I don't really like this chapter, but whatever.


For the first couple days, the only time Aku wasn't crying was when she was asleep.

Chiyono had carried her through the small, surprisingly opulent palace—considering the relative unimportance of the former owner—to a bed deep inside, carefully laid her on the silky-soft surface. She barely noticed the texture though. She was in too much heat and pain to really feel anything else. Anything besides her misery, that is. She had heard of deaths before, of course, what with the war and all. But she had never lost anyone she had actually known. When she thought she would never joke around with Meiri again, that she would never talk with Hokumi long into the night again, when she thought of them suffering and dying for her sake… It was all her fault. If she hadn't chosen them to serve her, they would still be alive. They wouldn't have died so horribly. And not only that—visions of the dead from the battle she had passed on the way out kept swimming before her eyes. She couldn't help thinking there were people who mourned them, just as she mourned Meiri and Hokumi.

She couldn't stop crying.

The only thing that made these days even somewhat tolerable was Chiyono. She never left Aku's side. Aku was too busy crying to actually hold any sort of conversation, but she still appreciated that Chiyono was there. Every minute of the day, Chiyono was in bed with her, holding her, stroking her hair, her face. Kissing her face everywhere but the forehead—she had quickly learned that lesson. Aku thought it miraculous that Chiyono was so patient with her. That was probably something especially rare in humans, considering how short a time they had known each other.

On the fourth day, when Aku woke up, she felt she could finally speak. Her throat was strained by sobs, exhaustion, and dehydration—she still hadn't managed to eat or drink anything—but she felt she could manage it. "Chiyono." She opened her eyes to find Chiyono lying next to her, fully dressed, deep in sleep. "Wake up, Chiyono." That didn't seem to be enough, so Aku tried to lift her hand. It took all the strength she had, but she did it. She slowly, shakily moved her hand to Chiyono's face, resting it on her cheek. The drop in effort made her sigh with relief. She ran her thumb over Chiyono's cheek, across her slightly-cracked lips. She was beautiful.

Chiyono let out a small, sleepy moan. Her eyes flickered open. "Aku," she muttered. "You're not crying. Do you feel better now?"

With a slight, sad smile, she said, "No. But I guess I've gotten used to it."

"Ah. Are you still in pain?"

Aku paused a moment to evaluate. Yes, the heat and the stabbing were still there. But they had lessened somewhat. So she said, "Yes, but it's getting better."

With a relieved-sounding sigh, Chiyono said, "Good. I was really starting to worry there."

"Hmm." Aku took a breath, as deep as she could. It hurt, of course, but she still felt the need to. "Chiyono."

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry. And thank you"

Chiyono frowned at her from under her hand. "Sorry and thanks for what?"

"Making you worry so much this last month. Being such a wreck these last few days. And thanks for staying with me."

Chiyono gave a sort of combination laugh/sigh. "You're adorable, you know that."

"Hee."

"No, really." Chiyono lifted a hand, put it on Aku's, gently rubbing her knuckles with a thumb. "You grow on people very fast, you know. Even after just those few days. I couldn't just let you out of my life. Even though this is weird for me."

Aku frowned. "Weird how?"

"Well, see, in Yamato, homosexuality is seen as...not exactly a sin, but not exactly appropriate either."

"Huh. Strange."

Chiyono flickered out a smile at her. "I could see how someone from this world would think that. Lots of things are weird about this world. Women don't menstruate, for one. I haven't either, actually, which really surprised me."

"What's menstruate?"

"Never you mind that. But anyway. When I first started having feelings for women a few years ago, I was really...confused, and a little mad at myself. I've gotten better about it, but it's still weird for me."

"Hmm." Aku thought on that for a while. Yamato must be a very strange place. She wouldn't want to live there. Then she thought, "Have you ever been with a woman before?"

Suddenly looking a little flustered, Chiyono said, "Um, no. I've always been too, um, unsure of myself. That back in my apartment was my first kiss, actually."

"Those were much more than one kiss."

Chiyono laughed a little. "Yes, I guess."

