DollFace080: Thanks for your review! They're not really likeable, are they? Anyway, enjoy!

Katy: Thanks very much! It seems like a very difficult period to live in, doesn't it? I hope you like the next chapter.

MsPadfootVerona: I'm still writing! I'm still writing! I'm glad you thought it was a good chapter :) I liked your comment about not being in control. It's very true. Niamh's really in a dead end now...

hpandfriendsruletheworld: Sorry! It's not over yet...

Padfootz-luvr: Wow! You are really making me blush! But if it wasn't for JKR, I wouldn't be able to write this fic :D Enjoy the next chapter!

Messr-Paddifoots-love: Will I? I guess you'll have to read to find out ;) Enjoy!

lacatamar: Here it is! I hope you're still alive lol.

J: Cliffhangers are a lot of fun to do, I must say :D Here's the next chapter. I hope you like it.

PotentialTempest: Thanks! You're right: Astarte is just doing what she thinks is right. She will do anything to protect the good name of the family and take out those who threaten it, no matter who they are...

Disclaimer: I don't own anything from JKR's novels and I'm not making any money out of this, so sueing is pointless, really...


Broken and Tied Together

I paced nervously around the room, clutching my hands. I had sent a note to Sirius, telling him to meet me in the storage rooms. I fought back the urge to cry. My mind was made up, but every other part of my being begged me not to go through with this.

"I have to do this," I mumbled. "I have to, I have to." I whispered the words to the empty room, turning it into a mantra to convince myself. If I couldn't pull this off, Sirius would be dead and so would I.

I stopped my pacing, forcing myself to calm down. Sirius had a way of seeing right through me, but I could not let that happen this time. He had to believe me. If I told him the truth, he wouldn't stay away. The threats would not concern him. He would simply defy them, meeting my father head on. And dead he would be. Not straight away, no, my father would enjoy himself first.

Sirius might not love me, but I loved him and my mother's threats had chilled me to the bone. My father would kill him, the blood traitor that had defiled his daughter. Killing two birds with one stone. My stomach turned. I was doing this to protect him. And myself.

The door opened. Turning towards it, I begged for enough strength. I braced myself when Sirius stepped inside, leaning against the door to close it. He grinned. "Never knew you liked the storage rooms so much, love. You should have told me ages ago."

Every part of my body tensed as I looked at his handsome face. His sleek, black hair that he brushed impatiently out of his face, the mischievous gleam in his eyes, the naughty smirk that played on his lips.

I took a deep breath. Sirius frowned. "Are you alright?" he asked concerned, walking towards me. I stopped him from wrapping his arms around me with a hand on his chest.

"I'm fine," I said, as cool as I could. "We need to talk." I took a step back, knowing that if he stayed this close, I would never be able to do this.

"What about?"

Merlin, please help me.

I put on a stoic mask and folded my arms. "This has been nice for as long as it's lasted. But we will graduate tomorrow and this has got to end."

"What do you mean, end?" Sirius frowned.

"This. Us," I said, gritting my teeth, unable to elaborate. "It's over."

"What are you talking about? I thought we had something special going on." He looked in disbelief at me, a faint hope in his eyes that I was just making a joke. It felt like somebody stabbed a knife between my ribs.

"It's time to grow up. We had our fun, true, but that's over now." I folded my arms a little tighter, trying to hug myself.

"I don't believe you. What the hell is going on?" he demanded. "We had more than just fun, Niamh, and you know it."

"Surely you don't believe that yourself," I scorned disdainfully, twisting the knife in my chest a little further.

"Yes, I do!" Sirius shouted, losing his temper. "Damn it, what are you trying to do?"

"I'm ending this," I hissed. "It was nice while it lasted and you're great in bed, but that was it. Nothing more." I stared icily at him.

Sirius's jaw dropped. "You can't be serious. How can you say that? It is more. Jesus, Niamh, when you sent me that note I thought you wanted to talk about after graduation. What we're going to do. I want you with me!" he shouted, running his hands through his hair.

That gesture, so typical of him, gutted me and I closed my eyes for a second.

"I love you, Niamh."

My eyes snapped open. He walked towards me, saying, "I don't care about the others. I need you in my life."

No, no, please no…

I fought back my panic. I couldn't falter now. I had to make sure we were both safe. I stepped away from him. "You want me in your life?" I scoffed viciously. "Well, I don't want you in mine. We're through. And I suggest you stop making a fool of yourself, before you make me laugh."

Sirius stared at me, the hurt clear in his eyes. He was always so open, never holding back, so unlike me. And now I would use it to give him the final blow.

I curled my lip up in disgust, sneering, "Surely you didn't think I would ever want to be seen in public with a filthy Muggle-loving blood traitor, did you?"

Sirius stared at me, anger, disbelief, and hurt fighting for control. "You cold bitch," he breathed, still struggling with what I just said to him. I raised a contemptuous eyebrow at him.

"Unbelievable." He shook his head, taking a step back from me.

