Chapter 16
Green, the color of envy and her eyes
Lily came down the stairs that morning to see Emma laying on the bed with Mary Margaret. They weren't spooning, but Emma was snoring softly, serene. Mary Margaret lay curled on her side, her face tucked closer in towards the pillow. Lily fixed herself a glass of chocolate milk and stared at the wild curly blonde hair of her... girlfriend?
Lily wasn't sure what she wanted. Of course, she always wanted Emma, always and forever. She and Lily had made a pact as teens to always be there for each other, no matter what. For the first time though, Lily felt like something was pulling her away from what their life once was. Things could never be the same again. Lily had spent the last week mulling things over.
Emma had a son now. Emma had a son she wasn't willing to leave anytime soon. Emma had a son that believed in fantasies the same way that their would-be friend August did. He read the very same book that the writer had left behind for him in Storybrooke. Lily was inclined to believe what the book said was true, and she had had some time to read the heavy volume with Henry.
She scanned the pages for some sign of herself in the stories. Her hopes were dashed when she found none. Emma, the Savior, of course was written about and her parents Prince Charming and Snow were heavily featured. Seeing their pictures in the illustrations made her scrutinize them with hard eyes.
If what Henry said was true (and she believed him) then Emma was laying in bed with her mother right now. Her mother was trapped in a life where she was doomed never to know her own daughter laying next to her, her husband married to another.
Although she and Emma were behaving more like lovers again, Lily couldn't suppress the gnawing feeling growing in her heart. Bitterness lurked in the darkest corners of her mind. She couldn't deny any longer that Emma was dragging her down by not believing in their true cause.
Lily had always been on a mission to find their missing parents. Emma had the gall not to care if they found them, and yet here she was, the one reunited! Emma was too distracted by this son of hers in this crazy town to notice let alone believe what she had.
She was blind to the fact that she had finally found her parents, even if they were cursed and it was hard to swallow. Lily couldn't help but feel angry and cheated. First, August left them, and now she was left with no clues whatsoever? Where was her happy ending? Where were her parents?
Emma didn't seem to notice her plight. She didn't care about finding her parents anymore because she was trying to be one. Lily wasn't interested in being Henry's kind of step-mom, however. She didn't want to be anyone's anything, stuck in this town. She was growing antsy in the strange little town, waiting around for a man that might never return.
Lily needed to go and find August. She needed him so that they could find the man who could help them find their parents. Perhaps the man could possibly use her magic wand to assist them. Lily loved Emma, but she couldn't stay put when there weren't any answers about her own parents forthcoming.
What she demanded in life was some answers,and in order to get them, she had to keep moving. She had to face the truth. Emma didn't share her passion any longer. Their lives were starting to diverge down different paths, and Emma didn't seem willing to follow Lily where she must go.
Emma and Mary Margaret stirred. They all decided to go to the local coffee shop for a change and get their morning pastries. Mary Margaret bought a blueberry scone, Lily a cinnamon bun, and Emma a chocolate chip chocolate muffin the size of a small planet. They settled in at a booth near the window where the sun was shining.
"What happened with David?" Lily asked tentatively once they were all comfortable. Emma flashed a warning look her way, but Lily persisted. Damn if she hurt Mary Margaret's feelings, she was interested to know, because something wicked in her wanted to hear the gossip.
Mary Margaret stirred her coffee with a frown, her eyes peering down into the milky drink. "I went to meet him last night, and when I got there, he told me he's cured of his amnesia. He remembers everything now."
Emma's hand shot out to cover Mary Margaret's in a comforting squeeze. Lily didn't miss the action, but Emma was so focused on the school teacher's tale of woe she didn't notice Lily bristling beside her. Mary Margaret was emptying sugar packets into her coffee and missed the look of envy consumed on Lily's face, also. "He said even though he does have feelings for me, it's only right that he give things another chance with his wife," Mary Margaret tearfully said, sobbing out the last words.
"Who needs him, huh? He's not all he's cracked up to be, you know?" Lily tried to dismiss her friend's feelings. Emma frowned, but agreed with her girlfriend. "You can't blame him, it's not like he chose to get his memories back all of a sudden," Emma said to the school marm. "You guys knew this could happen."
"Shit happens sometimes," Lily said in an off-hand manner. Emma handed the school teacher a wad of napkins from the dispenser on the table to wipe her tears. "Why do I get the feeling we should be having this conversation over stronger drinks?" Emma asked the two.
She leaned with her elbows on the table and asked them if they wanted to go and blow off some steam at the local bar later on that night. Emma hadn't stirred up any trouble of her own in the town thus far, and hadn't been drinking very much at all. She figured helping a friend drown her woes for a night was the least of her problems.
