Gaius ended up employing Leon and two stable hands to help lift Merlin onto a stretcher and move him to his room. Merlin was sweating profusely from the pain every jostle spiked in his side, and by the time they rolled him onto the (flat board he called a) bed he was ready to pass out again.

"I'll get something to lessen the swelling," Gaius gestured to Merlin's torso, and then sternly told him, "don't do a thing till I'm back."

Obviously he meant magic. It was a tone of voice the old man reserved specially for the subject (or maybe it was just because Merlin had been thinking about it that very second). Merlin nodded in a very long-suffering way that made Gaius roll his eyes, and lay on his back in misery, not so much from the current pain of simple breathing but from the likelihood he wouldn't be able to perform a single spell to get rid of it. Thanks to Arthur and Leon being right there to see Gaius examine the extent of his injuries.

(If only Sir Quite-stupid had beat him to an inch of his life and not been caught!...But then he'd have still wanted Merlin's head. Damn.)

"Look, I know it might not be wise - " Merlin started when Gaius reentered with a bucket and cloth.

"Might not be wise? Do you hear yourself, Merlin?" Gaius huffed, dragging a stool next to the bed and handing him a cup of water to drink. "The second Arthur sees you tomorrow, smiling and happy as a harem, he'll know something's wrong."

Merlin choked on his water. "As a harem? Gaius, I don't think you -"

"Point is, your injuries cannot magically disappear no matter how much you might want them to or are able to make them be," he said crossly, and lifted Merlin's shirt without warning to press the very-cold, wet cloth against his damaged skin. Merlin jumped.

"Fine fine, yes, I'm well aware," he grumbled (though the coolness of the cloth felt divine). "I don't mean to fix anything the easy route. I think you're forgetting I'm shite at healing spells anyway, Gaius. But, what I could do -"

"Out of the question."

Merlin's jaw dropped. "You haven't even heard what it is!" he protested, but Gaius shook his head dismissively.

"Merlin, just because there are many things you could do does not mean there is even a single thing you should do."

Merlin frowned at him. "I don't think I follow."

The old man heaved a put-upon sigh. "You want me to cover for you by saying I've concocted some miracle pain-dissolving serum that would allow you to enter the sparring match and be able to at least hold your sword," he said, as if he could read Merlin's bloody mind (which sorcerers can't, Merlin's looked for the spell to try on Arthur). "And that's all well and good, Merlin - except for one thing."

"And what's that?" Merlin asked, frustrated beyond the point of words that his mentor insisted on being such a know-it-all. (Really, with Arthur added to the mix, Merlin was surrounded by them.)

"Magical healing is different from other magic, I hope you remember. The act cannot be undone."

"Yes, yes, I know all that, but-"

"No buts, Merlin. I fear if you were to cast that powerful a spell on yourself, to not feel pain, you wouldn't any longer. Permanently."

At first, Merlin stared at Gaius blankly, not getting the problem. In fact, with the way his life had been going the past two years, not feeling pain sounded like it would answer a lot of his problems. At the least it would make protecting Arthur easier (plus no pain when the same gave him a cuff to the head).

Of course the (often suppressed) logical side of him knew that would be no good in the long end. He'd get impaled by a bandit whilst saving Arthur's behind and not even notice till he keeled over dead. "All right then. What do you suggest we do?"

"You will wear as much armor as you possibly can without collapsing, and stay out of Arthur's way," Gaius said without much ado, patting Merlin on the shoulder and rewetting the cloth.

"And what if I do need to use ma-AAAHHH."

Merlin yelped at the once-again cold cloth Gaius pressed on his injuries. "No more talk," Gaius told him crossly, "You'll make it worse."

And with that Merlin was forced to stay miserably in his bed for the rest of the day.

Or at least, that was what he feared until the foreboding feeling that came upon him that evening at Arthur opening the door, carrying in two swords and an armful of armor that he immediately let clatter to the floor (the lazy sod).

Staying miserable in his bed for the rest of the day suddenly didn't sound so bad.

"You're joking," he said, before Arthur could even say anything, but the prince barely blinked.

"I'm not," he answered. "You're an even bigger idiot than I feared if you think you're going to walk into a duel without any training."

Merlin glared at him in disbelief. "Arthur, I can't hardly breathe, much less move."

"Well you're going to have to move tomorrow at dawn. Might as well get used to it now. Come on now, up up up! What is it you always say?" Arthur cocked his head as if in deep thought (like that had ever happened before) and picked up a helm and gauntlet from the armor littered on the floor. Merlin gave him a look he hoped communicated 'Don't you dare,' but Arthur paid him no heed before creating the worst racket on earth, clanging the gauntlet against the helm without reserve.

"LET'S HAVE YOU LAZY DAISY!" he yelled above the intolerable noise.

That was it. Merlin got his arms beneath him and managed to lift himself to a sitting position at least, though it hurt probably as bad as all of Sir Quite-stupid's beating would at once. And Arthur was grinning at him for it, the clotpole, still banging the metal together like an invalid.

"You have no respect for armour!" Merlin yelled at him above it, trying to get to his unsteady feet without feeling like his middle was being stabbed at the movement. When he finally managed that (and his entire head started ringing from the horrible sound) he grabbed at Arthur's hands half-way between the next clang, ripping the two pieces out of his grip. Arthur put his hands on his hips with a rather smug grin.

"Told you you could do it," he grinned, and Merlin scowled at him.

