CHIHAYA

I was so excited about how Arata's visualization technique totally worked against Yamai-kun. I bolted down lunch and found my way to a quiet spot at the bottom of the stairwell. Pulling my phone from my pocket, I stared at his number.

I wanted to call him. Badly. I wanted to share this victory with him. Tell him how it freed me to imagine playing him in those circumstances.

But I suddenly felt diffident.

To admit I was holding that memory so dear… Would he hear too much in my voice?

True, he'd mentioned it to me first. And that meant a lot, that he still treasured those times just as I did.

I laid the phone against my heart, staring out the window at the clouds chasing one another.

And yet, the way he said it, so matter-of-factly, it may have just represented a carefree game in his youth. A game with a friend.

For me that memory embodied all the passion I'd poured into karuta ever since those days, passion driving me toward one ambition: to be the best, because he was going to be the best.

I want to make him proud. I want to make him happy. I want to make him long to play me the way I...

Aaaagh! I snapped the phone shut.

Well, now I was feeling way too tangled up to make the call, for sure. I slid the phone back into the pocket of my shorts and turned to trudge up the stairs.

The afternoon activities brought more torment for my unsettled emotions.

"Raise your hand if you've ever played a match against the Queen." Coach Sakurazawa had us all seated in her standard lecture format, but this time a large flat screen TV dominated the desk beside her.

I raised my hand and looked around. Oh! Mine was the only one in the air.

"Ayase-san. What were your observations?"

"She's fast. Very fast!" Most students nodded. A few rolled their eyes. "But she's always perfectly precise. She doesn't waste motion—her body and then her hand go straight to the card like it's connected to her." Think of it as making one hundred new friends, I heard Dr. Harada say in my memory.

Friends, huh? Is that how Shinobu-chan sees the cards? Why she's so attached to them?

Coach S was nodding, waiting for me to go on.

"And she's left-handed, which makes a big difference in how you defend against her if you're used to right-handed opponents." Beside me, I heard Taichi sigh. He'd heard that dissertation from me before.

"True. Anything else?"

I wracked my brain. "We didn't have a very good contest last time because of my injury, but I know I still have to get faster to have a chance against her."

"All right," Coach S said, dismissing me. "The rest of you will have an opportunity to make observations in a minute when we watch the recording."

The recording? Did she mean…

"So who has played Wataya-kun?"

I started. We're going to watch their match? All of us together? And pick them apart, piece by piece… My gut twisted.

I saw Manata and Emuro raise their hands. I glanced at Taichi. He was looking at me as well. I gave him a slight shake of my head.

Don't do it. Don't… don't betray our friendship.

His eyes returned to the front, but he made no move to raise his hand or his voice. I exhaled in relief.

It was probably unfair. I wanted their knowledge so that I could be more competitive with him, but I didn't actually want to help any of them beat him.

And it felt wrong to talk about my knowledge of him. It felt like I was sharing his secrets, or –I don't know—exposing his weakness. And I just couldn't bring myself to do that.

I tuned in to hear Emuro talking about how Arata was very confident in moving cards and how he chose to do so at the right time to break his opponent's momentum.

"Yeah," Manata agreed. "And he could change directions like lightning, as each new syllable was read."

"It didn't seem to bother him when I won a card from him," Emuro added.

"I know," Manata agreed, scrubbing both hands against his face. "It was weird. No matter what was happening, it was like he was on another level. Like he didn't even think about the match or what was at stake if he won or lost."

A smile crept over my lips. His secret. I knew it. And I was a part of it.

Taichi looked my way, raising his eyebrows in question.

I just shrugged. It was our secret—Arata's and mine.

Coach Sakurazawa's voice broke over us. "All right, then, let's take a look at the DVD…."

-0-0-0-0-

Over the next couple hours we watched the recording I'd already seen at least ten times. Coach S paused now and then to direct our attention to something that had just happened or was about to happen, and it did give me some things to think about. When we broke for individual matches, she pitted me against Emuro-kun, who kind of gave me the creeps. He seemed uninterested in our match but he was strong and quick and had lots of weapons at his disposal. My game sense gave me a slight edge, but I was physically and mentally more fatigued than usual from using my left hand. He pulled off the win. I collapsed into sleep.

"Oi, Chihayaaaa." I became aware that someone was shaking me back and forth. I licked my lips as I sat up and met a pair of gold-flecked eyes.

