A/n: I would like to thank Al May for her wonderful prompts and plot discussions. I would also like to thank everyone who reviewed. Anyways, happy reading.
TWO:
And It Spread Like Bamboo…
"SIR!"
"SIR!"
Ukitake took a sip of the soothing tea. It was cold and strong, just how he liked it. The tea had that smooth nutty aroma he enjoyed, and the coldness helped him relax. The cicada sang loudly, but not as loudly as the screeching of Ukitake's two most loyal squad members.
"SIR!"
"UKITAKE, SIR!"
Great gods, they were causing a riot! He appreciated their enthusiasm, really, he did. Their rivalry ensured that even the most tedious task was fulfilled (when it didn't end in disaster). Yet, it was nearly midnight and they were sprinting towards his quarters, full speed, stretching their vocal cords beyond natural frequency.
Ukitake sighed and braced himself.
The door burst open. Kiyone and Sentarō stumbled through with a loud crash. Literally tripping over one another, they scrambled to their feet, and saluted.
"Sir," Santaro panted. "We hate to bother you like this, but we have some incredibly strange news! Rukia—"
"—she's having a phantom romance!" Kiyone cried.
Ukitakeblinked. He lowered the ceramic cup. "A phantom romance?"
"Yeah," said Santaro. "Matsumoto just told us. She's having an affair with a ghost!"
Kiyone smacked the back of his head. "No, you moron, it means she's having a secret romance!" She rolled her eyes and muttered with disgust, "Men."
Ukitakewas patient, for the sake his subordinates. "This doesn't seem like an emergency," he said.
"Oh, but sir," Kiyone said, "Rukia's doing something strange in the human world—"
"She's secretly getting married—"
"—to Ichigo!"
"But she's already married—"
"—to Ichigo's father! His father!"
"And—"
Ukitake silenced them by holding up his hand. He was tired, and it was much too late for this nonsense. "Do you respect Rukia?"
They frowned, exchanging glances. "Well, of course," Kiyone said.
Sentarō straightened up. "I respect her more."
"No you don't! I—"
"The point is," Ukitake said, "that if you have any respect for Rukia, you will wipe your hands of this idle gossip."
They both blinked. "You don't believe it?"
"Of course not. This doesn't sound anything like Rukia. Consider your source. Was it reliable?"
"Well," Kiyone hesitated. "Matsumoto was a little tipsy but she said Hitsugaya heard—"
"If you didn't hear it from Rukia," Ukitake said quickly, "then please abandon this absurdity."
Although somewhat disappointed, they quickly agreed, and he dismissed them for the evening.
As the sounds of squabbling slowly fading away, Kushiro noticed a member from the fourth division lingering at the door, medical bag in hand. "Is there something the matter?" Ukitake asked.
"I just heard a bunch of noise," the man said, shifting uncomfortably. He glanced over his shoulder, into the darkness. "And with you being sick and all, I thought something was wrong. You're feeling alright?"
"I'm fine tonight, thank you," he said. "There's nothing out of place here."
"We're not far if you need anything."
"Yes, of course."
At last, he was left alone. The cicada's song filled the empty night. Ukitake sighed and returned to his tea.
- - -
The man returned to his house. He was still very troubled by what he had overheard. He set the medical bag down at the door. Then settling down in bed he said to his wife, "He's fine, dear. But I heard the strangest thing."
Beneath the covers, his wife replied, "Tell me about it."
"You know who Rukia Kuchiki is, right? I heard she's a polygamist."
- - -
Hitsugaya stopped in the middle of the street, and mentally prepared himself. "Alright," he said. "Spill it, Matsumoto. Who'd you tell?"
Matsumoto turned on her heal. She marched over to a rose bush, bent over, and admired the lush blossoms. "My, what pretty flowers! They're coming in nicely this year, don't you think?"
"Matsumoto!"
She sighed. "I really did try to keep it a secret," she said, pressing her fingers together and digging the toe of her shoe into the dirt. "But it seems that even one glass of wine will loosen a tight tongue."
Hitsugaya glowered, although he was hardly surprised. "Who did you tell?"
"I seem to have forgotten to fill out some paperwork."
"You always forget to do your paperwork," Hitsugaya snapped. "Who did you tell?"
Matsumoto muttered something.
"What was that?"
"Kiyone and Sentarō!" Matsumoto cried. "I didn't mean to tell them! It's just that they asked me how Rukia was doing and, well, it just sort of slipped."
Hitsugaya took a deep breath. The Kuchiki reputation was screwed. This was bound to cause some unwanted trouble.
"Bamboo," he said, "is a troublesome weed. From a single shoot, bamboo grows wherever it pleases. It can ruin the most beautiful rose garden, and it can even uproot a slab of concrete. That is why the gardener prefers to raise them in pots." He glared at his lieutenant. "You, Matsumoto, have just planted a sprig of bamboo!"
A/n: Yes, I'm done! And so the rumor grows! Review please.
