Chapter 5

I do not own Inuyasha! ; )

"Okay, so I don't know what's going on with my skirt, but flashing the whole world isn't going to work for me. I know I had injuries that needed to be tended to, but did you have to rip my skirt!? Please tell me that you have something for me to change into." Kagome could not believe that she had been out of it for days and the entire time she was introducing nature to the color pink. If there was a need for camouflage, there was no way she would fit in unless the forest decided to grow neon leaves.

"Actually I have acquired a few things for you." Seshomaru pointed to a neatly folded pile of clothes sitting next to a bow and several arrows. "Take the clothes and go bathe, there is a hot spring about ten minutes away. Rin will show you where it is."

"So you're saying that I smell? Great!" Kagome stomped to her new set of clothes and snatched them off the ground.

"Apparently the loss of memory did not affect your attitude. You should work on that. Now go bathe, it will make you feel better."

"Fine! And quit starring at my crotch!"

Seshomaru only acknowledged her statement with a half smile and then turned around and walked off.

"What nerve! I can't believe I'm supposed to have feelings for that man!"

"He's not that bad you know Kagome. He did save us and he didn't have to. By the way, how are your injuries?" Rin was bright eyed and smiled even though Kagome was clearly frustrated. She had the oddest demeanor; she could walk on splinters and still smile.

"My stomach seems to be healing well. Do you by chance know what happened? The cuts look like they were from an animal or something." Kagome wanted more than anything to find out more about herself, even if it was something as small as the cause of her wounds.

"I'm not sure, you should ask Seshomaru." Rin thought so highly of her demon lord; there was nothing that he didn't know or couldn't do.

"Yea, I guess you're right." Following Rin, Kagome walked the rest of the way to the hot spring in silence.

There were large oak trees that surrounded the hot spring making the area more private and comfortable. It was better that it was private; Kagome didn't want to have to worry about any peeping toms, especially not a big demon lord. They may have spent a night embracing, but the initial comfort left the moment she woke finding that his touch was not as familiar as she had originally thought. She felt the need to be held, but it seemed like it should be by someone else. There was an emptiness in Kagome's heart that she could not fill without finding out about her past.

Sliding off her ruined skirt and pink panties, Kagome dipped her toe in the spring water testing the temperature. It was very warm and it actually would be very relaxing to get a chance to let her muscles unwind and to finally clean the dried blood from her body. Unbuttoning her shirt, she threw it onto the pile of dirty clothes making sure to keep it from touching her new ones. Sliding into the water, Kagome found a decent sized rock to lie against while lounging and trying to remember something significant about herself.

"Kagome, are you ok?" Rin had been worrying about Kagome all day. Kagome's mood seemed to change from angry to sad and all the emotions in between within moments of each other. Rin knew that it must be hard to lose your memory, but she had nothing to worry about; Seshomaru would protect them.

"Rin, what do you know about me? I am just so angry that I can't remember anything. I don't know how to pick up and move on without knowing something about myself." Kagome was tired of feeling hopeless and lost. There had to be somewhere she could start from; some piece of information that she can grasp onto that will help her find herself.

"I know that you are a priestess and that you fight against the same demon as Seshomaru. You had friends that fought against Naraku as well. But I never saw them after we were rescued so I don't know if they are alive or not." Rin genuinely wanted to help Kagome, but she really just didn't know very much. It was frustrating for her to see Kagome in the pain that she was in.

"I heard Seshomaru say something about not being able to sense this Naraku fellow. I don't know what that means really and I didn't ask. But you said I had other friends too. Tell me something about them….please. Maybe if I find them they will help me." Kagome couldn't believe it! She had friends out there, they might be dead but what if they weren't. They were her friends, so they would know everything about her. This was more than Kagome could hope for. She would set out immediately and try to find them.

"Well from what I remember there were five of them. There was a woman demon slayer, who had a demon cat, a monk, a kitsune and Seshomaru's half-brother who is a half-demon." Rin's nose scrunched in concentration as she counted off each one of her fingers. It was almost as if starring at her hands would help her remember more clearly the characteristics of each one.

"So that is how they are my friends, I met them through Seshomaru since one of them is his brother."

"Half-brother. And actually it was the other way around I think. You know Seshomaru because of his half-brother." Rin made a point to say half-brother; she knew how irritated Seshomaru would get when people referred to the hanyou as his full brother. Rin just couldn't for life of her remember his name or the others for that matter. She was sure she had over heard them at some point, but they just weren't coming to mind.

