He gazed down on Elrohir as he lay sleeping. It did not seem real, that he was here, that they were together, after these weeks...months of believing he was out of reach.

He was tempted to touch him, to wake him simply to spend time with him, to touch, to talk, but he resisted.

Elrohir was tired, shattered from his brothers revelations yesterday. He would let him sleep. The first rays of the sun were just appearing, he had time for a walk, to rejoice in the beauty of the new day, and still be back before Elrohir woke.

He went to the sea as he always did, but this time it was not because he needed it to soothe his soul, Elrohir had already done that. Instead he stood on the sand dunes and remembered. He remembered the Legolas who had last stood here at this beach, watching the ship sail in which bore his love. Watching with an idealism that believed Elrohir would arrive and repair everything. The years of grief and sadness would vanish, would lift off his shoulders at the sight of him, as Elrohir had somehow dragged his soul through that night...the night Aragorn had left him forever.

It hadn't been that easy.

But he was not that Legolas now. Elrohir had filled him with a joy he had forgotten existed, but he had had to wade through a mire of depression to get there. He still had a long way to go and he no longer believed Elrohir was the answer, he was a support, a stepping stone, his hope, his love, but not the answer.

He glanced down the beach then and noticed he was not alone. It was Elladan who stood in the shallows, wind whipping at his hair. He wondered why Elladan would come to the sea?

He had to find out.

"Elladan? Are you well?" He touched him on the shoulder as he approached him, for he found himself suddenly filled with concern.

"Yes." Elladan finally turned to look at him, "I was thinking. I have discovered this is a good place to think."

"It can be a dangerous place to think," Legolas frowned, he had found that out to his cost...to his father's cost, he shuddered to think what would have happened had his uncle not discovered him that day at Tirion.

"You do not have to worry about me." Elladan sounded confident, but Legolas had said that himself before and knew it for a lie.

"How is Elrohir?" He saw the guilt flood Elladan's face as he asked the question.

"He is sleeping...he is well I think, but confused...he struggles to understand you, I don't think he is used to that." He smiled trying to ease the other's burden.

"I have hurt him."

"Yes but which of us has not hurt someone, I am realising I have hurt many. We are none of us perfect. You will mend this. You can not change it but you can repair it."

Elladan smiled,

"You are very insightful today!"

"I can be," was his reply, "I have spent too long thinking only of myself and my woes, not enough thinking of others. I need to return to my father I think for I have much to make amends over with him. I am realising I have been selfish, I have taken all and given nothing, I have worried him and he deserves better from me."

"He will be happy just to see you happy, I think... and are you? I know Elrohir certainly is. He is transformed when he speaks of you."

"I have discovered I was running from the one thing which could save me. I was so afraid of losing him when I should have been afraid of never allowing myself to love him."

"Elrohir cannot save you, Legolas!" Elladan's face is tense with concern.

"I know that," He said and he did now, "But he will be the rock behind me when I fall, the cushion on which I land. He will help me to save myself. I know I have to do the work."

He remembered something then,

"Have you found your love? Did your parents know of her whereabouts? Have they heard of her?"

"No. She is not here, they know that for sure. There is no happy ending in which I discover she has been here all along, Legolas."

Elladan is thoughtful then,

"Father has a theory, I think it will interest you as much as it does me."

Legolas was not much in the mood for Elrond's theories but he decided he would listen to make Elladan happy.

"He thinks Caliel has not returned from the halls, not because she is not ready, or because she does not wish to but because I am not ready for her. He thinks I must heal, learn from my mistakes, only then will we be reunited."

"What do you have to heal from?" He was astonished, Elladan was the most calm, the most balanced person he knew. What would be so bad as to keep him apart from the one he loved?

"I have been lying to myself all along." Elladan said matter of factly. "It wasn't my family who could not accept my love, they all would have welcomed her with open arms, all of them. It was me, I hid behind them as an excuse...a reason for my actions but I was the one who was ashamed. I need to understand that...I need to accept that before we can be together. I do not want to repeat that mistake. Did I even truly love her then, for she really was? I know I do now. But I wonder if she knew it...all along that I could not truly accept her."

A thought occurred to Legolas then, a sudden brilliant thought.

"You think my mother is waiting for me, waiting for me to heal, to deal with my grief? Do you think she wants to return and it is I who prevent it because I am floundering, yet she loves me truly?"

"You know she loves you Legolas. Think on this, it makes sense. It makes sense to me."

"It does..." It was an exhilarating, uplifting, moment of discovery.

"I can do this" He smiled at Elladan, "I can do this Elladan!"

"Of course, we both can, but do it for yourself, to be happy Legolas, not simply to see her again. Let Elrohir help you but not do it for you."

He took Elladan's hand then,

"We will be reunited with them once again. I know it. You and I both."

"You and I both" Elladan repeated, "One day it will happen."

...

He slept late. The sun woke him eventually as it's rays fell across his eyes.

"You have slept long, I thought you would never wake!"

Legolas smiled at him from where he sat cross-legged on the bed beside him.

"Why did you not wake me?" He cried.

