Dog Tired
Chapter Six
Harry had known coming back for his resit class at Hogwarts would not be the same as his school days, but the following weeks definitely reminded him of the emergency cramming just before exams – except that cramming was all the time and exams weren't for two months yet! He found himself growing more and more frazzled and short tempered, though he wondered whether that was more because of his workload or because of the growing child in his belly. It was visible to all now, much to the frustration of his instincts, a definite little bump. But whether his classmates recognised it for what it was or not, he had yet to discover.
Studying, ensuring his homework was done and raising a child, all while his body was busy making another little person, it was hard work. It was the fifth time he'd secluded himself away to the library during lunch break and he thought Hermione would be ecstatic if she saw him now. He smiled to himself as he scrawled down some more notes from the Charms text he had open, brushing his fringe back from his eyes. He'd have to remember to tell Hermione how hard he was studying these days. Making her proud was a perk of course and Fenrir and Kirian too, maybe even his parents wherever they were, but he wanted this for himself as much as anything. He had to pass these exams. He would.
"At it again?" Millicent said as she strode into the library, smiling as she took a seat beside him. "Did you manage to eat anything before you squirrelled away up here, Potter?"
Harry rolled his eyes. If only she knew he got the 'eat more' talk at home too. He scribbled down some more from the page he was on and then turned to the next chapter.
"I did wonder, by the way, is it still Potter or is it Greyback?" she asked, mildly curious.
Harry flushed. "I'm not Harry Greyback," he said, cheeks burning as Millicent beamed, eyes glittering.
"Your handwriting is appalling you know," she added, looking over his notes with disdain. "How can you even read them afterwards?"
Snatching back his notes, Harry placed them in the pile they'd been in before starting the next chapter on a new page. "It's not the appearance that matters really. I can read them fine, but it's mostly the writing it out that helps me remember things. You know, always been better when doing something rather than reading." He watched as Millicent smirked, very similar to the lightly affectionate yet derisive way that Draco often did. It must be a slytherin thing, he decided, but before he could find an appropriate come-back to that knowing look, he felt a brush in his stomach, an effervescent feeling that stopped him still.
Without thinking, he reached down, touching his stomach in awe. He'd known it to be true, of course but this, this had made it so real when he'd been having Kirian and it was no less world-changing now. He gave a small, breathless laugh. His and Fenrir's child was in there, maybe stretching or shifting about a little. Subtle movement to his right reminded him where he was and his flush returned as he realised Millicent was watching him, not only that but that Terry, Romilda and Katie had joined them at the table.
"I knew it," Millicent said shrewdly, keeping her voice down given their setting but loud enough that their table could hear. She looked at his stomach. "How long?"
Harry sat up a little straighter. His instincts still hummed uneasily at others knowing, but they settled easily behind his human character nowadays. He wondered if this was how Draco had felt with Astrid. The road wasn't smooth by any means, but it was not the apocalyptic drama at every turn he'd suffered with Kirian. He knew what Fenrir meant now when he said this was the way it should be.
"I'm due two weeks after our final exams," he said, pleased with how steady his voice sounded. Natural. This wasn't something he was ashamed of. "Is it weird for you to see?" he asked.
Romilda shrugged. "Sometimes wizards can get pregnant via magical means as well, it's just risky so it's not an everyday occurrence, but it happens. It is funny to see you with a little bump though…"
Harry smirked. "Yeah? I suppose it is," he glanced down at the small protrusion. It felt so normal. Everything did. "I don't get very big, it's all part of nature's way of making things safer for both of us. Fenrir did explain it to me years ago with Kirian. It's easier to understand than to explain."
"I'm surprised you have the energy to handle school and your little boy and this all at once," Katie said, leaning forward with interest. "Harry, you must be exhausted!"
"I wanted to have both and I didn't want to wait for either," he shifted awkwardly. "I'm not very good with patience. But I have to admit it's proved harder than I thought. I forgot how tired just…" he hesitated, "just being pregnant makes you." There, he'd said it. As easy as breathing.
"You're a bloody marvel, Harry," Terry proclaimed, a little louder than necessary, earning a glare from Madam Pince across the library. He winced and leant in closer. "You realise if you pass your exams you'll…well I don't know exactly but it'll be amazing!"
"If," Harry repeated, "if I pass. We'll have to see what next month brings." He winced, staring at the stack of books he still had to copy from. "At the moment I feel a bit like a dwindling light."
Across from him, Romilda snorted. "Nonsense," she said, opening the next book. "You're Harry Potter, the Chosen one, if you can face dragons and dementors and You Know Who then you can do this. Come on, there's forty-five minutes left of lunch. Let's make the most of them."
Feeling exhausted but with more optimism for his exams than he'd felt in a while, Harry headed to Shae after lessons were over to pick up Kirian. Eithne greeted him with bright-eyed delight. "And how is my second great-grandchild doing?" she asked as she walked with him out toward the front garden where Kirian was playing.
Harry smiled. "Good. Moving a bit now. Fenrir is convinced it's a boy."
Eithne's eyes sparkled. "And you believe it is a girl?" She glanced to Harry's stomach with a thoughtful smile.
Harry hesitated, hand on the door handle. "Is there a way you can tell?" he asked, intrigued by the look on her face.
She beamed at him, her wrinkles deepening as she did so. "Now, that would be telling, wouldn't it? There may be a little spell we can do to check. Would you be interested if there were?"
"Maybe," Harry said, wondering if Fenrir would be annoyed at him for making the choice without him. Probably. "I'll ask Fenrir," he mused, pushing the door open and heading out into the garden. Kirian was in the nearby flowerbed, scooping generous mounds of dirt over open holes that Harry assumed carried seeds. To his surprise, Teddy sat on the opposite side of him, apparently helping. They chattered animatedly as they 'worked' and Harry was struck with relief that nothing had changed between them.
"Have you seen much of Remus lately?" Harry asked Eithne.
"He's kept to himself but otherwise normal," she regarded the boys knowingly, "he feels a father's responsibility, that is all. He will come around. Do not take it to heart, Harry."
Nodding, he approached the boys and smiled warmly as their heads swivelled toward him. "Ready to go home messy boy?" he asked Kirian, who smiled sheepishly, wiping his dirty hands on the grass.
"Are you alright, Teddy?" Harry asked as Eithne stepped forward to wipe Kirian's hands clean.
Teddy, climbed to his feet. "Can I come have dinner with you soon?" he asked curiously.
Harry hesitated. "Err, lemme ask your dad, yeah? Maybe this Friday."
Teddy looked a little deflated.
"is everything alright?" Harry asked cautiously, watching Teddy wipe his hands on his jeans.