Kagome should have been shocked at that last statement, but it didn't surprise her. For some reason she just didn't feel like she was supposed to be with Seshomaru.

I need to find my friends. I hope that they are alive, I don't remember them, but if I did I'm sure I would miss them. Is Seshomaru lying to me? Why would he do that? He said that we were together. Maybe we are, maybe I fell in love with him after meeting him. But that just doesn't sound right? Would I ever love someone who has zero emotion and who's one goal is to frustrate the shit out of me? What a bastard! He better make me fall in love with him again, or this just isn't going to work. I wonder if he would have a problem with me trying to find my friends. I may not know what they look like, but they sound like a group that's pretty hard not to notice. Even if Seshomaru doesn't want me to go, I'll just leave anyway! He doesn't own me! What a jerk. Telling me I'm HIS Miko!! He has balls, I'll give him that much.

"Well that settles it; I'm going to find my friends." Kagome finished washing off and then crawled out of the water leaving Rin to wash the soap out of her hair. Unfolding her new attire, she slipped on her pants which were a forest green. They were tight around her waist and then became baggy around her legs. The pants fit her curves quite nicely, forming to her every move. The shirt was an off white pull over that Kagome tucked into her pants. The outfit was overall comfortable and the material was nice. To finish off her new look, Kagome wrapped a piece of string around her hair forming a low pony tail in the back. She knew that she would be traveling and she didn't want her hair to stick to her face from the sweat.

"That outfit looks good on you. You look like a real priestess now! Seshomaru will be pleased!" Rin had decided to get out and get dressed along with Kagome. She had put back on her flower kimono.

"Ugh. I really don't care if he is pleased or not. But it is nice to be clean and the clothes are comfortable." Kagome slipped on her sandals and threw her bow and arrows over her shoulder. "Are you ready to go back to camp Rin? I want to start finding my friends right away"

"Yup! I'm ready! I'll lead the way." Rin grabbed her belongings and headed for camp. Kagome had to pick up her pace to keep up with the little girl. Rin was quite fast, but it was probably from having to keep up with a demon lord who practically floats. How ridiculous.


"I can't believe how stupid Inuyasha is! It makes me so mad! How can he just give up!?" Sango couldn't believe how Inuyasha so easily gave into depression. "I know he killed Kikyo and now he thinks he killed Kagome, but he doesn't really know! Ugh!" Sango stomped through the forest in rage.

"You know Sango, when you talk about someone you should make sure they aren't there!" Inuyasha jumped from an oak tree and landed in front of Sango.

"Well….I…I didn't think you would come Inuyasha!! Have you decided to stay with us then and try and find Kagome?" Sango hid her embarrassment behind attitude. She really didn't think Inuyasha would come. But it was a relief to now have him with them.

"I am coming with you all to make sure you don't get into any trouble! I don't see how Kagome can be alive, but I will come regardless. Just don't expect my pity when your hearts break at the realization that she is no longer with us!" Inuyasha really wanted to believe that Kagome was alive but she visited him from the spirit world in his dreams; she would have to be dead to do that right? But she did want him to live so that could mean that she might still be alive. At least Inuyasha had secretly hoped that she was still alive. If he found her, he would tell her everything. There would be no way in Hell that he would ever let her out of his sight again.

Smiling, Miroku and Sango shared a look that they knew what was going on; Inuyasha hoped she was alive as well.

"Well, we have been walking all night. Do any of you want to stop for a bath? There should be a hot spring around here if my memory serves me correctly." Miroku winked at Sango as if implying that he would love to do naughty things to her at the hot springs. She politely answered his wink with a slap across the face.

"Miroku! We are not married yet! Get those dirty thoughts from your mind you perv!"

"I do need a bath!" Shippo perked up at the thought of getting a chance to be clean.

"Well, we can take turns, since Sango doesn't want to oblige me with her company. Inuyasha would you like to join me? Sango and Shippo can bathe after!" Smiling at himself for working Sango up, he turned and walked in the direction of the spring with Inuyasha at his heels. Miroku knew how badly Sango wanted him, she just covered it up with a bad attitude! He just knew it.

"You sure can get that woman mad at you Miroku."

"She wants me and she knows it! She is just playing hard to get." Miroku smiled at Inuyasha with his hand covering the red hand mark across his face.

"Ha! That's what you think. Stupid monk! And what is this about getting married?"

