Chapter 7: The Hunter
Author's Note: Sorry, gang, but I'm not adding every single character from W.O.Y. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know. Anyway, Merry (belated) Christmas and enjoy!
Meanwhile, in outer space, Lord Dominator was watching them all from her ship's computer, cackling with glee. "Hopeless idiots! Mercy, of all the inane stragglers..." The lime-skinned woman slumped in her chair and snapped her fingers. "Computer! Get the coordinates of their next location and transmit them to Bot 17. Bot 17! Go there and hire a bounty hunter to lure these dorks over to me."
"Any particular bounty hunter?" The robot droned.
Dominator grinned wider than the Cheshire cat. "Yes..."
After lunch, the five travelers said their goodbyes to the watchdogs and left via orbble bubble. This time, King Draykor and Lord Hater walked beside Sylvia, holding on to her reins, while she had Wander and Peepers on her back. Everyone just calmly stared off into space, enjoying the tranquility and captivating view.
The peace of space travel was interrupted by a boisterous belch from Lord Hater.
King Draykor huffed. "Excuse you!" Hater was about to retort, but Sylvia decided to beat him to it and touch on a more pressing subject.
"So... where does this wizard live anyway, Wander?"
Wander just grinned confidently. "Oh, Sylvia! Remember what the princess told us? He lives in - Oh geez. She didn't say, did she?" He began looking around himself. "And there are no more yellow stars to follow!"
Peepers shrugged nonchalantly. "No matter. We'll just ask for directions."
"Help me! Help me!"
Wander fiercely tugged on the reins, halting the ride, because he had heard the faintest cries for help from a nearby planet. Everyone else heard them, too, but Sylvia was not so easily convinced.
If I didn't know any better, Sylvia thought to herself, I'd say those cries seem a little... forced and... robotic...Oh, Wander, please just ignore it and -
"Sylvia! We gotta help! Someone's in trouble again!"
Why did I expect anything different? Sylvia groaned to herself. "Wander, I know what you're thinking, but doesn't that voice sound a bit strange to you?"
"Oh, Sylvia! You've heard all kinds of voices, haven't you? We mustn't be so quick to judge."
"We don't have time for that!" Lord Hater snapped harshly. "We need directions!" Then, as if on cue, the planet's massive skyscrapers towering over its biggest city flashed in bright, neon green letters, WE PROVIDE DIRECTIONS!
Wander smiled and gestured to the planet. "Problem solved."
"I'm twitching," Peepers spoke up nervously. "So that means something's fishy."
"You're sure it's not just because you're a persistent pessimist?" Sylvia couldn't help herself. Peepers looked like the stereotypical nerdy kid that bullies used to pick on. It wasn't that Sylvia thought bullying was acceptable, but she knew seeing the eyeball turn red would brighten her day.
And, just as she assumed, Peepers flushed angrily and looked ready to cuss away comets as Sylvia cracked a smile. "I am NOT a persistent pessimist!"
"Sure..."
"Sylvia, come on! Let's go help him or her!" Sylvia complied, and everyone landed in the planet's most urban area. Pedestrians of all species scattered, out and about. Hovering cars, jeeps, and buses zipped from one place to another. Shopkeepers and vendors tried to lure customers over to their knickknacks and souvenirs. The aromas of stews, sweets, and other treats of edible goodness emanated from the restaurants and diners and mingled with the crisp air. But among all the hustle and bustle, Wander could not find anyone who looked like they needed help.
"Helloooo?" Wander shouted. "Does anybody need any help?" He hopped off of Sylvia and frowned confusedly. "Huh. I thought I heard someone..." Draykor was about to suggest that they move on, but Wander spotted a small, big-eyed kitten holding the body of a decapitated teddy bear and pouting adorably at the neglecting passersby.
Just our luck, Sylvia thought bitterly as Wander's eyes grew huge and tearful at the sight of the poor kitty.
"Hewo." The cute kitten greeted the five with watery violet eyes. "I'm Wittle Bits. Could you help me?"
Wander practically melted at the sight of Little Bits. "Aw, you're so cute!" His eyes began to turn bright green, and they never left the kitten. "Of course we'll help you!"
Little Bits smiled gratefully and turned to the others. "What are your names?"
