---- Chapter 19
"Mommy. Mommy, wake up."
Lois stirred, rubbing a hand across her eyes. She found herself alone in bed, with Jordan pulling on her arm. She turned her head and looked at the clock, finding it to be just before 2am. She looked back to Jordan, whose eyes were wide open.
"What's wrong, Jordan?"
"I can't sleep."
She had become well aware of that as she sat up and rubbed the sleep out of her eyes, one at a time. She figured she'd gone through numerous nights like this before, but once again found herself wishing she had all her former knowledge, or at least the late nights with Jordan, to draw upon so she could get her back to sleep.
Scooting back, she sat against the bed's headboard and pulled Jordan back with her, setting her on her lap and cradled in her arms. "Why can't you sleep?"
"The closet."
Despite having just been woken, Lois smiled a bit. The closet had been her nemesis as well when she was Jordan's age. "The closet, huh? What's it doing?"
Jordan wriggled deeper into her a bit, wrapping her arms around her. "It's making noises. There's something in it."
Lois hugged Jordan a little tighter, hoping to calm her fears a bit. She didn't remember it well, ironically enough, but she could venture a guess as to what Jordan was feeling. She hated that her baby girl was afraid. She wanted what had worked for her when she was young would work for Jordan. Hopefully she'd believe in special water just as much as she had.
"When I was your age, baby girl, and even a little older, I thought things in my closet wanted to get me. It was a regular closet during the day, but when I was sleeping it just didn't like me at all. I used to run to my mommy, just like you, and she'd hold me just like this. She kept me safe, just like I will always keep you safe.
"But she also had a secret way to make the closet safe so I could go back to sleep. This is a family secret, so you can't tell anybody, ok? Not until you have a little girl or boy of your own once you're married."
Jordan nodded against her chest, and Lois continued. "When there's something in the closet and it wants to get you, you have to make some special water to scare them away. They hate the special water, because it hurts them."
"What do we put in it?"
"Well, you take water and you add a few things in. Some salt, a little milk, a little basil, hot sauce and lemon. You mix it all together and then splash some into the closet with your hands. The things are hurt by the juice and when you touch the water, a little bit of your essence sticks to it and will keep anything scary it touches away forever."
Lois looked down at Jordan and found that she'd fallen asleep in the thirty seconds she'd just spoken, using her chest as a pillow. Thankful that she'd been spared having to make the special water that her mom had always made when she was little, she shifted Jordan to a position where she could carry her more easily. She got off the bed and carried Jordan back to her room, placing her down on the bed softly and giving her a quick peck on the forehead.
Walking back to the bedroom, Lois stopped and grabbed a glass of water to take with her. She wondered where Clark had been needed as she plodded back to bed, sipping at her water and yawning. She laid down, pulling the covers tight under her chin.
An hour later, she groaned and sat up, utterly defeated. She could not get back to sleep, no matter what she did. Counting sheep made her think about cotton which would lead her to thinking about the civil war for some reason, warm milk made her nauseous, and simply willing herself to sleep had no effect on her current state of wakefulness. She gave up and got out of bed, walking towards the door but her reflection stopped her. Not getting enough sleep was WAY more evident now.
She kicked the dresser, since it was obviously at fault for showing her what a poor state she was in, when a little drawer popped out the side. She observed it a moment, wondering how she had never noticed the thing before. It evoked memories of watching too many reruns of Sanford and Son, where they'd hit their cabinet until the secret compartment opened up. Curious, she stuck a hand in and pulled out a little diary looking thing and a bracelet.
She carried both with her out to the living room, where she turned on a light and plopped down into a chair. First, she looked over the bracelet. It was beautiful, looking like an antique that was crafted with care and precision. The stone had an odd way of reflecting the light so that it caught her eye, no matter the angle. She set it aside for further inspection later.
Lois looked at the little diary type thing, wondering if it and the bracelet had always been in there and she'd just never found them before. She opened it up to find her own handwriting on the first page.