After a moment of staring into each other's eyes, Aku twisted her face into a smile. She was aiming for teasing, but she wasn't sure how close she got in her condition. "We'll have to remedy that someday. When I'm recovered."

Chiyono laughed again, but she looked a little nervous. That was okay. She could be nervous for the both of them, because Aku was surprisingly not anxious at all. "Okay."

"I can't move," she said after another moment.

"Huh?"

"Kiss me."

Chiyono laughed again. And did. It hurt, but that was okay. Definitely worth it.

That day, Aku managed to eat and drink a little. Not very much, but a little. The servant who brought her her meal was none other than Youyou—apparently, Touke had found her. She hoped to bring Youyou back to Soufuu as her maidservant, though she was a little hesitant. What if Youyou ended up being murdered too? The thought left her conflicted, and she couldn't make her decision yet. She spent some time that day talking with Chiyono and Youyou, until she got too tired and had to go back to sleep.

When she woke up the next day, she felt a little better. The pain and heat had sharply declined, though she was still very weak and exhausted just from consciousness. She was determined to recover faster than she had the previous times she had been bloodsick, so she decided to take steps to force herself into action. She asked Chiyono to help her stand up. But she couldn't contribute to the effort at all. She was returned to bed, a little frustrated with herself.

Chiyono's sweet, gentle kisses made her feel much better. Light, slow kisses just on the surface. Aku must be recovering, as she decided that that wasn't enough today. When Chiyono came in again, Aku licked her bottom lip. Chiyono drew in a gasp, backed away, opened her eyes. She met Aku's, though obviously with some difficulty. She bit on her lip a little. Aku wanted to be doing that. "I've, um, never done this before…"

"That's okay. I'll teach you."

"Okay." A little hesitantly, she leaned in to kiss again. Slowly, gradually with each contact, their mouths opened. For a long while, Aku didn't breach the gap. When she finally got tired of caution, she lightly touched Chiyono's tongue with hers.

The reaction was instant. Chiyono let out a gasp with the faintest twinge of a moan. Aku recalled that, for some reason, humans found her completely delicious. Which was completely alright with her. Suddenly their positions were reversed, Chiyono's tongue crossing into Aku. She was still slow and gentle, much kinder than Aku could recall Touke ever being. She tasted Aku, tongue rubbing against hers in an entrancing rhythm and Aku soon completely lost track of her surroundings. All there was was Chiyono, her movement and warmth, her hand on Aku's cheek, thumb still gently caressing.

So lost was Aku, she wasn't entirely sure when Chiyono had moved to above her, straddling Aku a little above her waist. That wasn't exactly something Aku would complain about. Chiyono's hands ran over her—face, neck, through her hair, across her shoulders—gentle and feather-light. Though Aku couldn't stand, she had almost regained complete control of her arms. Her hands crawled away from Chiyono's face, down her neck, down her sides, switching around to her back. Chiyono's breath hitched slightly as she moved lower, lower, down her hips, down her legs. Yes, she had guessed right: Chiyono's robe—since she spent most of the day in bed, she had decided to dress as lightly as Aku—had hitched up above her knees when Chiyono had straddled her. She slipped her fingers under the silk, meeting Chiyono's skin. She slid up again, under the cloth, across skin that was so smooth it was almost as glass, save for the warmth and how it gave under the slight pressure of her fingertips. Sliding up, up. Chiyono's breath quickened.

When she got to Chiyono's hips, she apparently decided that wasn't fast enough. She broke the kiss, leaned back, grabbed the hem of her robe, and started pulling it up. Aku's downward gaze caught a glimpse of—

"Aku? Are you awake?" Touke.

Chiyono scrambled off the bed, and was suddenly standing to the side, frantically straightening her clothes, her face brilliant red. Damn. Worst timing ever. Aku took a few moments to collect her own breathing before calling toward the door, "Yes, I'm here."

