Chapter 8
I sat there with a scowl clear on my face. It wasn't the place I had seen myself at when we had left from the school. It was pouring rain and storming. We were in a little cave in the middle of a forest of the middle of nowhere. I couldn't believe how things went from good to worse so quickly. The day had started out so well too…
Earlier that day…
Sana gave me a shove in the shoulder as she watched me pack up my clothes for the weekend; her eyes following my every move as I walked around.
"You know, you could help instead of just sitting there watching," I laughed, throwing some pants into a bag.
"If I started helping then you know I would mess everything up," she said as she stifled a laugh, "I might actually make it look neat."
Everything was just being stuffed into a bad without much care. I just wanted to get it done.
"So what do you think is gunna happen?" Sana wondered curiously, "Do you think he's gunna… try stuff?"
"What do you mean?"
"You two are going camping together, alone, and you don't know what I'm suggesting?" she asked doubtfully.
I laughed with Sana's words. It sounded like she wanted to know how far Sesshoumaru and I had been.
"Wow Sana, I didn't know you were perverted," I mused, shaking my head with a smirk, "He said he would wait until I was ready. He doesn't want to rush me into something I might not be comfortable with."
"For an older guy… he's pretty old fashioned," she laughed, "It's good to hear he's taking care of you though."
"He makes me feel safe," I told her with a small smile, "Like he'd be there no matter what happened."
"That's good to know. If he didn't, I'd have to kill him," Sana exclaimed, a large grin on her face.
"I would hand you the knife," I agreed with a nod as I zipped up my bag, "What about you and Shin? Did you make your move yet?"
Sana's face turned red as she turned her head to the side. Her actions made me smile.
"I kiss him the other day," she admitted, her face turning a deeper shade of red, "He kissed me back, and asked me to go out with him."
"Aw, that's so awesome Sana," I stated with a large smile, "I'm really happy for you."
'Take that Sesshoumaru. I told you Shin didn't like me.' I thought triumphantly.
"We're going to see a movie this weekend."
"Do yourself a favor Sana, don't take him to see a scary movie," I mused, "You know he'll just get sick after."
"But then I can't make him feel better," she pretended to whine, pouting a little.
With a laugh, I shook my head and pushed her to the side. Neither of us had really cared much about the opposite sex. It hadn't been until a few months ago Sana told me she had liked Shin. There really had been no need for it. While everyone else lived through loads of drama and fighting, Sana and I sat back and watched. Drama had never really been a part of our high school lives.
She patted my back with a pleasant smile before grabbing my bag for me.
"Hey, what are you doing?" I asked with some confusion.
"You said you wanted help," she beamed, "I'm helping you carry your things to school."
"You just want to get rid of me!" I fake cried from my bed.
"Yeah, I want you gone so I can have your bed all to myself," Sana teased, walking out of my room.
"If you drool on my pillow, I'll be so mad!"
"Like you'll ever know," she continued, "I'll buy a Saint Bernard and bring him here and he'll get slobber all over the place. There will even be drool on your television screen."
"As if you could afford that dog," I mocked; a small smirk on my face, "You can't even afford to buy yourself some fish."
"Yeah, like you're any better!"
Iichi looked up at me with large, sad, brown puppy dog eyes. Since Sana was babysitting, we had to bring him along to the school.
'Why is this kid so cute?' I asked myself with a sympathetic expression.
"Please don't go Ku!" he begged me, pulling on my hand, "Sana's always mean in Double Dash when you're not there."
I made a nervous laugh with his words. In truth, Sana was actually pretty nice to him when she played. It was the times that I was on his team that she would go all out and throw items in every which direction. Iichi never noticed because he was too busy trying to get his own items out. In all honesty… it was painful.
"Oh I'm sure she's not that bad," I assured him, patting his head, "We'll just have to beat her when I come back."
"Don't get eaten by a bear," Sana laughed, "Let it eat Mr. Taisho while you make a break for it."
"Well aren't you kind, Hanaki," his voice stated emotionlessly from behind us.
Sana's eyes matched his coldness as she caught his gaze.
"Well you can't blame me for wanting her to live more," she stated, smirking darkly, "I mean, she's not the one I have to worry about doing something that might screw things up."
I watcher her glare him down for a few silent intent moments before a grin was back on her face.
"Now that that's out of the way," she mused, patting my shoulder, "Have fun while you're out in the wilderness."
"Yeah," I grinned, "Have fun at the movies. Iichi, be a good boy okay?"
"Yes ma'am!" he laughed, giving me a hug, "You be good too."
"Oh absolutely."
The two of them waved as they walked toward the street lights.
Sesshoumaru kept watching as I looked up at him.
"She doesn't like me much," he stated, not moving, "Does she?"