"I don't think Dad wants me to play with the pack anymore," he murmured solemnly, causing Kirian to grip Harry's robes and glance up at him worriedly.
"I'm sure that's not true, Teddy," he said consolingly, squeezing Kirian's shoulder. He glanced up at the sight of movement beyond the garden wall. "Is it, Remus?" Everyone's eyes followed his to where Remus stood, half way into the garden. He seemed to hesitate, meeting his son's gaze with uncertainty.
"They're…family, Ted," Remus said after a long moment. "I know none of them would hurt you intentionally. There's nothing wrong with you or them, just me."
Harry felt his chest ache and Teddy frowned, heading toward his father and wrapping his arms round him. "S'Kay, Dad," he mumbled into Remus' stomach. It was a touching moment, one Harry felt a little invasive for watching. Remus smiled sadly as he touched his son's head of currently mousey hair. Remus was having a hard time of it but he'd be alright.
"Come for dinner tomorrow," Harry said to Remus, "All of you. I think it'd be good. I think…I think you need it." He felt Kirian's hand slide into his and gripped it tightly. Children were more apt at seeing when comfort was needed, he thought.
"Tomorrow," Remus said softly and Harry steered Kirian back inside to floo back to their reception room.
"The baby moved today," Harry said that night as he eased himself onto the edge of the bed after putting Kirian to sleep. Fenrir turned onto his side, wrapping an arm round Harry and brushing his lips against his hip. Harry glanced down at him with a smile. "I err…think I outed myself to my class. They didn't seem to mind too much though. They seemed to think it was quite normal."
Fenrir smirked. "You're far too extraordinary to be 'normal'," he mused, hand sliding across Harry's bare stomach. "You're more confident than you were when you carried Kirian. I like it." His calloused fingers caressed the bump and Harry shivered but in a pleasant way, laying his own hand on the opposite side, willing the bubbling sensation to return.
"I feel more calm at any rate, for obvious reasons," Harry snorted. "I think…I know who I am now, you know? Pregnant or not. Parent or not. Werewolf or not. I'm not scared being pregnant will change me. It's still a bit…well, a bit weird I admit but it's in a good way. And Fleur and every other woman I've spoken to said it's weird for them too sometimes. It's not a 'girl' thing it's just a…parent thing. Having someone growing inside you." He slid onto his side so Fenrir could spoon against his back, covering Fenrir's hand with his own on his stomach. "There's no danger or heartache just…life's little dramas, you know? It's good."
"You sound almost giddy," Fenrir chuckled, grazing a shoulder with his bristly lips. He prodded gently with his fingertips. "Come on, move for your alpha."
Harry laughed. "She might be asleep. Don't poke," he said, lifting his head and letting Fenrir's other arm slide under it as it usually did, fingers brushing at his fringe affectionately.
"She might be a he," Fenrir said against his shoulder.
"There's a spell Eithne said she can do," Harry hedged. "You know, if you want. A lot of people in the muggle world do it to prepare themselves and…stuff." He flushed at how immature that sounded, especially for a man in his twenties about to be a father for the second time.
"If you want," Fenrir said cautiously.
Harry craned around to catch a glimpse of his face. "You don't want to?"
"I want to do things properly this time, the way we had stolen from us with Kirian." He pressed his nose to Harry's nape, all the better to smell him and stop him from seeing his expression. "I want to be the one with you when you whelp. I want to tell you what sex it is, to heal you. Bite the cord. Watch you clean him. Or her," he amended with an audible smirk. "But if you want-"
"-No," Harry said, turning in Fenrir's arms to look at him. Those eyes were soft and bright in the dimness, the backdrop of the drapes around the bed making everything feel so warm and dreamlike. "No. I want that too." He watched as a smile crossed that mouth before he felt it, brushing against his own, drawing a soft gasp from him. Large hands slid up his back, his shoulders, tugging gently at his hair, his backside, sliding over his stomach until he was tingling all over. He hummed softly in appreciation. "Why do we seem to have all these conversations in bed? Our most life altering ones?"
Fenrir chuckled against his jaw. "Because this is the place that is ours to talk about what we want, no interference from the outside."
"Our bubble," Harry murmured thoughtfully, his own fingers skittering down over hard muscle. A kiss to the sensitive place just behind his ear preceded his answer.
"Yeah," Fenrir mumbled. "I like the word 'ours'."
Harry groaned, gripping one of Fenrir's wrists in each hand and pushing, pushing until he pinned them above his head, throwing a leg over his waist until he was staring down at him. The heat of their bodies coming together was as sweet as ever and with hormones and instincts thrumming beneath the surface, it made Harry ache with the need to reaffirm their connection. Often. He growled softly, leaning down to smash their lips together, grinding into him. "Mine is good too."
Fenrir growled back, biting at his jaw in approval.
Harry awoke to a large hand stroking down his back then round to his stomach. He stretched languidly as a stubbly kiss graced his neck. Then he smelled the food. "Mmm," he mumbled agreeably, turning to catch that mouth with his own. He felt the chuckle against his lips and rolled over to hold Fenrir into the kiss for longer, until he could let him go. When he drew back enough to look into those eyes, he smiled sleepily, revelling in the warm hand on the swell of his stomach.
"Is that smile for me or for the food?" Fenrir murmured teasingly.
With a smirk, Harry pushed up under the sheets, looking down at the tray of bacon, eggs, toast and sausages Fenrir had brought in. He cocked his head. "You've never bring me breakfast in bed," he said thoughtfully, mind still half asleep.
Fenrir snorted, pulling the plate forward and setting it on Harry's lap. "I didn't realise you wanted it," he said dismissively, but there was an edge of evasiveness in his tone as he sat back against the headboard, letting Ghost lay his head on his stomach.
Stomach rumbling, Harry tore his gaze away from the sight and tucked into his breakfast. At first Fenrir lay beside him, stroking Ghost's ears absently, eyes shut. But as Harry struggled with the last mouthful, he noticed that Fenrir was watching him. Swallowing, Harry flicked his hand at the tray and it floated off to the far side of the room. "What is it?" he asked, wary. "I've gotten used to you watching me over the years but you've never watched me eat like that before."
Fenrir's brow furrowed and Harry knew before those lips formed words that he wouldn't like what he was about to say.
"I know you've been skipping breakfast a lot of mornings to cram in more time with Kirian and to get your school work done," Fenrir said, avoiding his eyes. "I'm guessing you do the same at that school."
Harry tensed and the anger and defensiveness in him must've passed through their connection because Fenrir's head whipped to face him.
