Chapter 2

The seat creaked a bit as Teal'c stirred, rousing himself from his meditations. He could not understand why, with all the resources available to the Tau'ri, they insisted on placing so many seats in a single aircraft. At least half of them were empty on this flight, the closet passengers to him and O'Neill several rows back.

"Did ya have a nice nap?" O'Neill asked.

Teal'c quirked an eyebrow at him. They were both warriors, and Teal'c usually had no difficulty understanding O'Neill's motivations or thought processes, but his manner of speaking and sense of humor were still difficult for him to comprehend at times. He was learning, though. "I was not napping, O'Neill. I was meditating."

"I know that, Teal'c. Here," he said, tossing a small, silvery packet to Teal'c. "I didn't want you to miss out on the peanuts."

Peanuts? He had encountered peanut butter and found its taste quite pleasing. These "peanuts" must be the source of peanut butter. He watched as O'Neill tore open his package and pulled out some of the contents. He followed the example and found that the nuts were salty and did not have as strong a flavor as peanut butter, but they were still quite satisfying. He wondered if they had an unusually high nutritional value since there were so few of them in the package. "I have been contemplating our reasons for making this trip, O'Neill. I have spoken with Daniel Jackson concerning your people's beliefs on life after death, but he could not give me a definitive answer."

"Whoa. OK, switch gears. That's a heavy topic, Teal'c."

O'Neill had explained "switching gears" to him before, both in terms of driving a car and in terms of changing the subject of a conversation. He was unsure as to what O'Neill meant by calling the topic "heavy," though. The dictionary Daniel Jackson had given him had several definitions for that word as he recalled. O'Neill always assumed that Teal'c knew what he meant, however, so Teal'c would have to ask if he wanted an explanation. "Heavy?"

O'Neill turned to look at him. Sometimes Teal'c felt that his commander actually forgot that he was an alien. "Yeah, heavy. Serious. Requiring deep thought. Heavy."

"Oh. I see. On Chulak, we would call this a light topic." At least, he hoped he was translating the word properly. "Light" had as many as if not more definitions than "heavy." "A thing of the mind," he added, noting that O'Neill seemed to be amused by his explanation. He failed to see where the humor was. "Without substance. To be accepted and not questioned. We were taught that Apophis would watch over us in this life and protect us in the next. But now I know there is no truth in that belief."

"So you're doing a little soul searching? Picking the next bandwagon to jump on?"

"Is this bandwagon some kind of conveyance for religious processions?" Truly, O'Neill could be so cryptic at times that Teal'c often believed he was speaking another language altogether.

O'Neill sat up a bit straighter in his seat and frowned a little. Good. This meant that he was willing to speak plainly for at least a few moments. "Sorry. Never mind the bandwagon comment. I'm just a little cynical when it comes to organized religion. Look, Daniel really is the expert in that department. I know he tends to lecture, and he probably gave you a lot more information than you really wanted. You just have to be very specific when you ask him a question. Maybe you should try asking him what he personally thinks."

This had not occurred to Teal'c. Daniel Jackson was his friend. "Do you not think he would be insulted by such a question? On Chulak, we are taught not to question matters of faith."

"Huh. The people here are just about completely the opposite. Well, some of us are. We ask questions every chance we get. And we're not usually so worried about insulting others. In fact, I think sometimes you have to insult someone to really get to know them. And sometimes it's just calling it like it is. No bullshit. Just straightforward, on-the-level, no-nonsense, this is how it is."

"Is this then why you refused to accompany Daniel Jackson to Egypt?"

O'Neill stared at Teal'c for a long moment. Teal'c was beginning to wonder if he had insulted his friend, but he had just been told that these kinds of insults were sometimes desirable. "No," O'Neill finally offered, although his tone of voice did little to convince Teal'c that he was sure of his answer. "That was more of a knee-jerk reaction, I think." Teal'c looked down at O'Neill's knee. He had never witnessed this knee jerking, other than when Dr. Frasier tested O'Neill's reflexes. Maybe it had something to do with the colonel's "bad knees."

"Oh, for crying out loud, Teal'c. It's a figure of speech. Why do you have to take everything so literally? Look, I'm not really sure why I said I wouldn't go. I guess I was just trying to thumb my nose – sorry – have revenge on Apophis, but this really has nothing to do with him. It's really hard for me to keep this whole host/Goa'uld thing separated."

