The Incredibles

All's Fair in Love and Glory

Chapter Two: "It's a Date"

Sitting at the kitchen table, Helen struggled to occupy Jack-Jack and read the classified ads in the newspaper simultaneously. She groaned as the phone rang, slightly muted by the stack of papers surrounding it. Nonchalantly, she flung her arm to full extension to get it.

"Parr residence."

"Oh. Helen," a voice said, warm but hesitant.

"Mirage," Helen replied slowly, wondering if her voice sounded accusing.

"Is this a bad time? I can call back later," she added hastily.

"No, it's all right."

"Look, Helen…" Mirage paused to clear her throat. "I, ah, know we got off on the wrong foot, but I was just trying to help—"

"And you did," Helen interrupted, trying to muster up as much friendliness as she could towards the woman who had almost ruined her and Bob's marriage. "Bob said he was being paid for a little while, and you helped us get off the island." Even though you put us on it, she added silently.

"Nothing happened. Please believe me," Mirage pleaded.

Aggravated, Helen bit back a string of insults.

"Why are you calling us, Mirage?"

The frail young woman didn't speak for a moment. "Just to see how everything was, I suppose," she said finally.

"We're getting along," Helen replied shortly, reaching for Jack-Jack as he started to fuss.

Mirage's tone changed suddenly.

"Well, if you ever had a change of heart about me, I would love to have you back here. All of you."

"What?" Helen spluttered. "I mean, the kids have school, and Bob's looking for a job…"

"He can get one here!" Mirage chirped. "It's perfect."

Helen sucked in her breath sharply. Jack-Jack cooed his approval.

"I'll see what I can do," she sighed.

Returning to her professional state, Mirage said, "Wonderful. I'll call you back tomorrow at, say, two in the afternoon?"

"Bob should be home by then," Helen mused. "It's a date."

"Thank you, Mrs. Incredible. It was lovely talking to you."

Helen said good-bye, and hung up with a snort. She looked at Jack-Jack.

"Who does she think she is?"

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Violet walked down the hall, clutching her schoolwork and feeling rather alone. She had reverted to her previous stage of solitude, her hair, unhindered by a headband, free to hide her forehead. She was standing by herself, only to be met by a shadowy figure at the other end of the hall...

"Tony!" she cried, dropping her books and whipping off her backpack. "You came for me."

"Well, of course I did," he answered.

His voice didn't even crack!

In slow motion, they began to run towards each other, focused only on the other even as their shoes squeaked across the tile floor.

When they met, he pulled her into his strong arms and they began to kiss passionately.

She awoke with a jolt, her head jerking up from its plae on her folded arms. Crap. It wasn't like her to have romantic fantasies. Crap.

Rubbing her eyes, she realized that her teacher was calling attendance - as she always did, after forgetting to do so at the beginning of class. Lucky for her, her name was near the end of the roll sheet, and her teacher was still at the B's.

I'm awake. She stretched, sleepily. Barely.

Tony was really changing her. When it had just been a crush, it was one thing. But now, when they'd gone tot he movies, and he'd asked her to, officially, be his girlfriend... and she'd said yes... well, that was another thing altogether. She'd said yes, all right - and gone crazy promptly thereafter. Gone crazy for him, that is. She sighed. All it had taken was one date.

Sneaking a glance at him, she tried to keep from melting as he gave her a little smile.

Get it together, Vi! You wear the pants in this relationship.

She straightened up as the teacher said her name.

"Violet Parr?"

"Right here. Same as always," she added.

Her voice was clear and strong.

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A few blocks away from Violet lay Dash's elementary school. Her brother was having a similar dilemma. But for different reasons.

Standing up at the front of the room was the girl he considered a goddess.

All it had taken to convince him of such was their chance meeting at the department store, where he had been school shopping - or trying to get out of doing so - and seen her in his hiding place. She was such a clever little girl to find him, and even though she had given him away, he had to forgive her. She was just... so... cute. And sweet. And pretty.

Carissa McClain.

He rolled the name around in his mouth like candy. It seemed just as sweet. He closed his eyes and smiled dreamily, wishing desperately that he could enfold her perfect little hand into his own...

"Dash!"

His buddy Bryce was kicking him insistently under their shared desk, snickering.

"What?" he snapped.

"You like Carissa, huh?"

Dash's wild eyes popped wide open and he reached forward to clamp his hand over Bryce's big mouth.

"What do you know?"

Bryce rolled his eyes. The message taken, Dash removed his hand to permit speech.

"Just that you've been saying her name overandoverandover--"

"Iget it," Dash hissed. "Now shut up!"

Unfortunately for him, Dash had picked a friend who was as clever as he.

"Orwhat?" came the taunting reply.

Now it was Dash's turn to roll his eyes. His store of comebacks was all but empty. He sighed and returned a rather lame, "Or else."

"You're a loser," Bryce snorted. "But hey... nice choice."

Dash's cheeks flamed with anger.

With Bryce now listening to Carissa's presentation, he followed suit. It was an elaborate report, on the solar system, that seemed to far exceed the standard fourth grade project in his opinion. But then, Carissa was definitely not the standard fourth grade girl. And that wasn't just his opinion. Many other boys agreed.

Which could pose a problem.

There was only one thing left to do at the prospect of facing formidable competitors vying for Carissa's affection, and that was to be the first to get it.

Digging around in his backpack, Dash finally found he didn't care to eat. It clearly had better purposes, anyway. And since he didn't know what to do, he did the only thing that elementary school boys know how to do to get a little girl's attention...

...he threw something.

Feeling guilty immediately after throwing the piece of fruit, Dash still had to compliment himself on his excellent marksmanship. There was now a perfectly shaped stain (if a stain could be perfect in any fashion) on Carissa's poster.

Pleased with himself and the ensuing chaos, he sat back to let it unfold. Those who had observed the magnificent splat seemed in awe, if not at least impressed. But no one could pinpoint the thrower of the projectile, seeing as, firstly, everyone had been utterly consumed by the presentation, and secondly, Dash's arm - like most of him - moved with inconceivable speed. This meant, to his slight disappointment, that Carissa did not know who had caused the clamor. But she might look his way and he could show her the smile he'd been practicing at home in the mirror...

"What was that?" someone wondered aloud.

The new teacher who was replacing Mr. Kropp (who had recently quit) looked even more distressed than Carissa, who as trying bravely not to cry (she was cute when she was trying not to cry, Dash noted).

"That, children, was a very well-thrown something-or-other, probably by someone jealous of Carissa's lovely poster." Her voice quavered with fury.

Her poster's not the lovely one, Dash thought.

One of the stranger boys in the class approached the poster, stuck his finger on it, and licked the finger.

"Raisin," the kid announced.

"No," the teacher decided, narrowing her eyes. "It was too big. I'd say it was a... was a... date."

Well, well, well, Dash thought. How very appropriate.