A/N: Before the story starts...
SPECIAL THANKS TO: Kriegsmaschine, MisfitMisaki, Ruby Warrior Girl 730, Strawberry Cake with Yaoi, darkwaterwolf, kittinolegs, Alexa Moon, Emmarose13, Naruta13, Neliayui, Sasulchi4ever, ShafiraHatake, ShaokiUzumi, StrifesLove, TeukieWookie, TheBlackenedAbyss, Yumi-Ulrich4Ever, ZSAngel, animeluvv679, beeabeeon49, kingdom of tsunderes, mikepd, pyrobookwyrm, TangleTalon393, LucifernSatan, xacexz, EveeRoseRunner, Au-the-Spirit, KoolKid9875, PerpetualXLight, Justice333, Digimatic, Maxlnu23, DemyxFangirl (I am one too, I actually want his hair: anyway,), DreamsComeFromTheHeart, guest on chapter13, AnimeFreak4261, nidoarisato, Soko-chan, Skylar Light, Sable-Reiver, DieChan, Amy, youknowily, sometimes i don't get myself, CrazyHighLunatic, and kilala2tail.
Thank you so much for your support with reviews and following/favoriting. I cannot properly express how honored I am to have all of you reading Miracles. It is truly a dream come true!
Okay, enough fluff, now onto the story... (Love to all of you!)
Chapter 14: Miracles
Riku knew he had won out of sheer luck. The look on Sora's face was simply a work of art; as if coming off a rollercoaster, his expression was free of his shield and chains. Flushed, shocked; the silveret watched, in that minute moment, the clouds in his blue eyes fade away. His eyes were crystals that no camera could ever hope to capture.
Then that moment ended, and with dismay Riku watched all those walls come up. Despite that, Riku can't hold back the rush of exhilaration and joy that rushes through him from his victory. A frown forms on the brunet's lips and Sora sighs in frustration, "You just have to make everything so much harder, don't you?"
So many risqué responses come to mind immediately. However, Riku can tell the brunet is at least partially legitimately angry, so he resists the perverted responses. He also understands; it would be so much easier for Sora to let Riku go rather than give him another chance. But he is persistent and unflinching—he can withstand this, for the victory is still his. Sora can have his conflicted emotions as long as they lead him back to Riku. And he is almost 100% certain they will.
Feeling mischievous, the silveret replies, "Of course, it's my specialty." Though he knows Sora would never think of it himself, Riku can't help but snicker: that could mean two things….
The brunet huffs in reply and climbs off the bunk. The creak of the stiff mattress catches the attention of Xion, who peers over the side of the bunk and exclaims, "Sora lost?"
Axel, alerted by his friend's name, looks over and lets his jaw drop. "But.. Sora… no, what have you done?!"
"Oh shut up, Axel. He won fair and square," Sora admits begrudgingly. The lithe, small body pushes itself up to the top bunk. When he turns back, the brunet's expression is one of a pout.
"I'm stunned," Axel continues, gazing at Sora as though bewildered by his defeat. Roxas pushes the redhead's shoulder and rolls his eyes. "Well, that's not too hard to do. Wait till you see me play."
Riku smirks at the blonde's sly attempt to attain Axel's attention again. Because Axel is so smitten, he completely misses the ploy, turning back in a sheepish frenzy. "Of course, Roxy," he pokes his crush's side, "I just didn't think a cutie like you would like chess."
Roxas pushes him off the bunk. "I'm not cute, you bastard." He glares at the ridiculous male on the wood floor as he rubs his side. "Ow… Roxy, why are you so meaaan to meee…?"
Even Sora snickers down at the scene. Properly subdued by the chuckles, Axel creeps back onto the bunk to pout and Sora's defeat is promptly forgotten.
Xion, undeterred, asks the general group, "So, who wants to challenge Riku next? I think Roxas is the only who hasn't played yet."
Looking back to the redhead, Roxas rolls his eyes. "Yeah, I'm on. Anything to get away from this dumbass."
He climbs off the bunk. "You wound me," Axel whines.
"I thought tough guys like you don't get wounded," Roxas comments callously.