"She's just protective," I laughed.
It had been funny to think that she hadn't liked me when we had first met. She didn't approve of my behavior and how I treated people. Then a time came when I had gained a sense of humility and let Sana in. It had been a choice I had never regretted.
"It's good to see that I'm not the only one," he mused, patting my head before leading me to his car.
"It's not like I need it," I muttered, carrying my bag, "I'd like to keep some of my pride, you know."
Sesshoumaru took my things and put them in his trunk.
"Did your aunt give you any trouble?" he questioned, getting in himself.
"Not really," I explained with a shrug, "Both her and my uncle were going away to somewhere this weekend. She didn't really have much to say besides 'ask Sana to baby sit'."
"It seems as though they are away a lot," he stated as he drove.
I shrugged again, "They work hard; between taking care of us and their jobs. They do what they can when they can. Now that I have my head on straight, it makes it easier for them."
I must have made things difficult for them.
"So they live to their fullest."
"Yeah," I agreed with a small laugh, "I guess you could call it that."
Present…
I groaned with the miserable weather. By the time we had made it to the camp, the owners had lost our spot. Then when we had decided to walk the trail, the clouds had decided to roll in. It had been then that Sesshoumaru had decided to wander off the trail.
"Are you sure you're smart enough to be a teacher?" I asked him with a raised brow, "I mean, even I'm not dumb enough to wander off a trail in the middle of nowhere."
"Then why did you follow me?" he questioned, wringing out his hair.
We had the luck of getting caught in the middle of a storm. Everything we had was soaked all the way through.
I openly scowled at his remark, glaring at the rain.
"I was chasing after you," I hissed, trying to warm myself up from the rain, "because I knew something like this would happen."
"Then you should have tried harder to bring me back," he stated, starting to sound amused.
"I tried, but you just kept walking like I weighed nothing at all!" I growled; becoming frustrated.
The whole situation had been his fault.
"Then you should have tried harder," he continued simply.
My fists clenched tightly as he tried to pawn the situation onto me.
"What would you have had me do?" I asked, turning back to glare icily at him.
Suddenly I was pinned down; his face inches away from mine.
"Seduce me."
My eyes widened as my heart skipped a beat and started to pound in my chest. His orbs were locked with mine and I could tell that he was serious. It was because of that that I couldn't look away.
"What are you-"
His lips cut me off; catching me in a deep kiss. Everything heated up then. My cheeks felt warm and my upper torso suddenly felt warm.
I could feel his hand slowly moving up my side; raising my shirt higher. A small gasp escaped me when his lips traced down my throat. The feeling was overwhelming; his hand and lips sending shivers through me. I didn't know how to respond.
"Are you okay with this?" he questioned quietly; his voice sounding a little strained.
"I'm not about to think about it," I murmured, just feeling his warmth.
He lifted his head and looked down at me then. I could see it in his eyes; the happiness that he his from other people. I knew that this meant as much to him as it did to me.
"Kuae…"
Reaching up with my freehand, I pulled myself up to him and kissed him gently on the lips.
His arms wrapped around me tightly as the kiss deepened. I lost my self then. Logic disappeared and instinct took over. I wanted him, more than I had ever cared to admit about a person. As our lips parted, I couldn't stop myself.
"I love you," I whispered, wrapping my arms around him.
His hold loosened as he looked down at me. I closed my eyes, not knowing if I wanted to see his expression.
His heart caught in his throat at her words. He had never heard someone say those words with such honesty. It had all been a false lie before…
"Kuae, look at me," he told her, trying to sound stern.
He wanted her. He couldn't hold it back anymore. If there was ever a chance for anything, now was the time.
"Kuae," he asked again, not moving his gaze.
It took a few moments before she met his eyes. Her face was flushed… there had been no need for embarrassment.
"I love you too," he stated, moving his face closer to hers, "More than anything."
If he had to run across the world to see her, he knew he would make the journey. If there was anything he could do it for her, he would do it.
My heart pounded as his lips pressed against mine. His hands pulled my shirt upward, removing it from me. I could feel my blush deepen as his golden orbs stared into mine. His lips traced down to the base of my neck; leaving a trail of burning kisses in their path. I couldn't mask a small moan when his fingers touched the lower edge of my bra. They were warm… heating up my body from the cold temperature.
When his hand took hold of a breast and began gently fondling it, I couldn't stop a shudder through me. My body responded to his actions; arching my hips to touch against his. Logic seemed so pointless to try to hold onto. I didn't want to think, I only wanted him…
I reached up to him, my own hands touching the skin underneath his clothes. I felt him tense and pause at my touch. Using the moment, I pulled his shirt from him. There had been no reason why I was the only one half naked.
