A/N: I would like to thank all my wonderful reviewers and reassure them that things will be alright. I'm not saying anymore. I would also love to thank Kit for proofing this chapter and giving me excellent insight. I know my grammer sucks and I've never been good at it.
Finding Her Muse
A light pink and airy dress was on the lady and her hair was braided in an elaborate fashion. She walked to him and gave an unreadable look. Looking on at the fallen girl she felt nothing other than jealousy and hatred. She needn't feel those emotions any longer though.
"You left me for her? A human?" Phona smirked and looked back to the grief stricken prince,
She had never felt this way before. It was intense simple to say. It was like marking territory and reclaiming it for her own. She did not see the broken man before her. What she saw was someone who was deceived by life and by the world. What he thought he had was not real and never could be.
The woman that lie on the pedestal was a symbol of what the dear prince thought he could have, wished he could have. It was not meant to be. A union between them would never suffice. From what she had heard, this girl was sister to Aragorn and therefore was in the weakest of bloodlines. No one would approve of such a thing.
Why did such a noble prince surrender his hopes and dreams into one life that was not at all befitting to him? Could he not see that everything the woman had to offer could be found within her and a lot more? Phona had to poke and prod in the right direction and if it took years to persuade the prince to look the other way, she would spend years doing just that.
In contrast to the way she died, being engulfed by darkness, where she ended up was the complete opposite. It was a place she has been before where the sun shined brilliantly and the meadows were scattered with glowing flowers. It was a place that held complete tranquility. Amara had not ended in the darkest of places.
She rested by a pond, not asleep and not at peace, though the atmosphere gave off much of it. Inside she was hurting. Everyone she left behind haunted her. She wanted and needed to be back. It was not her time.
How long she had been there she did not know. Time did not exist when one is basking in what they could have done differently to avoid outcomes. All she knew was that the place she was in had eternal sunshine for it never got dark. Amara knew where she was, she just waited for him to show himself. She sat up and sighed.
Was she to spend the rest of time sitting here?
Look into the water.
Amara looked around, her eyes darting in every direction. There was no source for the voice, yet she had heard the voice before.
"Aule? Where are you?" She called softly.
Look into the water.
Never minding her curiosity to where the voice cam from, she obeyed and peered into the pond she had been laying by. At first she saw nothing, just blue, but then the water began to ripple. She knew that she was not looking into the lake just for the heck of it. Something was going to be shown to her and indeed something was.
"Tell me you will take great care of her."
The voice that echoed through Amara's ears was scared. She watched as the woman surveyed the crowd standing around her bed.
"You have our word," one of them said. Another came up and took the child from the woman.
It was her mother. She knew it. She felt it in her very bones. A certain chill went through her that was uncontrollable. Her mother, the image of her mother was right before her eyes. To her it was shocking; for it was the first time she had ever seen her mother.
Before she had time to question it, the scene before her eyes changed to when she was little. Her hair was pulled up into two pigtails and she was playing with her small genius chemistry set. She remembered that moment. Just as she was about to pour a green substance into a beaker, her father had walked in.
"What are you doing squirt?"
Amara watched as the younger version of herself looked up through her small glasses with hot pink frames.
"I'm trying to see if I can change the molecules-"
"Never mind that squirt." Her father picked her up and walked from the room. On his way out, he knocked over her chemistry set.
"Come see what you mom is doing." He carried her into the bathroom and there was her mother, standing in front of the mirror applying hot red lipstick to her thin lips.
"This is much better than boring ol' molecules. It's what little girls love."
Her father's voice faded out along with his image, wiped away by the ripples in the water. Images of herself as an awkward teenager passed her eyes. Amara wondered why she was being shown these images. For the briefest of moments she closed her eyes and when she opened them she only wished she could close them once more.
There was Legolas and he was sitting in a lavish white bed, pillows everywhere. He was dressed in equally white garments and a smile was on his face. In his arms was a woman, very fair and richly garbed. Amara felt her heart splitting.
