Fated to Love You
notes: uh hehe. hi gaiz.
SORRY FOR BEING MIA I PROMISE I'M STILL ALIVE AND KICKING school's started though and i'll try to write but definitely no promises
i re-discovered this song (tswizzle what uppppp lol) a few days ago and immediately thought of nalu. it's set in college again, because i'm in college and college aus are just fucking adorable. i used a lot of au ideas i found on tumblr in this one. :D it's disjointed and messy but that's kinda how i wanted it to be because their love was messy (but true) and yeah. idk. i just had to write this. it's not great but it's something. lemme know what you think?
also any aus you guys would like to see? i found a list of cute good kid/troublemaker aus on tumblr that i'm definitely gonna use.
disclaimer: Taylor Swift owns the song "The Way I Loved You" not me TT_TT
the way I loved you
i.
He is sensible and so incredible
And all my single friends are jealous
We meet as two college students often do: at a club meeting.
He approaches me after with a kind smile and sweet words and when he asks for my number, I give it to him easily.
We text a lot and meet up for study dates in coffee shops and empty classrooms and when he meets my friends, he charms them all immediately.
"He's great," they gush.
"Cute and smart," they giggle.
"You're so lucky, Lucy."
I smile.
ii.
Lucy sighed heavily again as another argument broke out a few tables down from her with consistently increasing volume. She rubbed her forehead and glared at the troublemakers in question, a dark-haired boy who seemed to have lost his shirt and a pink-haired one—pink!—in a warm-looking scarf despite the summer weather.
She waited for them to realize where they were and sit back down like they had the many times before, but this time they balled their hands into fists and looked to be moments away from an all-out fight.
Her eyes widened.
Oh no. No no no no no. She could not deal with this right now; it was finals week and she need to actually study and this was the damn library so—
"You two, shut up!" She didn't even realize she had shot up from her seat, almost knocking her chair over. Her body had completely moved without her voluntary consent. The two boys whipped their heads to stare at her, along with every other student in the room. Her cheeks burned but she didn't back down because she was furious. "You are in the library, for god's sake, and in case you hadn't realized, it is finals week and that means people actually need to study and I swear to god if you two don't shut the hell up or get the hell out, I will yell at you for the next five minutes and get us all kicked out!"
They stood, gaping and shell-shocked. When whispers broke out, they shook off their stupor and exchanged meek glances before nodding and sitting down, mouthing apologies to her and everyone else. She rolled her eyes and collapsed back into her seat, preparing to block out her mortification and judging eyes and actually get some goddamn studying done.
She didn't notice a pair of curious dark eyes darting to her every few minutes.
iii.
He opens up my door and
I get into his car and he says
"You look beautiful tonight"
And I feel perfectly fine
Our first date is a nice dinner in a classy restaurant. He picks me up right on time and is a perfect gentleman, looking as dashing and neat as ever. The food is delicious and conversation is interesting.
We talk about everything from books to dancing to talking cats. We don't talk about my father, who stopped treating my like a daughter and more like an asset when my mother died twelve years ago, or his high school career as the underling of a bully.
We study together, exercise together, cook together, eat together, travel together—day trips only—and spend a lot of time together. We do not sleep together. I do not try to steal his clothes because they are large and comfy and smell like him and he does not try to kiss me until after I initiate our first one at the end of our seventh date. My friends still coo at me about how adorable we are.
It's not much, but I'm comfortable.
iv.
Lucy poked her head into the kitchen and froze.
Then she lunged into the room and began searching frantically.
"Shit," she cursed. "Shit! I could've sworn—I know I left them here—goddamn it, where are they—"
She fumbled around for a stressed ten minutes before trying the one place she hadn't wanted to try: the dishwasher. With a deep sense of foreboding, she pulled down the door and nearly broke down into an angry heap of tears at the sight of the plate she had used to hold her cookies sitting clean and dripping in the dishwasher.
Her muffled sobs turned into stuttered gasps as her exhaustion caught up with her and she realized she wouldn't have time to bake a new batch of cookies for class. It was already five AM and she should have been asleep ages ago, except she'd had loads of homework and she still had essays to write. And class was in three hours! She had only finished baking the cookies an hour ago and came to see if they'd cooled, but someone had eaten them all.