"You're sure?" he asked me with a quiet tone, "I want you to be mine… and I won't be able to stop if you continue…"
My fingers lightly traced down his torso to the button of his pants. Undoing it, I started to kiss and nip at his neck. It was as if touching him made him real and it was proof I wasn't dreaming.
"I'm sure," I murmured against his neck.
At first I didn't know if I should panic when his hands when to undo my pants. My heart was pounding heavily in my ears, making it hard to focus on anything. The only thing I was sure of was that he was there and this was real. The rain and forest no longer existed. It was just him. It had been when his lips captured mine that I felt a sense of pain between my legs. I cried out against it, almost trying to struggle away.
"I know Kuae," he murmured, holding my hands, "I'll be gentle… the pain will pass."
I tried to relax; to loosen my muscles. It was hard to ignore the pain.
A few moments passed before he started to slowly move. It was steady, slowly forcing away the pain.
"Sesshoumaru." I quietly gasped, trying to pull a hand free.
He released my hand and I reached up to pull him close to me.
"I love you," I told him as I started to feel more pleasure.
"I love you too Kuae," he nearly moaned, wrapping his arms around me.
I pulled him close before taking his lips with mine. His grip tightened as he pushed within my wet walls. The kiss deepened and his motion became quicker. He moaned in his throat when he thrusted forward and I could feel his erection convulsing.
As our lips parted, he rested his forehead against mine. Sweat covered both our bodies as out eyes met with one another. Through the desire, I could see that he was happy… I knew he had done something right. All the walls between us had been broken and we were connected.
He placed a kiss on my lips before withdrawing from me and laying down beside me. Wrapping an arm around my waist, he pulled me against him.
'I can't believe that just happened… I just had sex with Sesshoumaru…' My face became flushed at the thought.
"I'm glad that it rained," I stated with a tired smile.
"I thought you were angry because of it," Sesshoumaru mused, resting his head against mine.
"I was."
"Then it is a good thing I took a detour."
I smiled with his words. If it hadn't been for the rain, then I wouldn't have been connected to him like I was now.
By the time the rain had stopped, it was nearly night time. Both of us crawled into the tent and went under the covers of the bed. Thoughts of what had happened plagued my mind. It had never been something I had seen myself doing. I had always seen it as something normal girls did at a young age. Somehow it hadn't felt wrong in that sense.
'Probably because I did it out of love and not out of a sense of lust…'
"What are your plans for summer vacation?" Sesshoumaru's voice broke through my thoughts.
"Probably just get ready for the next school year. My aunt and uncle are usually busy during the summer," I explained, feeling the warmth of his chest against my back, "Iichi plays all kinds of sports so they go watch him play."
He pulled me closer to him and rested his head on mine.
"I was wondering if you would be interested in going somewhere with me."
"Where would this somewhere be?" I wondered with a raised brow.
"If I tell you, it's not a surprise," he said tiredly.
"Then why tell me about it now?"
"It was just a thought."
I let out a small laugh before I rolled over to face him.
"I'd like to go," I told him, placing a kiss on his nose.
It felt like things had finally settled down and everything was going right. There had never been a time where I had felt comfortable with another person. It felt like our emotions were mixed together; like we were somehow bonded.
"Good night Kuae."
When I opened my eyes the next morning, I had to admit that I had been a little confused. Waking up with someone's arm wrapped tightly around me wasn't something that I had been used to. The feeling made me smile all the same. It was comforting and warm. I didn't want it to stop.
"I never thought of you as an early riser," Sesshoumaru mused into my ear.
His words made me laugh, "I don't usually. I guess today is a special occasion."
"This is one of my favorite special occasions then," he laughed for a moment.
Hearing him laugh was a rare thing. It wasn't very often that someone could bring out his sense of humor.
"Then I wish I could freeze time," I stated, trying to get closer to him, "Then I wouldn't have to end this moment."
"It doesn't have to end," he said simply, his voice gentle and calm, "We could stay this way with each morning."
"Yeah," I laughed halfheartedly, "If we were closer to the same age then it wouldn't really be a problem."
No matter how badly we wanted to spend every day together as close as we were now, no one would allow it. No one would leave us be if we were to let people know the truth.
Sesshoumaru's lips pressed against my neck and his arm tightened around my waist.
"It does not matter to me what people would think. If you're comfortable with the choices you have made, then that's all that should matter," he explained.
"It wouldn't matter what people would try to do?" I asked him with a raised brow, "Wouldn't it bother you that they would try to get between us?"
"I would not allow such a thing to happen."
His words brought a smile to my face. I didn't know how he had managed to make a place for himself in my life. After he had made such hell out of my school life, I couldn't believe he had turned it around.