"I had told him to go on." She reminded herself but could not help but think that what she was being shown was not real. Legolas was in the fellowship. He wouldn't be resting with another so quickly after her death.
Would he?
The pond cleared and she blinked. She felt even more miserable.
"That was a brief glimpse of your life, well the important parts."
To that familiar voice she stood and turned around to find Aule behind her. His face was a lot more serious now than it had been before. He seemed to be glowing even brighter.
"The last vision isn't true is it?"
"It will be if you could to linger here."
"What do you mean? I died."
"Yes, yes I am aware of that." Aule began pacing, his hands behind his back.
Why did you-"
"Be quiet!" He thundered and as he did the air around them went wild. The wind began kicking up, tossing her hair everywhere. The sun was quickly over shadowed by black clouds. The atmosphere had quickly ran from peaceful. Aule turned towards her as he stopped pacing.
Fear ran through Amara and she found that she couldn't move a muscle.
"Do you know how incredibly disappointed I am in y you? Not to mention the rest of the Valar." He continued pacing and Amara could do nothing but watch.
She was speechless to say the least. She knew that she had not done the best she could have done and because of that had repeatably beaten herself over it but there was only so much she could do.
"The self doubt you have, it must stop now. The problem is or was that you kept telling yourself that you had to be strong but your will kept folding. I am telling you now that it has to end."
She knew that she had let down someone she just felt even worse that it was Aule, the one who had granted her the gift.
"The very reason I allowed you the gift of feeling emotions you have forgotten and that is your innocence. You were caught up in trying to please everyone that it clouded your mind." Aule stopped his pacing and face towards the lake.
"I showed you those images because you needed to see them."
The clouds went away, lifting the darkness from the sky and the wind subsided. Amara let out a breath she was holding in.
"The woman you saw, your mother gave you up at birth. Did you think she was not frightened? She gave you up to keep you safe from harm. You need to honor her memory."
Amara dropped her head and walked next to Aule. "I'm sorry that I disappointed you."
Aule sighed, "I am not yet finished with what I have to say." The birds that had once stopped chirping when things had tensed had now started up again.
"The people who cared for you all those years made you to be the person that you are today. Even though you did not amount to be what they wanted, in return they pushed you away. They are important in your life, even now. It was why I showed you them."
Amara frowned. Her caretakers for all those years upset her and made her feel so small. She was never good enough off them but she had to agree that they did make her who she was.
"What about Legolas? What you showed me was it-" She looked up at him.
"No, although it is what is to come should you not find yourself and leave your weaknesses behind. Legolas will never be truly happy without you, that is if he does not let grief over come him."
"So are you saying that I am going to be brought to life?" Hints of confusion were sprinkled through her voice.
Aule turned his deep stare to her. "Can you recall the dreams you once had before Legolas came to you?"
Amara thought for a minute but it did not take long to remember. How could she forget the dream she had that came true?
"Yes."
"There was one part of your dream that never came true. You were looking through water and-"
"And I was an elf."
"That part is about to come true." Aule smiled.
"Legolas, please, you must forget about her or you will die." Phona felt that she could not stress this enough. She was on her knees, he arms wrapped around Legolas' own arm. He was staring at Amara's body as if in a trance. He couldn't believe that she showed up and he dared not believe that she was confronting him here and now.
"We both know that you did not truly love her."
Legolas' heart sunk even lower within himself and at that point he freed his arm from Phona and looked at her sternly.
"Return to Mirkwood with me. There everything can be worked out."
"Why are you here?" His voice held nothing which troubled Phona.
"After I received the letter you wrote I could no longer stay. I came to Lorien. When I got word of your arrival you can not imagine what I felt."
"Feel no longer Phona. I do not love you."
If it was possible, Phona scooted even closer to Legolas. "Say no such thing. Legolas, you are coming back to Mirkwood with me. Your father will be thrilled-"
Legolas groaned. "Can you not see that there is much more to the world than yourself? Have you stopped to notice that all of Middle Earth is in jeopardy? Phona, I do not wish to be bothered by you or anyone else right now."
