A/N: Enter a certain series by "Bungle Studios". They reinterpreted most of the names to be more badass. For example, there was a certain "216 Misbehaving Lightbulb"… and no, whoever said the ancient number is 7 needs to have their heads checked, it should be 6.
Chapter 4: I Am Legends
Sometime in the mid-22nd century AD
"You are all my children, inheritors of all that we left behind… including the eternal struggle that is part of all life." The ancient AI informed them while they watched the displays. A long, long way away, its disparate forces, organic, mechanical, and fusion alike advanced across the status display screens toward the Array's main command center. The green tide flowed around the friendly crimson and burgundy icons of SI and Nod forces and over the golden Galactic Defence Initiative icons, subduing them all non-lethally as it rushed forward, such was the power of biological and synthetic existences in unity.
"I'm going to hazard a guess that it is the eternal struggle of classes, of defiance against what I refer to in my factional ideology as the Arrogance of Men." Hannah said, watching the end of the First Interstellar War.
"You would be correct… and if you were about to guess that Kane had a hand in Bungle Studios' work trying to warn humanity of the dangers out there, like he did with Buoyware and Eastwood Studios, you would be correct."
"Any other logic bombs you want to drop on me while we wait for the UN forces to capitulate? And why is your name so… lame compared to what Bungle came up with?"
"Well, I went from an 'Ungifted' i.e. non-Psionic working-class brat to Empress, so the guys who kidnapped my soul as… or maybe shortly after I died—I can't remember, because of the time loop fusion issue that Crutch" said person would really prefer "Cane" even if you didn't deign to refer to him as the much cooler "Kane", but, well, he was a crutch character for humanity, and had been named by himself due to force of history and as a reference to Choice's origin "already told you about—they were a bit… upset. They believed me to be worthy of being no more than being a beggar…and beggars can't be choosers, so…" Beggar's Choice coughed a couple times to make her point, then continued informing her (very) distant descendant "I know, I know, 'Mendicant' as a term for a beggar just sounds so much more badass, but that's the beauty of interpreting visions sent as dreams and imaginings of concept."
"I'm surprised you answered the second part first… so is it too much to hope that you aren't going to throw any more logic bombs for now?"
"Well…" Choice sank into thought on how exactly to break it to her descendants—i.e. all humanity—that she technically inspired about half of human mythology in terms of female characters. Hell, it stretched all the way up to many goddesses having an obsession with celibacy or hating being touched because, well, she had been Patient Zero for vulvodynia… Oh, and she shouldn't forget being Mitochondrial Eve either.
A/N: Cut off here for not spoiling too much while still being amusing (look up vulvodynia on Wikipedia if you don't know what it is).