Taichi's mouth, which had been set in a stern line, quirked into an amused grin. He lifted my bangs with one hand and brushed a thumb over my forehead. "It's a perfect pattern."

Huh? Oh, the tatami wrinkles.

He continued to smooth a few stray hairs into place. Still sleepy, I watched his thick eyelashes dance as his eyes followed the work of his hand. I was still staring when his gaze returned to mine. Our eyes held until I grew uncomfortable and pushed off the ground.

We caught up to the twins and Ichimura in the dinner line. "How's your hand, Ayase-san?" Kanata asked kindly.

I shrugged. "Okay, I guess." In truth, it was killing me. I thought of Taichi's gentle treatment of my hand last night. I wonder if can ask him later to… For some reason the thought brought heat to my cheeks.

"…so after the Master Qualifiers we'll be tied up with cram school," Manata was saying. Kanata's girlfriend had joined us; she looked dejected at this pronouncement.

I took a tray and followed her.

"Unless one of us wins," Kanata grinned. "Then Mom will have to let us practice."

"Impossible," Ichimura declared, balancing his tray in one hand and waving the other dramatically. "Since I will also be competing, you would have to defeat me in order to win." His mock bravado generated an outcry from the twins and laughter from those around us. I noticed Taichi didn't join in their banter, though.

I cast a glance at him. He was walking next to them, carrying his tray to one of the tables, but his face was unconcerned, not bothered by their predictions. Perhaps, like me, he knew their hopes were futile. They would never defeat Arata.

But then again, Arata would compete in the Western Qualifiers, wouldn't he? I suppose they have a chance in the East then, but Tsuboguchi-san or Sudo-san or… wait a minute!

I nearly dropped my laden tray onto the table before me. The dishes clanked noisily.

"Are you okay?" Kanata's girlfriend was eyeing me with concern. I'm sure the shock was written all over my face.

I tried to recover myself and answered her, "Fine. I'm fine." Taichi's worried gaze found me from further down the table. It's that I only just realized you will be competing in the East this year, I wanted to tell him. And if you win, you'll play Arata.

His golden eyes looked puzzled now, and he raised his brows in silent question. I shrugged and mustered a shaky smile before resolutely turning my attention to my tray and taking a seat.

I tuned back in to the general conversation. "No, not cram school," Ichimura was saying, "but I will have to spend a lot more time studying for entrance exams."

Taichi asked, "So you're all planning to go to college next year? What will you study?"

Ichimura began talking about his interest in programming and video games and my mind wandered again.

The Empress got after me once or twice a year to fill out my career survey, but I'd never actually asked my friends what their plans were. Desktomu and Taichi were smart enough to get into a good university probably, but what would they want to study? And sweet Kana-chan…would she put her knowledge of classical poetry to work? But how? Or would she end up selling kimonos in her family's store?

How could I have been so self-centered all this time? All I ever thought of was how I wanted to be Queen; everything else was just background noise to me.

I had a flash of memory. "I was determined to become Queen before I finished college… You remind me of myself at your age."

Hmmm.

-0-0-0-0-

TAICHI

Since it was the last day, Coach Sakurazawa squeezed in two more matches after dinner. I won the first against a Class B second year and lost the second in a rematch against Emuro. I had to admit I didn't have the stamina he'd built up. I'd have to work on that… add more exercise to our daily regimen and attend more tournaments.

Next to me, Chihaya also was in a rematch…against Yama-chan. I don't know if she did it on purpose, but the coach decided to use a CD for the reading of this particular round. Yama-chan was more accurate than before, whether from the two days of practice or from the CD or both, and she was relentless against Chihaya.

For her part, Chihaya was intense but composed. I could see her lips moving as she reviewed the remaining cards. I was surprised when she took the winning card on "Would I." Did she actually remember that "Would the" had already been read?!

"Thank you for the match," the girls chorused as they bowed. Yama-chan didn't blink an eye when Chihaya slumped to the floor instead of rising from her bow. She caught my eye, pointedly glancing down at Chihaya and back again with a fond smile.

I chuckled, silently agreeing with her. A couple matches still dragged on and I alternated between trying to see what was happening and looking over at Yama-chan. A few times our eyes met, but we just stared for a minute, too tired to be embarrassed. Her big amber eyes were soft and pulled at me. I'd be sorry not to see them tomorrow.

