note: It gets messy. Be warned. I ate a muffin while I wrote this, so eat one while you read it. Also, sidenote - penname change from swirling-summernotes to centralperks. Still me, however.


It's written on your face
Just like a twist of fate
I can't erase it
Some things you know we can't escape

Augustana, On The Other Side


I scratched my quill along the piece of parchment, copying down the last of the reports my boss had given to me that morning. Setting the quill down, I gave my temple a massage to ease the pain that I could feel growing. The last few weeks had been crazy in my Department – the Department of International Magic Cooperation – and I could feel myself wearing out. The day had been long – I had met Max for lunch, and the conversation was pleasant, but I did hope that he would get around to asking Lily out soon – there was only so long I could coach in the ways of women before he had to jump in with two feet into cold water. He would never be ready. None of us would ever be ready for anything.

I rose as the clock chimed five, and began shoving items into my bag. Just as I was heading out the door, a handsome barn owl swooped in and landed on my shoulder. I recognized it as Marcellius, my grandmother's owl. He dropped a note in my hand, pecked my finger affectionately and flew back through the door where he had come from.

Dear Rose,

I hope work is going well for you, and you're not too busy. I'm trying to get everyone round here for dinner tonight - I was thinking seven o'clock? Can you pass the message onto Al for me, dear?

Grandmum

I groaned, letting my head fall back. Dinner with the family was the last thing I wanted tonight. Shoving the parchment into my already full bag, I made my way to the lifts.

"Mum?" I asked, knocking softly on her office door, "can I come in?"

"Rose?"

I eased the door open to find my mum sitting behind her desk, reading a thick text. Harry was sitting in the chair on the other side of her desk, feet up. He was playing catch and release with a Golden Snitch. Irritably I sat down in the empty chair beside him.

"How much would I have to pay to get out of this family dinner tonight?" I asked the two of them.

I saw them exchange glances before turning to me. "What's going on, miss? You love family dinners." Harry caught the Snitch once more, but this time held it in his fist.

I shrugged. "Just not really up to it."

"Are you in a row with someone?" Mum asked.

I shook my head. "I'm just really tired. Work's been crazy, and I just don't feel like sitting in a large, crowded house with loud people."

"To be honest with you, kiddo, I don't feel much like going either," Harry said, shaking his head. "There's so many family dinners a bloke can go to in a month."

My mother shot him a look. "Well, that's the truth," he cried defensively. "I don't much feel like going. Rose is an adult, she can handle it."

I nodded fervently. "Makes me feel a whole lot less like a jerk if the great Harry Potter is on my side," I responded teasingly. "Speaking of Harry Potter, what's he doing in my mothers office?"

"Waiting for your mother's husband to get off work so we can go to said family dinner," he replied, releasing the Snitch once more. "The dinner that I will be on my best behavior for," he added, throwing my mum an indignant look.

She sighed, a piece of cinnamon hair blowing out of her face. "Oh, all right. Truth being, I don't want to go either. Happy?"

"I knew it," Harry grinned triumphantly. "It's all over your face."

Turning back to me, my mum added, "I don't believe you, though, Rose. There's a reason why you don't want to go tonight."

"I told you the reason!"

Mum looked searchingly at me. "You're lying."

I cursed under my breath. The real reason was I didn't want to have to face Lucy. After my morning at the mall with Scorpius, I didn't fancy running into her, and had such been avoiding her.

Just then, my dad barged into the office. "Rose, what are you doing in here?" He planted a kiss on my cheek before sitting on the edge of Mum's desk and intercepting the Snitch that Harry had once again released. Without waiting for my reply, he said – "so, dinner tonight? Does anyone actually feel like going?" The three of us looked at each other and laughed.

"Actually, no," we said at the same time.

He tossed the Snitch back to Harry and thus a game began. Feeling this could be my ticket out, I looked at my father with pleading eyes. "Daddy, do I really have to go?"

"Why, sweetheart? Feeling sick?"

I shook my head. "Just don't want to go. It's not fair – none of us want to go, so why are we?" The Snitch buzzed anxiously around my ear and my mum closed her book as we fell into a moment of silence.