"I'm just worried, alright?" Fenrir managed gruffly. "You've taken a lot on at once. You and the cub need food."
Harry shoved the blankets off and stalked into the washroom, cleaning himself roughly before snagging up a towel. As he dried himself, he caught sight of Fenrir in the doorway watching him. "You've already cheapened a nice gesture by insinuating I can't look after myself and my child. Piss off before you dig yourself an even bigger hole, Greyback."
Fenrir bristled, growling lowly. "Don't call me that," he sneered darkly. It most likely reminded him of the beginning, of the time when Harry had hated him and everything he stood for. At that moment, Harry didn't really care.
"It's better than the name I was calling you in my head," Harry snarled, shoving past him and heading into the living area. He seized his clothes from the nearest shelf and hurriedly dressed. He felt Fenrir behind him and this time it was him that growled warningly. "What do you want?"
"I want you to think about yourself for once," Fenrir snapped sharply, seizing Harry's arm and whirling him to face him. "Between sharing your gift and the cub and Kirian and me and sodding Hogwarts you're stretching yourself too thin. You're putting the cub in danger."
Harry's eyes flared, the wolf snarling inside his head. "Like last time with Kirian, you mean?" he hissed darkly. "When I failed him at everything. You think I'm failing just as spectacularly this time?"
"Stop overreacting," Fenrir retorted. "I never said any of that bollocks." He reached for him but Harry stepped back. Fenrir's face turned hard. "So I'm not even allowed to care about you anymore? Has your time in the Wizarding World reminded you how little you need me?" He didn't sound hurt, only angry, but Harry could sense the mixture of both. The problem was, he was feeling both as well.
"Well it's certainly not taught you any tact," Harry hissed, even if that didn't really make sense. "Did it occur to you that if I'm stretched so thin, I really need this argument and your judgement of my parenting skills like a hole in the head? That maybe I need you on my side?"
Fenrir scowled. "I am on your bloody side, you ungrateful little prick. Have I stopped you from doing anything you wanted this year? Or ever?"
The truth in that only made Harry angrier. Desperate. He wanted to leave. He wanted to hide. "Just say it – you think I'm taking risks with the baby, right?"
"Your…hormones or whatever, they're making you unreasonable," Fenrir replied sharply.
"Unreasonable, selfish and reckless," Harry drawled. "That about sums it up." He finished dressing, gesturing with his hand for Ghost to follow him toward the door. "You can't ever just do something nice without pissing all over it with your overprotective, superior alpha bollocks can you?" he snapped, yanking open the door.
'You're overdramatizing everything," Fenrir tried.
Harry turned to face him in the open doorway. "I'll be sure to add that to the list as well," he said. "I'll grab lunch at Hogwarts while I'm there, don't worry."
"Hogwarts on a Saturday?" Fenrir demanded, but Harry had already slammed the door behind him.
He managed to calm down somewhat as he sought Kirian out by the climbing frame carved from trees that had failed to thrive there. When he saw Draco talking with Larentia close by, however, he made for them first. "Coming to see Snape?" he asked Draco, who raised a brow at his tone and evidently flustered expression.
"Yes," Draco said cautiously, slowly. "Are you quite alright?"
Harry nodded jerkily, making toward the climbing frame, only to have Larentia's voice halt him. "Would you…mind if I accompanied you?" she asked. Her tone was so polite that it threw Harry and he stared. "You shouldn't let your mouth hang like it's the most shocking question you've heard."
Harry swallowed. "No, no I just…" He scrubbed at the hair at the back of his head. "Yeah. I'm leaving in a sec but you can come." A little off kilter from his mood now, he approached the frame, where Kirian swung down off the nearest branch to beam at him.
"I'm going to see Professor Snape. Do you want to come?" he asked, the widening grin was all the answer he needed and the warm little hand in his was a soothing balm to his frayed senses.
"it is impressive but the invigilators will not be interested in the facts," Snape said dryly, handing the parchment with Harry's mock exam back to him. "They aren't interested in the facts. They know the facts. The exam paper is about proving that you know it. Every statement has to be backed up with evidence and research, as if you have to prove your knowledge."
Harry frowned thoughtfully. "So it's not enough to know it. I have to show how I know it?"
Snape smirked. "After all these years you finally comprehend. Good things do come to those that wait."
"Sod off," Harry grumbled good naturedly as Kirian continued to move the brightly coloured potion vials into the correct order Snape had advised in the racks. "Are you sure he's alright handling those?"
Snape glanced over to the child. "He has respect and interest for potions, which is more than you ever had. He will do just fine." Snape looked across the table to where Larentia and Draco sat, Astrid yawning widely from the crook of Draco's elbow. Apparently she was teething and had kept Draco up all night with it, it showed. There were dark circles under Draco's eyes but he looked content as ever.
"Your daughter looks well, Draco. She has grown considerably since last I saw her," Snape said with his usual reserved affection.
Draco beamed, practically preening like a bird. He looked down at the little girl dressed in browns and creams and smiled proudly. "She is remarkably splendid. I am quite sure there isn't a little girl alive that could match her for beauty."
"Quite," Snape drawled, just as one of the elves appeared with tea, levitating the cups and saucers silently before each of them with a supply of malted milk biscuits before vanishing with a pop. Harry watched as Draco handed a biscuit to Astrid, who started gumming it contently, bringing a smile to Harry's lips. Perhaps it was his acceptance that doing this again would not be what it had been with Kirian, even in spite of his argument with Fenrir, but the sight of Astrid made him ache for the moments like that, where Kirian had been that small, soft and helpless. Across the room, his little boy was being very important and not so little at all.
"…and Tonks are planning more, but they are waiting for her to finish her course so that she can teach new aurors rather than be out in the field. After Harry, I will wager she's next," Draco was saying as he sipped his tea.
Harry glanced surreptitiously to Larentia, who must have felt a twinge of longing at the topic. He kicked Draco under the desk, hoping that would be enough to silence him even if Draco didn't know exactly how he was putting his foot in it. "Did Remus seem alright when you saw him today?" Harry asked Larentia, who'd been in charge of the village run that morning.
She shrugged. "He seemed better. He's an old dog set in his ways is all. He's got a good life and he knows it. Lycanthropy isn't the disease he thought it was, don't worry so much about him, you've got enough on your plate." Her voice was firm, blunt but filled with warmth that made Harry smile softly.
"He is not such an old dog, by werewolf standards," Severus mused dryly.
Larentia met his gaze in slight surprise, "Indeed," she said simply.
For a moment there, Harry felt like he was intruding and he shifted uncomfortably. "Kiri, come and have some biscuits," he said by way of alleviating the awkwardness, "your favourite. The elves remembered."