My hands ached to reach out to him, telling him I was sorry and that I didn't mean it. That I loved him too. All I did was stand there, keeping the icy mask in place and waiting for him to turn away from me.

Sirius raised his hands in defeat. "Fine," he said, "have it your way." He gave me a deadly look. "What a talented actress you are to have me fooled like that."

I'm fooling you right now! I screamed in my head. I stared back with a expressionless face.

Sirius turned his back on me, jerking the door open. "Enjoy your graduation," he spat out bitterly, before the door slammed shut. It rang in my ears.

I stood there for a moment, holding my breath, until a sudden wave of nausea overtook me and I threw up on the floor. Shaking, I pointed my wand at the mess and muttered, "Scourgify."

I felt numb. My breath hitching, I walked to the door like a wooden doll, and went back to my mother's room. She was waiting for me.

"It's done," I croaked.

"Good," she said. "It's almost time for dinner. Dumbledore invited me to dinner in the Hall earlier, but I told him I wasn't feeling well. I can't bear to look at that blood traitor. I will see you tomorrow morning. We have to discuss which dress you'll be wearing at the ball. I don't want anyone thinking that something is wrong."

I stared out of the window. My mother's rigid grip on my shoulder pulled me from my thoughts. "Are you listening, Niamh? If you do even the slightest thing on the ball to suggest that something is wrong, I will carry out my threat."

"I understand," I said.

"I hope so. You may leave."

Without a word I turned around and left her. I walked around the corridors for a while, before I went to the Hall for dinner. I avoided looking at the Gryffindor table and took a seat with my back to it, feeling like a coward. It didn't help the sense of furious eyes burning into my back, though.

I listened to the talk of my house mates, without hearing what they said. I moved my food around my plate a little. The bites I took stuck in my throat and more than once my eyes filled with moist. I quickly blinked to get rid of the tears, to make sure no one saw them.

After dinner I went to my dorm and curled myself up on my bed, listening to Sirius's angry shouts in my head.

It didn't matter what he shouted. It was for the best this way. He was safe and I was safe. It didn't even matter that he'd told me he loved me. How long would that have lasted anyway? Evan wasn't so bad, I could be happy with him. I would have a good life, not having to look over my shoulder all the time.

"Niamh?" a soft voice asked. It was Lana. I didn't answer and bit down on my pillow.

"What's wrong?" I heard her footsteps and felt my bed dent a little when she sat on it.

"Wrong?" I scoffed. "Nothing's wrong. I'm going to marry Evan. I've never been happier."

"What?" Lana said confused. "What do you mean? What about Sirius?"

I couldn't hold back a whimper.

"Niamh, stop it," Lana snapped. "Look at me." She put a hand on my shoulder and I rolled on my back, looking at her. "What happened?" she asked gently.

"I broke up with him," I said, my lip trembling.

"Oh, darling, why did you do that?" Her kind and gentle voice caused tears to gather in my eyes.

"Be -- because I'm going to marry Evan," I choked. Lana pulled me up and closed me in her arms. For the first time in seven years I cried in the arms of my best friend. She stroked my hair and made soothing noises, while I let my control over myself go.

When I calmed down a little, she pushed me back and said, "If this isn't what you want, then we can do something about it. We can -- "

I stopped her. "Don't, Lana. It's done. It's for the best this way. I will marry Evan. Just be my friend and support me, please?"

Lana hesitated for a moment, but then she sighed. "Alright, if this is what you want."

"This is what I want."


The next day passed in a blur. I didn't even remember what colour my dress was after the fitting session in my mother's room. I stared out of the window, seeing nothing but the occasional flash of Sirius's face before my eyes. My mother's renewed threat enabled me to greet my father and brother properly and with a smile plastered on my face late in the afternoon. My brother pulled me in a bear-like hug, saying I had made an excellent choice.

When did he become such good friends with Evan? I thought bewildered.

My father cupped my face with a proud gleam in his eyes and kissed me gently on the cheek. He walked past me to my mother and suddenly I was face to face with my future husband. Evan gave me a brilliant smile and took my hand to kiss it.

"Hi," I choked while fighting the urge to jerk my hand back.

"Let's leave them alone for a moment," I heard my mother say, followed by retreating footsteps. I clenched my other hand in a fist, drawing blood from my palm with my fingernails.

"Niamh," Evan beamed. "I can't tell you how happy I am you accepted my proposal."

A feeble smile was all I could muster. "It was a bit unexpected," I said.

Evan chuckled. "I know. And I'm aware that we don't know each other very well, but I was very much impressed with you when I saw you again on New Year's Eve, and even more because of your letters. I knew I wanted a wife like you, and when your father told me you weren't engaged, which astounded me, franky…"

It was becoming painful to keep the smile on my face. For some reason my mind drifted off and I made a mental note to buy a stock of Spellotape to hold the corners of my mouth up, so I would be able to smile like this the rest of my life. I giggled.

Evan took it as encouragement and continued, "I couldn't take the risk that someone else would beat me to it, so I asked your father for your hand."