"Thank you for the match," I heard at last. Coach Sakurazawa issued final instructions in her usual curt manner and concluded with a reminder of when her club would meet next. As he had earlier, Emuro wandered off leaving me to put away the cards. Yama-chan was collecting theirs. Now that we were free to talk, I wasn't sure what to say.

"Here, I'll take yours," she offered, extending one hand for my box. "I know it's late and you have to get back."

"Oh, thanks," I said. I started to accept her offer but felt reluctant. It seemed wrong to part ways so abruptly. "I've got it, though. Let's go together." She nodded.

Of all the people here, I'd connected with her the most. I felt like we could be good friends if we weren't in separate schools.

"We had a lot of fun this weekend," I told her. "Thanks for helping us out."

We wove between a couple groups of students before she said, "I'm afraid I wasn't very welcoming at first. I'm sorry. Both you and Ayase-san had just beaten me at the tournament. I wasn't happy to suddenly see you again." She gave me a sheepish smile.

"That's understandable," I assured her.

"But you're actually really nice," she said, avoiding eye contact as she placed her box next to mine on the shelf.

I chuckled self-consciously. "Thanks. So are you." We dawdled in front of the shelves. "I know these guys give you a hard time sometimes." I held her amber eyes with mine. "Don't let them get to you. You'll be a good captain."

She sighed heavily, looking over the room. "It must be fun to be in your club," she said wistfully.

"Yeah," I admitted. "Chihaya's kind of a slave driver, but you'd fit right in, for sure." I chuckled again. "Actually, you might be a little too normal for our crew."

She chuckled too, shaking her head. "Like I said, it sounds fun." Her smile dropped and she suddenly looked nervous. "Would you mind… er could we… never mind."

"What?" I looked at her with concern.

"Nothing," she said, her cheeks coloring a becoming pink. "I just thought it would be nice to… to exchange email addresses," she said in a rush. "In case we are at the same tournament or something." She trailed off nervously.

"Yeah," I said, infusing my voice with extra enthusiasm to put her at ease. "That's a good idea. Here…" I pulled my phone from my pocket, flipping it open.

She did the same and our phones chirped in acceptance. I snapped mine closed again and said, "Well, we really should get going."

"Oh, yes, of course." She forced a smile, but it looked a little dismal. "Well, goodbye then." Her hands wrapped around her phone, holding it tight.

I returned her smile. "Bye." Turning back to the room at large I spotted Chihaya talking with Coach Sakurazawa. I joined her in extending our thanks, and we left for the station.

We made the trek through the sultry evening in silence. I was preoccupied with thinking about Rion and how easy it was to hang out with her and how, even though she was really talented, she didn't seem to fit in with the whole Fujisaki powerhouse club mentality.

"Taichi," Chihaya interrupted my thoughts. I realized we were already on the platform and I'd missed the entire walk here. "Have you thought about the fact that you might play Arata this fall?"

I settled into a window seat and Chihaya followed. "I guess it's possible."

"Definitely! Now that you're Class A you could win the Eastern Qualifiers and face him in the playoffs."

I grunted. There were a lot of experienced challengers I had yet to beat in a match; Dr. Harada and Tsuboguchi and the Hokuo guys were just a few that came to mind.

Chihaya squirmed and made a noise of frustration. "I'll be so jealous if you get to play him before I do!"

Jealous. Hmph. What does she know about jealousy anyway? I could write a book on it.

I noticed her absently rubbing her right hand with her left. With forced courage I took her hand in both of mine and began unwrapping the gauze and tape, carefully unwinding it from around her hand and fingers. She seemed to go very still.

Everything in me screamed to smooth over the awkwardness by directing the conversation toward neutral territory…to talk about the club or about plans for the rest of summer break….

But I knew this was my last opportunity on this trip, my last chance to remind her that we weren't just teammates or good friends but a guy and a girl who could have a future together. Beginning with her thumb pad, I gently massaged each tiny muscle.

It felt so right to claim her hand like this. Why wasn't she mine already?

I looked up and met her eyes. My heart began to pound.

I was opening my mouth to say it… something that would change everything… when she chimed in. "We should enter you in as many tournaments as we can this fall. We need to make sure you get all the experience you can in Class A before the Qualifiers."

She's still thinking about him…about me being ready to play against him.

"Yeah," I said without enthusiasm. "We'll see." I returned my attention to our hands, numbly continuing my work.

An odd thought occurred to me. If I did beat him, would she finally look at me? Look at me the way she looks at him?