Phona bit her lip and furrowed her brow. "I think you are letting your emotions for this human cloud your mind."
If looks could kill, the look Legolas gave Phona sure would have.
She rose to her feet. Looking down upon the broken elf she said to him that she would give him time. Again, Legolas was left alone with the dead Amara. The bright aura every elf possessed no longer glowed around the prince of Mirkwood. The grief he was feeling has now gone beyond tears. He stayed by Amara's broken form until the sun rose.
On the shore stood the fellowship. Having been rested and well fed, strength that was once diminished had now returned to them. They each stood still in a line as elves advanced upon them and draped cloaks around their shoulders. The material was light but warm. Though really a small gesture of a gift, it would really prove to come in handy.
A touch of numbness pricked Legolas as he stood in line with the rest of the fellowship. The morning air was crisp and cold. It was certain that the fellowship must move out. The enemy was gaining way and gaining way fast.
Before the fellowship departed, Galadriel had more gifts to dispense. Much more aid was to be needed on this journey and she would not turn down a chance in helping. She stepped first to Legolas and sensed the prince's sadness. This time she decided to over look it. She turned to the servant who followed her baring the gifts, and took the bow from him.
"My gift for you, Legolas, is a bow of the Galadhrim, worthy of the skill of our woodland kin."
For the briefest of moments the elf almost forgot about his heartache for Amara as he accepted the bow from Galadriel. It was quite an honor to receive such a gift from the Lady of Lothlorien. He was speechless.
Legolas, dear prince of Mirkwood, do not lose hope. Nothing is ever really set in stone.
Legolas looked from his bow to Galadriel as he heard her powerful voice entered his mind.
You and Amara shall meet once more, until then, follow what she has asked of you.
Legolas nodded, not able to say any words.
What the lady had said to him he did not understand. Nothing is ever really set in stone, what had that meant? Galadriel only smiled to him and moved to Merry and Pippin.
"These are daggers of the Noldorin..."
From afar Phona stood and watched a few other elves pack up the boats for departure. She spotted Legolas with a deep scowl on his face. Pieces of her felt that the prince had broken away from her, but she could not accept that what he had seen in her he no longer saw. She watched as his lithe form began to aid in the packing process. No, she couldn't believe that she no longer held his heart.
Legolas felt a pair of eyes on him. He packed what was the last parcel away and stood turning around. In a distance was Phona, he eyes locked on him. He went over to her and Phona strode over to him and they meant in the middle.
"You are leaving with them." She stated more than asked.
"I am apart of the fellowship." It was clear that Legolas did not want to carry a conversation with Phona. Phona didn't notice.
"So what? Why not leave the fellowship and accompany me back to Mirkwood?"
"You fail to understand that I no longer have feelings for you." His voice was a dead and distant whisper.
"Well then," Phona said stepping up. "If you say you no longer have feelings for me, kiss me and then tell me you do not."
Legolas couldn't believe that she asked this of him. In the first time in his life he began to have horrible thoughts of a woman.
"I do not need to kiss you to know that I am not in love with you." Legolas turned to go claim his boat. "Good bye Phona. Send my re guards to my father."
Boats loaded, the fellowship climbed in. Boromir, glad to get away from Lothlorien shared his boat with Merry and Pippin. Aragorn shared his with both Sam and Frodo. Legolas took the paddle to his boat; Gimli was in the front reminiscing about his gift from Galadriel.
She watched them sail off with a bright smile on her face. The lady extended her hand to them, wishing them well silently. As they sailed and she could no longer see them, the smile disappeared from her face like a slate being wiped clean. The lady dropped her arm, picking up the skirt to her white dress and hurried off. She moved with silent speed through the lands she watched over until she came upon her husband standing over Amara's body.
"She has not yet woken," Celeborn answered Galadriel's unspoken question.
"The fellowship is well on their way. The enemy is heading for Lothlorien for two reasons and one of them is still here."
"There is nothing we can do about it. She is still in the hands of the Valar." Celeborn turned from the young woman's body to look at Galadriel. They had not had a serious orc attack in decades.
