A/N: Not me going radio silent on AO3 hahahahah! Life has been hectic and busy but anywho, here's a funny, silly drabble that Seas (SeasOfSilver) and I have played around with! She's always full of amazing ideas and prompts lol. It's based on some of my experiences with the covid tests and boom this story was born. Enjoy!
"Oh, oh
Can we take it nice and slow, slow?
Break it down and drop it low, low
'Cause I just wanna party all night in the neon lights
'Til you can't let me go"
Slow Down - Selena Gomez
~(x)~
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Adrien hadn't moved, hadn't blinked, hadn't been able to function since he saw the image on Marinette's post as he scrolled through his Instagram feed out of boredom and curiosity.
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A white object with a single red line, and the caption "Negative! ? ".
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He didn't even need to look at the hashtags to know why exactly someone would be relieved to get a negative result on a white test stick. He didn't dare to look further.
His stomach lurched and his heart jumped to his throat, and he felt like he couldn't even breathe. Marinette had- had- done it with someone else.
'Not me...wait- not me?'
He didn't have time to unpack the thought and the emotions it had unleashed within him, because-
"LOOK OUT!"
CRASH!
BANG!
A roller-skating Alix collided with Marinette, who had been ever-so-carefully carrying a large box with her family bakery logo. Adrien didn't even register running over to Marinette, only that he was now by her side, thoroughly checking her over for any injuries, and he couldn't help but pay particular attention to her stomach, even though he knew what "negative" meant.
"Are you okay?" he asked breathily. He hadn't meant for his voice to be that soft, that full of affection, that lovin-
Her gaze was somewhere else.
"No!" she cried. "The cakes! These were for the activities for today's classes!"
She made to crawl over to the bakery box a few metres ahead of her, but she recoiled instantly, clutching her ankle with an inaudible gasp. Seeing her in pain set his nerves alight, so he swept her up in his arms, carrying her bridal style.
"Those cakes are replaceable; you, however, are not. Let's go to the nurse's office, shall we?"
Without waiting for an answer, he walked off with her in his arms effortlessly. The nurse thanked Adrien for bringing Marinette to him and dismissed the boy so he could go to class. Reluctantly, he departed (not before telling Marinette to text him if she needed absolutely anything, no matter how small the favour) and grumbled his way into his seat beside Nino, who was busy chatting away with Alya.
"I'm so glad for Mari, though! I was so worried she got COVID, so the negative result was a relief!"
Adrien practically choked on his saliva and then proceeded to quickly turn around and face Alya with an astonished gape. Relief filled his entire being from head to toe as his mind fumbled with what to say next and his traitorous, confusing heart rejoiced within his chest. So of course, he spoke without thinking.
"It was just a covid test!? Really?!"
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He didn't expect the instant silence that spread across the entire class like a fog, everyone now looking at him as if he suddenly grew two heads or something just as bizarre. That was until an unholy smirk naturally found its way on Alya's pretty face and she leaned forward to the sunshine boy like a little fox who was up to no good.
"Yes, it was just a covid test...what did you think it was, Adrien~?" Her glasses glinted just like the way his favourite anime characters' would when they had a diabolical plan or something just as sinister and immediately Adrien had an indescribable urge to dart out of the classroom as fast as his alter-ego's namesake. Unfortunately for the boy, Alya didn't even give him a chance to contemplate a solid plan or excuse to escape and she was quick to carry on with a smile that would give the Cheshire cat a run for its money. "My, my, my...you didn't think it was that did you?"
"Th-Think that it was what? Hehehe- I have no idea what you're talking about! I mean! Yeah, I absolutely knew it was a covid test! How could it be anything else but that? Ahahah! I'm not that dumb-"
Alya suddenly stood up, her pearly whites flashing sinisterly whilst everyone in the class mimicked her expression like evil minions in the background.