"Hey! Tough guys have feelings too! Like pyromania, aggression, lust…"
"Pfft. What a wonderful canvas of emotions you got there," Riku joins, amused by the extravagant game of cat and mouse the two are so absorbed in.
"Okay, Axel, I'll make you a deal," the blonde says casually, seating himself across the black-clad male, "If I lose, I'll be nice to you."
"REALLY-?"
"BUT if I win, you have to leave me alone for 24 hours."
After a quick moment of silence, Axel exclaims, "I have never wanted someone to fail so badly. GO RIKU, HE'S OUR MAN, IF HE CAN'T DO IT THEN- FUCK!"
"Shut up!" Roxas scowls, retracting the hand that launched a pawn into the redhead's forehead. "Ow!" the pyromaniac complains, pouting as he returns the pawn to Riku (the safer bet). "So feisty."
Riku rolls his eyes, takes the pawn and returns it to the vacant position on the board. He turns to Roxas. "I'm not going to go easy on you either," he says, "In case you thought I was on your side."
The blonde curses under his breath but replies nonetheless, "Eh, I guess that'll make it more fun."
"That's the spirit." And Roxas moves his first piece.
Riku won the tournament. After beating Roxas, he played all those he hadn't played previously and easily dominated. However, no matter what two opponents play chess, the game itself always takes a decent amount of time. His peers didn't seem to mind, but by the time Riku became champion it was easily five in the afternoon.
The timing is flawless, however, for not soon after they pick up the board, the pieces, and the random debris (that they accumulated from being in a single cabin too long), Coach's voice booms over the PA system that supper is served. Sora, instinctually sensing doom, attempts to scramble off the bunk and escape from the cabin. However, the silveret deftly catches his wrist.
Blushing from being caught, the brunet turns around. "Sorry for the rush, but uh-" he stumbles, "I'm really hungry."
Smiling knowingly, Riku replies, "Me too. I just thought we'd all go together." Sora knows that the silveret really means him and Sora; he probably couldn't give a rat's ass about the others. However the simple statement doesn't give him very many options. Faking enthusiasm, the brunet says, "Oh, of course!"
The silveret somewhat traps the brunet by the door as they wait for the others to retrieve their shoes and gather themselves enough to leave for food. The brunet uses the moments of calm to take a few deep breaths. He knows that his brain is hardwired to push Riku away, but fate obviously decided for him; a second chance is a clean slate. Maybe if he doesn't think too hard about it, forgiveness and kindness will just come naturally. Just focus on something else.
He shifts his attention to Roxas, resisting the overwhelming sense of confusion. Lucky for Sora, the blonde certainly isn't a hard target to lock on to; the ketchup and mustard duo are so noisy and rambunctious it is hard to focus on anything but them. Their friendship is one that Sora can't quite understand. He isn't even sure if "friendship" is the right word. On the surface, anyone would say that Roxas absolutely hates Axel, if any reason, for being so hard to handle. But anyone looking closer would notice the blush on the blonde's cheeks, the proximity in which he purposefully places himself to Axel. Sora is reminded of Tom and Jerry, the old cartoon in which the mouse, Jerry, is constantly goading the cat to chase him. Why does the mouse tease the cat? Why does the cat take the bait?
Sora, not originally being his friend, doesn't know Roxas well enough to answer. So instead he looks on in wonder. He watches Xion, Ventus, T.K., Axel, and Roxas and wonders what it all means for him and Riku. Of course, no answers come but the brunet can't help but hope that his school-hardwired brain will eventually make sense of it. He hates his overly analytical brain, but his desperate search for the right answers in life and happiness seem to corner him into these same preoccupying habits. Right now, it's all too overwhelming.
The silveret unashamedly breaks the status quo by sitting next to Sora at dinner instead of across. Surprisingly enough, it actually accentuates the group more coherently, as Xion moves to sit in between Ventus and T.K. The final composition results in Roxas, Axel, Sora and Riku in that order on one side, and Ventus, Xion, T.K. and Chris on the other.
Axel pretends to shiver. "It's like watching a doppelganger," he says, glancing between Roxas and Ventus.
"Just when you thought you wanted more of me," Roxas replies casually, unimpressed by the cliché comparison between him and his twin brother.