"What the fuck—who the fuck—they were my cookies, mine, what shithead eats cookies that belong to someone else, Jesus Christ, I even put it in the corner so people wouldn't notice, goddammit, what do I do—"
"Um, are...you okay?"
Lucy's head snapped up and she stared in humiliated shock at the pink-haired boy she'd yelled at in the library before winter break. She had seen him a few times since then with his friends, who were all equally as rowdy as he and his dark-haired stripper friend.
She knew she looked blotchy as hell from her crying so she quickly covered her face and sniffled into her hoodie. "Fine!"
"You don't sound fine."
"Well, actually, I'm not fine! Some bastard ate my cookies and I need them for class and I don't have time to bake them again and fuck my life!"
"Oh. Shit. Cookies."
His guilty voice made her slowly look up and stare at him. "Yes. Cookies. You wouldn't happen to know what happened to them, would you?"
He sheepishly scratched the back of his head. "See, the thing is—"
"Oh god," she moaned. "Why the fuck would you eat someone else's cookies? I spent two hours on those things and—and shit!"
"Hey, you left them there! I thought they were for the dorm!"
"Well, you fucking thought wrong!" she screeched, springing up and attacking him with her arms and legs.
"Ow-hey, look, I'm sorry! I'm—ow, hey, that hurts—I'm sorry, okay! Look, I'll help you make them again!"
"Go to hell!" She continued pummeling him in the chest and sides as angry tears streamed down her face.
"Hey—wait—stop—hey—hey!" He caught her arms and prevented her from hitting him. He winced when her foot met sharply with his shin but soldiered on. "Look, I'm really sorry, Lucy. I'll help you make them again, promise. I'll even get my friends to help out. Okay? You're right, I shouldn't have assumed and eaten all the cookies."
She stilled and yanked her arms away, wiping violently at her face. "Fine. Sorry for...going berserk on you. I just—I'm really stressed and I still have so much homework left to do and I just don't have time for this, you know, and I—"
"Okay, shh, shh, breathe. It's okay, I got you." He grinned. "I'll help you make the best damn cookies to ever exist."
She glared at him half-heartedly and giggled. "God, I'm such a mess. I'm gonna go wash my face. I'll be right back. Thanks...Natsu, right? I hear your friends yell for you all the time."
He groaned. "They're all dumb. Ignore them."
She laughed and turned to go but then paused and looked at him curiously. "How did you know my name?"
v.
He can't see the smile I'm faking
And my heart's not breaking
'Cause I'm not feeling anything at all
"Lucy, I'm so sorry. I swear, she came on to me and I was kept trying to push her away but she-"
"It's fine," I cut him off, shaking my head. "Really. I know you wouldn't cheat on me. I trust you." I smile politely.
He stares at me uncomprehendingly. "You're...you're not mad?"
"No. I know you're not at fault."
"You're not...jealous?"
I chuckle. "Should I be? You're not into her, right?"
He looked at me for a long time. "Right."
vi.
And you were wild and crazy
Just so frustrating
"Hey partner," Natsu greeted as he approached the lab table. "What are we blowing up today?"
She looked at him dryly. "Nothing. We are not blowing anything up today, okay? I need money for rent and food, you know."
He laughed and nudged her softly. "Aw, come on, Luce, live a little!"
"I'd like to live with money, please and thank you," she muttered, pulling on her lab goggles and handing Natsu a pair.
Of course, things went wrong, as they always do when it came to Natsu and chemicals.
"Natsu, you idiot!" she wailed. "I'm gonna have to draw my eyebrows on for months! Do you understand how tedious that is? Do you understand?" She gingerly pressed around her forehead, nearly sobbing when she barely felt any eyebrow hair.
"Uh...no?"
Her eye twitched. He noticed and squeaked, running away.
"Natsu Dragneel, get back here so I can—"
vii.
Intoxicating, complicated
Got away by some mistake, and now
"Lucy, you—I can't believe you!"
