Chapter 6

'Good morning, Miss Oswald.'

He stood there, a glint in his eye that no one could see except her. Trying to act like everything was normal, she replied sophisticatedly like a normal teacher.

'Morning, Eleven.'

He settled into his chair at the front, next to Twelve and Nine. She had been fairly amused when she had found out that Eleven's friend were all named after numbers. She had no idea why. He looked up at her as she started teaching, a glowing smile on his face and a sparkle in his eyes that she couldn't bear. He was staring at her with such adoration she could hardly look at him. Focusing instead on the task at hand she collapsed into her chair and started marking. She couldn't see him, but she was sure he wasn't doing the work. Instead, he was still staring at her, but simultaneously looking troubled.

'Get on with you're work.' She told him in a teacherly manner. Yet his arms fidgeted against the table until he grabbed his sheet and walked up to her desk. Standing at the very edge he pointed at his paper, not even an ink scratch on it, telling her he didn't understand.

'What don't you understand?'

He leaned in a little closer and her breath got shaky. There were at least forty other students and she couldn't be seen like this.

'What happened, the other night,' he whispered, his hands pressed flat to her desk and her eyes blazing straight through her soul. That intense gaze was one she hadn't encountered on his face before, 'that wasn't nothing, was it? It did actually happen, and you reciprocated and-'

'Can we not...talk about that.' She pursed her lips. 'We're in a class with thirty or forty other students in here, we're not alone this time. And I don't want to talk about it anyway. What happened actually happened.'

'But you enjoyed it? You don't regret it?'

A small smile was hard to resist.

'Of course I don't regret it. I just don't feel comfortable talking about it right now. We can save the conversation til later, okay? But for now, to put you're mind at ease, so you can get on with you're work,' she emphasised, raising her eyebrows, 'it was never nothing to me.'

She flicked her pen at him, gesturing to his discarded seat.

'Now go, and get on with the work.'

By the glimmer in his smile and the way he turned back he had gotten the answer he was looking for. Tapping the pen rhythmically on her desk she looked up to see his shoulders hunched over his work, writing aptly. Those tuitions were really, really paying off.

•••••

When he sat down in his chair, Twelve's curiosity got the better of him.

'You're getting friendlier and friendlier with her.' He commented, as he laid his guitar protectively to the ground and took off his jacket.

'Well, yeah, I've had after hours tuition, so I am a bit friendlier with her.' He replied innocently.

Eleven kept his cool throughout the rest of the lesson, after he had confronted Miss Oswald. He had felt the following eyes of his friends boring into him as he had leant even closer toward the English teacher.

'Forget friends.' Twelve said afterwards, as they all walked toward art.

'You looked like you were about to snog the fuck out of her!' Ten added, saying the very thing that was going through everyone's minds. Eleven blushed a little but defended what he knew was false.

'Guys, I wasn't going to kiss her, come on. That's ridiculous.'

'No, you were asking her for a fuck instead.' Twelve deadpanned.

Eleven joked with them on the subject, joining in with the banter that Twelve so hated until he was sure they had confidence that the notion was absurd. He just needed to keep them away from drawing closer to the truth. In all honesty he was quite scared of how they would react if they knew. Anyway, he was anticipating tonight when he saw her again, and actually quite nervous now from what had happened last week. She had told him she didn't regret it but did that also mean she wanted to hang onto it? Or would she apologise for everything and tell him it was too inappropriate? All through his remaining classes and dinner he was contemplating this, going over all possible situations in his head. Finally, he made his way to her classroom, pathetically checking his appearance in a mirror before entering. He saw her hanging over her desk, sorting out things and her hair falling like a beautiful waterfall so her face was concealed. He closed the door behind him quite ominously, as they usually left it ajar. She looked up at him as he started forward and smiled, almost sadly. Oh shit. His mind was racing, and a lump got stuck in his throat.

'Are you okay, miss?' He asked, as usual.

'Fine.' Her tone was normal, if a little clipped.

At this point he would draw up a chair and sit down opposite her, the desk between them. Yet he kept standing, and looked at her, waiting for her to say something. She didn't even make contact.

'Did you mean what you said?' He broke the silence.

She acted obliviously to him, and Eleven grew impatient. He took hold of her hand as it passed through the air, soft and smooth, caressing it lightly. She finally looked up at him with her overwhelming chocolate brown eyes, and he stared softly back, waiting for an answer.

'Yes.' She told him.

'What are you thinking?' He asked, moving as close as he could to her, fingers sliding further up her arm, and she averted her eyes from him.

'I'm confused. Confused about it all. It keeps debating in my head. I'm not sure what to do. But I know that it was something I will never forget. I'm just not sure it would work. I wish it could. But a teacher and a student-' she bit her lip, leaving her sentence open.

'I don't want things to go back to normal because of it. It was the best moment of my life-'

'Don't say that. It can't be, it's just me. The whole experience of university should be the highlight of you're life, not some silly little kiss.'

Her comment had hurt him a little, and he could see she knew this as she looked him in the eye.

