
the chance to allow her to live forever, but he had been foolish. He hadn't even gifted her
with magic to control the persistent clocks. Jareth himself could only guess at his age.
There were no calendars in the Underground.

"I cannot even remember her name," he complained.

"Who are you speaking of, Jareth?" Sarah asked.

She had obviously wandered in during his thoughts. Jareth immediately
straightened up and looked over at Sarah. He had to suppress a joyful smile. Jareth had
no idea what the strange emotion was that overcame him whenever Sarah wandered into
view. It had been present for quite a few years, but he still hadn't been able to label it.
Perhaps he never would. All he knew was that he was quite content to gaze at her lovely
face for the time being.

However, Sarah would only take so much of Jareth's strange attitude. She had to
get started and he was only holding her up. Sarah adjusted her pack on her shoulder and
then crossed her arms over her chest. She looked at him sternly, awaiting for him to leave
his trance-like state.

"Are you enjoying taking up my few remaining hours of the day?" Sarah asked
angrily.

Jareth closed his eyes and shook his head. He had to get his priorities straight if he
was to save the magic. Sarah had to leave as soon as possible. Jareth felt a twinge of
sadness pierce the very core of his heart. He realized that he did not want to see her leave.
He wanted her to stay with him, even if it was only for a few short days. But, Jareth also
knew that it would never work. Sarah would never trust him. His own evilness had
destroyed what little trust she had ever had towards him.

"I suppose you must be off on your journey. I take it that you have read through
the poem and observed the map?" Jareth asked. He only wanted to talk without arguing
for a short time they had to share together before she left.

Sarah looked at Jareth closely. She couldn't understand how he had changed
again. He was actually acting concerned towards her. Of course, the Jareth who she
knew was never concerned for anything, but his own well-being. He was selfish! He
probably wanted her to think that he was concerned. Sarah frowned at his conniving
nature.

"Just tell me what you must and let me leave. I have only a very limited time to do
what you have ordered. If I wish to return my friends, I must hurry," she explained in a
slightly harsher tone than she had meant to use.

Jareth's heart burned with an intense jealousy. She wanted to be with a beast, a
dwarf and a fox rather than him, the Goblin King?! It was unheard of. Jareth felt the
strange voice rise back to the surface and push him aside. He was out of control once
again and all he could do was watch helplessly as he jumped to his feet and rushed
towards Sarah.

"I should turn you into stone with your pathetic friends. Or, perhaps, I will force
you to watch them change," Jareth threatened with and evil gleam in his deep blue eyes.

Sarah's mouth dropped open in surprise. His evilness had been thrown at her so
suddenly that she could barely realize what he had said. However, there was no doubt
about the intensity of his threats. She backed up and let her arms slide to her sides. Jareth
was positively the most heartless creature that had ever been forced upon any human
being in the history of the world...of any world!

"How could you?" Sarah demanded.

Jareth smiled. He took great joy in her pains and the way she handled them. She
looked to be near tears. It would be a new experience to actually witness Sarah cry.
Jareth watched her patiently.

Sarah noticed the intent gaze within his eyes and willed her tears to stop. She took
in a few shaky breaths to control her frazzled emotions and then looked back to Jareth.
He seemed to be a bit disappointed with her control. Sarah was utterly shocked that he
had been looking forward to seeing her cry and break down in front of him.

"I'm sure that you would have been the first to run and comfort me, Jareth," Sarah
thought bitterly to herself.

"Sarah, I can do whatever I wish. You must listen to me and do as I say if you
ever want to see your dreary life again," Jareth stated in a simple voice.

He turned from her and sat heavily in his throne. Sarah finally realized the extent
of Jareth's illness. His clothing hung on him and revealed bony collarbones were it dipped
lower. Sarah's eyes widened in concern. Jareth appeared closer to death than to life.
However, her concern was useless, for Jareth didn't deserve anything.

Jareth's eyes closed briefly as if he was contemplating a nap. He touched his
chest with his hand. He was experiencing the pain once again. Jareth felt as if he was
being torn in two by the horrid agony that ripped throughout his body. He could actually
feel the change take place when the evil voice returned to his subconscious and his other
nature resurfaced to gain control once again.

"Perhaps I am being ripped apart," Jareth thought without much concern.

Death seemed like a treat to him. His body was ravaged with a mysterious illness
and the magic was leaving his kingdom to die. His life had been very long, longer than
any mortal could ever hope to live. Perhaps with the death of the Underground his own
end would occur.

