Heart's Desire Twenty One
Dean headed towards the kitchen area to refill his cup of coffee. It had been two hours since his brother had dozed off, and Dean had kept a close watch. As he entered the kitchen area Bobby's head popped up from the laptop in front of him on the kitchen table.
"How's Sam doing?" Bobby asked as Dean reached the counter and started pouring his third cup of coffee of the morning.
"Okay, he seems to be resting just fine. I haven't noticed a change in breathing, that is the part I'm most worried about." Dean grabbed a chair across from Bobby, ready to take a five minute break from his Sam vigil.
Bobby nodded in agreement. "Dean, I hate the thought of waking the boy, but I was thinking we should probably be taking his blood pressure at least every two hours. I would hate for it to drop suddenly without our knowledge."
Dean sighed, he knew Bobby was right, but dealing with a disoriented Sam wasn't something he was looking forward too.
"Yeah, you're right Bobby, and we should probably keep him eating so that his stomach will stay settled. I just hate the fact that in his wakeful moments under the drug he's so confused." Dean picked up his coffee mug and took a sip of the warm liquid hoping it would help give him the strength to face his brother.
"Hell, don't I know it Dean. Yesterday when I got here, and he was mumbling about losing you… he looked like a lost pup and it broke my heart. But we need to stay vigilant on his care, can't have something sneaking up and biting us in the ass. We just have to suck it up and deal for Sam's sake." Bobby replied as he took his cap off scratching his head and quickly replacing the cap. Dean knew it was a nervous habit and it told him that Bobby was truly worried about Sam.
"Just glad you here to help!" Dean replied as he got up from the table and patted the elder hunter on the shoulder.
Bobby gave Dean a reassuring smile and got up from the table himself. "I'll head over and grab the blood pressure gadget from my duffel."
Dean nodded in understanding and headed back to his brothers bedside. Dean approached the sleeping form that was his brother. His brother always looked so young in sleep. Sam was curled on his left side facing Dean's bed. Dean sat his cup of coffee down on the bedside table that was located between the two beds and sat down on his own bed, waiting for Bobby.
Bobby entered the area quietly and gave Dean a tight smile. "Dean, I think you should go ahead and wake him before we do this. I guess there is a good chance he'd sleep through this, but if he wakes up all confused, it might scare him."
Dean sighed and nodded in agreement. He was working on autopilot now, and was glad to have Bobby there to guide his actions. He slowly rose from his bed and settled next to Sam on his brother's bed. He gently started shaking his brother.
"Sammy, can you wake up for me. Seriously dude, cause I'm tired of talking to Bobby." Dean grinned as he heard a grunt of fake disapproval coming from Bobby. His smile widened with hope as Sam's eyes slowly opened.
"D-Dean, five more minutes please and then I'll get up to do exercises, promise. Just don't tell Dad." Sam replied as he buried his head into the pillow.
Dean's heart skipped a beat. He knew this wasn't going to be easy, but wasn't prepared for a regressed confused Sam. He looked up at Bobby who was equally in shock.
Bobby straightened up from his position on Dean's bed. "Dean, the website said there'd be confusion. His mind's just pulling from a comforting time in his life. It's his way of coping with what has happened. Feel bad for you though cause I 'member how much a pain in the ass he was during the teen years!" Bobby's face lit up in a smile that didn't quite touch his eyes.
Dean swallowed hard and smiled back. He could tell Bobby was putting on a strong front for his benefit, and he decided that he needed to echo that front for Sam's sake.
"Yeah, this is gonna be fun!" Dean shot back at Bobby and continued to tug on his brother.
"D-DEEAN! No, I need to sleep." Sam muffled out from the pillow he was now hiding under.
"Hey Sammy, dude, I'm sorry but you gotta wake up. You're a bit under the weather and I need to take your blood pressure, okay? Dad's not here but Bobby is and you don't wanna make Uncle Bobby mad at you do you?" Dean hated play along with Sam's delusional state but wasn't sure what else to do.
Bobby nodded at Dean and added. "Boy, I don't want to play no games, so quite hiding from me!"
Sam immediately shot up in bed, at the grimace of both Dean and Bobby. "Yes sir."
Dean took in his brother's state, he was clearly disoriented, eyes trying to focus, body swaying.
"Whoa there little brother." Dean quickly grabbed Sam's shoulders steadying him and lowered him against the headboard of the bed. Bobby stood up with Dean's pillows in hand and helped Dean place them behind Sam.
"D-did I take a blow to my head?" Sam asked in a quiet voice.
Dean's stomach clinched. What should he tell Sam? He was relieved when Bobby answered Sam.
"No son, but we had to give you Valium. That's why your head feels funny." Bobby patted Sam's shoulder and settled back on Dean's bed.
"Oh, yeah. I 'member last time, it made me loopy. Sorry you guys are having to deal with me in that state. Sure explains why I can't think straight though." Sam's speech was a bit slow and slurred but definitely understandable.
Dean decided to go with Bobby's line to thought. Tell Sam as much of the truth as he could handle.