O'Neill was silent for a moment, leaving Teal'c wondering if his friend also had difficulty remembering that the infant Goa'uld he carried both was and was not a part of himself. But his Goa'uld did not control his actions and did not speak with his voice, so more than likely, O'Neill did not consider the Goa'uld to be anything other than an unwelcome guest, if he thought about it at all. He certainly seemed to be disturbed by reminders and turned away whenever the Jaffa's pouch or its occupant were visible. In some ways, Teal'c could understand O'Neill's feelings on the subject.

"Bottom line, Teal'c, is that we're part of a team. Just because I think Daniel is nuts doesn't mean that I shouldn't be there to back him up. And he did make a promise."

Teal'c nodded solemnly. Loyalty and keeping promises were concepts he had no problem understanding. He was still confused about one thing, though, and perhaps a little concerned. He held up the empty silver bag. "I have heard Captain Carter say that one is what one eats. Is this what has made Daniel Jackson 'nuts'?"

O'Neill simply laughed, and Teal'c couldn't completely hide the smile that was tugging at the corners of his own mouth.


"Wakey, wakey. Rise and shine!" Jack wrinkled his nose. This place was a dump. And Daniel looked like hell. Obviously, there had been very little sleeping going on last night, and what there was of it had been disturbed. The bed was a rumpled mess with Daniel sprawled on his stomach in the middle of it, the sheet tangled around his legs and one pillow clutched to his chest. And he was drooling. Nice.

He was tempted just to let the poor guy sleep for a little while longer, but they needed to finish what they came here for and get their butts back to Colorado. General Hammond had said he couldn't give his permission for Teal'c to leave the country, so Jack hadn't asked. It had been quite a feat to pull all the strings necessary to smuggle an "illegal alien" out of the country without the general getting wind of it. George was no fool, though. He knew exactly what Jack was up to and was willing to turn a blind eye as long as nobody got caught with their pants down. That meant SG-1 reporting bright and early the day after tomorrow for their next mission briefing. A few days leave for the whole team might be noticed, but it certainly wasn't unheard of. The pace they kept simply couldn't be maintained indefinitely. More than a little midnight oil had been burned by all four of them, especially lately. Jack made a note to himself to make sure they all got some real leave soon. Just not right now.

"C'mon, Danny boy. Time to wake up." Jack reached out and shook Daniel's shoulder. Geez, the guy could probably sleep through a bomb detonating outside of his window once he got to ripping the z's. No, Daniel would never be a soldier. Not to mention that Jack would've been sleeping with his gun clutched to his chest rather than a pillow in a place like this. The clown at the front desk had not only coughed up Daniel's room number, but a spare key as well. And all it took was a crisp, new twenty and a glare from Teal'c. Jack considered not for the first time having that glare registered as a strategic weapon.

Daniel groaned and mashed his face further into the pillow. OK, there's some progress. He actually moved. Jack shook him again, trying to gain ground while he had the advantage. Daniel finally flopped over onto his back, scrubbing a hand over his face and blinking furiously.

"Aha! It's alive!" Jack was victorious.

"Jack?" Daniel fumbled for his glasses and slipped them onto his face as he sat up.

"Last time I checked. Here." Jack waved a cup of steaming black coffee under Daniel's nose. The guy was basically useless before he got some caffeine into him, so Jack had planned ahead.

Daniel sat up and took the offered cup, wrapping his hands around it and blowing gently on the surface before taking a sip. "Thanks."

Jack rolled his eyes. "'Thanks,' he says. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to find a good cup of coffee in a neighborhood like this? There isn't exactly a Starbuck's on every corner." Jack had been there when Daniel had told Sam about the great little hotel he'd made reservations at. Obviously, things had gone downhill since the last time Daniel was here.

OK, the caffeine seemed to be kicking in now. Daniel was looking marginally more alert, at least enough to peer at Jack with a look that said, "What the hell are you doing here?", which is exactly what he said, followed by, "I thought you had to finish that report on new team selection."

Jack winced. It was an excuse he had thrown onto the end of his refusal to go to Egypt to waste his time burying a stupid hunk of prehistoric junk. Daniel was obviously still pissed about it, and rightly so. "Oh. That." Jack tried to make light of it, even as he was mentally kicking himself and telling himself that he really should be apologizing. Oh, well. In for a penny, in for a pound. "I pretty much already knew what recommendations I was going to make. I just had to put it down on paper. Borrowed a laptop and did it on the flight on the way over."

