---- Chapter 33
Lois sat with her arms crossed, glaring at the television. It hadn't done anything wrong, but Chloe had suggested she glare at something inanimate. She'd agreed grudgingly, though preferring to glare at Clark. She may not remember it, but it was his fault, damn it. It had to be his fault, because it certainly couldn't be hers.
"This sucks."
"We know, Lo."
She looked at the offender out of the corner of her eye, watching as he smiled at the television in an all too sweet and understanding manor. "I'm still blaming you, as typical and ridiculous as it may be."
"I understand. You did the same last time."
"You could at least act annoyed that I'm being irrational."
Clark gasped mockingly, but still didn't look at her. "Lois Lane Kent, irrational? I never thought I'd see the day."
Lois fixed her best glare on him, and he just turned and smiled in that confident, annoying, sexy way. No! Not sexy, just confident and arousing. No, damn it! Confident and annoying... and nothing else. Not a thing. Certainly not sexy, arousing or anything that would make her want to ravage him in front of everybody in the room.
Because that would be wrong.
She looked away from him and back at the television. Texas was beating the hell out of A&M this year in their annual Friday after Thanksgiving game. She didn't really care one way or another, but it wasn't surprising. From what she'd read, the 'Horns were looking to get a number one seed in the playoffs.
She looked back at Clark, who was still wearing that damned smile. They were sitting with the kids, most of which were ignoring the football game. Jack seemed thoroughly ensconced, but Lois thought that might just be him trying to imitate his Uncle Clark. The boy wanted to be just like him, it seemed, and watching football was a good way to do that.
He couldn't really pick a better man to try and model himself after. Hell, he was pretty much the best man in the world, when it came right down to it. Standing for good the way he did. She had no problems with the way Bruce handled criminals in Gotham, but compared to the way Clark handled criminals... Superman almost did things in a naïve way. And for her, for some ridiculous reason, it was a complete turn on, just like every other damn thing Clark did.
Stupid hormones. They were to blame for all this. They kept making her thoughts stray towards Clark and just how much she wanted to be with him. Since she couldn't remember being with him, it just fueled the fire more now that they had very obviously been together. She looked down at her stomach. Very, very obviously. It seemed like her stomach had protruded a few more inches overnight.
She was still looking at him and he still just sat there, not thinking about her plight, the jackass. "I'm sitting around in your pajama pants, Smallville, because none of the pants that I have here would fit!"
"And here I thought you were trying to bring plaid back into style. I asked if you wanted to pack some of your maternity pants, just in case, and you just scoffed at me and said something about it being unlikely you'd need them. You even went so far as to take them out of my bag when I packed them, just in case."
"I want my real pants to fit."
"So I've heard."
They sat in silence for a while. Lois was looking at the television, but she wasn't paying much attention to the pigskin.
He was right. Again.
He knew what could happen and she didn't. Again.
He looked all sexy like. Again.
God, this was torture!
Well, that was a lie. She got to look at, sleep with and find comfort in a man that put the Greek pantheon to shame. The man took care of the world and had the heart to take care of her too. He loved her, unconditionally. Lois sighed to herself. She didn't deserve what she had, and she knew it. It was plain as day in her mind. Everything she had was too good for her.
But she wanted it. She couldn't believe how much she loved it now that she was right in the middle of the mayhem. She loved Chloe and her family. She always knew that she would, when it happened, because she'd always figured herself for a loveless marriage. She'd dreamed of Chloe's family as an escape.
And then Jordan... she thought about it so much, but it never failed to grip her at just how much she loved her baby girl. It invaded her thoughts when she woke up, and it was on her mind when she went to bed at night. Jordan this, Jordan that... she knew that her heart had been invaded so quickly because it was her daughter, but still...
And then Clark. She looked at him again, studying his profile a second before reaching over and placing a hand on his. He turned to her.
"What's up?"
"Can we go talk a minute?"
"Yeah, sure." Clark smiled and stood as she did. She watched as he took a look at all the kids, making sure they were all set for a few minutes before guiding her out into the hallway.
"So, what needs to be said?"
Lois took a dep breath, steadying herself. "Clark, you're too good for me. And before you interrupt, I don't mean that in an entirely self-deprecating way. You're probably too good for a lot of women in the world, and those that are good enough would probably let you go so that you could stay focused on being a symbol of peace.
