Chapter 4 - Fists
Carl's eye darkened and his head tilted at his father's words. 'What do you mean, she's gone? Is she patrolling?'
'She's just, gone.' The words felt like acid on Rick's tongue as he almost spit the words out.
'Why?' Carl demanded, walking forward and gripping his shoulders.
It was the first touch Rick had allowed since losing Glenn. Carl's fingers tightened and he shook Rick. It was a small shake designed to bring one's focus back to the topic at hand.
But Rick wasn't focused. Rick's head was spinning out of control. Rick's world was spinning out of control. This day started in this bed with Michonne. And now, he had lost one of his dearest friends, he had lost control of the communities future, and he had pushed away the one person who meant everything to him because he couldn't give her a future.
'Get some sleep. We'll talk about it in the morning.' Rick dismissed him, standing to get out of the boy's grip. Why was he suddenly so weary of being touched?
'What's wrong with you?!' Carl said, his voice growing angry and loud. 'Go get her back. Whatever you did, fix it and bring her back!'
His words weren't registering any more than Rick's own words had registered in his own mind. The world kept spinning wildly. Rick felt like he'd been on the teacup ride he hated so much, only a darker and clouded by despair.
Then, out of nowhere, he felt Carl's fist connect with the side of his jaw. It was a bone crushing blow. Rick's mouth filled with blood as he looked on at Carl's face, furious and looking as though he wanted to hit his dad again.
That was when a light in his mind flickered on. He heard Carl yelling at him again, and then again felt Carl's fist on the other side of his face. The words were indistinguishable, but the pain was sharp. Sharp enough to cause the flicker to turn to a steady glow, which brought with it an awareness.
Carl seemed to recognize the change because he stepped away from his father. They were both breathing hard, but Rick seemed like a man who was taking his first breath in days.
'You're okay now?' Carl asked, his fists still clinched at his sides.
'Yeah, I'm okay now,' Rick answered. 'I'm sorry, I got sucked down for a while. I'm okay.'
'Why did Michonne leave?' Carl stated his question from earlier. 'Where is she going? She should be home.' Carl was now hurling accusingly at Rick.
'I pushed her away,' Rick said, getting up he ran out to find her.