The redhead turns to the blonde, "I always want more of you, Roxy."
'Roxy' makes a disgusted face, "You wanna rephrase that?"
"Nope."
Riku snickers. "Well at least you aren't that bad," Sora tells his silveret friend, attempting at humor.
"Like I would use pick up lines like that," Riku comments back quietly.
"Its kinda weird that Axel does that in the first place," Sora says, unsure.
"Weird, or just obvious?"
"What's obvious?" Axel and Sora ask at the same time. Axel speaks with a glare but Sora merely looks confused.
Riku raises his eyebrows and lifts his hands up in surrender. "Nothing, I said nothing."
Axel, continuing his glare until the last moment possible, turns away. Sora however persists. "No, seriously, what do you mean?"
Riku is unsure how to proceed. Sora obviously does not see the hardcore gay romance commencing on the other side of him, but the silveret doesn't want to leave his crush hanging.
"I'll tell you later," Riku says softly to the frustrated brunet. He glances to the others at the table and sends Sora a significant look as if to say 'I can't tell them'. He hopes to have several effects from this: one, that Sora will appreciate Riku telling him and not the others; two, it will satisfy Sora enough that maybe he'll forget the conversation entirely. One cannot be too careful in situations such as these, in Riku's mind.
With a slight pout, the blue eyed wonder shrugs, shifting slightly away from the ever closer silveret. Riku smiles; it's just too cute of him. It causes him to forget Mikey, just for awhile, and reminds him of all the good the silveret so desperately strived for. Riku was never one to believe that someone else could solve his problems but… well, Sora certainly seems to help by simply downsizing the past's importance. Sora is his future. Hopefully, at least. And it is a relief to head toward the future instead of trying to fix the past.
"So… when are we going to hang out again?" the brunet suddenly asks, staring at his dinner tray.
Riku looks over again, shocked. Is he for real? Twenty minutes ago he was angry! He scrambles around his brain to come up with some scenario he could commit to, stuttering, "Ye- uhh- hmm…"
And that's when it clicks. Narrowing his eyes, the turquoise orbs squint at the smirking brunet. "You just want me to tell you the thing about Axel before you forgiet, don't you?"
The cherub face slowly breaks into a mischievous smile, "Dangit! I had you going for a minute!"
"Oh, I see how it is," Riku replies, riding the banter, "You're cruel, Sor."
And finally, the brunet genuinely laughs and Riku knows that the ice is breaking.
That night, Sora lay in bed unable to sleep. He stared at the ceiling of his bunk, feeling the shift of life. He recalls The Grapes of Wrath, when Ma (main woman character) mentions that whereas women live in one swoop or flow, men tend to live in jerks; the good and the bad parts of life all like train stations where they board and leave to wait for their next train. Today, Sora boarded a train. Though the whiplash of emotions still nag at him like the waves on the Galveston shore, he feels strangely motivated, perhaps because someone finally reached their hand out to him; Riku displayed his desire to be close with him. Someone wants him around. No one hates Sora as much as Sora does, yet just the mere inclination that someone else doesn't and actually enjoys him as a person gives him a strange hope. Everyone thus far in his life, aside from his adoptive parents, let him drift away and the brunet was callous to it. But Riku didn't.
Sora had been waiting for this burst of happiness ever since his King fell, but now in the dark, the night, the quiet, the solidarity of the moment he lets it wash over him. He's excited about where this train is going; he's relieved to be heading somewhere different.
However, Sora is starting to believe that- perhaps… maybe…- he might need help. Sora feels so emotionally high-strung, physically tense, and mentally exhausted he doesn't trust, well, anything. He's gone from letting go, to taking control and chances, then to incomprehensible heartbreak, and now back taking chances and… Well, after that, he doesn't know. He doesn't understand anything lately; what he should be doing, how he should be feeling, and even whether, and then what, he should be learning from all this chaos. He understood being depressed, as he had been so recently, but he didn't understand this faith and hope that he acted upon.