"Um, Sam it's no trouble dealing with this. Just sorry I had to give you the drug. We need to take your blood pressure 'cause one of the side effects can be low blood pressure." Dean reached over to the bedside table where Bobby had dropped the cuff and picked it up.
"S'Okay, Dean, I know you had to." Dean flinched at Sam's response. There was so much trust in Sam's voice it made him ache. Dean swallowed down his emotions and smiled at his brother. He unbuttoned Sam's sleeve and started rolling it up.
Dean pulled the cuff up Sam's arm, as his little brother looked at him mesmerized. Under any other circumstances it would've been humorous to watch his brother behave as a stoner, but at this moment it broke Dean's heart.
Dean watched the gage and was relieved to see that Sam's blood pressure was in the normal range. Turning to Bobby he gave him a relieved smile. "It's in the normal range Bobby."
"That's good son. Why don't you write down the time and the results and we'll do this again in two hours." Bobby said handing Dean a pad of paper and pen that was perched on the table between the beds.
Dean took the pad of paper quickly writing the time and Sam's blood pressure, 125-60, not bad. He sat the paper and pen back on the table and began removing the cuff. Sam continued to watch him intently. His head swayed a bit.
"D-Dean, I'm okay right?" Sam was now staring Dean down, and he could see that Sam was starting freak out on him a bit.
"You're fine Sam, just fine. Are you hungry?" Dean hoped that since his brother was acting like a stoner, maybe he'd have the appetite of one.
"Yeah, uh I could eat, but Dean.." Sam stopped and looked down at his hands like they were all the sudden really interesting.
"Sammy, what is it?" Dean watched as his brother began to blush.
"I stink. Really stink. I-I want to shower." Sam looked up at Dean with pleading eyes.
Dean smiled at his brother who now looked like a pleading six year old.
"Sammy, I don't think in your condition that a shower is a good idea." Dean watched as his brother's lower lip started to stick out in a pout. Okay, now he was officially acting like a six year old, and Dean heard a chuckle come out of Bobby.
"I'd like to see you say no to that face Dean! Sammy, stop pouting. I'll whip us all up some lunch, and I bet Dean could help you take at least a bath. I'm with Dean though, no shower, in your condition you'd topple over like a new born calf standing for the first time!" Bobby replied with a big grin in place.
Dean smiled back at Bobby and watched as Sam decided to continue to pout. "B-but I wanna shower."
Dean sighed and responded. "And Bobby and I don't want to deal with picking up your naked butt off the bathroom floor, not on our list of pleasant duties. If you continue to pout about it Sammy, your are just gonna have to stink, 'cause it's a bath or nothing!" Dean's tone was firm and he hoped that Sam would back down.
Sam's quickly replied in his frustrated teen voice. "Fine."
Dean patted his frustrated brother on the knee. "It'll be okay Sam. The tub in the bathroom is a nice size one. You and your sasquatch self should be comfortable."
"Alright, I'll leave you boys to your fun. I'm heading to the kitchen just holler if you need help, but please only as a last resort!" Bobby said as he rose from Dean's bed and headed for the kitchen.
Dean grabbed Sammy's chin in his right hand and spoke. "You with me Sammy?" Sam nodded in response, his eyes still all over the place.
"Okay, you're staying here in bed. I'm going to run some water for you and I'll be right back, okay?" Dean asked hoping that his brother comprehended what he said.
"'kay. I won't go anywhere. Promise." Sam was nodding even as Dean held his head. Dean patted Sam's cheek.
"Good boy Sam. I'll be back in a second." Dean rose from the bed and headed for the bathroom.
oooOOOooo
Sam sat in bed, watching his brother head to the bathroom. He kept repeating his new mantra. Stay in bed, over and over. It was hard to keep thoughts in his head. It was hard to think. His mind wondered and he remembered that Dean had said he'd given him Valium, and he knew that was why he was so out of it. The thing that puzzled him was why Dean had given him the drug. He didn't think he was hurt and even if he was after the first time he took Valium his brother knew better than to give it to him. He meant to ask Dean why, but that question kept leaving him. His knew mantra was why- why- why.
He watched his brother approach the bed and Sam was proud of himself for remembering his question.
"Why Dean?" Sam asked and watched as his brother's face screwed up in confusion.
"Why what Sammy?" Dean asked in a soft tone, a tone Sam was used to hearing when he was ill or hurt.
Sam had been so happy he had remembered his question but now he forgot why he was asking why. Damn it!
Sam started to pout again. "I forgot, sorry Dean."
Dean gave him a reassuring smile. "No problem Sammy, you'll think of it again, and you can ask me then."
Sam smiled, Dean was a genius, over course he'll ask him later. Sam felt much better. "'kay Dean."
"You still ready for a bath?" Dean asked as he sat on the edge of Sam's bed.
"Oh yeah, 'cause I stink." Sam remembered that. He slowly pulled the covers back and swung his legs around until his feet touched the ground.
Dean quickly put his arm around Sam's waist and helped him stand up. Sam was grateful to have his brother to lean on because the minute he stood, his head began to swim. They slowly made their way to the bathroom.
