Rory exited her room to the familiar sight of Logan moving toward Charlie's room. She noticed that Logan had moved his makeshift bed to the floor of the living room. The lumpy couch was a less than ideal situation.
"I can get him this morning," offered Rory.
Charlie was standing in his crib, bouncing happily. He held himself up with his small hands wrapped around the bars of the crib. When he saw Rory and Logan at the door, he frantically began waving his hands around like Logan had taught him two days earlier. Without the bars for balance, he fell backwards onto his diaper. Not showing any frustration, he pulled himself back to his feet.
"I don't mind." The way Logan looked at their son made Rory's heart go out to him. Maybe Logan was right. Maybe she had done something wrong by not calling him back when he didn't return the message. At the time, it had all seemed so clear cut. Everything else felt confusing and overwhelming, but leaving Logan out of it after he didn't call her back had seemed the simple part.
"I'll change his diaper, you pick out his outfit?" negotiated Rory, picking up her son from the crib. Charlie eagerly grabbed at Rory's face. His little hands moved from Rory's nose to mouth and then onto her hair, pulling relentlessly at the loose strands.
Logan went to the dresser, and began searching through the drawers. He seemed to take the task at hand very seriously, despite the fact that Charlie would no doubt have to be changed again before lunch. The drawers were overfilled with outfits; Lorelai didn't have much self-control when it came to baby stores.
"What do you think?" asked Logan, holding two outfits for Rory to choose. "Dinosaur or tuxedo?"
In one hand, Logan had a two-shade green onesie with plush spikes running down the back. It even had a hood with eyes and dramatic teeth sewed on. In the other hand, a short sleeved black and white onesie with a bowtie, buttons and a pocket square drawn on.
Rory made a show of weighing the two options. Finally, she answered, "Dinosaur."
Logan nodded. "Tuxedos are too formal for a Sunday."
They dressed Charlie together and Rory carried Charlie into the kitchen to give him breakfast. Logan grabbed the folded pack and play from against the wall in Charlie's room and began to assemble it in the living room. Wordlessly, he folded up the sheets and comforter from the floor he had spent the night on.
"I can watch him this morning if you need to work or something." Rory noted how hopeful Logan sounded.
"That sounds great. You want to feed him?"
Logan walked quickly into the kitchen before Rory could change her mind. Rory handed Charlie and the bottle carefully to Logan.
"There's some baby food in the 'fridge if he's still hungry," offered Rory, retreating into the living room. Within minutes, the small table had been covered in her array of papers and her laptop. In her lap was the binder that Jess had given her two days prior. Her face was immediately serious as she delved into the many notes Jess had scribbled into the margins.
Logan took a seat in the kitchen. He happily watched as the contents of the bottle quickly disappeared.
"You still hungry, bud?" asked Logan. He began searching through the contents of the refrigerator, moving numerous half empty cartons of Chinese food out of the way and extraneous left overs before finding jars of baby food tucked away.
"Peas or peaches?" Logan asked his son. He placed Charlie in his high chair, taking care to make sure that the straps were adequately placed. He offered both containers to his son.
Eagerly, Charlie grabbed at one of them. Logan reflected on the label.
"Peaches it is," agreed Logan, turning around to grab one of the padded baby spoons. He fastened a bib around his son's neck. "You're right. Who eats peas for breakfast anyway?"
Strategically, Logan began feeding his son. His attempts to get as much of the mushed up peaches into Charlie's mouth was met with merry resistance. Gleefully, Charlie tried to grab the spoon from Logan every time he put it near his mouth. When Logan evaded his son's attempts for the spoon, Charlie settled for shoving his fingers in his full mouth and painting his face with peaches.
After Charlie had already made a huge mess of the peaches, Logan gave him the spoon. Charlie immediately began banging it against the high chair table. The baby was delighted by his new noisemaker. Logan put the peaches away and began cleaning up the mess. He began first with Charlie's face and then worked toward his hands. Finally, he cleaned the table before lifting Charlie from the chair.
"Babababababababa!" pleaded Charlie as Logan carried him into the living room. Logan laughed at his son's emphatic requests for a bottle.
"You have your mother's appetite," Logan teased. He placed Charlie on the floor and situated himself between Charlie and the table.
"Mamamamamama," Charlie babbled, catching sight of Rory working diligently on the couch. To her benefit, she focused on her work and tried to give Logan space to take care of Charlie without being overbearing.