And what exactly is he hoping for? He has faith and hope that Riku will be the friend he was before but… can the past be repeated? No. Sora knows that. So what is he doing, giving second chances and re-trusting? Maybe he has some hope that it'll even be better than before. Sora still holds onto the fact that after this camp is over, none of this drama and confusion will matter, yet he still wants to do the right thing. The brunet is also drawn into the intricacies of his new friends and himself, suspecting that maybe if he just got his head on straight he could actually learn something from all of this and maybe become someone he doesn't have to hate. Maybe even become someone who doesn't have to wait for Miracles.
Sora thinks its time to talk to Axel.
Riku woke up the next day with a text from his mom (first one throughout the entire summer thus far). It surprised the silveret enough to open up his phone and actually read it. The content was worth the effort as well:
"Hey Ri baby! I hve a surprise 4 u! I got a different apartment. It's still in Houston but u got zoned to a different school 4 nxt yr. Srry boo, but I think it'll b a good change. :-) Hope u r having fun! We'll talk more when u get home. TTFN ~Mom"
Riku at first simply stares at the screen, not entirely sure how to feel about the sudden and undisputed change. Normally, his mom would allow him to have a say in such a decision. However, in all honesty, that is the only quarrel he has with this change. As long as he doesn't go to the apartment and find a strange man living and kissing his mother, he honestly won't care at all about the move. As for the new school, well, that doesn't matter to him much either. After Mikey passed, Riku didn't have anyone he wanted to talk to. Sure, being a senior at a familiar school would have had some perks but the whole high-school seniority principle never mattered to him much.
He wonders where Sora will be calling home after camp. He assumes somewhere Southern due to his mild use of the slang word "y'all" but that only narrows the possibilities down to a third of the nation. He sighs. Hopefully the brunet hasn't had to deal with a lot of moving around, for although Riku accepts such changes easily, Sora doesn't even deserve such tumultuous events. For Riku though, this sudden change of plans will allow him a fresh start, which will facilitate the perseverance of Riku's personal changes. In realizing this, the silveret becomes more convinced that fate smiles on those who work to better themselves and that maybe life can start heading towards the better for both of them. He hopes that his brunet counterpart will receive such graces soon as well.
Today's activities separate the boys from the girls so that they can participate in football and volleyball respectively. Ironically, but unsurprisingly, Xion ends up with the boys. Luckily for her, however, she also ends up on the same team as Axel, Sora, and T.K. who compete for the spotlight, detracting attention and possibilities and harm away from her. The sport also serves the brunet's purposes too. Although not Sora's favorite sport by any means, football gives him an opportunity to spend some time with Axel in the hopes of finding a way to talk to him alone. He just hopes his social skills max out for this time so that the redhead doesn't disregard Sora's attempts due to his awkward disposition.
It takes awhile, but Sora's efforts to play simultaneously with Axel proves fruitful in the end when the Coach sends both of them to the bench to allow others a chance to play. Exhausted from purposefully tackling Roxas repeatedly on the field, Axel nearly collapses onto the bench, breathing heavily. Also tired from running and dodging tackles, Sora plops himself on the ground next to the sweating redhead, wiping the sweat on his brow onto his loose t-shirt.
"I never thought you'd be the one to play football," Sora says, panting.
"I don't…. But I do play rugby and Quiditch." The pyromaniac smirks, stroking his long hair out of his face.
"That would explain the roughness," Sora replies, laughing.
"Oh no, that's just for Roxy." Sora, instead of responding, looks at the redhead curiously. Soon after though, the light-bulb over this head flickers on.
"It's crazy how you and Roxas have become friends…" Sora begins hesitantly. "We really need to catch up, I feel like I'm missing something here," the brunet finishes, ending lightly and somewhat bashfully.
The redhead laughs knowingly. "Well, I think you're right," he lightly punches Sora's shoulder, "We need to hang out again, catch up like old pals. I guess we got so caught up being social butterflies we forgot about each other." Axel can obviously only count himself in the last sentence, but he includes Sora as well presumably to open the initial door of friendliness.
Sora sends him a genuine smile, "Definitely. How about after the football game we play cards?"
Axel's green eyes gaze up at the sky with a finger at his chin, pretending to consider it. "What the hell, why not?" Axel grins, "I get to decide what game though."
The brunet shrugs. "Sure, I don't mind."