A bothering thought crossed his mind as they reached the bathroom. "Dean, I'm a big boy and I don't want you bathing me. I don't want to be naked in front of you if we can help it please."
Every since they had grown up, Sam didn't mind Dean's help when he needed it, but being bathed by his brother would be too embarrassing.
"Got it worked out Sammy. I'm gonna help you undress, without looking- promise and the tub is full of bubble bath so you can keep your modesty. I'm gonna stay in case you need me, but I won't be able to see anything. Which I gotta say is a bonus for me too." Dean opened the door to the bathroom and Sam felt himself slowly being lowered on top of the toilet seat.
"Dean, bubble baths are for girls!" Sam couldn't believe how embarrassed his brother was making him feel.
"Suck it up Samantha you'll be fine. In your condition, it's the best solution. Besides you're the one complaining you stink and I think the bubble bath is supposed to make you smell like roses or something fruity, so you won't stink anymore." Dean was tugging on his t-shirt and Sam knew that it would do him no good to argue anymore.
"Fine." Sam was sure his brother would never let him live this moment down.
He heard Dean chuckle as his t-shirt was tossed to the floor. "Okay Sammy, I don't want you to stand yet but do you think you can tug off your boxers while sitting? I'll turn my back and you tell me when you're done okay?" Sam nodded and watched as his brother turned his back.
It wasn't easy but after a bit of struggle his boxers were at his ankles. Sam slowly lifted each foot out of each leg hole and sighed. "Ready Dean."
Sam smiled as his brother turned back around with his eyes closed, hands extended. Sam grasped each of Dean's hands with his own and they slowly moved over to the bath tub. Sam slowly pulled one leg and then the other over the side of the tug and descended into the warm soothing water, letting go of his brother's hands and letting out a sigh.
"Dean, where did you get the bubble bath?" Sam eyes full of confusion.
Dean sighed, "Well evidently old man Johnson that we're renting the cabin must have a thing for bubble bath. He had three different kinds lined up along the side of the tub."
"Oh." Sam replied.
"Yeah, that's was my thought too." Dean smiled and sat down on the toilet lid watching him.
"I'm okay Dean, really. You can go, I'll let you know when I'm done." Sam replied content in the warmth of the bath.
"Um no Stoned Wonder Boy. You might decide to take a swim or get out on your own. I'm staying." Dean crossed his arms over his chest with a sigh.
Sam echoed the sigh. "Fine."
oooOOOooo
Dean's afternoon was full of dealing with Sam, and his own emotions about Sam. Part of him felt guilt, not only because of the fact that Sam's condition was caused by him, but also because Sam's immature actions made him ache for the time in their lives when Sam was truly his "younger" brother and he got to take care of him. And damn, if that's not what got him into this trouble in the first place. His damned "heart's desire."
Getting his brother bathed had been a chore in itself, and once he got Sam back to bed, the kid was struggling to stay awake. Bobby was frustrated by this, he'd spent the time fixing Sam a sandwich and salad only to have Sam drink a glass of Sprite and pass out.
Dean was taking a Sammy break in the kitchen picking at his own lunch, when Bobby brought him out of his musings.
"Boy, you'd better eat the food in front of you. I worked my ass off being a domestic goddess for you boys, only for you to ignore the food I fixed. I can't kick Sam's ass right now, but I sure can kick yours so eat!" Bobby's voice was gruff, but Dean could detect the underlining concern.
"Sorry Bobby, just thinking about Sam. He's just so out of it, and it's all my fault." Dean took a quick bite of his sandwich to please Bobby.
Bobby's tone softened as he spoke. "Dean, I think Sam's doing great. He hasn't thrown up since last night, his color is good, his vitals are strong. Considering the circumstances, the boy is doing good. He's just a bit loopy and loopy I can deal with. Look at it this way Dean, lots of material to kid him about later." Bobby gave Dean a reassuring smile.
"Um no material there, 'cause first of all I caused loopy Sam and secondly, he has better material on me." Dean gave Bobby a sheepish look.
"So what could you have done to top, singing jingle bells over and over while taking a bubble bath?" Bobby chuckled and looked Dean for an answer.
"Uh, I shaved him every morning, and to top that, I cut his food up for him and sometimes fed him. You know can't be too careful with dangerous forks!" Dean felt his cheeks flush pink as he looked away from Bobby's amused stare.
"Oh Dean, once this is all over and we all have time to reflect, you're in for it!" Bobby chuckled loudly.
Dean nodded in agreement. "Uh yeah, Sam is gonna let me have it."
Dean thought that maybe just maybe with time that this whole thing could become a big joke, but he some how doubted it.
AN: Thanks again to all the wonderful reviews and support I've gotten for this story. I couldn't have done it without my beta, sendintheclowns. I did a silly thing. I reviewed my own story by mistake! In reality, I was trying to review Dawn N's story- Stay- Summary: Set in Season 3. Sam falls ill suddenly and Dean struggles to cope because he can't help his brother out of this one. This is an excellent story and I strongly recommend it. Sorry about my slip up!