"I can't wait for you all day," Sarah replied harshly. She had not yet noticed his
pain.

"Must you be so harsh with me, Sarah? I am not trying to fight with you. Please,
if you have any heart inside your body would you keep quiet for a short while. There is a
viscious headache attacking me at the time," Jareth pleaded.

Sarah placed her pack on the ground and removed her jacket. It had grown warm
suddenly in the castle. She then walked over to Jareth. His words were of such
conflicting natures. At one time he would threaten her and then he would make her feel
like she was the horrid one. Sarah could not begin to understand the extent of Jareth's
problems.

She sat on the ground by his throne, feeling an awful lot like a little kid waiting in
line to sit on Santa's lap, and looked into his pained face. Jareth looked like he had aged
years in the short time between when she had walked in and now. There were lines that
creased his brow in agony and purple splotches beneath his red eyes. Sarah felt horribly
sorry for him, despite her better judgment. No one deserved to suffer so. She placed a
hand on the arm of his throne, very near Jareth's own gloved one.

His gaze trailed down to her. Sarah looked up at him uncertainly. She wasn't sure
what to do. There was no way she could ease his suffering. Jareth made the move for
her. He placed his shaking hand upon hers and squeezed it tightly. Sarah smiled up at
him.

His face gradually lost the agonized appearance and soon returned to normal, or
nearly normal. His deep blue eyes were once again open and friendly. The evil fire was
only a brief shadow deep inside. He stood up and helped Sarah to her feet, still holding
her hand tightly in his own.

"I must leave," Sarah said.

She pulled her hand from his with quite a bit of will power. Jareth's eyes pleaded
with her not to leave, but his mind told him differently. Forcing her to leave, hurt his
heart more than did the strange illness. However, that was the way it had to be. Jareth
edged a bit closer to her and gazed into her deep brown eyes.

"Lovely Sarah, take care and return to me soon. I fear that I don't have much
longer and I want to see you again before I meet my creator," Jareth replied.

This was something Sarah simply couldn't take. Her emotions had been toyed
with for too long. She could no longer deny his intense and caring eyes. The feelings for
him overcame her with a wave of love. Sarah burst into violent tears and fell into Jareth's
arms.

Jareth, startled, supported the weeping Sarah. He allowed her to cry on his
ematiated shoulder. He laid his head against her thick brunette hair and touched it gently.
He could only wish that he had removed his gloves to fully experience its lovely texture.

"Very good, Jareth. Confuse her as much as you want. It helps us greatly. Do
you think you will be able to suppress me? I am so much stronger than you think. You
will not be able to hold back much longer, soon I will conquer you," the voice sounded as
if it came from everywhere, but it had come from within his mind.

His eyes grew wide in horror. He was only helping the evil part of him. Jareth
looked about the room wildly. If she loved him, then she would only be hurt more if he
turned on her suddenly. His mood swings could not be trusted.

Sarah had removed her head from his shoulder and looked up at him with
tearstained eyes. She looked more beautiful than she had ever been before. Jareth's heart
beat wildly in his chest. He simply couldn't hurt her.

"She wants you to kiss her," his mind whispered to him.

No, NO! I will not submit to you! I will do this my way. Leave my mind and my
body! God, Help me to be strong! Jareth cried in silence.

He suddenly pushed Sarah away. She looked at him with shock and hurt. Jareth
only shook his head and then backed away. He couldn't dare to hurt her. She would
never understand his reasons for pushing her away, but he had to. He struck his throne
and nearly fell into it, but he turned and headed towards the door. He paused there and
took in a deep breath.

"Understand, I have my reasons," he answered simply. He then rushed from the
room without a look back to her.

Sarah watched him go with tears in her eyes and anger in her heart. He had played
with her yet again. The man was cold and cruel. Sarah picked up her coat and her sack.
She swung the sack over her shoulder and turned to the large iron doors that served as the
only reasonable exit for the castle. Sarah looked back once and then turned away from
him forever.

* * * * * * * *

In the tallest tower a thin man torn in half by warring emotions saw a young
woman leave his castle. He stayed in the darkness and watched her as she walked away.
He begged her to turn, for if she did, he would run to her and take her in his arms.

"Warnings be damned," he said angrily.

He watched as she walked through the deserted goblin city and through the
massive doors that had once housed an enormous metal knight. It had long been damaged
and never repaired. Jareth watched until Sarah disappeared in the distance. He still stayed
there the rest of the long day, hating his very soul for hurting her so.

"Why?"