"No wonder you were so irritated and pissy all day! You- you ACTUALLY thought that she got laid by someone else and couldn't stand the idea at all! Ahhahahahah!" Alya cackled heartily, deaf to the embarrassed, red-as-a-tomato Adrien who tried his best to protest and even lie his way out. His ears virtually caught on fire as the majority of the class joined in the laughter, tears pouring out of Kim's eyes, Nathaniel pounding a fist on the desk as he roared in hysterics, Rose literally on the floor clutching her stomach and of course, Nino wheezing against the wall from all the snickering that escaped his lungs.
This is it.
This is his life.
Adrien Agreste shall now forever be known as the guy who mistook a covid test for a pregnancy test.
He was so fucking doomed!
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"What's going on?" Marinette appeared at the door, leaning on a crutch to assist her injured ankle and confusion written all over her face. However, all that her classmates (sans a blubbering, discombobulated Adrien Agreste) did was roar even louder in laughter as if they've witnessed the biggest joke in the century. Nino was the next to have fallen to the ground, trying his everything to calm down and even ChloƩ was trying her best and failing in hiding her chortles behind her perfectly manicured hands, unable to stick to her usual snarkiness and rude comments.
"No! Don't listen to them!" Adrien blurted, attempting to rush towards his adorably baffled friend, only to get tackled to the ground by both Nino and Ivan who delivered a grin more satanic than even the scariest of Akumas he's ever fought. "Marinette! Cover your ears!" He tried again with his pleading emerald greens.
Sadly, it seemed like that luck wasn't on his side for the umpteenth time and Alya opened her mouth.
"Monsieur. Smartypants here mistook your covid test as a pregnancy test and got so mad because he wanted to be the one to pop your cherry! Hahahah! Luckily for him, that opportunity is still on the table, right~?"
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Marinette proceeded to faint right after that.
~(x)~
When Marinette finally came to, she groggily noted that she was back in the nurse's room at school and that unfortunately, her ankle was still injured. Then, she managed to notice two hushed voices squabbling on the chair by her side, one more strangely nasal and somewhat inhuman than the other. Yet, both were more familiar than she could comprehend and the deja vu was indescribable.
Silently and moving as little as possible, she moved her head to the side so that she could see what the commotion was all about, only for the blood to freeze in her veins in an instant.
"Will you quit it!? I just want five minutes, five minutes of you NOT making fun of me, you insufferable floating stomach!" Adrien hissed, teeth gnashing together and stray blond strands of hair comically sticking upright like an angry cat yowling at an intruder. His companion on the other hand was completely undeterred.
"Better to be a floating stomach than to let the whole world know that you can't tell the difference between a covid test and a pregnancy test-"
"They look exactly the same-"
"And then confirming everyone's suspicions of you wanting to put a baby in Princesse!"
"Plagg!?" Adrien slumped on the seat in defeat with his complexion completely flustered, a permanent pout now on his lips as the little kwami burst out into more obnoxious cackles, not even trying to be quiet.
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"Uh-oh." Plagg silenced himself immediately, freezing in front of Marinette's face who was more than wide awake. His tiny face perfectly mirrored the expressions Chat Noir would make whenever he was in a huge pinch or did something so stupid it was guaranteed to receive a verbal lashing from her. Adrien's eyes almost bulged out of their sockets as he realised what was going on, his skin turning ashen. With a hysterical, maniacal giggle, Marinette swiftly turned around to the other side and pulled the blankets over her frame.
"This is totally just a dream, ahahahha! No way this is real- ahahahah! As if Adrien is my silly Chaton and as if that's Plagg teasing him, ahahhaha! As if the love of my life wants to put a baby in me, wow! What a funny dream!" Unfortunately for Marinette, this wasn't something she can sleep away.
"What do you mean as if I'm Chat Noir!? I totally am charming and cute enough to be him! And what's wrong with me wanting you to have my babies!?" Adrien immediately bit his tongue when he realised that he blabbed without thinking again, his shocked expression meeting hers when she turned around to face him once more. Then, he finally used his brain and leaned closer. "My Lady? C'est toi...?" And even closer. "I'm the love of your life?"
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She fainted again.
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"I don't think you'll be able to make babies with her any time soon with the way things are going, kid."
"PLAAAAAGG!?"
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~(x)~
A/N: Now feed us your comments. n o w.