"Truthfully," Dad said, "it's probably because no matter how much we try and deny it, we're all rather scared of Mum."

"And our wives," Harry muttered, and I laughed at his honesty.

"Is it six yet?" I asked. "Grandmum told me to let Albus know about tonight, and he should be home around six."

Mum checked her watch. "It's six now, Rosie," she replied, beginning to stack her papers in neat files on her desk. "The Floo powder is on top of the mantelpiece."

"Don't call me Rosie," I muttered, as I stood to the fireplace. Throwing the powder into the alcove, I stated our address clearly and stuck my head in.

"Al!" I called out. I could see the legs of our sofa from where my head rested, but I could feel the Snitch that my father and uncle were playing with hit the bottom of my feet. I hated Floo. "Albus! Where are you?"

"Rosie?"

Albus came into view, wearing sweatpants and towel drying his messy hair. "Hey," I said. "I'm in Mum's office. Can you meet us here, please? We've got a family dinner at Gran's in about an hour."

Albus groaned, dropping the towel on the ground. "Are you kidding me?"

"No. But none of our parents want to go either. Get here quick, maybe we can convince them not to go together." I stuck my head out of the fireplace to face my parents again. Lucky I had, because a moment later, he shot through the fireplace, sweats replaced with jeans and hair rumpled. He stepped out, brushing himself off.

"So this is where the party is," he said, throwing himself down next to Dad and intercepting the Snitch.

"Good to see you too, kid," Dad said, ruffling his hair. Albus ducked out of the way, grinning, and reached for Dad's flaming locks and the two of them got into a tussle that threatened to send them both over the edge of the desk. Sitting back down in my seat, I returned my attention to Mum.

"So, Mummy? What do you say?"

She sighed. "We're going, Rose. We have to."

I pouted. Harry and Dad looked at her with sad, puppy dog eyes and Albus jumped off the desk and round it to face her.

"Aunty, I've just suffered the worst, longest shift at Mungos. The Healers were mean, they kept stepping all over us interns, my feet ache, I've been listening to people complain all day long and I don't want to be in a houseful of people tonight. Please can we skip?" He stuck his lip out for good measure, and I had to resist the urge not to laugh at his poor attempt at sympathy from Hermione Granger-Weasley. However, her stony face seemed to crack – it did, in fact, the longer she looked at him. She planted a kiss on his cheek and sweetly said "absolutely not. But nice try."

Al pouted some more. "I thought I was your favourite nephew!"

Harry shot my mum an incredulous look. "You told him?"

Mum shrugged. "He called me out on it. I told him it was true. I'm passed caring, he knows perfectly well I like him best."

Dad let out a roar of laughter. "For goodness sakes, Hermione, you can't just go telling your nieces and nephews who you like best!"

"Well, I thought not either, but then they grew up! Do you really think any of them would care? Anyways, Al's not going to tell anyone. It's a secret safe with us. Besides, you obviously have your favourite as well, don't go trying to hide it."

" 'Course I do," Dad said immediately. "doesn't mean I'll ever tell."

"I didn't ask."

"No, hang on," said Harry, running a hand through his hair. "I'd quite like to know who it is, actually."

I propped my feet up on the desk, and my mother smacked them off. Al came round and enlarged the chair, and promptly sat down next to me.

"I know this is pointless conversation," he said quietly," but I'm all for killing time. None of them seem to have noticed it's almost seven."

Quietly, I agreed. "Besides, I'd quite like to know who my dad's favourite is. This is actually quite intriguing."

"It's me, obviously." I jabbed him in the ribs. He pushed back and sent me tumbling to the floor. Growling in admission I hoisted myself back onto the chair to see the amused grins of our parents.

"Just tell me!" Harry cried, going back to the conversation. "I thought we were best mates." He paused. "It better be one of my kids, though, or I'm calling off the past twenty plus years."

"Fine," Dad huffed, "but not in front of Hermione."

"Stupid," Mum said, "I'll find out anyways. Actually, I just did."

