Author's Note: it's only this and an epilogue now. Thank you for reading and reviewing! This is my longest doc this far, but I am working on two more- The Perfect Drug and Somewhere Only We Know.
Chapter 18: The Nearness of You
September first came quickly and Hermione and the kids had enjoyed a fantastic end to the summer, Ron,Severus and Joanna joined them for their ritual before school started of shopping in Diagon Alley and then eating at their favorite Italian restaurant. This time, Hermione noticed how easily Joanna and Severus fit into their odd family; both brought something that the kids could use; Joanna brought effortless kindness and Severus brought unending devotion. Ron even seemed happier too, as though he'd needed someone like Joanna just as much as Hermione needed someone like Severus. It was a lovely day.
Weeks later, Hermione ended up at St. Mungos to visit Seamus who had broken his foot on a mission. He was in jovial spirits as usual and let Snape work his magic, though he really didn't do as much healing as he brewed potions. It made her happy to watch Snape work.
"I'll see you later, Severus. Stay out of trouble, Seamus." Hermione said, leaving St. Mungos and heading home. The sitting area was a mess and the children's room were pure havoc, so she cleaned everything before Severus stopped by after work. Harlow had still not returned and it troubled Hermione greatly, she'd been such a loyal companion since her first anniversary with Ron. Without trying to, Hermione found herself falling asleep on the settee in the sitting room between the two halves of the house, dreaming peacefully. It wasn't until Snape arrived that she finally woke, her mind thinking it was already morning.
"I have a surprise for you." Hermione rubbed her eyes and saw the tiniest owl in the largest cage she'd ever seen. It was a screech owl, she could tell by the markings.
"Oh Severus, it's lovely."
"He's a boy. I could sense that you were still troubled about Harlow" He added, dropping a few treats into the cage.
"Well he needs to grow a bit, but he's lovely, thank you!" She kissed him sharply and looked closer at her new present.
"We should call him Thaddeus, he looks just like one."She remarked, staring into his sweet, large eyes. He hooted sweetly when she called his new name.
"I thought we could stay at Spinner's End, that way, Thaddeus can see both locations." She nodded and grabbed her bag, and waited as Severus and the new owl used the floo network and she apparated.
"Was he frightened?" Hermione asked as they arrived in Severus' living room, she helped dust he and Thaddeus off before using her wand to turn on the lights.
"No more than was expected." He joked, allowing the tiny owl to fly around the home before giving him a small mouse and letting him out the window.
"You are always so thoughtful. I've never given you anything, really. I still can't find your birthday present, and that's almost been a year."
"You have given me plenty." They kissed quickly and went to the study to catch up on their day over coffee and perhaps to read. She finally met the elusive black cat she'd never seen once except in his vision. Her name was Luna, he quickly said not after Luna Lovegood Scamander.
"I so enjoy being here with you." Hermione said, out of nowhere. She was petting Luna and sipping her tea before they ate dinner. It suddenly hit her that she was tired of saying goodbye to Severus most nights and she didn't want to anymore.
"How would you feel about living together?" She asked, gauging his interest based on the level of his brow, which seemed pretty high at the moment.
"At this house or yours?" He countered.
"Why not both, with the children gone I need not go to Lavender house as often as I normally would, but we'd certainly have more privacy here. We could alternate weeks or something, work out a plan so that Ron and Joanna have time to themselves. At least until Hugo graduates, then we can discuss what we'll do then. "
"That sounds reasonable." He finally replied, tossing a small book her way, some journal of an old wizard.
"I just don't want to say goodbye to you so often." She finally said, setting her tea and Luna aside, crawling onto his lap and leaning her head against his shoulder. There was something so comforting about listening to his heart beat or the steady motion of his breathing.
"I was thinking about this thing with the guru...you said he connected our souls forever, what does that mean besides the literal?" She asked randomly, finding thinking back to August when everything had seemed so chaotic and emotional. Kissing his chin, she played with his necktie and then waited for his reply.
"I don't know exactly, accept that if you are ever in danger, I will be able to find you and vice versa. It's like bonding, I assume." She still wasn't entirely clear on the concept.
"So, like marriage?" Trepidation in her tone, she sat up slightly to be able to face him a bit more.