"But I'm not that type of woman. I'm selfish. I can't believe that you're in my life, like this, but I don't care anymore. I want you the way you want me. I want to embrace a life with you the way I have with Jordan and Almond Joy. I want you to know that I feel more strongly about you in thirteen days than I have about any other man in my life that I remember.
"I love you, Clark. It's stupid, it's irrational and it doesn't make any sense in or out of my head, but I do. I am so ridiculously in love with you because I can't think about anything else. When I think about Jordan, it comes back to you. When I think about Almond Joy, it comes back to you. When I think about just about anything lately, it comes back to you. About how you're caring, about how you're the most compassionate man I've ever met or could hope to meet.
"So that's it. I love you, Smallville." She took a few deep breaths once she finished, realizing suffocation was not the way one wanted to follow a declaration of love. Would be going out with a bang, but for now she'd prefer to just stick around.
"You sure you got everything out?"
"Yeah, seems like it."
"Good, I'm glad." He bent down and kissed her, and her knees just about gave out. She wrapped her arms around his neck more out of necessity than being in the moment, but that fact barely entered her mind as she kissed him back as best she knew how. He pulled away slowly, smiling at her.
"I love you, Lois. I've never meant anything more in my entire life. If the sun never rose again, I'd never be without light because I would have you with me." He paused a second, then rolled his eyes. "Ok, that's pretty cheesy, even for me, but I think you get the drift."
This time she pulled him down and initiated the kiss, and it went on a good deal longer than the first one had. She had to fight the urge to growl as he pulled away from her again.
"The young people in the other room are going to think we abandoned them."
"Five bucks says they haven't even noticed."
When they peeked into the room, all were still involved in the activities they'd been left to. She grinned and pulled back out of the room as he shut the door again.
"Pay up, Smallville."
He made a show of feeling at all his pockets, smiling slyly as he did so. "I don't seem to have any cash on me. Is there a way I could, say, work the debt off?"
She gave him her best lascivious smile. "Damn right you... hey, Martha!"
Lois plastered a smile that held much less lasciviousness as she greeted her.
"What are you two up to?"
Lois shrugged, doing her best to look innocent as less than innocent thoughts ran through her head about the woman's son.
"Ya know, not much. We came out her to talk for a minute away from the smaller eared crowd."
Lois's eyes went everywhere in the hallway that wasn't Martha. When they settled on Clark, she had a hell of a time tearing them away and only did so when Martha spoke again.
"Well, if you two could use some time to yourselves, I'd be happy to keep an eye on the children. I always enjoy getting time in with Chloe's kids, since they don't have any true grandparents of their own. I try to make them feel loved, and they feel as much a part of my family as Jordan does."
"You do a great job making them feel a part of the family, mom, because they are. You're Grandmother Martha to the Wayne family."
Martha smiled. "I know. I just hope the kids know how much I love them. Have a nice time."
Lois nodded and smiled at her as she walked into the room. Without looking at Clark, she spoke. "So, what do we want to do that kills a couple hours?"
A Couple Hours Later...
"Wow." Lois had lost the better part of her vocabulary after the third orgasm. The journal had been right: three to one. That was definitely a ratio she was going to enjoy as much as she could. But it hadn't all been what she'd thought it would be. It had been slow, passionate and as intense an experience as she could remember.
She rolled over and laid her head on Clark's shoulder. "I think I finally understand the term 'make love' now, because I never really got it before. Until this, it's always just been 'having sex' or... well, that's it."
"Really?" He ran a hand over her back slowly, sending chills up her spine. "Funny, you've never said that before after our first time together."
"I try not to be predictable."
She listened to him chuckle. "I would never presume to label you predictable, Lo. It's just hard for me not to compare each memory loss against the others.. The last two times when we were together you gave me some version of a speech about mind blowing sex and being really glad we did that."
"That does sound a lot more like me than what I said. But it's true. Before the attack and I started losing my memory, I'd had sex. It had been good, most of the time, but this... mind blowing sex is a good description of it, but I don't think it does it justice. The way I feel about you made it something more."
Lois paused for a moment, thinking about what she'd just said. She shook her head and rubbed a hand over her face. "I sound like a romantic goofball. I had no idea that cheesy romanticism could be contagious, and you should have warned me."
"Now why would I want to do something like that? Call me crazy..."
"Don't tempt me."
"...but I like to hear you be the cheesy romantic every now and again. I love that I can bring out those feelings in you, ones you never thought you could or would have."
Lois thought about it a moment. "Now and again is all you're going to get because I... woah."
Lois sat up, placing a hand against her stomach. Clark sat up a second later. "What's wrong?"