"Naraku is dead, and we had always said that she would be my woman after we killed Naraku. I do love her you know; just like you love Kagome."

Her name still caused Inuyasha's heart to break. Looking down at the ground while walking, he just couldn't bring himself to look at Miroku or he would cry.

"I know this is hard for you Inuyasha, but you have to have hope. If we find her, you will be able to tell her how you feel."

"I don't want to talk about this Miroku. You know I may never find her again."

"We are almost there. We can relax for awhile. The longer we are there, the better chance Sango will have cooled off." Chuckling to himself, Miroku nervously scratched the back of his head. The spring came into view and both guys sighed at the sight. It would be wonderful to bathe after the battle with Naraku. They smelled of blood and sweat and who knows what could be crawling in their hair.

As Inuyasha began to undress his nose twitched. Abruptly he hit the ground trying to sniff out what he thought was Kagome's blood. Miroku was so busy trying to fold his clothing that he didn't even notice Inuyasha acting weird. Crawling over rocks and sniffing around the water, he found them. Thrown across the grown was Kagome's school girl uniform. Inuyasha's heart skipped a beat; did this mean that she really was alive?

"Miroku!" Inuyasha pointed at the pile of clothes before bending down to pick them up. The skirt was torn across the front, which infuriated Inuyasha. Who the Hell would tear Kagome's skirt like that!? That person will die if he ever gets his hands on them. Prying his gaze away from the skirt he noticed that her button down was no longer white, but stained with blood. Inuyasha knew why she was bleeding; it was his entire fault. Hugging the clothing to his chest, Inuyasha clenched his teeth and then cried out with anger.

"You know what this means Inuyasha! She is alive! Why else would her school girl outfit be by a spring!? She bathed and then changed clothes!" Miroku looked kind of funny jumping up and down naked, but he did have a point. Why else would her clothes be here?

Inuyasha felt a flood of relief wash over his entire being as he tossed the idea around in his head.

This could mean she is alive! This must be why she didn't want me to give up. Why wouldn't she come to us if she was alive? Maybe she is looking for us and we just haven't crossed paths yet. I must find her, I hope she is alright and will forgive me. I have to tell her how I feel before it's too late.

"Miroku, if you are going to bounce around like that, I would love it if you would put on clothes!" Sitting down on the ground, Inuyasha folded Kagome's outfit over and over until it was perfect. Inuyasha had never been so happy to find a bloody outfit; it was better than finding nothing and never realizing that Kagome was alive.

"Where do you think she got a change of clothes from Inuyasha? If she was badly injured like her blouse suggests, she would not have made it to a town for clothing." Miroku walked up to Inuyasha and leaned his naked body in the direction of her clothes.

"Miroku! Get away from me; I don't enjoy the crotch shot!" Inuyasha's face scrunched as he tried to back away from the naked Miroku. "But that is a good question. If she is still alive, she must be with somebody. But who? Who would help Kagome?" It could be anybody really. Inuyasha could probably follow her scent unless it rains. It appeared from the scent that she had left, that she had been there yesterday morning. She could have gotten pretty far since yesterday, but her scent should still be fairly strong.

"That's a good question Inuyasha. We need to tell Sango, let's go right now. Ugh. How I would have loved a bath though." Miroku started walking towards the direction of camp without even remembering that he definitely needed his clothing.

"Miroku! You better throw on your robe or you're going to get more than a slap! She will kill you! Although, it would be pretty funny." Chuckling at the picture that filled his head, Inuyasha delicately picked up Kagome's folded outfit and headed towards camp while Miroku ran back to the spring to dress.


"So Kagome may be alive!? Let me see the clothes you have." Sango was overcome with relief but she was also cautious. She didn't want to assume Kagome was alive and then get her heart broken again just like Inuyasha had warned. When they first headed out to find Kagome, Sango knew that she was probably dead and she just wanted to at least find her body. But this new evidence meant that she was more than likely alive; this brought new hope and with hope there can be heartache. This is when they needed to tread lightly.

Reaching for the clothes, Inuyasha jerked slightly as if he didn't want to give up the only thing that connected Kagome to life. Realizing what he had done, he quickly gathered his senses and softly laid them in Sango's lap. "I'm sorry Sango, I just can't lose them. They are my connection to her."

"I understand. From the looks of her clothes, she has been through Hell. I wonder why her skirt is ripped from the front. This would basically give a full view of her private areas!" Blushing, Sango refolded the tattered pieces of cloth and handed them back to an eager Inuyasha.