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After breakfast, Emma headed to the station and Mary Margaret went in the direction of the school. Lily drove off in the bug from the station after dropping off Emma to go back to the apartment. Once there, as she often did when she was alone, she went into their bathroom upstairs and removed her hidden wand.
She sat down hard on she and Emma's shared bed with a heavy sigh. The wand was curled protectively in her hands, and she stared down at it contemplatively. She was due at the diner for work in a couple hours. Would anyone even notice if she didn't go in?
Lily didn't belong in this town any longer. She wanted to be forgotten, to be gone in a poof so fast no one would notice until she was already gone. It would give her longer to find August before Emma came looking for her, if she did. That was a big if.
She didn't care if it was fool hardy to go looking for August. His mysterious absence might mean he was dead, but perhaps not. Answers in life could not be found if they were not sought out first. Lily had to know where he was and why he had abandoned them. She had to know if he could really help her like he claimed.
Lily made her decision. She packed her meager belongings and added a few framed pictures of Emma and herself among her things. She grabbed the yellow bug's keys off the dining room table. The swan key chain dangled from her grasp as she dropped a folded note onto the table in their place.
She closed the front door behind her with a heavy heart and leaned against it. Her head fell back against the door with a dull thud, and tears were swimming in her brown eyes. She and Emma would just have to part ways, and she just had to hope that they would find each other again. She couldn't be part of Emma's journey anymore. At least not for now.
What a familiar scene, Lily thought as she stared into the rear view mirror of the bug. Her heart was racing. Her knuckles were white on the steering wheel as she clutched it for dear life, speeding away from the little town. She could see it getting smaller and smaller in the rear view, and it filled her with nostalgia how many times she and Emma had sped away from other places in their past just like this. Only this time, she was missing her partner in crime.
She knew Emma would never have gone with her, not without Henry. And she knew Regina would stop at anything from letting that happen, so Lily made the only decision that benefited her. She left town without asking, without leaving a trace of a hint that she might be leaving. Emma and she had always been experts at it. She hoped that Emma could forgive her one day.
Emma would just have to understand her burning desire to learn her own origins. Lily couldn't afford to sit around waiting for some man that might never come back. She had to get on with her life. Anything was better than watching Emma get closer to her parents while she was left always to yearn for her own.
Lily was determined to keep unraveling the tale that was her life. This decision might destroy her, but she would rise from the ashes of one life to begin a new one like the legendary phoenix. She would keep on searching until she found what she was looking for.
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Emma got off work that night, and made sure to text Lily and Mary Margaret. She asked Mary Margaret to skip volunteering, and the school teacher, who would have normally protested, simply texted back 'K.' Lily didn't respond. Emma got a ride home from the station with Sheriff Graham, and she waved to him as he took off down the block.
Emma didn't expect Lily to be at the apartment. She was supposed to be at work. No one had called to inform her Lily never made it to her shift. The blonde didn't notice the white note on the dining room table. She went straight to the bathroom to take a shower to get ready for the night. When Mary Margaret came home, they would go together to pick up Lily and Ruby and head to the Rabbit's Hole.
Emma left the shower feeling relaxed and at ease. When she opened the closet door, she didn't notice that Lily's things were missing right away. She simply chose a red quarter length sleeve top that hugged her waist and highlighted her bust and pulled it on. She brushed her hair to a shiny finish and applied bright red lipstick to her lips. She wore skin tight, dark denim jeans and brown boots to complete her ensemble.
Mary Margaret's car appeared in the driveway, and she came in carrying the mail. She was about to toss it all on the table to open later, when she noticed the note on the table. She opened it curiously, and immediately wished she hadn't.
Dear Emma,
I'm glad that you found your parents, but I hope you understand that I have to keep searching for mine. I have to go now, and I understand that you have to stay. I promise though that we will see each other again. I love you.
-Lily
"Emma?"
The school teacher called out to her room mate, and Emma came down the stairs. "Yeah, what's up?" she asked, walking up to Mary Margaret. She raised an eyebrow curiously when she saw the letter in Mary Margaret's hand. "What's that?" she asked.
"Here, it's for you," she said, extending the letter to the blonde. Emma looked questioningly at her troubled expression, and looked down at the page. Her face registered shock, and then a hard, flinty look came over her jade green eyes as she read. She had done it again. Lily had left without her.
Emma swore, and threw the letter down. She was too pissed to cry, even though she was hurt. Where did Lily get off, saying "glad you found your parents"? Emma internally scoffed. As if Lily believed what Henry said, that the woman they were living with was her mother! It was absurd, even if she found herself wondering about it more than any sane person should.
It was definitely crazy! Emma let out a frustrated growl and sat down at the dining room table. Mary Margaret approached her from behind, and gave her tense shoulders a gentle squeeze. "I understand if you want to cancel our outing," she softly said, offering the blonde a small mercy.