"Not exactly, but far more like marriage than, say, being related to someone. It's a special kind of magic practiced in the East. We can do more research, if you'd like." Hermione nodded, letting the wheels turn every so quickly in her brain.
"It's just, what if you decide, and I know we've been through this, I'm not questioning your loyalty, but what if you decide not to spend your life with me? Our souls will still be connected?" He shifted his weight, thumbing his brow and alternately looking at Hermione and then his books.
"According to our guru, we aren't going to spend our lives with anyone else, or he wouldn't have performed the magic. Maybe he's a seer? All I know is, since that day, I've never felt more sure about anything or more willing to do whatever it takes to make it work. Even if your hair gets caught in my mouth at night and your incessant need to be right clouds your judgement."
"Aren't you cheeky." She playfully slapped his chest and put a finger to his lips. "I love to learn and when something I don't understand arises, I ask questions. That's not going to change, you know, we can go back to India and have the guru undo his Eastern magic if you're so worried about being wrong." He smacked her butt softly and lifted her over his shoulder.
"Perhaps you do need a lesson, witch." She playfully shouted the entire way to the bedroom and continued for entirely different reasons soon after.
Ron seemed to like the new schedule and told Hermione that Joanna would be moving in as well, though Hermione didn't want to think it was only because Severus would be spending alternate weeks at their home. Lavender House was abustle with noise again, though some evenings it was completely silent. Joanna had completely given up her flat, so she was with Ron whenever she wasn't in the field, for Hermione it was nice having another woman in the house to share things with or to talk about her old job.
Rose and Hugo sent letters at least once a month, mostly Hugo's were about something new he learned and Rose's were about looking forward to coming home for Christmas. She wrote them both quick replies and waited for Bertie to have some water and food before sending him off, not quite ready to send Thaddeus on such an adventure just yet. There lives had evolved into something quite domestic since neither she nor Severus were in the field. They both worked a regular shift in the day, mostly Monday through Friday unless there was a major occurrence and Snape was needed for extra brewing, then they retired into the evenings after eating to read or walk, sometimes they ate in the village if they were at Spinner's End, or with Ron and Joanna if they happened to be around as well. Hermione had done some research on the magic of the guru, but hadn't found much about the actual spell he must've used to connect their souls. It reminded her of a horcrux, just not in an evil way, but she didn't know exactly where else to look.
As the weather turned colder, Hermione enjoyed sitting with Severus on the sofa in the sitting room at Lavender House and sipping hot tea together, listening to music or watching some muggle movies, which he'd come to tolerate through his own experience as a child. It didn't take much to make Hermione happy now that she felt so free with him, their worlds so completely connected.
The children came home towards the end of December greeted by their patient, but cold parents at King's Cross. The car was full of stories as they rode back to Lavender House, quidditch and potions, cats, and mandrake root. It all felt familiar and happy. They geared up for Christmas Eve at the Weasleys, with all their Aunts, Uncles, and cousins, everyone in a Weasley sweater, even one for Severus Molly had knitted just in time for the celebration.
"It's itchy." He groused in the foyer of Lavender House as they prepared to apparate. Ron took Hugo and Hermione was taking Rose, the other two adults following. After arriving at The Burrow, which couldn't hold all of the family comfortably, Severus immediately felt out of place. He looked nothing like the bunch in dulcet tones of red and brown, their freckles multiplying by the minute. Once Hermione arrived and sent the kids to the heated tent to play, Severus felt more comfortable. It suddenly felt different to him, to see all of the young people and then to see Molly and Arthur, who were older than him by a few years.
"Happy Christmas, Uncle Severus." Albus said, giving him a cracker and pulling the other end, producing several fine toys and a magnificent crown which Severus felt compelled to wear.
"You too, now see if James likes the magical mouse." Severus teased, enticing Albus to take the mouse to his older brother.
"You aren't stirring the pot, are you?" Hermione asked, bringing him a glass of pumpkin juice, spiked with Arthur's own variety of gin they obviously hadn't known about as kids. Looking around the room, Hermione was incredibly thankful that the Weasley's still accepted her as family, even though she and Ron had divorced. It was the large family she always wanted with little of the stress she used to feel about pleasing them.
"A namesake must be encouraged." He replied, putting his arm around her shoulders and kissing her head. He hadn't known family like this either. From the tent, they both heard Molly call for dinner and followed the crowd outside, the tent cozy and welcoming.