'I'm glad that he did though. Even if we get caught… it would all be worth it.'
After all that had happened, I didn't want this to change. For the first time in a long time, I was happy again. It felt like nothing had ever happened and I was whole again.
He glanced over at her as he pulled into the school parking lot. Their time together had been shorter than he had wanted. She had spent most of the ride home staring out the car window. He knew that she was thinking about what had happened and everything they had talked about.
It was the first time he had felt like he could say anything he wished and be honest with a person. She listened to what he said and understood it. She saw him for who he was instead of everything he had. That in it self made him happy with his decision. He cherished her more than anything else.
"You're sure you don't wish for a ride home?" he questioned with a raised brow.
"It would be better for me to catch the train," she explained with a small smile, "If my aunt's home then she'll have questions if I got a ride from my 'uncle'."
"Yes I suppose this is true."
Both of them got out of the car and went to the trunk. Opening it, he handed her the bag she had brought. As she went to grab it, he pulled her close to him, capturing her lips with his. He kissed her deeply, and when he pulled away he could see her flushed face.
"I love you Kuae," he said lowly before kissing her forehead gently.
"I love you too," she replied quietly in her embarrassment, "Sesshoumaru."
He smiled at hearing his name. Hearing her say it was somehow pleasing.
"I'll see you at school tomorrow," he told her as he gave her a hug, "Try not to cause trouble."
"Yeah I'll just go wreak havoc on the villagers."
"Bye Ku."
"See you tomorrow," she laughed as she waved goodbye.
Once I made it back home, I was confused by the car sitting in the driveway; it wasn't a familiar one. My aunt and uncle hadn't come home from they're trip yet, which made me wonder if Sana was still there.
"Hello?" I called as I walked in through the door.
"Ku's home!" Iichi called happily before he came running around the corner.
"Hey Iichi, were you good for Sana?"
"Of course. We kicked butt at Double Dash!" he chimed, a wide grin on his face.
"That's awesome, good job," I laughed.
I looked up to see Sana standing against the wall with a concerned expression on her face. My brows furrowed with some confusion.
"What's the matter?"
"Your dad's here," she said quietly, "He said he came to see how you were doing."
My eyes widened as I dropped my bag to the floor. It felt like my heart had skipped a beat. Of all the times and of all the people… why did it have to be my father?
"Do you want me to take Iichi out so he won't be here?" she wondered, her tone more worried than anything, "I know how you feel about him…"
"Yeah… that would probably be a good idea."
"Come on Iichi, let's go get ice cream," Sana said with a fake smile, "You can make your own sundae."
"Okay!"
I watched as the two of them left before I proceeded into the house. My father was the last person I ever wanted to see. I would have rather been attacked by Shiro's gang again than see that man. I would never forgive him for what he had done.
My brows pushed together as I saw him sitting at the kitchen table. I stool in the hallway; not daring to get any closer.
"What are you doing here?" I asked icily, watching him intently.
He looked like his age had finally caught up to him. His hair had started to turn grey and I could see wrinkles even from where I was.
"Your aunt called and told me you were doing a lot better," he explained emotionlessly, "I thought I would come see for myself."
"Well I'm doing fine, so you can leave now," I hissed, my hands clenching.
He never gave a rat's ass about how I was doing before. There was no reason for him to suddenly start caring now.
My father didn't move from his chair; he merely brought his hands together.
"You're still mad I see."
"What did you expect from me?" I asked him with frustration, "Did you honestly expect me to just be happy to see you all of a sudden?"
"Not really," he admitted, shaking his head, "I just wanted proof that this was a better place for you than with me. I didn't want to see you throw your life away."
"Yeah," I scoffed, "I was alone when I was with you. You were never home and when you were, you were too concerned about what you had to do. It was always about you."
'He probably wouldn't have cared if I was dead too.'
"Anywhere would have been better than with you."
I could feel them, the tears running down my face. He was my father, and he probably care more about the lint in his pockets than he did about me.
"Kuae-"
"I don't care what you have to say to defend yourself," I cut him off, "I just want you to leave."
I walked away and went into my bedroom. Shutting the door, I sat against it and started crying.
My life had become a lonely hell hole after my mother had died. I had no one to turn to and nobody was there to care. I rebelled against my father because he didn't care and I was lonely. If I acted that way then maybe he would have at least tried to fix it. I was wrong. He just passed me to the next person in line to deal with it. They cared more about me than he did, and it would always be that way.
I heard the front door shut and a car start. After a few moments, my father was gone.
"I hope you never come back," I murmured hatefully, resting my head against my knees.
As I thought about what happened, it was hard to believe that such a good weekend could end so poorly. Who knew things could turn so sour so fast.
End of Chapter