Emma laughed bitterly aloud. "As if! I need a drink more than ever now," the blonde said determinedly. Mary Margaret could see it was useless to stop her, and was glad she wouldn't be the only one crying over her beer that night.
"Alright, I'll get ready and we'll go," the school teacher said.
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An hour later, the girls had arrived at the Rabbit's Hole bar. It was a Friday night, and some of the less respectable denizens of Storybrooke had the same idea to blow off steam. Sheriff Graham was among them, and he was seated on a tall bar stool eyeing the front door when Emma, Mary Margaret, and Ruby straggled in.
The three women found a tall table near the dance floor, and the low lights and pulsating bass of the music had them wired for the evening. Ruby ordered a round of shots and was dressed to the nines as usual. Her long dark hair was swept over her shoulders and she wore a small, sequined black dress that came mid thigh on her long legged self. Her calves looked killer in her spikey black heels, and she was definitely looking to go home with someone tonight.
Secretly, she wasn't the only one. Mary Margaret downed her shot of tequila and bit down on a lime, and when she pulled it away she noticed Dr. Whale standing across the bar. He hadn't noticed her yet, and she desperately hoped that she could catch his eye. She preened her hair a little. She needed a reason to forget David's rejection,if only for one night.
Mary Margaret was wearing a white dress that tapered in at the waist and flared out above a tight white mini skirt. On her back, there was an open space that formed a heart and it was very cute from behind coupled with her hair cut. She wore blue, pointy shoes and carried a small, matching blue clutch. There were pearls around her throat and on her earrings.
The school teacher and Emma approached the bar after Ruby caught Victor the mechanic's eye. She joined him on the dance floor, and Emma and Mary Margaret ordered cocktails at the bar.
As they took a seat, they noticed Graham at the other end of the bar. They raised their glasses at him in greeting, but he didn't move to join them. He was still ashamed that Emma had caught him sneaking out of Regina's so he kept his distance.
The women passed some time at the bar, and eventually Graham noticed Dr. Whale approaching the two. The doctor only had eyes for Mary Margaret, and Graham could tell by the pink of her cheeks that she was more than interested in him. He watched as Emma excused herself and headed to the ladies room.
Graham had had one too many. He was sitting at the bar feeling sorry for himself when they came in. He had decided to come to the bar tonight because Emma had mentioned that's where she was going. It made him feel like a lovesick puppy dog, following her about with no chance in the world.
What made him believe he had no chance? Besides being rebuffed many times, Graham had gotten to know Emma a little over her time at the police station. He saw how often she came and went from the station with her girlfriend, that Lily.
He had seen the two lovers share a few kisses over the last couple of weeks and his stomach knotted up at the prospect. He was filled with bitter resentment at the image. He was unbelievably turned on and yet pissed simultaneously.
He was upset because of her refusal, and more importantly, her reason for rejecting him left him at a loss. How could he blame her for not being into him when she was clearly into women? Graham felt awash with desperation, grief, and confusion about his feelings for the blonde.
That was what compelled him to follow her out into the night when she left the bar. They could both tell that the other two girls were getting lucky tonight, and that left Emma the odd man out.
She was resigned to this fact as she made her way home, and Graham trailed behind her a short way. He told himself he was only looking out for her since she was unstable on her feet, wobbling a little as she walked.
"Graham?" Emma called, looking over her shoulder. She had suddenly noticed she wasn't alone on the street, and thought to look behind her even in her inebriated state.
She came to a stop and tucked her hands into her pants pockets, waiting for the Sheriff to catch up. She was willing to forgive him in this state. She was feeling lonely, leaving the other two girls behind at the bar, and missing Lily already.
The wind blew her blonde hair, and Graham advanced on her and looked at her with longing in his dark blue eyes. He tugged her into an alley nearby, and she drunkenly followed him, thinking he just wanted to talk, maybe explain himself for lying to her.
When he turned around though, he was suddenly pinning her against a cement wall and invading her personal space unmistakably. He loomed over her, and Emma stood rooted to the spot as his lips crashed down against hers, stealing a taste of forbidden fruit not afforded to him.
"What the hell?" Emma sputtered. She shoved him off, but in the moment before she pushed him away, his kiss had felt strong and insistent, skilled. That pause was a moment too long, as fate would have it. The pair had no idea Mayor Mills was sitting in her car across the street, and her eyes were narrowed to slits of rage.
A/N: Aw, shit! What will the mayor do?! Stay tuned for more :) (It's not what you think :P) My heart broke writing Lily leaving, just fyi. Please leave any constructive criticism or encouragement in the form of a review, I would be eternally grateful.