After the biscuits were all gone, Draco excused himself to go and show Kirian and Astrid around the grounds. Snape excused himself to check on a potion in the adjoining room and Harry seized his chance. Leaving Larentia leafing through a novel she'd plucked off Snape's shelf, he headed into the other room.
"There is something bothering you," Snape said without looking up from the clear crystal cauldron that was boiling a hearty gold concoction within. His wrinkled brow was furrowed with concentration. "And I do not believe it is your essay."
Harry sighed, stepping closer. "Am I so obvious?" he asked dismally.
Snape did not glance up from the potion but did set the pestle down, turning a small hourglass upside down to time. He rapped it with his wand once before finally meeting Harry's gaze. "Troubles with your…less than eloquent other half?" Snape drawled.
Harry sighed. "Be nice," he said.
"Nice is impractical, Potter. Suffice to say if you are looking so ponderous about whatever you two have inevitably squabbled over, you are likely seeing some truth in whatever ridiculous thing has come to his mouth."
With a wince, Harry thought of that morning, of how Fenrir's warm morning face had shifted into one of hurt as Harry's shaky temper cracked. He wished he could do as Draco always did and blame hormones or instincts or whatever but he knew really, it was just a fault of his character. They always squabbled, of course but it had felt different this morning – personal. Perhaps worse because he'd overreacted. Maybe. Just a bit.
Sighing heavily, Harry rested his head on a pile of books and closed his eyes. Beneath his hand, the baby kicked softly.
"I take your dramatics as a 'yes'," Severus drawled as Harry sat back in his chair to look at him.
"Maybe," Harry grumbled. "Do you…?" He chewed the inside of his cheek for a moment, a bad habit that was only growing more frequent as the stress of his nearing exams and everything else swelled. "You always tell me how it is. Do you think I've bitten off more than I can chew? Have I been…selfish in trying to do this all at once?"
"Are those the words your werewolf used?" Snape asked with a raised brow.
Looking away quickly, Harry ran his fingers thoughtfully around the edges of the stacked books before him. "Not in so many words," he said evasively. It all felt incredibly stupid now and he felt heavy in his chest at the memory of it. He sighed again. "He said he was worried I was stretched too thin."
"Ah," Snape said. The timer at his elbow turned gold then and he stirred again, clockwise this time with the pestle. Only after he'd laid it aside and extinguished the flames under the cauldron did he look at Harry. He regarded him with an expression so similar to the one Dumbledore used to give him, resigned affection and frustration. "You are an impatient little nuisance, Mr Potter," Snape said after a while of consideration. "You see what you want and you leap. Reckless to the end. You have thrown yourself in the deep end by insisting on doing all this at once, however it is just a part of your character and after five years I am assuming your wolf not only tolerates it but finds it sickeningly endearing in his own uncouth way."
The words were brutal but the tone that delivered them carried no malice. Harry felt sheepish as he glanced up cautiously into dark eyes from across the bench. "That's the advice you're giving me?" he asked dryly. "You're saying yes I was impatient and stupid but Fenrir loves me anyway?"
Snape raised a brow and approached the door to the lab, setting his hand on the ornate handle. "Quite astute of you, Potter. I would hasten to add that, if you can manage to do everything at once you will make a lot of people very proud. Would you like to know the recipe for success?"
Harry blinked, feeling stupid and eleven years old again all of a sudden. "Sir?" he said, voice a little rough with emotion.
"Balance, Mr Potter, in all things," Snape advised, moving to pull the door open, but Harry covered his hand quickly.
"Wait, there was…I mean I was thinking earlier about something and…" He hesitated. It wasn't his business, it wasn't even really his place but he knew Larentia would never ask. She would kill him, after she thanked him, maybe. Drawing in a breath for courage he blurted, "I know you've helped us a lot already with deciphering the Original Witch's ritual and making that potion for us to give people wanting to share my, errr, gift, but there's one person I can't help as easily as everyone else. There's nothing I can do to help her but I saw her earlier, I saw the way she…" He shrugged uncomfortably. "The way she looked at you. Or, the way she smelled when she looked at you was…you know?"
Snape glared and Harry frowned. "Well don't make me say it. The idea freaks me out but I know what I felt, she's…interested and you're both stubborn and self-deprecating and…" He stopped short. They both had their pasts, their loss and he felt a little childish admitting even in his head, but he wanted Snape to have someone. It seemed too unfair, too wrong that after everything he would still be alone.
"I am not even going to ask how she smelled when she looked at me, you meddlesome child but I will thank you not to set me up just because you believe I am incapable of–"
"You're not incapable, just stubborn and…loyal," Harry added softly. There didn't need to be anymore said. They knew how far to the line they could walk when it came to the subject of Lily. This was about it. Snape stared hard into Harry's face and Harry willed him to understand what he was thinking without having to say it. You don't have to be alone forever just because you loved her and she died. When Snape said nothing, did nothing, however, Harry just sighed and reached for the door handle himself.
"Just…consider it," he said, "Thank you for your advice, Sir." He headed out into the room, approaching Larentia who looked up from the book she was reading.
"All done?" she asked, rising to her feet at Harry's nod. She smiled and closed the book, turning to put it back on the shelf.
"Borrow it, if you wish," Snape said as he followed Harry into the room, passing him by and considering the spine of the book Larentia still held. "Thomas Hardy. A good choice."
Larentia's smile twisted a little at the corners and she pulled the book back to her chest. "Thank you," she said cautiously, evidently feeling almost as awkward as Harry did. "I shall be sure to let you know what I think of it."
Snape nodded and Harry thought he hadn't blushed so hard since he was a teenager as he hastened out the door.
Later, as night settled in, with Kirian tucked in bed with Ghost, Harry found himself waiting on his own bed for Fenrir, who had been absent from dinner. He was just starting to doze against his will when the door opened. Harry sat up as Fenrir entered, meeting his gaze across the room and through the voile curtain. As he moved closer, Harry knelt forward until he was on the edge of the bed and Fenrir, rather than stop short just knew. He knew to halt just before him and fluidly reach down for him just as Harry reached up, catching his neck and bringing their lips together, firm but sweet.
"Sorry," Harry breathed against those lips, even as they continued to meld together, wet and warm, Fenrir's hands sliding up his back and pulling him in so that the only space between them was that required by his stomach. "I'm such a twat, I'm so sorry," Harry gasped and Fenrir answered him with a growl, breaking their kiss and staring down at him with blue eyes that were so bright at that moment they were startling.
"You're a great dad to Kirian. You always have been, don't ever say any different," Fenrir said firmly, sliding a hand to stroke his stomach. "And don't ever walk away from me in anger again."