'Silly little kiss?' He questioned.

She sighed, 'I don't know, Eleven! I don't know, my minds conflicted. I want one thing, but my mind's telling me another. If anyone found out about us I would be out of this job, and I don't want to lose it.'

'I understand, but-'

'No, you don't understand!' She took her hand away from his, 'You really, really do not understand.' She laughed bitterly.

A deliberating pause ensued, and then he walked round the side of the desk and toward her, shamelessly taking her in his arms. Accepting his embrace, she closed her eyes, leaning against his chest.

'I want to, believe me. You don't know how much I want to, Eleven, it kills me inside. It's been only two months since I met you and yet I feel completely torn.'

His thumbs slowly stroked her back and he kissed her head.

'But whenever this might happen, when it's just you and me...I know that caught up in the moment I can't resist it, but when I have time to actually think about it, the fact I'm you're teacher, it...it's intimidating and reckless and I know it's wrong. But then when I'm in you're arms, like this...' She drew away, staring into his eyes, 'I know it feels right. Before any of this happened I had accepted that that was the case, that it would never develop to anything more, despite my wishful thinking. I'm just split, split between one decision and another.'

'I know there are insecurities,' he stepped closer, 'I know it might not work. But it's a risk I would be more than happy to take. You don't know how many times I think of you, how many times I want it to become more.'

'You can't take a risk that would get you kicked out of university! Not for me, not for anyone, do you understand? No matter how entangled this gets, I am making sure you get on with you're education and don't waste it. You have such a bright future ahead of you. I'm sure when you leave you'll forget all about me.'

'I don't think I could ever forget you.'

'Me neither.'

'And I still want to do this. I still want to hold you in my arms, no matter if people find out.'

'This tuition alias won't last long, Eleven, and you know it.'

He hung his head.

'Please. Reconsider, don't act on what you're mind tells you. Listen to you're heart.' A chill ran down her spine as he placed his hand exactly over her very heart, pacing away under his palm.

She nodded slowly, and then tenderly reached up to enclose her lips with his and wrap her arms around his neck. This time it was soft and gentle, reassuring and filled with possibility, albeit questions. Her fingers played with his floppy hair that hung in his eyes, rubbing it between forefinger and thumb.

'What did you're heart tell you?'

'I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.'

He opened his eyes to watch her, a curious expression on his face.

'Jane Austen?' He raised a faint eyebrow.

She laughed. 'Jane Austen.' She confirmed.

Her fingers wrapped round his and played with them childishly.

'Come back next week. I'll try not to think too much about the cons.'

'I hope not.'

His hand cupped her cheek, and he realised that everything he saw before him was everything he wanted. It wasn't just a flippant emotion or thought; it was one that empowered his very soul. He couldn't tell if she felt the same way, but she kissed him once more, one that left his lips tingling from her touch.

'You should go. It's getting dark.'

'Do I have to?'

'Yes!'

She gave him an endearing look.

'Go on.'

'It's almost like you don't want me here.'

'I do!' She said, wrapping arms around his middle. 'But I told you, I don't want you to get into trouble for wandering around corridors.'

'Its only six o'clock, everyone's still up.'

'Yes, and I have to go home.' She picked up her bag and slung it round her shoulder. Eleven couldn't tear his eyes away from the alluring sight.

'Home?'

'Yes, home, with a mortgage, hundreds of bills, MOT for a motorbike and a car. Adult things you don't even have yet.'

'Seven years isn't a huge age gap.'

'I know, but it is when you consider a relationship.'

'Age doesn't matter. At least to me.'

'It doesn't matter to me either, but unfortunately I can't say the same for the rest of the world. If we had met differently, Eleven, I swear, I wouldn't even have had to consider it. Fact is, I'm you're English teacher, and you will have to actually act like my student during classes. No wonder I'm nervous that people keep getting suspicious.'

'They're not-'

'I heard what Twelve said, I'm not stupid.'

'Don't argue right now. This is not the way to say goodbye.'

She sighed, putting on her biker jacket. Eleven couldn't help but take in a sharp intake of breath.

'Sorry.'

'No, it's okay-'

'No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry...' She muttered, hugging him again. 'I just have a lot of things going on, what with the work and you and life in general. Come on, I'll let you out.'

He followed her to the door, where she turned the lights off and locked the door.

'You don't need to walk me to my bike!' She laughed.

He smiled in return. The night was cool but unsettled, leaves blowing in the wind, spiralling down like beautiful tornados until they reached the ground. It was one of the things he liked about December.

He watched her climb on her bike and put on her helmet, a marvel that could have just been one of his dreams.

His hair whipped wildly in the wind, despite the fact he was not cold, even without a jacket.

'Goodnight, Eleven.'

Kissing her on the cheek he replied, 'Goodnight, Miss Oswald.'

She revved up the engine and drove away into the night, like a bird in flight. The moonlight had illuminated the pathway she had driven and he lingered there a moment longer. If she was to be Elizabeth Bennett, then he would try to be her Mr. Darcy.