14. Reality Illumi
He had been struck completely unawares. It knocked him slightly to the side and he released her, raising his hand reflexively to his face. It certainly wasn't strong enough to hurt, but why had she done it? She was still sitting on the floor, leaning away from him, aura incandescent with anger and…fear? Well he had almost asphyxiated her. She must have thought he had done so deliberately.
"I'm sorry. I didn't remember."
"You didn't remember? Didn't remember what? Your pride? Your sense of decency?"
What did she mean by that? "I forgot how much longer we Zaoldyecks can hold our breath than other people."
"How long you can hold your breath? Well as far as I'm concerned, you can hold your breath until your face turns blue, you…you…molester!"
Now he didn't understand at all. "I don't understand."
"Molester…one who molests. Like you were doing to me just now!"
"I was doing what you asked me to do." He was starting to get a bad feeling about this.
"How Can You Say That?" She stood up. She was shouting, "You try to intimidate me! You scare me half to death! I pass out, and when I come to, you are on top of me like some kind of Boa Constrictor!"
A very bad feeling. He stood as well. "That wasn't what happened."
"The Hell it wasn't. Get Out! Get out before I call the guards!"
There was plenty of color in her face now. Although the room was becoming quite dark, he could see her face was almost livid. So much indignation directed at him, completely undeserved. "I'm not leaving until I discuss with you the reason why I came here. Your life may be in danger. You need a bodyguard. I am available. Hire me." He couldn't wait any longer.
"I'm not discussing anything with you! I don't want you anywhere near my body. What kind of a man takes advantage of an unconscious woman like that?"
He was getting angry now. "You were not unconscious." But when he got angry, he became calmer, and his voice got softer.
"Of course I was unconscious, I don't remember a thing!" She, on the other hand, was still yelling.
"If that were true, then I would think you would want to shut up and find out what happened."
"You can't talk to me like that!"
"You told me to kiss you."
"In your dreams!"
Actually, that was true. She had done that in some of his dreams. "You grabbed me and pulled me down."
"Ack! I don't want to hear any more! Couldn't you see I wasn't myself? Maybe I thought you were someone else!"
"You called me by my name."
"I thought you were something ELSE! A fantasy, a dream…"
That was a surprise. She fantasized about him? But making this admission appeared to make her angrier than ever, and she continued.
"Get out of here. I don't want to talk to you. You're not a man; you're a monster. A murderer and a coward! Taking advantage of a groggy woman is probably the only way a Zaoldyeck would EVER get a normal woman!"
That was it. He hit her with Nen. Her angry face was now frozen in a rictus of terror. What was he doing? Why had he come here at a foolish personal risk? This was pointless. This plan had been flawed, poorly crafted. And he had executed it badly. It wasn't going to work. Not only would she not contract with him as a bodyguard, she would never want to see him again. He would return to Kukuru Mountain and in a day or two there could be an assignment for him. So although she would never see him again, there was every chance he would see her. And then the woman he had just held in his arms would die at his hand.
He released her from his aura and she crumpled to the floor, weeping, hiding her face in her hands. He had failed. Once again he had that hated feeling that came on those rare but terrible occasions when he had not been quick enough, or clever enough, or strong enough and something had gone wrong and he was to blame. He sighed and crouched down beside her. "Lucia, I'm leaving now. I'm sorry the man didn't measure up to the fantasy."
Her arms shot out and went around his neck as she buried her face in his chest, the top of her head under his chin. She continued to sob into him and he gingerly put his hands on her back.
"Illumi?"
"Do you mean me, or someone else?"
She snorted a laugh and lifted a tear-stained face to look at him, "You. I don't want Fantasy Illumi anymore."
So now he was even unworthy in her dreams.
Then she kissed him softly. It tasted salty from her tears. "The shadow pales when compared with the real thing." She lowered her forehead to rest on his shoulder. "Illumi, will you be my bodyguard?" And with that, she fell fast asleep.