Read Me.
She stared at the thing for a moment, a little wary of what could be inside. She had never been one to keep a diary, so why the hell would she have started now? And why leave it somewhere that it may never be found? She shook her head and rolled her eyes at herself, figuring she'd find answers inside.
This is the diary of Lois Lane, soon to be Lois Lane Kent. It's July 4th, 2017, and Clark and I are getting married in just over three months.
This is being written because I don't know when I will forget again and could be of use for living in a new year. My first time forgetting was April 4th, 2013, which is now four years and three months ago. The second time I forgot was January 3rd, 2016, a year and a half ago.
We still don't know what causes this, and I hope that the purpose of this is never necessary, but in case it is, I know this will be of help.
Right now Clark and I are barreling towards our wedding. Chloe is being an absolute terror, getting on me about this detail and that detail, despite the fact that she's pregnant with twins. (She's due in mid December). As I hear told, her wedding was a small affair where the details were minimal and taken care of by Alfred and Bruce, so I'm letting her fret over the details for mine. It keeps me sane and lets me focus on making a life with Clark one day at a time.
Superman (if Clark's holding out about that, go ask him about tights) saved a school bus from falling off a bridge today (I don't know why, but that seems to happen a lot). I can't believe he can do what he does for the world. When he told me who he was, I broke out in laughter and it took Chloe telling me it was true before I believed him. He held out on me until four months after I lost my memory before telling me! I had to suppress the urge to clock him on the jaw so I didn't hurt myself.
But, enough about what's going on. Here's some information that will be of more use to you.
When I most recently lost my memory, Clark and I were working on a story about LexCorp launching a new satellite. You know that nothing good can come from Lex doing anything at all, so we were doing our best to see what was behind the scenes of this, but we came up with zilch.
Clark had left to do some Superman stuff and I decided I wanted to cook a nice dinner (I found that hard to believe) so apparently I went to the store. Clark got home, I was there, he showered, I got home and I had him make cheeseburgers. They never actually got eaten though, because we decided to get engaged instead.
The gist of it is, I proposed. I was disbelieving when I first heard about it, but being with him now, it does kind of make sense. He did actually propose to me this time, but that's another story for another time.
When I woke up the next morning, I thought it was 2008 again. As you may well know, that sucks ass.
Unfortunately, that's as much as I can impart right now. I'll try to update this once a month, or something along those lines so that if I forget in the future, I'll at least be able to know a little. I'm hoping that it won't happen again, but it's me, so I'm banking on my memory being gone again before the new decade at least once, if not twice.
I'm not planning on showing this to Clark; I love the man like crazy, but this is something I need to do for me, if not now then the me in the future.
LL.
Before Lois could read any further, she heard a noise at the door to the balcony and Clark walked in, cape over one arm. He closed the back door slowly and turned, his eyes meeting hers.
"Hey. Is everything alright?"
Lois gave him a small smile and discretely tucked the journal down into the couch cushion. "Jordan woke up a while ago and had issues with her closet, much like I used to. We were going to take care of the scary things, but she fell asleep on me before we could get around to it."
"Special water, eh?"
"I take it you've heard that one a few times before."
"Heard it and used it. Jordan and I made some special water about six months ago when the chief put you on a story out in Gotham and you stayed with Chloe and Bruce. It's always enjoyable to put a bunch of stuff into a bowl of water, but usually the story is good enough to put Jordan back to sleep. I think she just likes hearing it and the reassurance it brings."
Lois stood up and stretched. "Tried and true tradition, Smallville, passed on from mother to child in my mom's family for generations. Not always the closet, but wherever a monster hides, special water takes care of it. Now, how about you get your butt back into bed so I can get back to sleep, because I've tried everything else and it isn't working."
"I can see that." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and led her back towards the bedroom before stopping. He went back and picked up the bracelet, handing it to her. "Where'd you find this? You have some special place for it you've never told me about so Jordan can't mess with it."