"You? Borrowed a computer?"

Jack could tell it was meant as an insult, but it didn't quite come out that way. The grudges that Daniel held onto were few and far between, and apparently, he had decided not to make this one of them. "Well, geez, don't sound so surprised. You'd think I'd never touched one before. I even showed Teal'c how to play Solitaire." Jack was really warming up now and gestured towards Teal'c, who was standing by the door – on guard, Jack realized. Ever the vigilant soldier. And Daniel, ever the oblivious scholar, not only had his back turned to the Jaffa, but also apparently had no idea that he was there until Jack pointed him out. Daniel almost spilled the precious cup of coffee as he twisted his head around to take a look over his shoulder.

"Teal'c! I, uh, oh – " Coffee sloshed over his hand as he stood up, and he quickly set the cup down on the nightstand and wiped his hand on his shirt. "I thought General Hammond didn't want you to leave the country."

"He does not know where I have gone. He believes that I have," Teal'c paused and looked at Jack, "gone fishing."

Daniel just stood there, looking back and forth from Jack to Teal'c. Jack had to wipe a smile off his face as Daniel turned back towards him and said, "You told me I was crazy if I thought this was going to make a difference." The statement was half accusation, half question. OK, so he wasn't quite ready to let go of it yet.

Jack thought it was beating a dead horse, but Daniel was the kind that wanted explanations. He could do that, but he wasn't about to get all wishy-washy about it. "I do think you're crazy, but it doesn't matter what I think. This isn't about me."

"No, it's not."

Silence again, but it wasn't angry silence this time. Not quite. "Daniel, I'm sorry." There. He'd said it. "Look, you know me. I don't have much patience with all this spiritual mumbo jumbo, but I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I'm sorry."

Daniel still didn't say anything, and Jack was beginning to wonder if he was just flat-out wrong about the grudge. Finally, with a perfectly straight face, Daniel said, "What have you done with my friend?"

"Huh?" What on earth was the kid talking about?

"You're obviously an imposter. You said, 'I'm sorry,' twice in less than thirty seconds. You couldn't possibly be Jack O'Neill."

Jack just stood there, stunned, until Daniel finally cracked a smile. A joke! It was a joke. A rather sarcastic one, but he had to admit that it hit dead center. "Ouch. Bull's eye!"

Teal'c took the opportunity to chime in with one of his "stranger in a strange land" questions. "Does this have anything to do with the bullshit you were telling me about earlier?"

Jack couldn't help but bust out laughing then, and he was glad to see Daniel joining in. "Jack, what have you been teaching him?"

"None of your business. We were just shootin' the shit." He couldn't resist. Teal'c frowned, setting both Jack and Daniel off again. Jack had to wonder how much of that stoic façade was just an act. He couldn't really still be that baffled by Earth humor, could he? But wait a minute. Someone was missing out on all this. "Hey, where's Carter?"

Daniel pointed at a closed door in the wall perpendicular to the window. This threw Jack completely off-balance. "She's in – your bathroom?" Had he blundered into something here that he really didn't want to know about?

"No, the bathroom's down the hall." Daniel stopped laughing and started to turn red, which worried Jack all the more. "She has an adjoining room. You didn't think we were – sharing a room, did you?"

That was exactly what he had thought for about a split second, but he wasn't about to admit that. Not going there. "Well, of course not! I was just kidding. Maybe we should go and wake her up, huh?" All right, Jack, time to shut your mouth and go for some diversionary tactics.

As he was reaching for the doorknob, though, the door swung open and almost smacked him in the face. A startled Captain Carter took a step back, her posture instantly defensive, then relaxing as she saw who it was. "Colonel! Teal'c! How did you get here?"

"We flew in an airplane," Teal'c said. Completely straight-faced. Not a hint of a smile. Very deliberate.

Jack decided to call his bluff. He wagged a finger at Teal'c. "That's funny."

"It is a statement of fact, O'Neill. I fail to see how it could be humorous."

"You're doing that on purpose, aren't you?"

"What am I doing?"

"Pulling my leg."

Teal'c looked down at Jack's leg. "I have not touched you."

Daniel laughed. So did Carter, but she tried to suppress it when Jack glared at her. Teal'c, however, remained the perfect straight man. Jack wasn't about to comment on that, though. Then he'd have to explain the term to Teal'c when he had a sneaking suspicion he already knew exactly what it meant.