"That's the fucking spirit!" Axel rapidly turns his head away, as if he heard his name. "Ah, shit, Coach is calling me. Well, see yah!" He stands, brushing off his knees. "Good to have you back, Sora.," he says, finally, and walks from the bench, jogging to get into the team formation.
Yeah, it is.
Riku would think it'd be easy to find Sora after the strenuous football game; afterward, despite victory or defeat, many players were too exhausted to wander around too much. After the showering frenzy and the rapid and haphazard change of clothes, the camp generally died down. Only the girls seemed energized, swimming and giggling at each other in their bikinis.
Of course, the only reason Riku would know this has nothing to do with the ladies themselves, but rather that the silveret felt the best way to find the brunet would be by asking them. He knew Sora wouldn't be with them due to the water that accompanies a pool, but he was hoping he'd at least get a direction.
"Hey girls," Riku says coolly, trying his best to sound disinterested in them so they wouldn't make a big deal of his presence.
"Oh, hey, Riku!" One young lady responds, recognizing the silveret immediately. She smiles sweetly at him. "What're you doing over here?"
Suddenly another swims over to him, adding, "Why don't you come swimming with us?"
"Oh, uh, no thanks," Riku responds politely, "I just showered. I'm actually just stopping by to ask if you ladies would know where Sora is."
The girls almost erupt into giggles, though a few look on disgustedly. He isn't sure if they are disgusted at the giggling girls or him, but he lets the situation go, not wanting to goad them on.
Mid-giggle, one girl responds, "I saw him about hour ago heading to the showers but…"
"Yeah, that's a bit too long ago," Riku replies, somewhat annoyed. He's about to ask again with more specifics when he hears his name.
"Hey, Riku!" a familiar voice suddenly calls. The silveret turns, relieved to have a reason to turn away from the girls. Behind him, Roxas and Xion approach clad in towels and swimming gear.
"Hey, Roxas… Xion," Riku greets. "Are you guys seriously going to swim after all that?"
Roxas shrugs. "I couldn't find Axel so I figured why not. I passed Xion on the way to our cabins and she said she wanted to join."
"She?" the silveret replies, confused.
"Oh yeah, you were sick that day…"
Xion suddenly speaks, "Sorry for lying, Riku."
Taken aback by the clearly female voice, Riku replies, "Uh… it's no problem, you never actually spoke so… I'm just uh, surprised is all."
Xion laughs a little, "I surprised everyone. It was kind of silly to hide it in the first place, but here we are. I'm surprised you didn't hear me talking to Ventus and T.K. this morning."
Riku nods. He hears some girls in the pool behind him gasp and whisper a bit. "Cat's out of the bag now for sure," the silveret responds, tilting his head to indicate the girls behind him. Xion shrugs in reply.
"Well, anyway, Riku," Roxas starts, impatient, "You want to swim with us? We'll wait for you."
"Uh…" Riku hesitates, what about finding Sora? Well… maybe it'd be a good idea to give him space today. I wanted to tell him about my moving though. A girl's voice jolts him from his thoughts, "Come on, Riku, it'll be fun!" The silveret is doubtful, but he finally decides it'd be good to hang out with Roxas for a bit without Axel following him around for once. Where is he anyway? He sighs.
"Sure, just give me a few minutes. I'll be back."
"Cool, see you in a few!" Roxas replies enthusiastically, granting him a rare small smirk. Riku lifts up a hand in a lazy wave and heads back to the cabins.
Axel and Sora camp out behind the cafeteria on a park-type table after the post-football hype calms. Few people come by the area, so it is a good place to speak freely. The redhead sits across from Sora, shuffling the cards quietly and humming a happy tune, seemingly amused already. Sora waits patiently, enjoying the slight breeze of the evening and the darkening yellow sky.
"Looks like we'll only get a few rounds," Sora comments, gazing around, "The sun's already going down."
"We should be alright… you'd think they'd set up a goddamn light out here."
Sora laughs, "Yeah, well, you never know with this camp."
"It certainly has been an experience," Axel replies with a small snort, uncharacteristically calm and serious.
"I don't think anyone expected this camp to be what it is," Sora continues.
"No kidding. I was damn sure I'd have been kicked out by now."
"Seems like Roxas gets the blunt of all your mischief," Sora replies lightly, joking.
