The days blurred by and I found myself sitting in a plane. A nine hour plane ride all to myself. Fun.
I was still in denial. I didn't want to believe that Lachlan was dating a girl. I didn't want to believe that she was coming on the trip. I didn't want to think that I'd probably hear noises in the middle of the night. But I did believe that I had a zero percent chance of getting over my disappointment and loneliness unless Lachlan became less perfect.
I came up with a plan. After all, a giant metal tube that was twelve kilometers in the air possessed the perfect conditions for planning. After the trip, there was no chance I'd live to see another day. I just wasn't. If, somehow, worse came to worst, I'd simply commit suicide during the trip. I had brought my blades and sleeping medication, anyway. Besides, I had spent months perfecting my suicide note, it only made sense put it to good use.
As straightforward as it was, I was done. I was pushed over the line. After contemplating suicide for ages, the past week was the last straw. And what better time to commit suicide than after saying my final goodbyes?
Sitting in the airport was always very boring to me. More often than not, I was waiting to be picked up by a friend who was running late. Just like how I found myself sitting on the curb, staring at passing cabs, cars, and buses.
While fiddling with the hem of my sleeve, I fought the urge to bring out my blades. It had been a whole day since I last cut. It was so damn itchy. Damn my addiction to cutting.
Suddenly, a car horn honked right in my face. "What are you doing, Vik? Get your butt up!" a voice yelled. I looked up to see Mitch in the driver's seat of the car with the passenger side window rolled down.
"Hey! That's how you greet me?" I asked, mock offended. I glanced into the backseat window and saw an unfamiliar girl. After a second look, I noticed Lachlan sitting next to her. My chest tightened.
"Only joking. Come here!" Mitch said, getting out of his car. He stopped when he was front of me, and he spread his arms open. His face was basically begging me to hug him.
"No, don't touch me," I told him, dead serious. A look of confusion formed on his face. "Kidding." I just about jumped on him. It felt like forever since I had last seen him in real life.
"Long time, no see, Icky Vikky Sticky," Mitch sighed, pulling away.
"Yeah, I know," I agreed. I saw him glance at my arms.
"Aren't you hot in that sweatshirt? It's almost eighty degrees out here! In fahrenheit, I mean," Mitch asked. In all honest, I was fine. It was a bit humid, but otherwise fine.
"I'm good, thanks for asking though," I replied.
"Come on, then. I'll put your bags in the trunk and you get get in the passenger seat," Mitch suggested.
"You sure? You don't have to do that," I said, guilty about him doing anything for me. He already went through the trouble of picking me up.
"Yeah, I'm sure. Go say hi to Lachlan and his girlfriend," he insisted, shooing me away. Hesitantly, I nodded and got into the car.
I didn't notice before that Lachlan was head was rested on his girlfriend's shoulder, and she looked wide awake.
"Hey, I'm Natalie. You're Vik, right?" Lachlan's told me a lot about you, " she greeted. I didn't think it was possible, but my life got even more cliche. She was one of the most beautiful girls I had ever seen and she had kindness almost literally oozing out of her. Don't get the wrong idea, I was one hundred percent gay, but I knew when I saw someone who looked generally attractive.
"Yeah, I'm Vik," I said, plastering a fake smile on my face. "I wish I could say that I've hear about you, but I kind of didn't know you existed. No offense," i added. Shit. I didn't think there could have been a worse introduction. I knew that if she didn't like me, Lachlan would "suddenly decide" that I wasn't worth his time. I wasn't, but it was nice that he bothered with me.
"Yeah, I know," she laughed. "Lachlan wanted to… surprise you guys? I have no clue why he didn't tell you until now. I'm also really sorry about coming last minute."
"No, no, it's fine." It definitely wasn't fine. "I'm sure the vacation will be better now that you're here." If better meant staying in my room, avoiding any social interaction.
"I'm only going to stay this one week. Hopefully that's enough time to get to know you all!" she told me, cheerfully.
I internally sighed in relief. At least one week of being locked in my room. But who knew how much could happen in a week?
Mitch opened the driver's door and slid into the front glanced at Natalie, and then at me. His eyes lingered on my face, and he noticed that I saw. "Something wrong?" he mouthed. I shook my head, signaling a no. He raised an eyebrow. "We're definitely talking later, Vik. We really need to catch up," he spoke out loud. Wow, subtle.
Then the car ride got very awkward. It obviously wasn't intentional, but I knew that Mitch and I didn't want to talk in front of Natalie, someone we only just met. Otherwise, we would be talking to no end. I felt uncomfortable even thinking about trying to bring up a topic of conversation.
"Vik?" Mitch asked, under his breath.
"Hmm?" I hummed in response, pretending to be interested in all the palm trees.
"I knew that was blood, last week during that group call. That was blood on your sleeve," he whispered.
"What makes you think that?" I replied, acting clueless.
"The fact that food coloring doesn't look like that and how you're bleeding right now," he answered. I took a look at my sleeves, and they were definitely stained red. I had been subconsciously scratching my wrists.
"Shit.." I mumbled. I looked at the rear view mirror and, fortunately, Lachlan was still asleep and Natalie had earbuds in.
"It's not what I think it is, is it?" he cautiously asked. Lie or tell the truth?
"It depends what you're thinking," I muttered. Guess I chose to be vague.
"You know what I'm thinking," he snapped, his voice raised.
"Did you say something?" Natalie asked, pulling out an earbud.
"No, I was just talking to Vik," Mitch replied. She nodded and flashed a smile before she put her earbud back in. Mitch sent a glare my way.
He definitely wasn't going to let me get away without talking.