"We are thankful for each of you, being here and celebrating with us. Happy Christmas, now dig in."Arthur said, toasting the massive crowd. The Weasley's could easily have their own quidditch dynasty and then some. Hermione's buttered, pecan yams really hit the spot, Fleur's peach tarts were completely scrumptious, but Molly's hearty beef burgundy made everyone's mouth water. They were all thankful she'd allowed them to contribute a dish as she normally spent two days cooking.
On the return home, they all followed suit taking a child or an adult to Lavender House, everyone trudging up to their bedrooms, Hugo and Rose hugging their parents and Severus and Joanna, which was new for Severus. Once they were out, the four adults put out the tree they'd hid in the backyard and all the presents, special stockings for everyone, and even treats for the owls and Luna when they returned to Spinner's End. Once in their room, Hermione stripped away her Weasley sweater and stockings, feeling just as tired as the kids had. She remembered suddenly where she'd put Snape's birthday present, it was in the fourth shelf of her letter box, transfigured to be invisible. Digging through her letterbox, Hermione finally found it and brought it back to normal size, as Severus showered and changed for bed, his flannel pajamas a plaid of green and black, always a Slytherin.
"I've finally found your birthday present, though it's almost your birthday again. It has two parts, one is sentimental and the other a bit practical." She waited as he opened it, her own anticipation building. The first gift was the blanket from their boat ride on Loch Ness, sentimental and probably a bit school-girlish and the second was really two things, a hand drawn map of MIddle Earth and a set of books in Tolkien's own hand. She remembered once Severus telling her, Seamus, and Todd about his mother reading The Hobbit to him as a kid, the only nice thing she'd done. He didn't say anything at first, only held the books in his hands, looking over them as if they were golden.
"I hope it's been worth the wait." He heard her voice but he was still in awe. He placed the books and blanket back in the cloth back, unable to fathom that she'd given him something he'd wanted for so long.
"How did you know? This was long before we were so connected." His voice trembled, as she cautiously walked over to him, straddling his waist and holding him.
"I already loved you, then, and I knew that if I could give you something like this, it would heal old wounds and create new feelings. Do you like them? And the blanket, you know that's from Loch Ness?" She pulled back slightly, catching his face in her hands.
"You were right, Severus, I did notice, even if I wasn't ready to act on it."
"I have something for you as well." He said, repositioning a bit to open the top flap of his flannel pajamas and producing a ring. "I didn't know if you'd want one, since before your hands were so, well broken, but now I thought it was appropriate. I want to marry you, Hermione, to be sealed not only in Eastern but Western magic. What do you say?" She was dumbfounded and completely shocked, causing her to fall backwards, hitting her head squarely on the edge of her desk, knocking herself out for a moment.
"Hermione, if you wanted to say no you didn't have to go through dramatics." She heard Severus whisper, as he brought her out of her minor head trauma. It took a moment to register what had just happened, had Severus just proposed?
"Of course I want to marry you, Severus." She smiled as he slid the ring on her finger, it was a gorgeous setting of emeralds and a diamond in the middle, something he would definitely pick out.
"I've been carrying that ring around far too long." They held each other as Hermione admired her new ring, snuggled against him as closely as she could.
"Really now?"
"If I could've asked you the day you got out of the hospital, I would've." He replied, kissing her fingers and holding her hand against his chest.
"I would've said yes." He gently carried her to the bath, making sure her brain was completely functioning and helped her into the bath.
"I know you've already showered but you could join me, you know." So Severus removed his clothes and joined his fiancée in the bath, holding her close and washing her hair, enjoying their time before the hectic morning of frenzied unwrapping and scattered breakfast. When they finally made it to bed, Hermione cocooned herself against him, as she normally did, admiring her ring again before closing her yes and pulling his arm across her.
The next morning, just as Snape had predicted there was a frenzy of unwrapping. New scales and a copper pot for Hugo, a new broom for Rose and plenty of gifts from the Grangers. Sheepishly, Hugo brought a present to Snape, oddly wrapped with the word 'Bop' on it.
"Bop?" He questioned, in a playful tone.
"Bonus parent." Hugo replied, as Severus opened his gift, completely satisfied with the nickname Hugo had given him. "I hope you don't mind, I don't like calling you Professor Snape anymore since you love my Mum so much." Snape was surprised to find a collection of recipes modified for restorative potions, something he'd obviously put a lot of research into.