"Ah, you are so right. I suppose I ought to thank him for putting up with my bullshit, right?"
Sora laughs genuinely, "That's up to you, but I can't say I'd be able to withstand it!"
"Your honesty wounds me, Sora, what about all the things I've done for you!?"
"What, dying Riku's hair? …Well, now that I think about it, that was pretty funny."
"I could do it again," Axel replies jokingly, wiggling his eyebrows.
"Pfft. He'd know it was you now."
"Sigh. The loss of anonymity is the worst," the redhead replies, mocking sadness and returning to his somber calm.
"And I thought I was overdramatic," Sora says teasingly.
"Hey, I'm theatrical, Sora, there is a difference," Axel replies affronted.
The brunet laughs, "If you say so…" Axel begins dealing cards and Sora picks up his, ordering them from twos to aces.
"Alright, do you have the two of spades? Whoever has it, or a two of anything, starts."
Sora lays down his two of clubs, beginning their game. "So…" Sora begins, unsure of how to proceed, "How's life?"
"Mm," he lays down a card, "Just dandy, actually. Glad to be away from home."
"Oh? I never got your story."
Axel snorts again. "No one has 'my story', doofus…" When Sora stays silent, the redhead continues, "But, long story short, I have terrible fucking parents who send me away whenever possible. Of course, I don't make it easy for them anymore, and I make it goddamn difficult for them legally whenever possible but as soon as I turn eighteen I'm disappearing from them. Never to fucking return. I'll become a pirate or something."
He adds on the last sentence to lighten the mood, but Sora can tell he holds a lot of anger towards his upbringing. "Ah, I see… I'm sorry," Sora replies sympathetically; he can certainly relate to such anger. He lays down a card and draws another, waiting for Axel to continue the game and conversation.
"It's alright, it's just what I've got to deal with. Like I said, it's been nice here, to get away and not worry about, well, anything. And what about you, shortie?"
"Pfft, Axel, I'm not short, you're just tall…" Axel snickers but doesn't respond, placing another card down. "I'm alright… well. Sort of. I'm actually very confused. I was actually hoping you'd be able to help me."
Axel laughs inexplicably and replies, "Man, why is everyone coming to me for advice? Of all fucking people!" He continues to laugh while Sora attempts to push aside his jealously and anger; of course he isn't supposed to understand what Axel means, but after overhearing his conversation with Riku he can't help but feel bitter about the experience.
"I don't know, I guess you seem trustworthy."
"That's a load of bull, but I get where you're coming from," Axel sighs, "Well, what's been bugging you?"
"I'm not even sure where to start…"
"Start with the first thing that comes to mind," the redhead replies encouragingly.
"Well… Okay. To start off, I've never had close friends like this. I'm kind of used to people befriending me and then drifting away. I don't really open up to anyone like this…" Sora lays down a card, thinking about how to proceed.
"Okay…so trust issues."
"Y-yeah, you can say that."
"Most people have those; anyway, continue," Axel ends, placing another card on the pile.
"Well… I guess I'll just start it this way," Sora says quietly, mostly to himself, and continues, "I grew up on a weird belief system. My parents are heavy believers in fate and what they call miracles," Pause, he lays down a card, "They are like… well, like when you get a joker in this game. It can change the whole round, and gives you a huge advantage. For my dad, he always says his miracle was meeting my mom. Does that make sense?"
"Yeah, I think so… It's like life gives you a 'get out of jail free card' that allows you to change your life to be better. Thus, a miracle."
"Yeah, like that. See, when I came to this camp, I figured nothing could happen here because nothing that happens here will matter when we go home. But obviously… well, even you know… a lot of crap has gone down."
Axel snorts, "You're telling me."
"Exactly. And so now, with everything that's gone on, I just feel so… lost. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do or take away from it."
"You're saying a miracle, as you defined it, happened to you here?"
"Well, no- But, well... Maybe? I honestly never thought about it as that," Sora replies, unsure, watching as Axel plays a card.
"Think about it. You're saying that though you thought nothing could happen here, things have happened- things that seemed to have changed you. That sounds like a miracle to me."