"I was, uh, looking around in my dresser drawer for a more comfortable bra and this was way back at the back. I thought it looked nice, so I've just been messing with it since."
"You always seem to take to it whenever you find it. It's a pretty special bracelet, you know."
Lois, now more curious than tired, wondered why a bracelet would be important and decided to put a voice to that. "Special? What, is this the first piece of jewelry you ever bought me, Smallville?"
Clark wrapped an arm around her shoulders and led her back to the bedroom, closing the door behind him. She went and sat on the bed and he changed in a blink, joining her. "Not exactly. This bracelet was given to me by a girl from the Kawatche tribe, and is meant for my true one."
"Your what?"
"True one, a.k.a. soul mate. See, the paintings in the caves in Smallville are Kryptonian, kind of. They tell of Naman, which is me, and Segeeth, which is my mortal enemy. And then there's also a symbol representing my soul mate. When I found her, I was supposed to give her the bracelet, and so about six months after we first got together, when I really knew you were all I'd ever want because I only ever wanted you, I gave it to you. Since then you've always kept it close by, but only wear it on special occasions, when I've noticed."
"Guess that's why the light reflecting off the stone is so appealing to the eye."
"It does seem to hold some mystic qualities, though I'm not quite sure what. You never tell me what it does, saying that it's special and reaffirms your love for me. After that, my curiosity wanes and I just like to keep you close."
Lois looked at it for another moment before setting it down on her bedside table. She crawled under the covers and laid her head down on Clark when he did the same. She was asleep within seconds.
Waking up, Lois pulled some hair out of her eyes. Sunlight was streaming into the bedroom at a much more alarming rate than it should be early in the morning. She looked at the clock, which said it was ten 'til noon. She sat up, fighting off a yawn. Why the hell hadn't anybody woken her up? Clark should have gotten her up to be with Jordan, and Jordan should have been in with questions, comments and an assortment of childlike curiosities.
Pushing herself off the bed, she walked over to the door and as she was about to open it found a note taped just above the knob. She grabbed it, opening it up and hoping to find an explanation.
Lo,
I took Jordan to the farm this morning. After a couple unsuccessful attempts to wake you, I figured you could use the sleep. Trying to figure out your life has to be tiring, not to mention taking care of a three year old and being pregnant on top of it all. Enjoy the quiet, because it never lasts as long as you think.
Love, Clark
Lois read the note once more, then shrugged and went out to the kitchen, grabbing a box or Cheerio's and digging in, not bothering with a bowl or milk. She turned on the television to a music channel, finding a channel dedicated to hair bands after trying some of the newer stuff. With the abundance of bad music being put out from when she remembered, it didn't shock her to find her ears offended by what was now passing for music.
She plopped down on the couch, thinking about what she wanted to do when she remembered the diary she'd found last night. Digging around in the couch cushions, she finally pulled the thing out and opened it up to where she'd been the previous night.
8/8/17
So, it's been about a month since my first entry in this thing. So far, so good on the schedule.
Nothing catastrophic has happened in the last month, for once. It seems like there's always a major happening when I get involved in a story. Not that this is news to you, since you're me, but I do find it comforting that some things never change.
Superman is still doing his thing. He stopped a fire down at the pier before it could ravage more than a couple of the buildings. There was an incident with John Corben/Metallo, a cyborg that looks like a human. a couple weeks ago, but nothing directly life threatening. It took some time to get the situation under control, but Superman won out and saved the day yet again.
I found my wedding dress at a little boutique in Smallville. To be more accurate, Martha saw it one day, then got Chloe & I there for a fitting. It was perfect, of course. Like anything Martha Kent ever did, found or even thought wouldn't be. I should seriously consider consulting her on story ideas, because she'd probably win me half a dozen Kerth awards.
Ok, so, how about some information that could actually help you...