"Wha—me? You can't believe me? I can't believe you! How could you—"
"Don't blame everything on me! You're at fault too!"
"Like hell I am! God, Natsu, you are so infuriating, I can't even deal with you—"
"Oh, deal with me, huh? Then what are you still doing here? Go on, leave!"
"Fine, I will! God, you need to grow up, Natsu, Jesus Christ—"
"Just go, Lucy! I thought—whatever. Just go."
viii.
But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it's two AM and I'm cursing your name
Lucy screamed and fought back as the attacker yanked at her hair and her purse, trying to rip it from her grasp.
"You bitch—just let go already—fuck!" the man hissed as her heel rammed into his shin.
"Leave"—kick—"me"—kick—"alone!" Lucy slammed her foot up towards his family jewels but he managed to catch her foot between his legs before it hit.
"Nice try," he smirked, renewing his efforts to steal her bag.
"Hey, leave her alone!"
Someone flew into the man and knocked him to the ground, Lucy keeping firm hold of her belongings. Under the dim streetlight, she saw pink hair and realized it was Natsu.
"Natsu!" she called in worry. "Be careful!"
"Don't worry about me, Luce, I got this—ugh!"
"Natsu!"
He flew several feet back and landed on the ground, groaning and rolling on the ground. The mugger got up and dusted himself off, grinning lasciviously at Lucy.
"Looks like your hero's outta commission, girlie," he sneered. "Just gimme the bag and you won't get hurt."
Lucy glared at him darkly, her fury rising at the thought of Natsu being seriously hurt. "You—how dare you—Lucy kick!"
"Argh!"
He fell back and Lucy triumphantly marched over to Natsu, setting down her bag and leaning over him hesitantly, unsure what to do. "Natsu? Natsu, is it bad? Do you—do you need a hospital? Come on, let's go to a hospital."
She struggled to help him up, his body sagging against hers. As she stood, the man-he wasn't knocked out?-darted forward and grabbed her bag off the ground before limping away.
"Hey, give that back!" she yelled. "Shit! Ugh, dammit."
Natsu groaned and immediately she switched back to worry.
"Right, you're more important."
She limped them forward and his head lolled forward and tapped against hers, catching her attention. She turned and found herself breaths away from his face. Her eyes traced his strong features: his slanted eyes, his straight nose, his angled cheeks, his sharp jaw, his parted lips. His normally expressive face was completely smoothed out and he looked more peaceful than she'd ever seen him. A soft smile spread across her lips. She was glad they had become close friends in the past few weeks. He was so much better than her first impression of him.
Her cheeks pinked as her eyes flickered to his lips and she quickly turned away and cleared her throat, dragging them to the side of the road to try to catch a taxi at two AM.
She couldn't help the giggles that burst out of her at the ridiculous situation and wondered why he could get her into so much trouble and she still could never stay mad at him.
ix.
I'm so in love that I acted insane
And that's the way I loved you
Natsu got up slowly, wincing when the bed creaked. His eyes flew to Lucy's slumbering form, sighing in relief when she simply snuggled deeper into the blanket.
They had fallen asleep together again.
She was always to fiercely protective of her personal space and yet she went and did stuff like this. He shook his head in amusement, slipping out from under the covers as quietly as possible.
He tugged on his shoes and grabbed his backpack, watching Lucy as he tiptoed to the door.
Fuck, she's so cute, he thought helplessly as a little smile touched her lips and she sighed happily.
Crash.
"Shit," he hissed as he tripped over her scattered pens and fell into her desk as he tried to dance away from her homework—she would destroy him if he wrinkled them—and his backpack spilled all his books with several loud thumps. He finally caught himself awkwardly against her chair.
Slowly he looked back at Lucy and gasped a little as he watched her stir and sit up, rubbing her eyes blearily.
She blinked and surveyed the mess. He could pinpoint the exact moment she realized what—who—had happened.
He swallowed and prayed for mercy.
"Natsu Dragneel, prepare to be Lucy-kicked into the next century—"
He hadn't lived long, but it was a good way to go.
x.