"I-I guess you're right." The brunet lets that sink in for a moment; a Miracle has happened to him here. Sure, he's thought that before, and even wished it, but confronting it as fact was disconcerting. Sora plays a card and Axel follows suit.
"What do you think has changed?" Axel asks, re-ordering his cards.
Sora hadn't thought about that either. He takes a moment to consider before replying, "I want things to be more… simple." Sora thinks about Xion. "I want my past to stay there, and I want to… I don't know… more forward."
Axel smiles, "I'd say those are some pretty damn good changes. But only you can make those changes happen." Sora lays a card down.
"You're definitely right about that, but I don't know how to make that happen…" the brunet confesses, feelings tears scratch at the sides of his eyes. "I hate feeling so helpless."
Axel pauses, clearly unsure how to deal with tears. He puts down his cards and utilizes his long arms to firmly place his hand on Sora's shoulder. "Hey. I'm not good at all this mushy shit, but I can tell you it's okay to not know. It's okay to be unsure. Everyone needs help sometimes, and even though you chose the worst person to go to…" Axel pauses, letting Sora laugh at the redheads insult on himself, "You've done the right thing…. Uh, alright?"
With a rough sniff, Sora nods. "I know, I just haven't been able to ….talk. You know?"
"I understand completely. Why do you think I never shut up?" He winks, attempting to lighten the mood. Sora responds with a watery smile. "Now, do you want my advice now?"
"Absolutely. But no more clichés," the brunet jokes.
"Damn, well I'm out of ideas."
"Hey!"
"Ha! Just kidding, Sora. You remind me of Roxy sometimes. You're just nicer." Sora makes a disgusted face. "Uh… thanks?"
"Yeah, anyway, as I was saying: Advice. Whenever I need… direction, like you do, I look to something I can pursue. Kind of like a goal. For example, when I came back to this camp, I wanted to light the whole place on fire and just run. However, I met Roxas."
"How did that help?" Sora asks confusedly.
"He is something I can focus on that is tangible. He is in the here and now. He keeps me focused on now and the future, and I let go of what happened in the past. I know I'll have to face those demons, but I can do that later. For now, I can stay in the sanctuary of distraction until I am emotionally capable of facing it."
"But isn't that using him?"
Axel shrugs, "You can think of it like that, but I'm not harming him." Sora looks at him doubtfully. Axel laughs, "Okay, I make him put up with a lot of my crap, but I'm still offering friendship and companionship. If I really thought I was harming him, I would have stopped bothering him forever ago. Not only that…. Helping each other is what friendship is all about. I know that sounds like bullshit coming from me, but I am a much better person with friends than when without. It's just human nature to need others for comfort and accountability."
"But what if they hurt you?" Sora asks desperately. Why would he need anyone else? Everyone, aside from Riku recently, has abandoned him, so why would he indulge in companionship now?
Axel sighs, "That's the risk with anything. But you have to make mistakes to find out what you need. Heartbreak finds you no matter what precautions you take, but it can be worth it in the end."
The brunet eventually nods, reluctantly realizing that the redhead has a point. Obviously Sora has been heartbroken many times despite not committing to anyone; what's the difference, then, between being alone or not? Sora can't think of anything except that at least with friends, he wouldn't have to go through every emotion and every event alone. Axel is definitely right about one thing; it would be much easier for Sora to be 'better' if someone else was there to at least help him along.
"So… I need to find something, or someone, to commit to, so that I can focus on the present instead of the past." Axel nods, agreeing, "That's what helps me."
"Okay,…" Sora accepts, playing his last card. As neither one of them are sure of who won or lost, they leave the deck on the table still. "I have one more question, then, Axel."
"Alright, shoot."
"What made you choose Roxas?" Sora can feel finality within his grasp; Axel chose Roxas and this entire time, they have been somewhat twinned with himself and Riku. If Sora can perhaps understand Axel and Roxas's relationship, maybe he can better understand his and Riku's. And then he'll know what to do. He is sure of it.
However, Axel looks hesitant. He coughs, "That's… actually a bit more complicated, not to mention personal. You want to hear weird?"