"This is brilliant, Hugo." He exclaimed, giving Hugo a rather tight hug. "And Bop is good, I like Bop." Hugo scampered away, taking gifts to Ron and Joanna, things he'd made while in school that were personal.
"Bop, huh?" Hermione joked, pinching him slightly, catching Rose's eye. Rose noticed the ring but didn't say anything.
"It could be worse."He replied, thinking of all the horrid things students had called him throughout the years. He had never had Christmas quite like this, even when he was at Hogwarts, it was always a nice breakfast and dinner feast, crackers with Albus Dumbledore, but not so much togetherness and certainly not hugs from young people who admired felt like a pretty complete Christmas morning.
It was hours later when Rose finally confronted Hermione about the ring.
"I didn't want to say anything in front of Dad, you know in case you hadn't told him, but that looks like an engagement ring." Hermione smiled at her daughter, appreciating her fortuity and took her aside.
"It is, honey, he asked me last night. I am going to tell Dad later, so thank you for not bringing it up." Rose gave Hermione a tight hug then ran back to the sitting room where Hugo playing exploding snaps with Ron, who was opening Rose's broon servicing kit. It all seemed rather cozy, so Hermione let herself watch them and enjoy, even Severus was talking to Rose about proper broom care.
They ate a late brunch of french toast with raspberries and fresh clotted cream before all scattering about the house, enjoying a quiet day with their gifts and each other. It wasn't until closer to bedtime when Hermione finally found a quiet time with Ron on the portico. Joanna had left to visit her family for dinner, so she was surprised to find Ron on portico by himself.
"Why didn't you go with Joanna?" Hermione asked, pulling her Weasley sweater over her head, the air chilly.
"I think these couple days have been overwhelming for her, a bit heavy. You remember what it was like, there are a lot of us." Hermione nodded, knowing exactly how overwhelming that feeling felt, so many nice and well-meaning people, but for an only child it was a heavy feeling. Of course, over time she came to long for all those people, but be so included in such a happy and large family.
"Congratulations, by the way." He added, his hands warming on the small fire he'd made in the fire pit.
"Thank you, I was coming out here to tell you, actually." She didn't quite know how to act about it, being too mushy about Severus would be unfair to Ron, but acting indifferent just wasn't her.
"I meant what I said before, if he hurts you, I'll kill him."
"Thank you, but you know I'd kill him first." He agreed, his handed pushed together in an awkward mashing, over and over. It bothered her to see him so frustrated.
"I'm sorry about Joanna, she'll come around, I did. She'll come to love them as much as I do and she'll be able to give you so much more than I did."
"Maybe, right now I don't know. It seems madness to be starting over again, thinking about what she might miss out on since our kids are older. I mean, in a year and a half Rose will graduate from Hogwarts, having another kid seems selfish." And that was the crux, Ron was worried about starting over, having another like with Joanna and how that would all mix with his 'first' family.
"But you've always wanted more children; I can't remember a time when you weren't begging me to have more. Joanna will be an excellent mother and you are a great father." He laughed at the oddity of their conversation, his ex-wife comforting him about his current girlfriend.
"Well, we have a year or so before I even want to consider it, Joanna will be finished with her current contract then. I guess we'll see." Hermione was glad he seemed at least hopeful about it, but she still worried Ron would let old arguments and prejudices keep him from being happy with Joanna or any woman for that matter.
"If we could've made it work, I would've done anything, but we couldn't. I really like Joanna and if she is the one you end up with, I will happily welcome her to our family, as you have welcomed Severus." She added, hoping to ease his mind further. Ron didn't say anything, just looked to the stars and sighed deeply. They both looked up as Severus walked onto the portico, bringing them both a cup of mulled mead.
"You looked like you needed something warm." He said handing them each a mug and taking a seat next to Hermione, her arm tenderly resting on his leg.
"So Bop, huh?" Ron said, taking a swig of the mead.
"Hugo's own design." Severus replied, the steam from his mead making his nose tickle.
"Happy Christmas!" Hermione suddenly exclaimed, pulling both their heads under her arms, almost spilling their mead. They had a good laugh before going back inside and letting the fire die. It was the first time in ages Hermione had absolutely no worries or concerns, and the feeling was freeing.