Breakin' down and comin' undone, it's a
Roller coaster kinda rush, and I
Never knew I could feel that much
"Happy birthday, Luce!"
She gasped at the large present he held out to her and looked up at him. "Natsu! You shouldn't have—I don't need anything—"
"I wanted to." He nudged the box towards her. "Go on, open it!"
He watched nervously as she carefully unwrapped the present and gasped as she realized what it was.
"Natsu!" She stared at him with teary eyes. "This is—this must have been so expensive!"
He shrugged, grinning. "Eh. I don't usually buy anything but food so I gotta lotta money to spend anyway."
She set the star lamp down and threw her arms around his neck tightly. He stumbled back under her weight but caught her and hugged her back just as firmly.
"Thank you so much, Natsu, I love it," she murmured into his neck, breathing in his smoky pine smell.
He buried his nose into her hair. "You told me you always wanted to see space, so..."
"This is the best present ever. Thank you so much, Natsu." She pulled back with a happy smile, beaming at him so brightly he almost thought she was glowing. "Let's try it out!"
They brought the lamp to her room and turned off all the lights, closed all the windows. She tenderly lifted the device from the box and plugged it in, setting in on the ground in the middle of the room and turned it on. She gasped as stars and planets dotted the ceiling and walls and he exhaled a "wow."
"It's beautiful," she breathed.
"Yeah," he agreed, his eyes flitting to starstruck form. He thought she fit in here; she looked like she was home. A sun among stars.
"Hey, Luce?"
"Hmm?" She turned to him with a smile.
He gulped. "We've...we've known each other a while, right?"
She tilted her head and thought about it. "A year and a half, just about. Is that a while?"
"Long enough," he muttered. "Would you believe me if I said I really like you?"
She blushed and shrugged. "I would if you meant it."
"I mean it."
She froze and stared at him, his dark eyes burning into hers. She read sincerity there, and her smile slowly slid from her face. "Natsu?"
"I really like you, Lucy. Really really really. Like, a whole lot. I like you more than anyone else in the world, even though I've only known you a year and a half. Can you believe me?"
A beat, and then she was smiling so widely it almost hurt. "I really really really like you too, Natsu."
Her words entered his brain but he didn't fully process it for another minute. He hadn't expected her to answer-to reciprocate.
He strode forward and gathered her up into his arms, kissing her deeply under the stars. His hands held her face gently, preciously, like she was a treasure he was afraid to break.
She pulled back and gasped for air, but he immediately dragged her back to him for another kiss. Her fingers gripped his shoulders and curled into his shirt, anchoring her there.
"I bet I like you more," he mumbled in between kisses, making her laugh against his lips. His hands slid down her body and settled on her waist.
She cupped his cheeks and slanted her lips firmly against his before replying a little breathlessly, "It's not a competition, Natsu."
He grinned and her heart stuttered. "But if it was, I'd win."
xi.
He stares for another long second before sighing and running his hand through his hair. "Lucy, I don't...I don't think this is working."
I blink at him with a frown. "What are you talking about?"
He sighs again and looks at me seriously. "You don't like me."
"Wha—yes I do—"
"Not as a boyfriend, you don't."
I shut my mouth.
He nods slowly. "Yeah. That's what I thought."
xii.
I'm sorry to him. I'm sorry for leading him on. I'm sorry for pretending I could feel for him even a fraction of what I felt for you.
I'm sorry I compared his perfection to your craziness, his charm to your passion, his planned dates to your thoughtful spontaneity. I'm sorry I wrinkled my nose at his cologne, thinking of smoke and dancing flames, and that I sometimes dreamed in pink—sorry, salmon.
I'm sorry that my heart is still too full of you, that there's no more space inside for anyone else. I'm sorry I couldn't forgive or forget.
I burned everything you gave me except for the star lamp. I couldn't get rid of that—you spent so much money on it. I still sit under the stars in my room sometimes and think of you—of you fighting, and laughing, and running, and grinning, and loving, and happy.
If only your pride—or mine—would learn to compromise.
But that's the way I loved you.
© Copyright 2015 by The Siege
