Today is the day. As I stand in front of the old mirror in my mother's bedroom, taking in each hem on my sky blue bridal dress, I cannot help but continue to wish things had been different for me.

I wished that my family belonged to a different sect of the church. I have a cousin a state over who got to choose her husband, and he her. Why did I have to grow up in a community that takes the decision away from us? I mean, I was baptized at sixteen like all the rest; I am a full member of the church. How can I not have been allowed to choose my partner?

When I was a little girl, I went to town with my mother. We went into a store so my mother could buy fabric, but we went down an aisle full of books. Now for me, that was magical, because the only books I ever got to see were the Bible and the Ordnung. Mother even let me pick one out.

It was a little book but I treasured it. When I learned to read I savored every word. I always wanted to be like the girl in the book—marry an amazing man during the wedding of my dreams, and live happily ever after. Now, even then I knew I could never have a wedding like the girl in the book, it just wasn't done in the church, but I at least wanted the man.

But now, now I would not get a single thing. Not the wedding, not the man, and definitely not the happily ever after. I guess I will just have to get over it all, and deal with my life as it comes now.

Taking a deep breath, I donned the black prayer shawl over my usual white cap, then bowed my head for a quick prayer for a miracle. Then, knowing I had no other options, I left the room to meet my parents on the porch.

My good friend, Alice would be my only newehocker during the ceremony. I did not have very many other friends beside her, but it did not bother me. She would already be waiting at the church, like my…fiancé and his family.

"There you are Bella, I thought you were going to make us late," my mother chided me as she looked me over, then straightened my apron, finding fault as she always seemed to do.

"I'm sorry mother," I responded softly, letting her do as she pleased. I'm sure she was stressed; after all, we spent all of yesterday cooking for the banquet tonight, and then there was the business of hosting.

"Let us go then," suggested my father, putting his black felt hat on his head.

And with that we left the house, ending my life as I knew it. By the end of this day I would be Mrs. James Schwartz.

I was terrified.


A/N: Hey all! Sorry for the long interlude in postings, but real life got hectic for me the last week or so! But I'm back to it and anticipate posting again in the next couple of days! So stay tuned! And if you could, leave me a review and let me know what you think so far! I have a twist coming so I'd love to hear what y'all are thinking! PS:

The next chapter is going to be intense, possibly M rated for a number of reasons so... ;) check back often!