"How did you find out?!" Dad cried, "I didn't even say anything! How is it that she always knows everything," he muttered to Harry.

"You realize," I whispered quietly to Al, "that they're fighting pointlessly about their nieces and nephews?"

"Nutters. I wondered what they talked about before we were born, then."

"Well, fine," Harry was saying, "guess who it is, then, Hermione. Go on."

Mum grinned. "It's Al, same as me. That's why Ron didn't want to tell in front of me."

Dad scowled, and Al gave a whoop of appreciation. "No fair," I said, "how did you manage to become the favourite of both of my parents? What's so special about you?"

"Don't worry," Harry cut in, "you're my favourite niece, Rose. Just don't tell anyone I told you."

I laughed. "I know."


Three hours later and I was pushing my way through a crowded house. It was stuffed to the brim with people and I was developing a severe headache and a deep desire to be home on the couch with my books. Somehow, I had avoided Lucy the entire evening, sitting at the opposite end of the table during our meal, and occupying my time with other cousins inbetween. Luckily, nobody seemed to notice a thing.

Growing up in a crowded family, you learn the ropes fairly quickly. It's easy to blend in if you try hard enough, just as it's easy to stand out if you so desire. Always opt for blending in- it's much easier, trust me. You will be forced to spend time with them your entire life, so learn to get along with everybody, or you'll be miserable. Last but not least – find at least one person to navigate the madness with you. One person you can rely on during awkward family dinners, one person to share exasperated looks with when the room is overwhelming. Mine was Albus, obviously, and I was getting increasingly frustrated that I couldn't find him.

I crossed the living room, not realizing I was tripping over a pair of legs. With a twist of my ankle, I came crashing down on top of somebody with an almighty "oof." My forehead knocked against the person and I groaned in pain.

"I know you miss me, Rose, but you could be a little more subtle about." I raised my head to find myself face to face with James. "Also, if you could remove your elbow from my ribs, that would be tremendously helpful."

"Sorry," I grinned, removing my elbow from his stomach. "Have you by any chance seen Al?"

"No," James replied, with a roll of his eyes. "Probably hiding in Mum's old room or something, like the loner that he is."

I gave him a swift nudge in the ribs once more and rolled off of him, to find myself next to Fred and Dominque. The three of them were lying on their backs in front of the fire, no doubt planning some sort of havoc to wreak upon the family before dessert. Standing up, I brushed myself off, looking down at them. From my birds' eye view, they looked much younger than their twenty three years. I blew Dominque a kiss and kicked both Fred and James on the ankles before moving on deeper into the house to locate my friend.

The other thing about large families is that there is a never a place where you can be alone. Every room is always stuffed to the brim, and there is nowhere you can go that your thoughts and you will be alone. Case in point, I wandered into the kitchen thinking that it may be empty seeing as we had already eaten, however, Teddy and Victoire were sitting there drinking tea.

Victoire had always been cool – one of my more favoured cousins, to be completely honest. While she could have a reputation of being stoic and reserved, she was, in fact, nothing of the sort. She did hold back, but I always attributed this to her beauty – it is very easy to make friends when you are beautiful. The trouble is, they tend to be more followers than friends. She was highly intelligent, and I always enjoyed her company. Teddy was much more relaxed than she was, lighter, and I had come to accept him as another one of my cousins from a very early age. This being the case, I dropped into the chair beside Victoire.

"Looking for Albus?" VIctoire asked, sliding her mug in front of me.

"Yeah," I sighed, sipping the tea. "He seems to have disappeared."

"He hasn't," Teddy cut in, "he went out flying with your Dad and Harry about twenty minutes ago."

"Thanks," I replied. "Taking requests?" I asked, changing the subject. As us kids grew up, the magic of Teddy's abilities grew less and less magical, and thus we stopped asking him to transform in front of us. For me, however, one of my greatest thrills was watching him transform into someone completely different in front of me.

"Always for you," he replied with an easy grin. "What do you wish?"

After asking him to do Victoire, McGonagall (downright scary) and myself (strange and disturbing), we moved on to other topics.