"No, nothing. I think AJ just kicked, though. I hadn't ever felt it until now."
Lois wasn't even sure what she'd felt. It had just been like a couple flutters on the right side of her stomach. It could be anything really... but then it happened again. Without thinking about it, she broke into a grin and grabbed Clark's hand, placing it where she'd felt the kicks. They waited a second, and it happened once more.
And she'd thought the love making would be the highlight of her day.
"I can't believe this."
Clark placed a soft kiss on her shoulder. "Believe it, Lo. That's Almond Joy, letting you know the he or she is there." He suddenly got a faraway look on his face, and she knew what that meant.
"Go. Keep people safe."
He smiled at her and disappeared with a gust of wind. She smiled after him, and it only grew as she felt AJ flutter again. It was one of the most amazing things she'd ever felt. She looked down at her stomach and took a deep breath. She hadn't had the courage to do this until now.
"I know I should have done this sooner, but I think this is finally real to me now. You're kicking, and I'm really starting to show... it's just that, before this, I loved you, but you were still an idea. Now, you're very real to me. I can feel you in there now, and it just makes me... happy. It's not a regular kind of happy, though. I don't know how to describe it, but I know that you can feel it too, because you're the one bringing these feelings about.
"I'm your mother, AJ. If you're wondering how you got that nickname, I'll have your dad tell you how he came up with it when he gets back. He's a great man and an even greater father, and you may be one of the luckiest children in the world because you have him. It's not just that you just have him, but you are a part of him. That makes you special.
"It seems silly, and I have no real proof, but I'm almost positive that you're a boy. When your father and I were flying last weekend, I had this... this vision of me running around with a little boy. I think it was too vivid to be a daydream, so I believe that somehow I was seeing you... my little boy.
"Please, please know that above everything else, first and foremost, I love you. You're as much me as you are your father, but I get this special privilege of carrying you and making sure you come into the world with ten fingers and toes. I promise you, despite my mind being the way it is, I am doing my best to make sure you're healthy and happy. You and your big sister are my top priority, no matter what. If I... when I forget you, know that it's happening because of a bad man. If I had any choice, I would remember every minute of the time I have with you and your sister."
Lois wiped away tears from her cheek, unable to hold them back any longer. She didn't even know why she was crying, but she didn't really care; she kept speaking, despite them.
"You're going to do great things, AJ. I don't think your genes would allow you not to, be they the kryptonian or human ones. As much power as you may have from your father, we Lane's are no tame bunch. We do everything with our whole heart. Anything less isn't acceptable. You can see that in the General, your grandfather, Lucy, your aunt, and even me.
"And then you have the Kent's. I'm so sorry that you'll never get to know your grandfather Jonathan. He was one of the greatest men a person could ever hope to meet, always expecting the best of people, no matter what. He saw the world for what it could be, and passed that belief on to your father.
"And your grandmother, Martha, is a force to be reckoned with. Trust me when I say, you will never meet a more wise person in your life. And she'll love you, unequivocally. Her love is special, though: it makes you feel like you're a better person for having it. She has so much room in her heart that when you feel lost, she'll take you in and keep you safe with her love until you can face the world again.
"That's the kind of mother I want to be for you, AJ. I want you to feel, to know that I will always be here for you, no matter what. I promise that I'll always do my best to keep you safe from harm, even if you're invulnerable like your father. It's my right, as your mother. And, at times, I will worry about you too much. Know that it will be because I want you to be as happy as I am. If I could spend my life finding you the happiness I have now, it would be a more successful life than I could have ever imagined."
Lois spent the next twenty minutes talking to AJ, telling him everything she could think of and reaffirming that she loved him as much as she could. She must have said it forty times in ten different ways by the time she finished speaking, and she just wanted to say it more.
After her talk, she got out of bed and took a shower. She dressed in Clark's pajama pants again, not really caring anymore, along with one of her shirts. She was about to walk out of the room and join everybody else downstairs when Clark opened the door and walked into their room. When he spotted her, he smiled.
"Headed somewhere?"
"I didn't know when you were going to be back, so I was going to join everybody downstairs."
"Well, that's one plan. I was thinking we should be a little more anti-social, though." He walked over to her and pulled her into a hug. "Know what I mean?"
"Oh, do I." She pushed up on her toes and kissed him, hoping she could pass just how happy she was through the gesture. She pulled away, grinning. "And in case you forgot, I really love you, Smallville."