"No, you did not," he growled at him, and then stared despairingly at the helm in his right hand. "And do you have any idea how long it takes to undent armor? How will I even get this on my head?"

Arthur's smile faltered for a second (served him right), though he quickly shrugged in nonchalance like the over-privileged prat he was. "There are plenty of helmets to spare. Now stand still and let me put the rest of this on you."

"I shouldn't be surprised you expect me to get down to the training grounds in this condition. But in full armor? That's got to be past even your suspension of belief."

"Of course, Merlin," Arthur said, and picked up one of the swords from the floor. "Which is why we're training in here." He gestured down to the other sword near Merlin's feet, adding, "Now pick up your sword."

"You're joking."

"Merlin, do I look like I'm joking?"

Merlin stared down at the weapon, the ground never looking farther than it did now. Bending down like that, with his back in this state, might mean not getting back up (and wouldn't that be its own kind of mercy). But, of course, a small part of his brain devoted to rationality knew this was essential. If he was disarmed and couldn't grab his sword from the ground, he was little better off than if Sir Quite-stupid had gotten his head on a platter in the first place.

So Merlin reached down and took the sword from the ground. It was a careful thing, though he tried to be as quick as he could, using his knees more than his back.

It still hurt like hell.

But he came back up, which was all that Merlin had been hoping for, and he looked up to grin at Arthur in triumph. "Okay, maybe that wasn't so ba-"

The prince didn't let him finish. In one swift movement he disarmed Merlin, the grip of the sword twisting out his hand. The sword clattered back to the ground.

"What on earth was that supposed to accomplish?" he yelled at Arthur, who didn't so much as blink.

"Pick it up again," Arthur gestured to it with his own blade, otherwise not responding.

Merlin gritted his teeth, carefully doing so. He waited in anticipation for Arthur to play his trick again, but the prince merely nodded, leaning his sword against the wall before coming closer.

"Show me where your hand is on the grip," he said, nodding this time at Merlin's sword, who raised it to show him. Arthur immediately started shaking his head as he inspected, tapping Merlin's fingers gripped around it. "This is why I could disarm you so easily. See? You're holding the grip like you're shaking a man's hand. And it's much too close to the pommel; you're not going to have good balance like that. Here."

Arthur maneuvered Merlin's hand accordingly, sliding it up to rest quite close to the guard. "But won't my fingers be more likely to get sliced off?" Merlin asked dubiously, and Arthur rolled his eyes.

"Not if you've got your fingers in the right position. Squeeze your forefinger and your thumb together, like this, into a tight ring. That will both improve your grip and keep your thumb tucked away. And really, Merlin, you're in no position to be holding a sword one-handed. The grip is long enough for two hands. There."

Arthur stepped back, evaluating with scrutinous eyes that made Merlin nervous. "Your grip is better now, but your stance is still terrible. Worse than a squire's."

"Is that supposed to surprise me?" Merlin grumbled, though he immediately shifted into what he thought was more of a fighting position. His back was already on fire from the weight of the sword.

Arthur burst out laughing. "Now . . . oh, now, now you look like Sir Kytstulbet!"

Merlin shifted out of the stance, though he couldn't help but grin as well. Arthur eventually quieted down, still smiling. "Alright, let's just work on the middle guard. That will protect your injuries enough if the dolt ever gets close enough-which is doubtful if I have anything to do with it."

By the time the sun set Merlin had been fully dressed in armor, learned two other guards, and managed to block at least a few of Arthur's blows (though they still rung down from his arm, shaking his entire body it felt like). When Arthur tried twisting their blades against Merlin's grip it kept firm enough that he didn't lose his sword.

As the evening wore on, however, Arthur acted more and more serious. Grim, almost - as if despite all this, the odds were stacked against them. "It'll all be fine," Merlin told him when they'd finished, the prince coming back with a pitcher of water.

Arthur didn't pause to look at him. "Of course it will be, I'll make sure of it," he said briskly, pouring the pitcher into a cup he raised to his lips. His brow was still furrowed, though.

"So what was the point of all this then?" Merlin cocked an eyebrow, unaffected when Arthur lowered his cup to glare at him.

"The point was to cover all ends, of course. To make sure, to the best of my ability," he said, and filled another cup he gave to Merlin.

"To make sure what?" Merlin frowned as he took it, and Arthur let out a frustrated breath.

"That you live, you idiot. What, you think I wish you dead? Honestly Merlin, sometimes your skull is so thick I'd be surprised you even need a helmet!" His voice escalated in volume to the point of fury, startling Merlin into silence.

Arthur then shook his head, moving to unstrap the armor from Merlin's chest (it was very very strange, this role reversal). "Not like this won't be good to know for the future, either," he said in a much more subdued voice.

"Yeah, I actually learned something for once. Usually I'm just your fighting dummy," Merlin grinned.

Arthur's lips finally quirked into a half-smile. "Hmm. Actually, in that respect I'd say not much has changed at all."

(Cue Merlin shoving Arthur, Arthur pulling him into a head-lock with a triumphant "HA!," Merlin's laughter and consequently all the fun cut short as it turned into gasps of pain thanks to his injuries. If you follow.)


A/N: The lazy daisy scene didn't happen in the first two seasons, but that doesn't mean Merlin hasn't called him that before he does in canon! At least in my opinion. Thanks for your continued support everyone! There should be two more chapters after this.

D. Rose: All I will say about this is what great comments and insightful thoughts. Seriously, I entirely agree, and I hope you enjoy the the conclusion of this story :) Thanks for reviewing!