Harry shook his head, eyes fluttering shut as he rested his head under Fenrir's chin and just breathed. "How do you put up with me?" he asked into the stubbly throat, grazing the flesh with his lips. It smelled good. He whined softly and Fenrir echoed it.
"I s'pose I must love you," Fenrir grunted. "It's not too much of a hardship."
Harry laughed and bit gently.
A sharp hiss dragged from Harry's lips, hand flying to his stomach that was round enough now that he was sitting at an awkward angle at the table. All eyes in the Great Hall flew to him and Harry shifted uncomfortably, massaging his stomach. "It seems really active lately," Romilda said brightly as she popped a chip into her mouth.
"Right in the kidney that one," he groused good-naturedly, before pulling at the top two buttons of his shirt as a hot flush began to burn through him. He resisted the urge to push his own plate of chips away from him though. He needed food. The baby needed food. And he was nervous.
"Maybe it's nervous about the first exam too," Terry put in with a grin. "Reckon it knows you're going to chunder at the sight of the Potions Theory."
Katie swatted him hard. "Don't listen to him, Harry. You've spent more time studying than I remember even Hermione Granger doing."
Harry doubted that but he knew what she meant and nodded as he continued with his chips. "I just want to do alright, that's all. I have to," he said. So many people had expected so much of him and while that wasn't the only reason he was doing this, he wanted to make them proud. Fenrir, Snape, McGonagall, Dumbledore, his parents, Sirius, all of them, wherever they were.
"I think I'll feel better when all of them are over," he said, shoving the last few of his chips between his slice of bread and taking a big bite.
"But then it'll be over and we'll have to leave Hogwarts again, Romilda said solemnly and Harry felt his mouthful sink into his belly a little too heavily. Even with the stress, he had enjoyed being at Hogwarts again. It would be difficult to let it go. He would still visit Snape, McGonagall and Hagrid, of course but still…
The bell rang and Harry wolfed down his last few bites as they all stood. They had to vacate the hall while the desks were set for their first exam. As he left the hall, however he was sure Snape gave him a look that inspired such confidence that he felt just a little less sick.
When he opened his paper with a feeling of dread, Harry stopped. Read the brewing instructions for Felix Felicis below and correct the two disastrous mistakes therein. He smiled to himself. It was going to be alright. He started writing; his little bump thumping more gently against his stomach this time.
"Busy week?" Fenrir asked as he walked into the den a week later. It was dinner time but Harry was curled up in front of their own private fire in the den with his food, the pillows plush and comforting around him.
"Last exam is Monday," Harry said, eating his steak with relish. He saw Fenrir smirk at the euphoric expression on his face as he sat just in front of him, pulling Harry's feet into his lap.
"Nearly there," he growled softly, pressing his thumb into the arch of Harry's foot. They didn't hurt so much, but they'd swollen a little as he neared the end of his pregnancy and the firm kneading felt so good Harry groaned again around his mouthful. Fenrir chuckled and continued. "You're eating lots, I like it."
Harry feigned a glare. "Your child is a gannet," he said by way of excuse as he pierced another section of steak, catching some mash on the way. "Are we still going to Eithne when Kirian has finished dinner?"
With a smile, Fenrir nodded. He was quietly thoughtful for a moment before he said, "If you'd wanted more…'wizarding' things to do about the baby you should've said so, you know. We've gone past the point where I begrudge all things wizard."
"It's not that at all," Harry said simply, setting his now empty plate aside and laying both hands on his four-and-a-half-month pregnant belly. "I didn't realise I wanted it until Eithne mentioned it. And then Romilda and Katie, they wanted to know if we'd had a scan and the idea…sort of stuck." They lay silently like that together for some time, enjoying the crackle of the fire, Harry's feet tingling pleasantly.
"Eithne made the new baby a blanket, you know, since Kirian is still…partial to his," Harry said, wriggling his toes. He could've sworn he felt the baby do the same and rubbed gently over the spot, secretly savouring the way Fenrir's eyes blazed warm and gentle when he saw. Just for him.
"How are you feeling?" Fenrir asked after the comfortable silence and foot rub had lulled Harry into a slumped position against the cushions, eyes closed.
Harry's eyes flew open as he jerked back from a doze. "Hmm?" he asked ineloquently.
Fenrir smirked. "Around this time with Kirian you started behaving…oddly. You're not feeling anything like that?"
"I don't really remember a lot of it," he admitted sheepishly, "the instincts just sort of…took over, you know? I suppose it'll take over when I'm ready." He wondered if it would be different at all without the pressure of Voldemort and the rogue pack bearing down on him. He wasn't sure. He remembered turning into a wolf and lunging at Conall like a possessed demon vividly even now and swore he could feel blood filling his mouth at the memory. He swallowed hard.
"it'll be fine this time," Fenrir promised pushing his feet off his lap to crawl over him, hands cradling his stomach either side of Harry's and nose pressing against his neck. "It'll be ours and it'll be the way it was meant to be."
Harry nodded slowly, eyes closed as that mouth slid up to his tenderly, easing away the apprehension and anxiety that Harry hadn't even felt brewing until it was choking him. "I've enjoyed it this time round," Harry admitted, "I know it's had the usual ups and downs but it's felt…good. I don't know why I'm so worried when nothing is wrong," Harry mumbled.
Fenrir leant back enough to meet his gaze fully. "Because you like to have everything under control and this is one thing you can't," he said easily, without hesitating and Harry knew it was true. That was the beauty of their connection. It wasn't a stream of the other's conscious thoughts just…a feeling. Things that only years together could teach them.
"Did I miss it?!" An excited shriek sounded as the door opened and Kirian flew in, Ghost hot on his heels and a cool summer's evening draft following after. Harry beamed at Kirian's enthusiasm, pulling his shoes on as Fenrir pulled Kirian up onto his shoulders.
"Are we still going?" Kirian demanded eagerly. "Come on. I want to see the baby!" His little hands gripped Fenrir's hands that held his legs and wriggled like a child riding a horse that was trying to make it go faster.
"It'll still be there whether we take five minutes or half hour, Kiri," Harry mused, but his excitement was infectious and a bit of a relief too. He'd been worried Kirian would feel pushed out or jealous but he seemed more interested since he'd been able to start feeling his sibling move. As if it'd made it more understandable. More real.
Fenrir went first with Kirian and then Harry followed with Ghost. When he stepped through the floo, Eithne was waiting, setting aside her knitting at the first flare of the flames and now reaching for Kirian, who all but leapt into her arms and squeezed her before dropping down to the floor. "Will I be able to see inside your belly?" Kirian asked as Harry brushed soot off himself.