This one might go without saying, but I'll say it anyway since you're stubborn: Trust Clark.
But more than that, know that he loves you. If I've forgotten again, it hurts me to think what it's done to him, but he still loves you like nothing else in the world. Remember when you talked to Martha about finding your Jonathan? Your Jonathan is Clark. It's as simple as that. Since I don't know how to put my love for Clark down on paper like I do my love for justice, saying that will just have to do,
So if nothing else gets through your thick skull and past your pride when you read this, remember:
Clark is your Jonathan.
Lois read the last part again. She remembered her conversation with Martha about finding her Jonathan but Clark... Clark was her Jonathan? Wow, that was just... wow. She'd been that happy with him?
She closed the diary and sat it down on the coffee table, resting her chin on her hands. She must have meant well when she had decided to keep the diary, but that thing was giving her feelings she was not ready for. Whenever she let her mind stray to Clark she got this warm feeling in her chest, and just because of some stupid words. Why did she have to be such a good writer? Why couldn't she have been average?
She stuffed the diary away after that, afraid she'd read something that would make her all the more unsure about how she felt about Clark. It was then that he opened the front door, walking in as he pushed his glasses up on his nose. She frowned a bit when that warm feeling in her chest came back, annoyed that her body was once again trying to dictate how things were going to be.
He smiled when he found her on the couch. She followed his eyes as he glanced at the television, which was still blaring the hair bands channel.
"Hey! How's the silence been treating you?"
Lois smirked and muted the music. "Very funny, Smallville. Aren't you supposed to be at work?"
"I figured I'd come home for lunch, see if I could scrounge something together for us to eat. What sounds good to you?"
"Well, I just ate a bunch of Cheerio's, so I'm thinking pizza. Why am I thinking pizza? Who knows, but when you asked me what I wanted, it popped into my head."
"Pizza it is. I'll be back in about ten minutes."
Ten minutes later, Lois watched him walk back into the apartment carrying two huge pizza's. He put them down on the kitchen table, opening the top one and then setting it aside before holing the one that had been underneath it out to her. "Check to be sure, but there should be bacon, Canadian bacon, pepperoni, Italian sausage, pork sausage and hamburger on there."
She opened it up, the smell hitting her and nearly making her add drool as one of the toppings. She grabbed a slice and took a bite, moaning in pleasure embarrassingly loudly but not caring. She finished her bite and decided she should thank him "Smallville, this may be the best thing I've ever had in my mouth. Thank you."
"No need to thank me, Lo. Just one of my many duties as Super husband."
After she'd polished off her third slice, Lois decided she could wait a few minutes for number four. She wanted to talk to Clark first. She walked over from her position at the table and sat down next to him at the bar.
"Smallville, I... well, thank you."
"You don't have to thank me again for the food, Lois."
"No. It's just... you're amazing. You take care of me when I have no idea what's going on, of Jordan so that she isn't aware that I have no idea what's going on, and of the whole world, which probably doesn't know how lucky it is to have you. So... thank you."
"Being there for you and for Jordan is the most important thing I'll ever do, and the same is true for AJ once he or she is born. You've given me a life I never thought I'd have, made me feel love so intense that it floors me and then picks me up again afterwards. I can only be there for the world because I have you. I know you don't remember us, the couple, but I hope that you'll get to know just how special we are together."
The smile that accompanied that statement nearly melted her. He put his pizza away in the fridge, kissed her on top of her head as he walked by and went back to work.
She just sat at the table, staring into space as her mind tried to process what her heart was telling it. She knew it wasn't logical, she knew it wasn't something that made any sense, but she knew it. It wasn't going to be two months before she fell in love with him. It wasn't even going to be one month. It had been days and she was falling in love with him.
She was going to be lucky if she wasn't head over heels in love with him after a week, and as nervous as it made her feel, she still had a smile on her face she couldn't fight, and she wasn't sure she wanted to.