"Anything new in your love life, Rose?" Teddy leaned back on his chair, changing his hair back to his regular brunette shade. As for his eyes, however, he left them Weasley blue. I scoffed.

"Yeah, right."

Victoire looked affronted. "Shut up, Rose, you're a catch. You've got brains and you're a looker. You could snag any one you wanted."

I considered telling them about Scorpius, but I decided against it. As much as I trusted them, I didn't want my secret leant to too many ears. I just shook my head and replied with, "thanks Victoire. I'm still young, I'm not too worried about it."

Victoire smiled. "That's a girl. You have all the time in the world. You're smart for thinking that."

Teddy and Victoire were one of the cool couples. In their early thirties, they were world travelers, hopping from continent to continent. They worked for a few months, saved enough to travel, and then picked a country from the map they hung in their flat. They had decided against having kids for the time being, and were still unmarried. In short, they had a really neat relationship that I admired quite a bit. They also laid off the PDA, which I highly appreciated.

"Let's just say," I said carefully, "let's just say there was somebody. Got any advice for that?"

"Does he return the feelings?" Teddy asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Not sure."

"Never sacrifice your intelligence," Victoire said immediately. "Don't dumb yourself down. Be yourself. Be honest, be kind, be forgiving, and be gracious and even if nothing comes out of it, always appreciate the things you first liked about him, no matter what."

Teddy nodded in affirmation. "If he's the right one, he'll appreciate what's in your brain more than what you look like."

Comments like that made me absolutely sure that Teddy was the one for Victoire. Before I could reply, however, a blue hairbrush ripped through the air and hit the cupboards with an almighty thunk.

"GET AWAY FROM ME, LORCAN, AND DON'T YOU DARE COME NEAR THIS ROOM AGAIN!" Lucy's shrieks from the third floor could be heard clearly all through the house.

"When did Lorcan get here?" I asked the two of them, bemused.

"Heaven only knows," Victoire said, "but for the amount that those two fight –"

"-they'll be married before they're twenty-five," Teddy finished for her.

"Even sooner," Victoire smirked, "I'll bet you five Galleons." They grinned at each other and dived into a complicated handshake that not even I could follow. Seconds later, footsteps came thundering down the stairs and a disheveled Lorcan came running into the kitchen.

" 'Lo, everybody," he said casually, reaching into the cupboards for a glass of water. I raised my eyebrows at him, questioning him about Lucy.

"Oh, she's just being Lucy – I tried to open the door to talk to her, and she shoo'd me away. Said the sight of me made her sick, what else is new?"

"Usually she has a reason for her annoyance towards you," I rationalized. "Surely you did something to piss her off?"

Lucy and Lorcan had had a rocky friendship (if you could even call it that) from the start. He was a year older than her, and somehow managed to pick on her every nerve from the time they were kids. It was often that the two of them were fighting about something, or annoyed at each other, or having screaming matches in the middle of the Great Hall when we were Hogwarts students. There was no other explanation for it other than Lorcan simply knew how to push every last button of Lucy's, and Lucy knew how to say things that drove Lorcan to absolute irritation.

"Negative, my friend," Lorcan said, setting himself down beside me. "But I'm not bothered, she'll come around."

"Why do you insist on provoking her anyways?"

He grinned. "It's fun."

"You are hopeless, Scamander."

"And don't I know it. How have you been, Rose? Haven't seen you since the night of your party."

"You hardly saw me – from what I recall, you were sloshed out of your mind."

Easy grin in place, Lorcan replied, "yes, well, you didn't expect me to stay sober, did you?"

I smiled, almost laughing at that comment. "Of course not."

Excusing myself, I headed to the loo. The door was unlocked and I pushed it open. The sight of what was inside made my insides turn to ice and my head spin, and it was all I could do to keep from passing out.

Lucy was standing in front of the mirror, her face tear-streaked and her blonde hair a mess around her face. The room felt hot and her breath was coming in short, heaving gasps. Her wand was clutched tightly in her hand, and this is what made my head spin the most – the tip was glowing blue.