"You certainly will, that's the beauty of magic," Eithne said warmly. "But let's get your father comfortable first. It's tiring work, growing an entire person." She gestured toward Harry, who flushed a little but smiled at Kirian's confused frown. He gripped Ghost's fur thoughtfully as if for support before reaching for Harry's hands, tugging him toward the closest armchair.
"Come on Dad. You need to rest," he said, backing up as urged Harry into the chair as if he were an old cripple.
"I'm alright, don't listen to your Gran. I'm fit as a fiddle," Harry assured him. "Just a bit tired, that's all." He watched as Kirian nodded resolutely, but with a determined, protective edge to his expression. The bond between them seemed to have matured over the last few months, the ability Kirian had to calm him no matter what strengthening with his independence. Harry felt relaxed as Kirian dipped his head to rest his ear to Harry's stomach.
"It just sounds gurgly," he said, looking up at Harry and Fenrir with a worried face. "Are you sure it's still in there?"
Fenrir smirked, sitting on the footstool next to Harry. Eithne pulled one of the other chairs close and spread a crisp roll of parchment out on her lap, about 6 inches long. When it was flat she rested her palm on the surface and then pulled her wand out. "Let's find out, shall we?" she suggested, gesturing at Harry's stomach. Harry pulled his shirt up, only a little uncomfortable with all eyes on him.
"Feels bigger than with Kirian," he said, mostly to himself. It was still nowhere near that of a pregnant witch or muggle at full term but it was definitely a little larger than the first time. He was sure of it.
"They get bigger each time," Eithen assured him. "More room to grow. It's normal." She rested the tip of her wand against his stomach and traced a figure eight over his skin. Over and over again, slow and steady. As she did so, as they watched, a soft golden glow began to emanate from the place below her wand tip and her other palm where it was pressed to the page.
"Oh wow," Kirian whispered in awe, gripping Harry's arm excitedly as he strained up on his toes to look at the parchment. Harry couldn't take his eyes off it either. His stomach felt warm and tingly and just then, a soft kick bumped Eithne's wand. She chuckled and Harry smirked as she finished a final cycle of her wand before drawing back, holding the parchment out to them.
It had been filled with a black and white image, a moving image like a wizarding photograph except it was the baby printed on the page. It was very similar to a muggle ultrasound (the one Harry had seen of Dudley in the Dursley living room) only this had a more definite outline. Clear and crisp. He swallowed as the picture circled, the baby sucking his or her thumb before kicking up clearly and looping round again.
"There's really a person in you," Kirian breathed, staring at it. "Really really."
"Yeah," Harry said, feeling a little choked as he saw Fenrir's expression. Warm and content and at peace. Happy. Harry had given him that feeling. He was glad.
"I wish we'd have got one of Kirian," Harry said thoughtfully as he gave the picture to Kirian to look after until they got home. He seemed very important with this task and even seemed to stand a little straighter. Fenrir just gripped Harry's shoulder and brushed his nose against his ear as he stood. There was nothing that could be said about that, he supposed and it didn't really matter. Harry felt lighter than he had in weeks. Even if he did have one more exam to survive in the coming week.
"Thank you, Eithne," Harry said as he hoisted himself out of the chair, pulling his shirt back down into place. Her wrinkled face creased further with a smile.
"You're sure you don't want to know?" she asked delightfully.
Harry hesitated, then felt Fenrir squeeze his hand, a signal for him to do whatever he wanted. But still… "We'll wait. I want Fenrir to tell me what it is," he said sheepishly as she beamed knowingly.
"Just so," she said, gesturing for the fire. "Now off with you. At least two of you need your rest."
Harry sat back from his examination paper and glanced up at the hour glass trickling away at the front of the hall. Ten minutes to go. He sighed. There was literally nothing he could do now. He'd answered every question, tried to provide valid reasoning for every answer and as he met McGonagall's gaze across the room, he only hoped it would be enough. His exams were officially over. He'd find out if he'd studied hard enough in a few days.
As he stretched, rubbing at the small of his back with a wince, he saw Katie bent low over her paper still, Terry folding a spare piece of parchment into an origami shape and both Millicent and Romilda still scribbling frantically. Like his classmates from his Hogwarts days, he would see them on occasional nights at the Leaky, he supposed but after today they would no longer see each other on a daily basis. He would miss it and Hogwarts too.
When McGonagall finally called time up and they filtered outside, Harry found himself with the rest of his friends out on the lawn, spread out next to the lake where the rest of the students soon surrounded them at lunch. It was a warm, bright day and despite the bitter-sweet occasion, everything was calm. Harry glanced over to see Katie swinging her arm back, launching a pebble across the water much further than Terry's had gone a moment before. She beamed triumphantly.
"Who needs boys," she beamed, flopping down between Harry and Millicent with a broad smile. "It feels so good to know it's done." She glanced at each of them. "I will miss you though."
Harry shifted where he sat. The baby was a bit squished in his cross-legged position and he or she was shoving a little at his kidney to make him aware of this. With a wince, he leant back slightly on his hands and met Katie's gaze. "Yeah. We'll have to make sure we keep in touch," he said genuinely. "Hermione, Ron, Neville and Luna and I all have a sort of bimonthly get together at the Three Broomsticks. We should combine it all maybe."
"I hope I've got enough to get into the Healer Programme," Romilda said with a grimace. "Those last few questions were really hard…"
Terry glanced to Harry. "Do you have any idea what you want to do with all your NEWTs yet?"
With a smile and a small laugh, Harry shook his head. "Nope. I think I'll enjoy the freedom of just being 'Dad' for a while before I decide. If I get the results I want hopefully the world will be my oyster."
Millicent lay back on the dry grass, staring up at the sky. "But you'll have to pick something that suits your lifestyle, am I right? Something you can have flexible hours…."
Harry groaned. "You sound like Hermione. I sort of can't think that far ahead, not until I see what my options are anyway, grade-wise." When they said nothing more and just watched him, he added, hesitantly, "I was thinking something to do with wandlore maybe. I found it really interesting, you know?" He hadn't mentioned that to Fenrir, of course, to anyone actually and now he found himself a little insecure as he waited for his friends' response.
"That's amazing Harry," Romilda said brightly.
"Not just anyone can get into wandlore, you know. You have to have quite the passion. And connections to get in," Millicent mused. Her eyes sparkled. "Bet you won't have a problem there though." She didn't mean it in an offensive way and so Harry just rolled his eyes instead of protesting that he wouldn't accept an apprenticeship or job from someone who he thought would base it on his name. He just shook his head in fond amusement and enjoyed their company until the afternoon began to move on.
