He had been sitting in a daze, probably for too long. The others from his cabal had gone to do some missions, but after dealing with the nightmare in the Dream Palace, Tamarak needed some time.
Every time someone spoke he could hear the black signal. The awful buzzing, so discordant and Other compared to the tones of Gaia's bees. He heard the word 'Chuck' like grating sandpaper every time someone used his name. It was like John was determined to make him respond to Chuck. Tamarak had sat here for over a week just reminding himself in his head that he wasn't fucking named Chuck.
Here, sitting in the grass and listening to various Elvis Presley songs rolling out of Johnny Pagan's boombox, Tamarak shivered. The filth in his veins seemed to push and pull at his skin more than usual when he was in Tokyo. His head was always throbbing in some way or another. Using Demonic AEGIS didn't help either, and most things close to the Agartha gate were Demonic. If he could process the idea of getting up, he would have stood and gone to Seoul. Sat in the rain and meditated. Maybe go to Egypt and enjoy the sun on his face.
Panicked yelling, familiar panicked yelling, eventually drew him out of his thoughts. Familiar shocks of red and white hair, panicked eyes. He blinked and shook his head, rising to stand and nearly falling over after being still for so long. Johnny Pagan watched him with an interested eye, curious to see the statue move after so long.
"No, he HAS to be here. You don't understand. Yes, I realize we don't have permission to be in Tokyo but our friend-"
Krishna's voice, no nonsense but still pleading against the rules. It tugged a grin onto his mouth, ever so slightly.
His smile widened as another voice forced it's way into the conversation,
"We don't freaking care if we're allowed to be here. He's a Dragon, we know this is where he was and we've got to talk to him- Oh, hey Tamarak"
Salus and Krishna were surrounded by members of the Council, obviously trying to stop them before they went further into the city and got themselves killed.
Tamarak loped over and wound his arms around the shoulders of his friends.
"C'mon guys, back to Agartha. Sorry gents, I'll get them out of here" he bowed courteously to the Venetians who nodded in subdued gratitude.
The warm embrace of Agartha was amazing after chill of the black signal. The feeling of two bodies pressed into his sides as they changed dimensions was infinitely calming after days of wondering who he was. His previous confident stance and gentle guiding of his friends devolved rapidly into an exhausted sag. Krishna and Salus shared a look behind his back and led him towards the London portal.
"Weren't answering your phone, mate, we didn't know what else to do", Krishna muttered, her eyes casting anxiously between his blank face hidden behind ever present shades.
"We'll get you to the Tabula Rosa, get some proper sleep into you, jeez man, you look worse than me and that's sayin' something"
They were rewarded with a brief smile and Tamarak ruffled a gloved hand through Salus' pale hair.
"Don't think anyone looks worse than your ugly mug, Sal, not even draugr"
Another worried glance was shared. Tamarak's voice rasped with lack of use and lack of water.
The trio bought a room with a queen sized bed and ignored the inquiring stare of the clerk behind the desk. She was paid to keep quiet, the Tabula Rosa held all manner of indiscretions in it strange little box. Tamarak pulled his shoes off, dumped his jacket and sweat slick shirt on the floor before falling onto the bed.
Krishna passed the key card to Salus and he quietly left the room to grab them food and drink. She hoped he would be smart enough to pick up some kind of medication, though what could help the blue haired Dragon was beyond her.
"Tam" she started softly, almost hesitantly. She still wasn't sure they had done the right thing. It was one thing to take care of each other in the field, but he had had to start working with his cabal to do missions in Tokyo. Sure, whenever he had spare time he came and fought alongside the duo in Egypt, but the missing third was keenly felt.
A muffled groan came from the slumped body on the bed.
"We just… we got worried, hell if I know how we managed to actually meet up in Agartha together and find the branch to Tokyo, but you stopped answering your phone and-"
A hand had moved up the bed and rested itself against her leg.
"Relax Krish, I'm sorry I put you in that kind of a situation. I just.. I was a little lost there. I didn't know how long it had been"
His muffled words did nothing to ease her worries.
"Where were you lost?" she intoned softly. She and Sal both knew that it was only a matter of time before they were put in a team and sent to Tokyo to help with the fight there. The problem was, they had no idea what to expect. The branch in Agartha had been covered in filth tendrils, but the park they had ended up in seemed quiet enough.
So if Tamarak had been lost, it certainly wasn't in the physical world.
She watched him shudder and slowly push himself up.