"And he accepted," I finished for him.

"Yes. I feel very fortunate," Evan said gallantly.

"So do I," I said, noting that my smile was fading and quickly revived it. Evan smiled back. "Come on," I said, "I'll show you to your room."

Feeling like a puppet whose strings were pulled by my mother, I walked Evan to his room, where he pulled me inside. "I know the engagement isn't announced until tonight, but I wanted to give you this in private," he said. He opened his hand and showed me a ring. Not surprisingly, it was silver and had three emerald stones embedded in the twisting silver bands that the ring was made of.

"It's very beautiful," I said and held out my hand. It was trembling.

"It's been in the family for ages. It's passed on from one heir to the next when they wed," Evan explained. He slipped the ring on my finger. Though it was a perfect fit, it felt like my finger was being squeezed off. I scolded myself for acting ridiculous. This was what I wanted, wasn't it?

Evan stroked my cheekbone with his thumb and it hit me what he had in mind. I forced myself to stand still and not back away, for such a reaction would be considered quite strange. When he leaned into me, my mind screamed not to think of Sirius and I locked him out of my head.

Evan's kiss was not unpleasant, but so unlike Sirius's. Pushing him out of my mind once again, I kissed my fiancé back. After a few minutes he pulled away. "You should get ready for dinner," he said with a boyish grin on his face. "We'll have plenty of time to continue this later."

My body tensed, but he didn't notice it. "I'll see you at dinner then," I said and left.


Gryffindor Common Room

Sirius had been angry before in his life, in fact he was quick to lose his temper, but never had he experienced this sense of outrage, hurt, and confusion. He was unable to sit still for more than a minute. Every time he stopped moving a new flame of fury blazed through him, causing him to leap to his feet again and resume his pacing.

James had jumped to his friend's side immediately, trying to comfort him. The last few weeks he had thought that maybe he should warm up to the unconventional love of his best friend, but now it seemed he was right after all. Padfoot's behaviour worried him. He had never been this upset about a girl. James gritted his teeth, imagining the unpleasant things he would do to that Slytherin bitch if he ever caught her alone.

Remus sat in a large armchair, feeling dumbstruck. He had watched James and Sirius pace around the common room the entire day and the evening before, wondering how he could have been this wrong about Niamh. They had spent quite some time together revising their NEWTs and he had been so sure that what she felt for his best friend was sincere.

Peter climbed through the portrait hole. "We should get to the Entrance Hall. Parents will be pouring in at any moment." His eyes fixed themselves on Sirius and his face fell. "Are you coming too, Padfoot?" he asked quietly.

Sirius looked up. "Coming? Yeah, sure -- your parents are coming, aren't they, Prongs?"

"Yup," James answered.

"Let's go," Sirius said, a determined expression appearing on his face.

They walked to the Entrance Hall. Sirius, in deep thoughts, suddenly bumped into Remus, who had frozen on the spot. "Merlin, Moony, watch out," he growled.

James had frozen too. Sirius followed their gaze.

"Uh-oh," Peter said, which was not quite what Sirius was thinking.

At the other end of the hall Niamh stood, smiling at a handsome man who kissed her hand.

"Evan Rosier!" Sirius hissed. "What the hell is he doing here?" Fire shot out of his eyes. He watched the two converse pleasantly with each other. Rosier didn't let go of Niamh's hand and she didn't mind.

His friends watched Sirius tense up with apprehension. He was about to explode. They knew all too well what happened when their friend exploded. James put a hand on his chest to refrain Sirius from bursting in on the two. When they walked away hand in hand he sighed in relief.

Sirius's chest heaved. "That witch," he snarled. "What in Merlin's name is she doing with Rosier? If he isn't a bloody Death Eater, then Dumbledore is."

James glanced at him, reluctant to speak his mind. It seemed that Niamh was more involved in the Death Eater group than any of them had thought. After all, why wouldn't she be, with a family like that? Sirius had been very wrong about her.

"James!" a cheerful voice called. Lily walked towards them, her red hair bouncing up and down. She beamed at her boyfriend.

James grinned and pulled her close for a kiss. She broke away a little later and said, "I want you to meet my parents and my sister." She took James's hand and gestured with the other at the rest of the Marauders. "You come along too."

They met Lily's slightly nervous parents and her rather sour-looking sister Petunia. Sirius had little time to stew on Niamh after that, because James's parents dropped in at that moment, as did Remus's and Peter's.

Zarah walked by with her parents, causing Remus to frantically search for something invisible in his pockets. Sirius rolled his eyes, but didn't have the energy to call her to introduce themselves to her parents. Fortunately James did, and ten minutes later Remus stood baffled, looking at Zarah's retreating back and panicking whether he would remember the steps of the dance he had just asked her to dance with him.

James and Peter smirked at their distraught friend and ushered him back to the common room where they changed into their dress robes. Sirius followed, simmering with anger.

A little while later they met their parents in front of the Great Hall and walked in for the graduation ceremony.


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