"I will tell Haldir to ready the army."
Galadriel said nothing and Celeborn left her. Galadriel moved closed to the pedestal in which Amara's body lay. She touched the dead girl's cheek and felt a bit of warmth. It wouldn't be too long.
An army great in size of unnatural creatures, tromped through the forest. Each step the creatures took they came closer and closer to their destination. Rough steps and no care for the nature around them made the Uruk-hai far from sneaky. With the wicked words embedded in their heads, they feared nothing and took whatever they wanted. On their way they were to get the empath and the ring.
Galadriel watched and waited until finally Amara rose from the pedestal, chest heaving up and down. With her left hand she squeezed her right arm. The jolt her body was feeling was obviously too much at one time. She shut her eyes to cope.
"I know it is hard but you must not fight it."
Amara's blood boiled. Her heart pumped at immeasurable speeds. She felt the comforting hand on her back but did not really notice it. There was a hum in her ears but the image of a woman similar to herself came into her mind. Her smiling image alone made everything stop like nothing had happened. Being dead for twenty four hours plus she had to gain her bearings.
As she stood from the pedestal, Galadriel stood aside and watched the woman. There was a radiant glow to her and as she studied her surroundings, Galadriel saw the change in the girl. Everything Amara had been through she knew and had seen through the mirror. The woman was going through the most important time in her life and the path she took only would get rougher.
"A-Am I an elf?" Amara did not wait for Galadriel to answer before she felt her ears. They were perfectly fine and round. She turned to look at Galadriel.
"You're Lady Galadriel aren't you?"
"We have not much time to talk, but yes I am." Galadriel placed her hand behind Amara and guided her towards where the maids placed Amara's things.
"What you saw in your dream about becoming an elf was naught but symbolism."
"So I possess the qualities if an elf."
"Precisely."
Galadriel led her up a flight of stairs. Not knowing where she was heading, she let the lady guide her completely. They entered a room and on a bed neatly laid out was everything Amara owned plus more. Clothing, a new pack, various small daggers...
"You must dress and leave immediately. The enemy is coming and it is crucial that you reach the fellowship while you still can."
The empath stripped herself of the white dress she wore and put on the brown tunic and leggings that was lain out for her. Unlike her old clothes, these fit quite snugly.
"You can not be seen," Galadriel explained.
Amara found a white ribbon on the vanity and quickly put her hair into a pony tail. There was a fierce look to her face. She was ready to face whatever was to come. She walked back to the bed, grabbed her pack and begun stuffing it with clothing, old and new Galadriel had provided her with.
"Be aware of your surroundings." Galadriel watched her immensely. Even though she was now lacing up her boots, she knew the girl was listening.
Amara stood and shouldered her pack. The sword Arwen had given her she placed around her waist and the daggers, three of them, she placed two, one in each boot and the other in her belt. She turned to look at her guitar. This time she couldn't afford to bring her old acoustic. The journey would be fast and her guitar would only slow her down.
"I will keep it in great care until you return."
"Amara turned to face Galadriel."Thank you for everything."
The lady smiled.
The Lady of Lothlorien saw the empath off among the shore. Amara was to travel by foot along the coast. With the speed of an elf, she raced along the woods, feeling out the fellowship. Her hair flew behind her and her steps couldn't be heard. She flew like a ghost and dodges trees in her way with ease.
The darkness would no longer claim her and knowing that brought her much more confidence. As Aule had explained it, there was just too much darkness in one place for her human body. By gracing her with elven qualities, she stood a chance and essentially became more stronger. She was the balance between this war, goods advantage point. This time she would not disappoint Aule or any of the other Valar.
Credit though could not just be given to the elven qualities she now possessed. What Aule had shown her helped to pull her out of the rut she had been in. To see what could happen and what had happened sparked something in her. As she ran she thought of her mother and how brave she had been. Through it all, her husband dying, fleeing to Rivendell, giving her only daughter up at birth, she had kept her wits.
That was her motivation.