Touke swept into the room in the usual dramatic fashion, in silks much more casual than her attendants would usually let her wear. She must be on her way to the capitol—she dressed down when traveling. "Are you—" She glanced between Aku and Chiyono, and quickly put the signs together. "I suppose you are recovering. Did I come at a bad time? I can leave…"

Clearly realizing Touke had guessed what had been happening only moments ago, Chiyono's face went even redder. But Aku just smiled at her and said, "No, that's fine. The moment is gone anyway."

"Sorry." Then Touke hesitated a moment. This worried Aku. Long ago, Touke had hesitated with everything, been very uncertain. But now she was absolutely confident. Whenever she hesitated, it signaled bad things. "There's someone I would like you to meet, before we head for Soufuu."

She could see where this was going. She took a breath to prepare herself. "Oh?"

Touke took her own breath. "My consort, along with his children."

"Children?" said Aku with a frown. "Since when did you want children?"

A sad sort of smile spread on Touke's face. "Since forever."

Huh. Aku had never known. Whoops. "Oh. Send them in, I guess."

Again, Touke hesitated, but only for a second. She turned to the door, and called, "Kikkan? You can come in now."

Rather than a man, the first person through the door was a young girl. She couldn't be older than nine. She had brilliant orange hair, and huge red eyes. She charged through the room, toward the bed. It was obvious she was intending to leap onto it, but Touke snapped a hand out and caught her by the shoulder. "No, Miyou."

Finding herself smiling, Aku said, "It's okay."

When released, the girl immediately hopped onto the bed. She crawled on her hands and knees up toward Aku, stopped nearby. "Hi! I'm Miyou."

"Hello, Miyou. I'm Aku."

With a big, energetic smile, the girl said, "You're the Taiho, aren't you?"

"Yes, I am."

"You're pretty!"

Aku let out a slight laugh. It hurt a little. "So are you, little girl."

"Good afternoon, Taiho," came a deep, masculine voice. Aku looked up to find a man standing just inside the doorway. The first thing Aku noticed was the shining white hair, and for an absurd, fear-fueled moment, she thought it was the governor. Then she noticed the more muscular frame, the purplish eyes. The voice was different too, more resonant. He was carrying a child who was probably younger than two, with hair a similar color to the man's eyes, looking around curiously.

She sighed, which also hurt. From Aku, who was very small, soft, and feminine, to this Kikkan, who was very muscular, hard, and masculine. They couldn't look more different. Maybe Aku had never been what Touke really wanted. Or maybe people could like entirely different sorts depending on sex. She wouldn't know, really. Oh well. "Hello, Kikkan."

"Are you well? Touke told me everything that happened. If you're not up to it, we can—"

"No, it's fine. The surgeon did good work on me." That first day, Aku's personal doctor had had to patch her up a bit, fixing the damage the torture had done. She was on drugs to suppress the pain left over from the surgery, but it didn't seem to do anything to the pain from the blood sickness. "I'm recovering."

The girl, Miyou, asked, "What's a surgeon?"

Kikkan opened his mouth to answer, but Aku got to it first. "They cut people up and play with their insides."

A look of horror crossed the small girl's face. "Oh no! Are you okay?"

"Of course I am. It takes more than that to hurt a tensen, you know." Aku gave her a little wink.

The girl giggled, then said, "Daddy says my new Mommy is going to make me a sennin." Aku glanced up at Touke. Making a girl this young a sennin seemed unnecessary cruel. But then Miyou said, "When I'm old enough." Oh, okay, good. "What's being a sennin like?"

"You never grow older, and you never get sick. You won't die from hunger or thirst."

"If it's that nice, more people should be sennin."

Aku kind of agreed. If she could, she would make the whole world sennin. Aku turned to the man, and asked, "What's the boy's name?" At least she was pretty sure that was a boy.

"Shou, but Miyou first started calling him Gikki, and it kind of stuck. Do you want to—"

Aku could see where that question was going, asking if she wanted to hold him. He was beyond his infancy, but even if he were still a baby, "I'm too weak."

"We can just do this." Kikkan walked around the bed to the side Chiyono was standing on. He gave her a nod on the way, then set the child down at Aku's side. Gikki immediately crawled over, and promptly started playing with her mane, making some kind of sound Aku couldn't interpret. The fact that it wasn't translated meant it was probably nonsense.

