Chapter 8
Leo
I can feel myself panting, my heart racing and pounding in my chest. I try to open my eyes, but I'm met with failure. All I see is darkness. I feel cold and my breaths start speeding up as I feel like I'm falling. Nothing is beneath my feet, just air and the cruel colour of black. I can't see anything except my hands in front of my face.
I land. I expect pain to go shooting through my body, but it never comes. I relax my muscles, stop bracing myself. I must be dreaming. I thought to myself as I stagger to my feet. I squint my eyes to look around, but I can't see anything. It's like I'm trapped in a room of darkness, the endless walls stained with the shade of black. Goes as far as the eye can see.
I try to call out. But no sound comes out of my mouth. The words I want to say, just stay as thoughts in my head.
Hello? I wanted to shout but the thought stuck inside of me. It was like talking to myself but with no sound. Just standing here, thinking to myself. Well just standing around waiting will get me nowhere. I decide to walk.
If someone was watching me, it would seem I am just walking in place. I feel panic rising within me. I pick up my pace and start to run. I'm desperate. I want to get out. I don't know where I am or what happened. I'm trapped. Trapped in my own mind? I don't know. At this point, I don't know anything anymore.
I run fast, grunting slightly. The breath is escaping my lungs as I go too fast. I need to slow down. But I also need to get out of here, I need to escape. I have to get back to my brothers. Then, I remember. I don't have to get back to my brothers, they don't need me. They sent me away...no, I sent myself away.
I stop running and clutch my head. I'm trying to remember how I came to be, trapped in this haunting world of darkness. Useless as a wilting flower striving for life, begging for water. But can't do anything about it. I'm hopeless, like a burnt out star just waiting to be wished upon. I can't do anything but wait.
Why am I here? Once again the words are caught in my throat. Stuck in my mind, unable to speak. Hello? Is anyone here? Hello!? Panic consumes me again as I continue to run, I decide to remember why I'm here later, all I want is to get out. I try to cry out for help, Hello!? Anyone!? Please! Help me!
No one answers, no one is here to read my thoughts. I'm all alone. I'm just about ready to give up. I don't know how long I've been running, how long I've been stuck in here. I'm just about ready to give up. I can feel myself fading, the hope draining from my body. I want to break down and cry, just to nothing but let it all out. I'm just about ready to give up. But somethings stopping me, I don't cry. I hate crying. Crying is weakness, and I can't be weak. I'm their fearless leader. I can't be weak or scared of anything. Fear is weakness.
I drop to my knees. I'm tired beyond explanation. My eyes feel heavy and I'm just about ready to collapse. But this is my own mind right? This is where I am trapped? There's no such thing as an endless room of nothing but darkness. This has to be my imagination. Am I going insane?
I leaned my head back, looking up at a blank sky, roof, whatever. Just darkness. I can feel tears forming in my eyes and a lump rising in my throat. I feel helpless. But I don't let them fall. I swallow back my emotions and tuck them away deep inside me. Save them for another time.
I feel lost. The black is so close yet far. I feel as if I can reach up and touch it. What does it feel like? Darkness? The black empty void of my mind? What does it feel like against my skin. Hot? Cold? Warm to the touch? Or freeze to the bone?
I close my eyes. I brace myself. I don't know for what. Just...something. I brace myself, ready to give up. Whatever happens next, I don't care. No matter what direction I travel in, I end up nowhere. Just back in the place I started in. Everything looks the same. I don't know where I am. But I do know one thing. I'm ready to give up. Or...at least I thought I was. But something caught my eye, a light.
Hope flickers inside me as I now look straight ahead. A beautiful, breath taking light is just ahead of me. It looks like a tunnel. There's two. A tunnel of light and right next to it, a tunnel of darkness. I don't know how or why I can see these tunnels, but I can. And that's all I need to know. Is one of these tunnels my way out? I can't help but think. Just when all hope seem lost, something always comes.
I stumble upon my feet. I'm drawn to these tunnels, specifically the light tunnel. The beautiful white light is blinding...but I can't help to stare at it. I feel like it's calling out to me. I take a step forward, the light grows stronger. I can hear it's wisps of wonder and calls of delight. The light feels warms as it radiates against my skin. I can't help but smile. For once in a long time, I can smile. Not worrying about anything. Seeing this glowing ember of light, makes me happy. I forget any troubles. I can't even remember why I was sad in the first place.
I take another step. The light grows strong and the tunnel of darkness seems to fade out of my vision. All I see is this comforting light. Something inside me knows that I have to take it. I have to pick this tunnel to go down. This is my way out. I'm so close to it. I take on more step, nearly face to face with it. Then, I hear her voice.
I can't make out what it's saying, but I hear a voice. A girl's voice. My hopes are now high and I immediately think it's Karai. I just know it, it has to be. So with a big ear to ear grin, I rush in. Without second thought, I run into the tunnel of light.
Karai! My thoughts call out to her, but she's not here. I look around for a moment, just a moment. It all happens so fast. But within a flash, I see her. Another girl I don't recognize. She's tall, long brown hair. Her cheeks are kissed with freckles and blue glasses compliment her shining eyes. Her skin is pale, but her smile is soft. She wears a salmon pink shirt that flows like a waterfall, making her cheeks even more rosy than they already seem to be. I don't know why, but I just know that she was the one calling out to me. I reach out to touch her. And just like that, she's gone. The light is taken from my vision and I'm left in cold sweats. Dreadfully greeted by darkness again. But somethings different. I feel different. This time I feel pain. This darkness seems even more scary and mysterious than the last. I know I'm not in my mind anymore. I can't be. I shakily lift up my hand and hold it in front of my face. My heart sinks. I see nothing. I know what's different this time. I know what's wrong. I'm no longer trapped in my mind. This time, I'm awake.