"I noticed! And I'm not happy about it! I will kill whoever did that when I find them!" At the thought of someone being that close to Kagome, Inuyasha flexed his fingers and clenched his jaw. Nobody was allowed to touch Kagome in places that were meant for intimate moments! The thought made Inuyasha want to vomit and then rip apart anybody who had such nerve.

"Calm down Inuyasha, we need to focus on finding her now. Can you find her scent?" Miroku had decided to come back to camp fully clothed, fearing the wrath of his beloved Sango. For him to be a monk and to claim to follow the path of the righteous, he sure was a perv.

"How would you feel if you knew someone had done that to Sango!? Would you not think of ripping them apart!?" Rage coursed through Inuyasha's veins. He was having a difficult time controlling his anger and at this point his demon side was ready to surface.

"You're right, Inuyasha. I would kill anybody who even thought of touching my woman. But right now, we must first think of finding her. It is pointless to stand around and be angry when she could be getting further and further away. We need to rest for awhile to get enough energy to hunt for her and possibly fight for her. We have no idea if she is with someone dangerous." Miroku frowned as he paced back and forth causing a rivet in the dirt.

Visibly calming down, Inuyasha knew that Miroku was right. The only way they would find Kagome is if they focused. There was no point in being blinded by rage, too many mistakes would be made and mistakes could cause Kagome her life. Inuyasha would definitely kill himself if he lost her again, he truly believed now that she was alive and life would be unbearable to know that he had had a chance to find her, but he let that slip as well. Inuyasha wanted so badly to touch her, taste her, hold her to his body and let her know that they could never separate. Inuyasha didn't care about the Shikon no tama, he couldn't believe he ever even let that get in the way of his feelings for Kagome. He was an idiot. There had been so many times that he could have held her and comforted her; but he pushed back his own emotions because his ultimate goal had been to become the very object that he now hates. Kagome had shown him what it was to love life and live, he had been the one to insist on becoming a full demon. And the second Inuyasha evolved, he thanked Kagome by trying to kill her. He really didn't deserve to live now, but he had to go on and find Kagome to make things right. Inuyasha hoped more than anything that she would, at the very least, talk to him.

What if the reason she never came back to me was because she hates me! She knows that I tried to kill her and she is trying to stay as far away from me as possible. Could she ever really be afraid of me? Kagome has seen me in my full demon form before and she didn't fear me at the time or after. But those times I had never almost killed her. She must think that since I couldn't stop myself, that deep down I didn't really care! I have to find her. Kagome….

At the verge of tears, Inuyasha hugged the shreds of her clothing tighter to his chest. Looking from Miroku to Sango, his eyes showed the despair that was twisting his heart. The life in his amber eyes had dimmed and all he could think about was finding her and convincing her that he loved her.

"Grab your things, we need to find her as soon as possible." Not telling them why he was rushing, he tossed Shippo on Kirara's back indicating that it was time to leave. Inuyasha tucked Kagome's school uniform in his jacket to keep it close to his heart; then turned around and began to search for her scent.


Hmmmm. I don't know why that Miko intrigues me. Touching her cause's fire to run through every limb of my body. She isn't afraid of me and she rebels against my authority, I should kill her for this, but instead I want to hold her. She has so much fight and so much life for someone so frail. Why do I feel this way? I have never felt the need to want to touch someone so badly. It's a ridiculous feeling that I should suppress, but every time she comes near my senses become tangled and I find it hard to think. This should never happen to a demon lord because it is considered a weakness but now I feel that not having her would be a weakness. I need to stop thinking like this, my feelings should be indifferent, and I shouldn't care whether or not she lives. I will try to forget this! Rin has made my heart weak, I should have let her die. But I know there is really no way I could have done that. These moments of weakness are going to be the end of me. My Rin will grow up and become old and then eventually die one day, and it will rip the heart from my chest. Its becoming harder and harder to deny my love for that child; just as the more I'm with this Miko I am finding it more difficult to let her out of my sight. Maybe if I just kill her I can stop feeling like this. That's what I will do; I will kill her when she and Rin comes back. There is no reason to put myself in a compromising position. Women only make men weak and Rin is my proof!

Ok! Well Im sorry it took me a little longer than usual to post a new chapter, but this new your stuff has been crazy! Hope everyone enjoyed there New Year's eve! Please let me know what you think,)