Logan handed Charlie a small plush soccer ball with handles that rattled when shaken and a smiling face embroidered onto it. Charlie began vigorously shaking the toy, happy with his noisemaker.
"Da-da," coached Logan as his son rolled onto his stomach to crawl toward the corner where he knew more toys to be hidden away.
"Da-da" repeated Logan. He lifted his son from the floor and placed him in his lap. He began to tickle him.
Charlie smiled and thrashed merrily in Logan's lap. Logan continued his efforts to teach Charlie a new word, a new name.
"Mamamamama!" protested Charlie.
"He's stubborn," laughed Rory. "Mom has been trying to teach him Ga-ga or La-la ever since he started talking."
"I'll wear him down eventually," asserted Logan. He blew air on his son's stomach, sending him into a new fit of giggles. Logan barely managed to move his head quick enough to avoid being kicked in the face. "Da-da!"
Watching the pair interact, Rory suddenly grew solemn. "What time do you have to leave?"
Logan paused. He looked toward Rory and studied her for a long moment before returning his attention to Charlie. "Around noon."
"Are you coming back tonight?" asked Rory, feigning disinterest. She wasn't sure how much she wanted to know. Even though it had only been a few days, she had grown accustomed to having Logan around. She didn't want that to change. However, she wanted the decision to come from Logan; she didn't want him to have any regrets in regards to how he handled the situation at hand.
"Sorry, that's none of my business." Rory quickly amended her statement, making a show of returning intently to the notes in the binder. Her mind was anywhere but focused on the scribbled words in front of her.
"I'll be back tonight," volunteered Logan smoothly, ignoring Rory's apology. Rory gave no indication that she had heard him.
"Da-da" urged Logan, returning his attention to Charlie once more.
Rory sat on the couch with the television on. Despite having sat in the same place for the last fifteen minutes, she had no idea what she was watching. Her mind was in a different place.
She had put Charlie down nearly an hour ago, and without him to distract her, her mind had begun to worry.
She regretted not asking more questions of Logan that morning but reminded herself that it really wasn't any of her business. She tried to sort out her emotions, but couldn't put a name to what she was feeling. Rory had picked up the phone multiple times since Logan had left after lunch, but when she went to dial the number she found herself uncertain of whom she wanted to talk to. Her mother? Lane? Logan?
She thought about calling Jess and seeing if he could talk work, but she feared his reaction to finding Logan at the apartment two nights prior. That was a battle that Rory wasn't ready to face just yet, especially when she was wracked with this uneasy feeling regarding Odette's sudden appearance.
Instead, Rory remained alone with her thoughts.
Rory checked the time for the third time in the last two minutes. The clock showed 8:03. Logan had been gone for nearly eight hours. Methodically, Rory tried to account for the missing time. It would have taken an hour or more depending on traffic to drive into the city and the same amount of time back. He would have had to deal with getting in and out of the airport. Politely, Logan may have kept her company as Odette waited for her flight back to London. Or would she have spent the night in New York? That left approximately five hours unaccounted for and with every moment that passed the uncertainly grew.
Rory's mind ran rampant. Five hours. With the time difference, would they have gotten dinner? Drinks? A hotel room?
The thought shocked Rory. Her mind went frantically blank briefly before another thought creeped in: why did she care?
Slowly, the door opened. Rory silently thanked the reprieve and got up to greet Logan.
Immediately she knew something wasn't right.
Logan walked past Rory in the living room and went immediately to the kitchen. He filled a cup with water and sat at the table. He sat with his back to Rory.
Rory followed him into the kitchen. She hesitated before sitting down across from him. After all day wishing for Logan to return, she suddenly found herself without words.
"How did you get back?" asked Rory finally. Even after being apart from Logan, she knew his drunken tells.
Logan didn't acknowledge she had said anything; he wouldn't look at her. He focused intently on the water in front of him.
"Logan, tell me you didn't drive home," pleaded Rory. The man in front of her was a stark contrast from the one who had left earlier in the day. Logan sat slouched over the table, looking drained.
"I didn't drive home," Logan said carefully, focusing on enunciating each of his syllables.
Rory breathed a sigh of relief. She wanted to ask how it went, but thought better of it. She got up and walked toward the front door in order to lock it. When she turned back around, Logan was standing. He stared intently at her.
"Do you think I'm an awful person?"
"What?" asked Rory, taken completely aback.
"You must think I'm an awful person," answered Logan. He continued to stare.