But, somehow understanding, Miyou inched closer, ran a hand through Aku's mane. "Ooh, it is soft. It's so nice."

"I'm a Kirin, you know," Aku said in her teasing voice. "We're meant to be nice."

"Ooh, ooh, can I see you in your Kirin form?"

"Someday, yes. I'm too weak to shift right now." It did take a considerable amount of energy to switch back and forth, and if Aku couldn't even stand, she was sure she wouldn't be able to shed her artificial skin, no matter how forced upon her it was. Then she suddenly remembered herself. "Oh, I'm sorry. This is Mononobe no Chiyono, my consort."

Kikkan gave her a double take at the word consort, but he said nothing on it. He gave Chiyono a little bow, and said, "It is a pleasure to meet you." Kikkan's overly polite speech was starting to annoy her a little. She was kind of doing it herself, so she shouldn't complain too much.

Chiyono bowed back, and said something similar.

"Your name is unusual."

Chiyono hesitated, so Aku said, "She's a kaikyaku."

Obviously not sure what to think about that, Kikkan just said, "Ah."

They talked for a while, about this and that. Aku felt somewhat uncomfortable talking to this man who had stolen Touke from her, but she dealt with it. He seemed good enough of a man, so she didn't feel too bad. Of course, no one would ever be good enough for Touke, not even herself, but there wasn't anything she could do about that. If he was who Touke wanted, she supposed that meant he would have to be good enough, at least in Touke's opinion. He was intelligent, and surprisingly compassionate for a soldier, so he would just have to do. Chiyono didn't contribute to the conversation at all, but she could be quiet sometimes around others. Especially people much higher on the social ladder than herself. She probably hadn't quite realized her importance as Aku's consort, but that was okay.

At some point, Gikki had curled up against her side and fallen asleep. Miyou was laying by her side as well, but she was still playing with Aku's mane. A while ago, she had started braiding. The feeling had been incredibly unpleasant, so Aku had had to ask her to stop. Miyou still seemed perfectly content just running her fingers through it. During a short silence, Aku decided to say to Kikkan, "You have a beautiful family."

"We have a beautiful family." At first, Aku thought Touke was reminding her that Touke was a member now, but then she said, "You're a part of it."

Aku's eyes snapped up to her. "What?"

"Um…" Touke suddenly looked a little uncomfortable. "If you can, uh, put our past behind us, I would like you to… I would like you to, if you can, think of me as a sister. Or cousin, whichever feels more appropriate. Chiyono, too," Touke added with a glance at her. "So, then, Miyou and Gikki would be your niece and nephew."

Aku glanced down at them. Then she looked at Touke, Kikkan. She realized the blurring of her vision meant there were tears in her eyes. She said, her voice croaking slightly, "I've never had a family before. I mean, not really. There's Enrin and the other Kirin and the nyosen, but we aren't really family. Most Kirin don't have the capacity for that kind of emotion, and the nyosen were more servants, I guess."

"Well, if you can. I'll understand if you can't."

Aku blinked, trying to clear her vision. "I'll try," she decided after a moment.

"Auntie Taiho!" shouted Miyou, suddenly clamping herself to Aku's side. The sudden movement shot agony through her, and she let out a pained hiss involuntarily.

"Miyou, be careful. You're hurting the Taiho."

"It's okay, Kikkan." Still trying not to cry, Aku gestured to Chiyono with her hand on the nearer side. Chiyono stepped closer, and Aku took her hand, gripped it. After a moment she turned it around, kissed the palm of her hand. "It's okay."

It would all be okay.

She had a family.

She couldn't hold it back anymore. She cried. She had been an emotional wreck these last couple days, but that's what happened when the world handed one agonizing cruelty and one beautiful kindness in such quick succession. She couldn't stop the tears.


Kikkan: 仡侃 (this is an azana)

Miyou: (the child is young, and no one has chosen kanji)

Shou: 命

Gikki: (again, no kanji yet)