Carly had difficulties falling asleep that night. Every time she closed her eyes, she just saw Aloise lying in that coffin. After a few hours, she decided that she wouldn't even try to sleep anymore. Instead, she put on the worn out slippers by her bed and quietly left her room at the Institute. She had no idea where to go, but somehow she ended up at the door to Alec Lightwood's room. When she saw the light under the door, telling her that Alec was awake, she slowly knocked. It only took a few seconds before he opened, still in his white funeral suit. His blue eyes were full of despair.
"Hey, I'm sorry to bother you this late, but do you have a moment?", Carly blurted out.
Alec nodded slowly and took a step back, allowing Carly to enter. The room looked very neat, like it always did when Carly had visited, which was not often. After Magnus and Alec had split up, the latter had moved back to the Institute with his three children.
"How are you?", Alec asked, before sitting down on the edge of his bed.
The bed looked like it had been untouched for days. Carly carefully sat down next to him.
"I don't know. Okay, I guess.", she answered.
Alec nodded. They sat quietly for a long while, before Carly decided to ask what she had been wondering since she first saw Alec after Aloise had died.
"How do you survive? I mean… when you lost your brother, Max? And then Magnus? How did you…", she started, but Alec interrupted her.
"I really think you should get back to bed, Carly. You need some sleep."
There was a sudden anger in his voice, and his eyes. But he didn't sound mad at her, he seemed… mad at himself. Carly just wanted to hug him, but she knew that he wouldn't like it, so she just stood up and walked toward the door. Just before she left, she heard Alec speak to her. She barely heard him, but she couldn't avoid his words.
"If you're going through hell, keep going."
Carly didn't answer him.
The morning sun touched lightly on the eyes of Elaine Lightwood. She yawned and pressed her pillow over her head, blocking the light from blinding her. She needed twelve more hours of sleep. At least. But a slight knock on the door prevented her from pursuing her dreams.
"Yes?", she asked, still with the pillow covering her face.
The door opened, and Elaine recognized the sound of her mother's stiletto heels on the stone floor.
"There is something your father and I have to tell you.", Isabelle said.
Elaine took the pillow from her head and sat up, pulling the cover around her bare shoulders. What could they possibly have to say that was so important, the day after Aloise's funeral?
"Then where is he?", Elaine asked.
"He's with Clary. She really needs her parabatai right now.", her mother answered.
Of course Clary needed Simon, and of course was Simon there for her. That was how it always had been, and always would be, Elaine knew.
"What was it you wanted to tell me?"
Isabelle smiled, looked down at her left hand and then back up. Elaine followed her gaze, and stopped breathing. On Isabelle's left hand, there was a big diamond ring.
"Your father and I are getting married!", Isabelle exclaimed with a laugh.
She looked so happy, Elaine hadn't seen her mother look like that in what felt like forever. Elaine couldn't help but smile. She was also happy. Her parents had been together since a few years before Elaine was born, and neither of them had ever popped the question. She was beginning to feel excited, there was so much to prepare for the now upcoming wedding! Finally, there was something to celebrate around here, Elaine thought. But then she felt guilty. It was the day after her parabatai Carly's sister's funeral. This was not a day for celebration. This was a day for grieving and remembering.
"We want a mix between a Shadowhunter and a mundane wedding, and we want you to be the maid of honor, if you want to."
Elaine forgot everything about Carly and Aloise. Instead, she smiled and ran to hug her mother. They cried in each other's arms, tears of love, grief and hope.
Carly didn't leave her bed that day, and not the day after that either. When she heard the news that Isabelle and Simon were getting married, she just wished them good luck and held back the tears. Elaine visited her a few times, and so did Florian and Blythe. They tried to cheer her up, but it didn't succeed. After that, they tried to talk her into joining them for training. After that failed, they just sat there and kept saying that everything would be okay. It wasn't until five days later that she got some interesting new. It was Jace who delivered them. Her father came in, kissed her on her forehead and took one of her hands. She just wanted to cry. She loved her father so much, and she couldn't stand seeing him so heartbroken. It broke her heart even more.
"I have some news for you, besides from the engagement.", he said, and Carly could see that even though his soul was hurting from losing one of his daughters, he was genuinely happy for Simon and Isabelle. He wasn't always Simon's biggest fan, but those two had grown to love each other like brothers.
"What is it?", Carly asked faintly.
"You know the attack on the New Jersey Institute?"
Carly was familiar with it. It was in that battle Aloise had been killed, when she was on a mission there. A mission Carly had been supposed to go on…
"Yeah…", Carly said and shared a look with Jace.
He swallowed and took a deep breath, but continued.
"The Carstairs family, who was running the Institute, got killed. Everyone except their son and his parabatai, a girl the family took in when she lost her parents. They are to be moved here.", Jace announced. Carly didn't say anything, she just nodded and waited for Jace to leave. When he did, she rushed up and ran to her desk. In the top drawer, she found her stack of old diaries. She looked for the one she had been writing in when she was thirteen. When she found it, she opened it and looked for his name. It was on almost every page. Carly blushed in embarrassment. She had known his name since she was little, but when she met him she had fell in love with him, and had had the biggest crush on him ever from the ages of thirteen to fourteen. He had barely noticed her, and why would he? He was someone everyone everyone had hear of. He was Ludwig Carstairs, and she was just Carly Herondale, always in the shadow of either her famous parents or her beautiful and talented sister. But her beloved sister Aloise was dead now. And Ludwig was coming here, to the New York Institute, Carly's home.