"Because I thought you needed sleep. I was just about to, I must admit I was getting bored."

Legolas seemed to him particularly buoyant, as he had not been for some time, since they had been in Arda even.

"You are in a good mood," he said tentatively.

"I have been walking, I met Elladan on the beach."

"You went to the sea again Legolas?" He sighed, for some reason that idea made him melancholy, that hold the sea had over his lover that drew him back to it time and time again.

"To remember," Legolas leaned towards him earnestly, "To remember how far I have come since I was last here."

Before he could respond Legolas was up and gone. One minute he was there, the next, heading out the door. He was confused with this new, energetic Legolas who reminded him strongly of the Legolas he had spent so much time watching during the War of the Ring and after, a Legolas he had not seen for years.

"I bought you this," he grinned as he re-entered the room with a tray laden down with breakfast. Every food imaginable was there.

"I realised I did not know your favourite, that is something I need to remedy."

"Legolas, you did not need to do this," he protested.

"I wanted to. We have been so long apart and at odds...I wanted to do something for you. This morning can be a new start for us."

"I can never eat all this!"

"Then I will help you." Obviously nothing was going to get Legolas down this morning, indeed he cheerfully helped himself to the food, smiling at Elrohir as he did so.

He wondered what had happened to change him so dramatically, he wondered if he could trust this change.

"Why so happy?" He was almost afraid to ask, afraid it would disappear.

Legolas looked genuinely surprised at his question.

"I am with you."

He was uneasy with that answer, it felt too much weight, too much responsibility for Legolas's happiness to rest solely on his shoulders.

"It cannot be just me." He meant he did not wish it to be.

"Well of course," Legolas's smile was wide. "The day is glorious, you need to get out in it Elrohir, the sun on my shoulders made my soul sing...but you are a big part of it. Do you not want to be?" His face creased with a frown.

He took a deep breath, he did not want to say this but he felt he had to.

"I do not want to be the only reason for your happiness. It frightens me. I have seen you in the depths of despair and I do not want it to be me who sends you there again." He took his hand, it was important Legolas understood this.

"I love you. I have for a long time, long before that night. Why do you think I sought you out when you disappeared that day? I knew you were grieving and I was afraid for you. But I am not perfect, I am a long way from being so and I do not want to be the fulcrum upon which your happiness depends, because I will fail you."

"You will not fail me." How could Legolas be so certain?

"Do not worry Elrohir, this is about more than you. I feel as if a load has been lifted from my shoulders, I feel as if the sun shines today just for me alone. I can see through my clouds and there is something to reach for! But you...you do make me happy, I am sorry that frightens you, but I cannot change it. I never thought we would achieve this, I thought you were beyond my reach, yet today we will spend together, you and I. Love makes me happy Elrohir. I know I still have much work to do. I know there are hard days ahead of me, I do not expect you to fix it all for me, not any more. It is enough you will be there."

He reached up and took something out of his pocket.

"There is something I wished to ask you, you said when I was last here we would read this together. You said you would tell me of him. I am ready now to hear it."

And he laid across Elrohir's lap a letter, the letter he had carried across the sea to Legolas from Eldarion.

Elrohir picked it up in surprise, he had not expected this. It was warm and well creased. Had Legolas carried this with him everywhere? He opened it and the words danced in front of his eyes. Words written by a boy he had nurtured whose father he had loved as a brother. He had watched them both age and die. He brushed his hand over them. Eldarion had written this, Eldarion's hand had rested here. If only he could touch that hand again. His emotions were on edge following his brothers revelations and the joy of simply being with Legolas. Unbidden he felt the tears fill his eyes for Eldarion was gone beyond his reach and Aragorn and Arwen before him. Before he could control himself he was weeping.

"Forgive me," he gasped looking at Legolas's startled, horrified face, "It is just, I miss them. I miss them all. I am sorry."

Then Legolas's arms were around him, pulling him down against his chest, he was engulfed with warmth and calm, he could hear his lovers heartbeat thudding in his ear and it filled him with peace.

"I miss them too Elrohir, I miss them too. We will do this together, you and I, and Elladan too for he feels it also. You are not alone with this. None of us are alone."

I am not alone, he thought and that thought began to melt away a portion of the lump of ice in his chest.

"Let me tell you of when Gimli and I stole Eldarion away for a midnight feast and his nursemaid had the whole castle looking for him!" Legolas's bright laughter washed over him. "Arwen was beside herself and Aragorn was so angry. He did not talk to us civilly for days, why they did not come to us straight away I will never know. It would have saved them so much time. I was an irresponsible woodelf who should never be let near children, he told me." Legolas' giggling at the memory was infectious.

"I have not thought of this for years!"

Elrohir smiled and pulled back so he could see his lovers face.

"Tell me more," He said for Legolas had spent far more time with his brother in those last years than he, had far more stories, and suddenly he was hungry for them.

And so he did.

They laughed and cried and remembered together, Legolas told him stories of Eldarion's youth and Aragorn's kingship, he in turn spoke of the young man who was king after Legolas had sailed and as the morning went on that cold, blue ice in his chest slowly faded away.

Then only the love remained.