As he bid them goodbye for now, instead of walking up to the castle to use McGonagall's floo to head home, he found himself walking the grounds, losing himself in the trees and the grass, the stone circle, the wooden bridge. He was surprised to find himself on the edge of the forest in the end, staring into the trees and just…thinking. He'd had so many bad memories here, but such good ones too. It had been his first home. It had been the making of him, one way or another.
He fancied he could still see Buckbeak tethered near Hagrid's hut, or even see Dumbledore waiting on the doorstep there with his eyes twinkling. He let his hand find his stomach in search of comfort and wondered why he felt as if he were saying goodbye to a part of himself.
"Alrigh' 'Arry?" came a welcome voice from off to the side and Harry glanced up to see Hagrid coming to stand beside him. The giant put a hand on his shoulder. "You look a bi' torn up."
Harry smiled. "I blame the hormones," he said.
"Ah yeh, good idea that," Hagrid agreed. "Yeh ready for the little 'un?"
"Ready as I'll ever be," Harry replied fondly. He watched as a tawny owl swooped over the trees and their heads, heading for the owlery. "It feels weird. Like I'm leaving home for the first time, even though I'm not, even though I'll be back to see Snape and you and…" He hesitated. "I feel a bit emotional I suppose. I definitely blame the hormones."
Hagrid chuckled. "I know this was yer firs' 'ome and all tha' but yer forgettin, you've got a home now."
Harry was forced to remember that it was about this time with Kirian that he'd been torn from that home, that it was only then that he'd realised how much he loved it. It was the first home that was truly his, that no one could take him away from. Hogwarts would always be here for him to come back to, in many ways, but it wasn't home any longer. He smiled. Bittersweet.
"Yeah," he said softly. "Yeah I do."
Hagrid thumped his shoulder affectionately and Harry had to steady himself on a nearby tree to stay upright but he appreciated the gesture all the same. Hagrid had been his first friend after all. That, and the fluffy, warm fabric of Hagrid's large coat felt soft to the touch. Incredibly soft and it smelt of the trees and grass and the summer air. He felt a dazed sort of awe at the sensation of it brushing his skin and found himself patting Hagrid's arm a bit longer than was necessary, only to receive a knowing, bright-eyed look in response.
"Fancy a cuppa before ye go?" Hagrid offered brightly, looking far too much as he'd done when he'd looked at Norbert or Buckbeak for Harry's liking.
Clearing his throat awkwardly, Harry steadied himself on his feet and nodded. "Yeah, go for it."
Harry stepped through the floo with Kirian in his arms and set the boy down, stretching his back. He was surprised as both of them walked into the main area of the den to find Fenrir sitting by the fire with Ghost's head on his knee. Those piercing blue eyes found him and a smile touched the corners of that mouth.
"Long day?" Fenrir mused.
Harry smirked. "Yeah but it's done. Nothing to do but wait now. It feels good…freeing. No more stress."
"Not about exams anyway," Fenrir said, "You always find something to stress about." When Harry's lips opened to reply, however, Fenrir rose to his feet. "Anyway I'm taking Kirian to Larentia, be ready to leave in five."
Harry frowned, watching as Kirian bounced toward the door, Ghost hot on his heels. "What?" Harry asked. "I just got in."
"And now we're going back out," Fenrir said.
"We?" Harry repeated, annoyed. "I'm exhausted, Fenrir, I don't want to-" But before he could finish, Fenrir had already headed out the door with Kirian and Ghost in tow, leaving Harry alone and fuming. He scowled at the fire. He'd been looking forward to getting home and just relaxing. Just…being with Fenrir and Kirian, being at home without worrying about anything for the first time in months. He wasn't in the mood for whatever Fenrir had up his sleeves.
When Fenrir returned alone, however and tugged him toward the floo network, when they stepped out of Eithne's fire and Fenrir grabbed a fistful of powder once more, Harry's frown intensified. "What's going-?" But he never got to finish his sentence. He was pulled in tight with Fenrir and his eyes squeezed shut as the flames furled around them.
"The Burrow!" Fenrir growled and before Harry could even register his surprise, they were tumbling out of the Burrow fireplace. Fenrir steadied his shoulder but in doing so, nearly lost balance himself and smashed a few photo frames that had been on the mantel as he'd grabbed it to hold himself upright. He cursed and Harry watched with confusion as he stared down at the shards.
"I reckon the sound of destruction means they're here," came a voice and Harry looked up to see Mrs Weasley stepping into the kitchen. She beamed at him. "Harry, dear, you look wonderful." She gripped both his arms and looked him up and down, before pulling him into a tight hug.
"I doubt it; I look like I've eaten a bludger." Harry grumbled, still a little irritated and confused. "Not that I'm not happy to see you but why are we here on a Thursday night?" he asked. When Molly released him, she stroked his face before turning round to look at the mess by the fireplace. There was a moment where Fenrir stared at her, as if trying to gauge her reaction, if he should prepare to be defensive or brash or…
Molly Weasley just smiled and cheerfully flicked her wand, skilfully sending the frames and the glass fronts back into place, before sitting the frames on the mantelpiece once more. She looked so small and vulnerable next to Fenrir, so ordinary that Harry was a little astounded for a moment. They hadn't ever stood this close to each other. The pack and the Weasleys mingled on events such as Harry's birthday or Kirian's but Fenrir never got this close and it looked very peculiar.
"You wouldn't believe how many times I've had to fix our little heirlooms with seven children in the house," she chuckled good-heartedly. There was the briefest hesitation and then Fenrir's lips quirked up in one corner.
"I can, actually," he said in his usual tone.
Molly nodded, turning back to Harry again. "Well, when you're ready. We're all in the garden at the moment, more room. Hermione and Fleur helped me to set it all up."
"Set what up?" Harry asked, but she was already stepping out through the two-section stable door and into the dusky evening. Harry turned to look at Fenrir, who looked oddly thoughtful and more at ease after whatever had happened just then.
"Don't scowl at me like that," Fenrir mused, stepping forward to place his hand over Harry's stomach. As he did so, Harry tilted his head back to look at him more closely, relishing in the heat on his skin even through his shirt. "You're a right grumpy arse when you're pregnant and out of control of something," Fenrir said. Before Harry could retort, he cupped the side of Harry's throat the way he always did and moved passed him to follow Molly out the door. Harry hesitated only a moment before following after him. When he reached the doorstep, however, he stopped.