"Logan, where is this coming from?" asked Rory softly. He didn't respond. He just kept staring. "No, I don't think you're an awful person."
Logan laughed. He shook his head and sat back down at the kitchen table. "You think I'm an awful person."
"What's going on?" asked Rory. She returned to the table and moved her chair closer to his. "Logan, talk to me."
"You weren't even surprised that I didn't call you back. You never even thought that maybe – maybe I hadn't gotten the message. Phones mess up, you know." Despite his agitated demeanor, Logan managed to keep his voice steady.
"It's not like that," countered Rory, suddenly feeling drowned in guilt. The thought slammed around her head; had she been wrong?
"What's it like then?" snapped Logan. He visibly gathered himself. Diplomatically, he added, "I would have been there for you, Ace. I would have been there for Charlie. Taken you to the doctor and gotten you weird craving food and been there when he was born. I would have been there when my son was born."
"I left you a voicemail, Logan. You never called back, and I thought that it was because you didn't want to be a part of this," answered Rory, trying to explain herself.
"Haven't you ever heard that anything said in a voicemail doesn't count?" countered Logan emphatically.
Rory was silent for a long time before finally responding. "I didn't want to ruin your life. You were engaged, Logan."
Logan scoffed and shook his head. "That's not an excuse."
"I didn't know you didn't get the message," countered Rory. "I thought you ignored it. I thought you - "
"You thought I was the type of person that would abandon my kid," asserted Logan. "You thought I didn't want to be here. You thought I didn't want to be with him. You thought I didn't want to be with you."
Logan seemed surprised by the words that rushed from his mouth, but continued on.
"Odette said you didn't even put my name on the birth certificate," accused Logan. "Is it true?"
"Yes," replied Rory simply.
"It's true you didn't put my name on my son's birth certificate?" exclaimed Logan. He stood; despite his drunken state, he couldn't stay still any longer.
"I didn't put your name on the birth certificate, because I didn't think you wanted to be a part of Charlie's life," explained Rory slowly. She felt trapped in the circular argument. There was no winning.
"Right!" exclaimed Logan dramatically. "You thought I was the type of person who wouldn't want anything to do with my kid."
"Logan, I'm sorry. I was wrong."
"I'm going to petition to have my name added," responded Logan fiercely. He shook his head in disbelief. "I want my name on his birth certificate. I am his father."
"You should," encouraged Rory.
Her agreement took Logan aback. Nonetheless, he continued with his argument.
"I'm serious. I'm going to be on his birth certificate."
"I'm serious too," agreed Rory. She repeated, "I was wrong, Logan. I'm sorry."
In that moment, Rory suddenly realized that she had inadvertently stolen the first ten months of Charlie's life from Logan.
Logan reached into his pocket and tossed the contents onto the table. A silver ring with a large diamond flittered on the table. It spun in circles from the force until it laid still in front of Rory. The band glittered with small diamonds as the silver metal wrapped in delicate patterns around the large stone set in the center.
"Logan - " began Rory, her eyes growing large at the sight of the ring on the table. Her mind raced, but she couldn't form a coherent sentence.
"Relax, Ace," commented Logan, reading her reaction. "It's Odette's. It was Odette's. Guess it felt more dramatic to give it back."
Rory felt a pang of guilt. She reflected on Logan's promise the day before that Charlie hadn't been the only thing standing between his marriage to Odette and a blissful life, but Rory couldn't help but feel that this was the second marriage she had ruined. Her guilt-ridden heart went out to Odette. The woman that she had tried to pretend didn't exist for the last few years; the woman whose life she had silently derailed and never even met.
"Are you okay?" awkwardly asked Rory. She wasn't sure how to navigate the situation.
Logan sipped at his water. He finally mumbled, "Yeah," but Rory could tell he was lost in his own thoughts.
Rory didn't want to press Logan for what he was going through but wanted him to know she was there for him. She could only imagine the conflicting emotions and obligations he felt. Silently, she reached her arm around his waist and tried to hug him from their seated position. Instinctively, Logan's arm went around Rory's shoulder.
After a long moment, Logan stood, leaving the flashy ring on the table. He massaged his temples and picked up his glass of water.
"She won't talk to the press about Charlie anymore," promised Logan. He lifted his glass, as if celebrating the small victory. He seemed weighed down by his thoughts. Trying to make peace, he added, "Let's just watch a movie or something.