Her head whipped around when I entered, and she shut the door behind me quickly, locking me in.

"Don't – don't tell anyone," she heaved, between breaths. My own voice was caught in my throat.

Finally, I mustered the strength to speak. "How far along are you?"

"About four weeks."

Her response sent my head spiraling out of control. I sank down one the ground and leaned against the door. "Do you know – do you know who's it is?"

She nodded weakly. "I've only slept with one person."

All of a sudden, my breath left my body. I needed to get out of this crowded, muggy bathroom with it's fogged up mirrors and my cousin whom I could barely look at. I stood slowly, my legs shaking and my mind spinning.

"Rose?" Lucy whispered, and when I looked up to see her, I saw not the nineteen year old girl that she was, but my baby cousin, whom I had used to run around with, played games with, and giggled with as a child.

"Please, please – don't tell anyone about it. Not just yet." She sniffed, running her hand against her cheek. Her blue eyes were leaking tears and didn't seem to be stopping.

"Why did you check now? Why, with everyone here?"

Lucy shrugged weakly. "I vomited after dinner, and I have been for awhile, I just – I just couldn't wait to know any longer, I guess. I'm leaving, now though . I'll Apparate from here and send an owl later."

I stared imploringly at her for a long while. I was shaking and tears were leaking out of my eyes as well, but not for her. Nevertheless, she was family. She was my own flesh and blood, no matter what. So with this thought, I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around her before leaving the muggy bathroom and shutting the door behind me.

Tearing down the stairs and out the front door, I wiped tears off my face. The cool night air whipped through my air and cleared my mind, however slight. I sprinted into the yard and yelled for Albus. I could see him and my father and Harry zooming around against the night sky, and against the stars it would have been an image I would have coveted had I not been preoccupied with other thoughts. Like a madwoman, however, I screamed Al's name again before he spotted me and began his descent. He must have seen my tears, for he broke into a run the moment he landed.

"Rosie? Rosie, what's going on?"

I couldn't speak, and I couldn't move, and so like an idiot I stayed there, rooted on the spot. I registered him pulling me towards him, clutching me tightly, and I was vaguely aware of my father and Harry approaching with caution. Pulling back, he took my shoulders and looked at me imploringly.

"Can you just take me home, please?"

"Hang on, Rose, what's going on?" Dad cut in. Al stepped aside, and my dad faced me. "Are you okay?"

I shook my head. "Please, Dad – I'm fine. Please, I just want to go home." I let him hug me before I reached for Albus once more. I slipped my hand in his and asked him again to take me home.


"You're freaking me out, Rosie," Albus said, leaning against the doorframe of the bathroom. I was brushing my teeth, and our eyes met in the mirror. Leaning down to spit in the sink, I rinsed my toothbrush and put it back in the cup. My face was blotchy and still streaked with tears. I looked at Al in the mirror again before sighing and heading into my bedroom.

He followed me, of course, but I shut the door and locked it to change. He pounded on it, and I opened up when I was covered in pajamas. Letting him in, he entered and sat cross-legged on my bed. I joined him, leaning against the headboard and facing him.

"Technically, I'm not allowed to tell you," I said softly.

Al rolled his eyes. "You've said those words to me so many times that they've lost meaning. Seriously. What happened."

I sighed again. The words were biting in my brain, and I knew they would taste bitter and hard coming out, and so I tried to keep them inside for as long as I could. Al eventually wore me out with his gaze, and so with as much strength as I could muster, I said, "Lucy's pregnant."

They were not as bitter as I thought they would be, but they still bit my tongue. I watched his face grow stony.

"With-?"

I nodded. "She said there was only one."

"I just –"

"I know."

There was nothing more that we needed to say. Al shut off the lights, and we laid down.

"I want to stop loving him," I whispered, after awhile. Albus did not say anything, but reached over and grasped my hand.

We fell asleep on top of the covers that night. Eliot was wrong – the world does not end with a whimper. It ends with an almighty, painful bang.


note: There you have it.. and there's more where that came from. Thanks for sticking with it, I always appreciate it.

Review if you feel like it.