The soft, growing darkness of the Weasley's garden was broken by dozens, perhaps a hundred lanterns that hung on every tree and bush and floated above them like the candles in the Great Hall at Hogwarts. There was a small fire in the centre and gathered round it on a circle of benches, were all of the Weasleys (minus the children), Terry, Katie, Millicent, Romilda, Luna, Neville, Draco, Echo, Marrok, Amoux and Accalia. They all beamed at him as they saw him and Harry saw Mrs Weasley handing out plates of finger food and drinks.
Stunned at the intimate beauty of the moment, Harry stared at each of them in turn before letting his eyes come to rest on Fenrir. He stood just the side of the step, watching him apprehensively. Harry swallowed around the thick lump forming in his throat. "What...what's all this for?" he asked, embarrassed by the raspiness of his voice.
"For you," Fenrir said huskily, almost inaudible among the sound of laughter and warmth from the group around the fire. "And the cub, of course."
Harry understood then what this was. One of those moments where Fenrir managed to surprise him, even after five years together. A moment that Fenrir had set aside his own fears and experiences with wizards to ensure he didn't feel like he was missing out on the parts of that world that everyone else had. A little overwhelmed at the gesture, Harry nodded with understanding and together they joined the circle of friends.
The food was mouth-watering of course and to the delight of Mrs Weasley (and Fenrir), Harry had seconds. There were butterbeers and mead being passed round and Harry found the atmosphere surprisingly warm and easy despite the eclectic mix of people gathered round the fire. The lanterns glistened above as darkness fell completely, Celestina Warbeck warbling pleasantly about cauldrons full of love.
Fenrir was sprawled next to him, leaning slightly back on one arm with a flagon of mead in his other hand, talking with Bill Weasley as if he hadn't been the one to tear up his face. It was so surreal, watching Bill's scarred face twist into a smirk at Fenrir's gauche humour. It wasn't as if the past had never happened, but somehow in the last few years, they had all overcome it. It'd just been so subtle that it seemed to have happened when he wasn't looking. It was a testament to how much Fenrir and the Weasleys loved him, he supposed.
As if sensing his thoughts, Bill caught his eye and smiled. "Alright there, Harry?" he asked, clearly amused.
Harry nodded, not knowing what to say to express his gratitude for his family for accepting him, Fenrir and Kirian. He sipped his butterbeer. "Smashing," Harry shot back, surprised when Hermione, who had been sitting to his left, took the butterbeer from him and set it down out of the way. With a furrowed brow, Harry's lips parted in question but Draco cut him off by getting to his feet, shoving an elegantly wrapped parcel into Harry's hands. When Harry stared at him in confusion, Draco smirked.
"This is a tradition surely even you know, Potter?" he asked, taking his seat again and regarding him with that affectionate frustrated disbelief that had grown so familiar over the last few years. "Open it then or we shall be at this all evening."
Feeling emotional and exposed, Harry dropped his eyes to the shiny paper and pulled at one corner, tearing it away as everyone watched. A soft toy rabbit dropped into his lap, cappuccino coloured and soft. Harry ran his fingers over the fur and glanced up at Draco, who's cheeks were slightly ruddy with awkwardness.
"A bunny for a werewolf cub, Malfoy?" Ron asked.
"It's perfect," Harry said to Draco before he could reply defensively. As further testament of this, he kept it in what remained of his lap as Hermione handed him her gift. Not a book, oddly enough, but a set of oils in ornate vials, some for him and for baby, apparently, according to the elegant note attached. He smiled. This was how it was supposed to be, this was what he'd missed before, he realised, glancing up at Fenrir as he started to unwrap Fleur's and Bill's present to him. He'd missed being surrounded by his family, celebrating this miracle he'd been gifted with.
Fenrir's hand settled at the small of his back and he smiled, quiet but content, Harry could feel it. It was so good it made him feel a little giddy as he thanked Fleur and Bill for their gift and opened a miniature Molly Weasley jumper next.
"The stitch work is charmed, the initial will appear when you give him or her a name," Molly said brightly. The soft wool was a tasteful muted yellow. Kirian had a navy blue one already. Harry stared at the fabric for a long time, running his fingers over the tiny garment. It took him so long to say anything that Fenrir did so for him.
"Thank you. It's…perfect." The smoothness to his voice was so warm that Harry glanced between him and Molly for a moment. Fenrir's eyes locked with his, the hand behind him brushing against his back subtly. He was torn from the intimate moment by the next present landing in his lap and Fred and George beginning a tipsy verse of 'Beat Back Those Bludgers, Boys, and Chuck That Quaffle Here'.
The evening was one of the best Harry had ever experienced in his entire life. By the time Luna started to fall asleep in her butterbeer, signalling the end of the night, Harry was exhausted but smiling still, filled to bursting with affection from the people around him. Fenrir took the generous pile of presents through the floo first, leaving Harry to say his goodbyes. As he moved to follow Fenrir through the floo, Hermione set her hand on his shoulder.
"I've never seen you look so happy, you know?" she said, eyes shining, only slightly inebriated. "Your two families mixing together as if there were no reason they shouldn't. As if the war never happened…it is pretty special, I think."
Harry nodded, throat tight. He wasn't sure how to put what he felt for each of them into words. Ron was watching from the doorway, silently agreeing with his wife, supporting him without words that they both found too hard to decipher. In the end, Harry covered Hermione's hand with his. "It is special," he agreed. "I don't think I ever dared to hope for even half this much when I was a kid."
Hermione, apparently overcome by the occasion and the booze, welled up. "Everyone loves you so much, Harry. And Fenrir, he adores you and Kirian and…oh, Harry I'm just so proud of you, so happy." She threw her arms round his neck and squeezed him. When she eventually pulled back, Ron was beside them and squeezing Harry's shoulder.
"See you soon, mate," he said and Harry gave him a nod and a tired smile, stepping into the fire.
He'd barely dusted himself off before he found himself wrapped in strong arms that practically lifted him up into a desperate kiss. It wasn't sexual in his ferocity, but hungry, needy. He felt thick fingers card through his hair and hummed softly, gripping Fenrir's shoulders as he drew back to consider his face. Staring into ferocious blue eyes, Harry let his fingers brush his mate's stubbly chin thoughtfully.
There was so much he felt, so much he wanted this man to know, to thank him for, but as always, the both of them found words difficult and awkward at best. In the end, he smiled softly. His face was starting to hurt from all the smiling.
"Five years and you're still surprising me," he said. With tonight, with the kiss, with caring for him in spite of everything. It was still startling sometimes to see such love and devotion in the face of such a powerful man. He wondered if Fenrir felt that same way about him. "Draco once asked if there was anything you wouldn't do for me," he said lightly.
Fenrir smirked. "We've got a long time to find out."
To Be Continued…