Sora nods, sending him a questioning glance. The redhead sighs, placing his elbows on the table and folding his fingers delicately, as if the action could hold the delicate conversation in balance. "Alright, I guess it's my turn to confess my problems." Sora waits patiently, unsure as to what exactly his problem could be with Roxas.
"I am, God forbid, in love with him."
The sky is dark when Riku leaves the pool. Roxas, Xion, and many of the girls had already left, but the silveret had felt so calm in the water, he stayed. The girls luckily left him alone mostly, and he sat soaking on the middle step into the pool for the longest time, gazing up. All those stars again. With the city so far away, with his life so far away, it was easy to be allured into their beauty and entranced into near sleep. He lost track of time imaging fantasies for the future as if each star was a new memory to his life, thinking as though speaking to his late Mikey. If anyone would understand Riku's dreams, it'd be him. Even though he cannot listen with his ears, the silveret just knew that Mikey could somehow hear them. It brought him comfort.
He stood and stepped out of the water not sad, but peaceful and sleepy. Keeping with the calm and quiet of the night, Riku makes his way silently back to the cabins, drowsily pondering what tomorrow might bring.
"Riku?" another familiar voice rings out behind him as he takes his first step onto the cabins' stairs. His face lights up, and his body turns.
"Sora! I was looking for you earlier. Where've you been?" The silveret knows his voice is probably too calm and sweet, and his eyes too tender and soft, but he can't help it right now. All he can control is his words.
Sora seems distracted, thankfully, though a blush paints his cheeks. His feet shuffle, his hands in his pockets. Riku's tired eyes only perceive awkwardness, but it doesn't deter him. "Oh, I was playing cards with Axel."
Riku chuckles, "You kicked his ass right?" Sora looks anxious to respond but Riku continues, "Oh, I'm sorry I never told you about the comment I said earlier today. I can tell you tomorrow when I can think straight, if you'd like."
Sora shakes his head, smiling, "No, no, its alright, I think I actually understand now. Axel and I got to talk a lot."
The dots still aren't connecting for Riku, and so the silveret only smiles back, unshocked by Sora's discovery. "That's good. I guess that explains why Roxas couldn't find Axel earlier either."
"Yeah…. You look really tired, Riku." Sora looks understanding, but a little disappointed.
"I'm sorry, I guess I tackled you too much," Riku replies, sheepish and unsure what Sora could be disappointed about. "We can hang out tomorrow though. We still have a full week… I think."
"Somewhere around there," Sora agrees, smiling forgivingly. Riku smiles back, but it is soon broken by a yawn that possess his body enough to make it stretch. Sora laughs, "Yeah you should really go to bed. What happened to being a night owl?"
"Pfft. You killed that for me, dork."
"My fault?" Sora pouts.
Riku chuckles, "Yeah, your fault." Sora's eyes shine brightly back at him, clearly conveying contentedness. "Seriously dude, go to bed."
"Fine, fine, I am," Riku replies, shuffling toward his cabin door. His hand get to turning the doorknob when he suddenly feels warmth spread all along his back and a pair of arms enwrap his abdomen.
"Thank you, Riku," Sora says, voice muffled by Riku's towel hanging across his shoulders.
Taken aback, Riku replies dumbly, "For what?"
"Being here," the cherub brunet answers. He releases the silveret and takes a step back. Riku turns to look at him again. Sora's cheeks are even redder than before, though the moon does not help the male's tan at all. Even without Riku's glasses, the sight is beautiful in his eyes. Riku smiles softly, about to reply, when Sora interrupts quietly, "Goodnight, Riku."
The silveret nods, somewhat understanding, "Goodnight, Sor." And they disappear behind their cabin doors, ready to let the light of day open up the new chapters of their lives, despite questions and insecurity on what the future may bring.
A/N: It's been a loooong time X_X I'm sorry :( (fluff at the end helps ebb the anger, yes?) But, summer is starting! NO MORE SCHOOL YES. SENIOR-NESS, HERE I COME!
Though, back to the story, Sora finally understands :D Only a little further and I can draw this story to a close... As it has covered nearly a whole year of my life now, I'm excited and sad to see it all coming together. BUT It's not over yet so please look forward to the next chapter! :) Please read and review if you would like, and I will response ASAP :D Till next time:
Hannahble