"I saw… We all saw it, Krish. The dream, the… the signal that fills the filth. It soaks into everything" He turned to her now with a feverish light in his eyes.
Krishna had never seen him scared before.
"He whispers in the gaps, Krish. Plucks at strings and shatters glass and" hands went to his hair. He was pulling at it now. Sunglasses torn off and tossed into a corner. Wide, frantic eyes staring into a landscape Krishna couldn't see.
"He sees it all. Looked inside me. Tore me apart, warped me. Drowned me in a sea of peace"
The last word hissed out. As if it tasted sour in his mouth. As if it were a curse.
That, Krishna decided, was completely enough of that. She grabbed his shoulders, turned him towards her and slapped him across the face. It shut him up quickly and then she carefully wound her fingers in between his so he would stop tearing at his scalp.
Comfort was not something Krishna would say came naturally to her. She flew through battlefields with her hammer and chaos magic swirling around her in a maelstrom. Yet quiet noises of wordless protection were coming out of her mouth while she pulled him close. Safety, that was what she was good for. Their forward facing shield, feeling suddenly too young and out of her depth to help Tamarak.
The door slid open and closed. Steaming tacos in each hand and two bags of drinks perched on skinny arms, Sal took the room in with an almost victorious expression. Likely, they weren't supposed to bring food up to the rooms. Even more likely, Salus had fought the point and won.
Still, he toed off his shoes and lined the three pairs up by the door before placing food and drink down next to them. Tamarak's glasses were folded and placed in his jacket pocket, which Sal folded along with Tam's shirt. Three neat piles of clothing, sustenance and shoes were set before Sal sat down on Tam's other side.
It was amazing how much cleanliness Sal required, for the chaos he caused on the battlefield.
While Krishna had her arms around Tam's shoulders, Sal moved his to clutch at Tamarak's abdomen. He nuzzled into the man's shoulder before glancing up to meet Krishna's eyes.
Finally, after a few moments of quiet, she spoke:
"He can't get you here Tamarak, we've got you and we'll keep you safe"
Another shudder and what almost sounded like a sob wracked through his chest.
"Please. Please Krish, not that name. He knows that name. Every time someone says it, all I hear is him calling me Chuck. Please, please. Not that, my name. You... " His filth stained eyes searched hers before turning to look at Sal.
"You both.. Please, my name. My name is-"
Sal cut him off, putting a hand over his mouth to muffle the word.
"You can't say it, boyo. You can't do that, you know how dangerous it is to disclose- OW!"
Glaring, the albino man pulled his freshly bitten hand away from Tamarak's mouth.
"I can't hear you say that name right now. Just for a bit. You don't.." Tam looked between them now, "Neither of you have to tell me your real names, but I need to hear something other than… than the name John knows"
A slightly hysterical laugh bubbled up before Tamarak smiled between the two. While not knowing it, both Salus and Krishna were idly wondering if Tamarak had just finally cracked.
With a sudden seriousness that was more appropriate, Tam placed a heavy hand on Sal's shoulder.
"Keep it secret", Tamarak intoned and then his other hand landed on Krishna's shoulder.
"Keep it safe" he stared into her eyes.
She couldn't help but roll her eyes to the ceiling. In any other time she would berate him for a bloody Lord of the Rings reference at a time like this, but the quote was oddly fitting.
"For tonight, just.. while we're in this room, please. Call me Ash"
The pair looked at him quizzically. Then shared a look,
"Is that…" and then Sal stifled a snort, "That short for Ashley?"
Quick as a cat, Tam grabbed a pillow and slammed it over Sal's head.
"Shut up, you. Ashley was a boy's name once!"
He then tossed the pillow towards Krishna, who deftly caught it and lay down with a smirk of her own. Sal took her cue and settled in on the other side, pulling a still grumbling Tamarak with him.
"Not like I got to pick my birth name guys, c'mon, have some sympathy"
"...Ash, your original name is a kind of tree. Your chosen name is a kind of tree. That is an astounding lack of originality and it is entirely on your part", Krishna calmly sniped while using a mana charged hand to signal the lights to turn off.
Tamarak barked a laugh and slid his arms around the pair, who obligingly curled into him on both sides.
"Well, when you put it like that m'dear, I suppose you're not wrong"
He didn't sleep that night, but at least John's black signal didn't penetrate here, where the air was filled with Krishna's soft snores and Sal's occasional dream whimpers.
