Chapter Five, Moreover Onto the Last One

ˆˇˆˇˆˇI never really knew why people didn't think I wasn't actually a host, and I was just Honey's pet servant, or something, but it's easy enough to wait for a chance like this one, to figure out why people ever thought a person like Setsuko Haninozuka would keep a servant around, and treat him like he was entitled to boss him around… well, let's just say that there're a lot of badguys still in Japanese media, and that anime gives me a bad rap, because of it.
ˆˇˆˇˆˇSetsuko doesn't really like the idea that anyone would think he wasn't just a prodigy who graduated the earlier grades quickly, to move up into high school, but the idea that you'd need that explained to you just to believe he's a little kid, is kind of strange, too, and I know it's a lot less strange than the fact that nobody wise in the ways of the world ever keeps a name they don't like, so why in the world do you think I would let anyone call me Takashi, if I didn't enjoy the sound of it.
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Setsuko, there're a lot of lovely ladies here today," I said to my little homie, who nodded his head, and gave me a sideways, phony glower.
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"You're not allowed to canoodle with teachers, Takashi, the way you canoodle with the other girls we bring into the host club," he told me. It was a lot funnier when he could keep himself from grinning like an idiot and laughing about it.
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Yes but these girls aren't even at the host club, really, so I'm not even sure what you're talking about, any longer. Oh, hey! Looks, guests, I'd better go and talk to some of them."
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Better behave, Takashi. You never know what sort of trouble you might get into without my knowing what to dooo about iiiit!" He shouted the last part because I'd taken the chance to hurry away and over to one of the teachers I wanted to talk to.
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Welcome to our picnic," I said to her, grabbing a plate to stack, quickly, using the tongs, grabbing a few sweets, and smiling at Onishi-sensei. "Can I get you something to eat, maybe from one of the other tables? You look a little perturbed, is all, I thought a refreshment might-"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"What's your role in all this, Takashi? What do you get out of it?" She was straight to the point, on this one, and I wondered if she wasn't exactly one of our fans, just yet, anyway.
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"I like to talk to people. Would you like me to prove it?" I sat down across from her, and took a sip of one of the untouched glasses of orange juice, there on the table, still yet untouched, but she didn't seem to think they were fresh enough, or something. "How old are you, if you don't mind my asking?"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Why would you think I might not mind you asking me a question like that, Takashi Morinozuka? Are you slow today, or something?"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Well, you might not know why I asked you, anyway. I happen to like older women than I am, so if you said thirteen, or fourteen, I might not waste my time here, you know?"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Oh, and how much older did you think was acceptable for a boy of your age and standing, hmm?"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"My age and standing? Well I'm pretty tall now, if that's what you meant by standing, and as far as age goes, well…" I pointed over at Setsuko, who was talking to a bunch of the younger girls, still. Child. "He's in my year, still, but clearly, he's waaay younger than I am. So really, I'm plenty old enough to figure who I want to be the same age as, you know?"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"The same age? You expect me to believe you've been at Ouran longer than little old me?"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Sure enough, I might not have. How long ago did you get here? I'm only a student, so… maybe you don't know how long it even took me to get to high school, or why I still go here, after all these years."
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Really? That's intriguing, Takashi. I wonder, though; are you trying to make a pass at a-"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Hey Mori-senpai, how come- Oh! Sorry, hey Onishi-sensei, I didn't mean to interrupt." It was Haruhi Fujioka, of course, and she always seemed to arrive right on time, for this sort of thing, to interrupt when a guest might be digging herself into a hole she didn't really want to be in without me.
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Hello Haruhi, sorry to cut this short, but I don't know if I'm really cut out to be hosted, or anything. It was a nice-"
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Unless you don't want to see the show, you should probably stick around, for a while."
ˆˇˆˇˆˇ"Oh, there's a show?" She looked curious, and I knew she wasn't going to make it to the show, in time.