"Sylvia." The zbornak rolled her eyes at Wander. Personally, she just didn't do cute. "And this goofball's Wander. Peepers, Lord Hater, and his majesty King Draykor. We need directions to -" Little Bits suddenly purred and brushed her lavender fur against everyone's legs.
"Rewax, my fwiends..." Peepers, Hater, and Draykor froze, and their eyes turned bright green as well. Then, the kitten lured Wander and the others into a sketchy, dark alley.
Sylvia watched them all with comically wide eyes. "Are you guys kidding me? What's the matter with you all?!"
"That lisp..." Hater responded groggily. Peepers nodded dreamily.
"Too adorable..."
Sylvia could only watch as Little Bits grinned malevolently at her and whispered, "Sweep."
Sleep?! Sylvia frantically scrambled over to the swaying quartet as they fell to the ground. She picked up Wander first and lightly shook him. His bleary eyes and tired, loopy grin confirmed her fears. "Stay with me, buddy! Wander! Wander!"
Wander simply yawned and nestled in Sylvia's arms. "Gonna lie down now..." Sylvia then tried to arouse the others, but all her efforts were in vain.
Little Bits watched Sylvia amusedly. "Give up, Thylvia. Fall pwey to my gorgeous eyes - "
"Fall prey to this, lil' b!" Sylvia smacked Little Bits hard, and the kitten hit the brick wall beside her and passed out cold.
With the feline menace out of the way, Sylvia turned back to her team. "Guys! Wake up! Wander, someone's in trouble! Uh... Hater, you received the award for... the deadliest jumble of bones in the galaxy!"
"Yay..." The skeleton lord cheered sleepily, before proceeding to suck his thumb and snuggle beside Draykor. The fallen king simply held him like a teddy bear in response.
Sylvia shook Wander's shoulders again, debating on whether she needed to slap him or not. "Wander, please wake up!"
A buzzing sound came from Wander's pendant, and then Sylvia heard the melodic voice of Princess Demura from the necklace. "Um... I am awake, Wander. Why does your voice sound funny? Is everything okay? I've been trying to find you and tell you that - "
"It's Sylvia. Some cat named Little Bits made everyone but me fall asleep and -"
Sylvia heard the princess huff and sigh irritably. "It's Dominator's work. Listen to me; shake the necklace, and I will do what I can." Sylvia obeyed, and sparkly pepper poured out from the pendant, raining down on the fallen four.
"You're lucky," Demura told her morosely. "In five minutes, they would've been hers to control."
"Baloney!" Sylvia cried. "She looked and acted just like an ordinary kitten. What's her deal?"
"Her cute eyes seem harmless and temptingly soothing to the senses," the kind princess explained patiently. "But they're deadly. Some cats like her have been enslaving thousands for ages." Right after Demura said that, everyone else slowly but surely woke up.
"W-What happened?" Wander inquired.
"Sylvia and I helped you and your friends," Demura replied from the pendant. "And now, I must go." But right after her presence left the pendant, Demura remembered something drastic. Unfortunately, it was too late.
"Crap." No one said princesses couldn't cuss on their own time.
As soon as Dominator witnessed her hunter's failure and Demura's intrusion, she told some of her robots to fetch Little Bits. Once they arrived, she unceremoniously began destroying a bunch of them carelessly and violently.
"That prissy, intervening wench! Who does she think she is?! Waving her magic in everyone else's business?!"
Kitty hesitantly cleared her throat and sidled over to Dominator. "I - I still get paid though, wight, your evilness?"
"Aw..." Dominator crooned and pet the tiny kitten on the head. But then, she outstretched her left hand and froze Little Bits.
"NOOO! Take her away!" Her robots obeyed and dragged the shivering, frozen kitten to a prison cell. "And when she thaws, clean up the water and dump it on her head! Maybe that'll teach her not to disappoint me."
Truly, the notorious villainess was greatly disappointed. She had wanted that hat ever since she was little, and it was left in the hands of a random, philanthropic star nomad. The thought of that bumpkin wearing what was rightfully hers, the most powerful hat in the galaxy no less, made Dominator's blood boil and veins pop.
"Oh well... Demura will get what's coming to her later. For now..." Dominator plopped down on her swivel chair and turned to her computer. "I need my hat, and I need it now. Computer! Show me galactic footage of that wandering weirdo and his lame friends." The computer did so, but Dominator was unimpressed. "Closer." What she saw made her giggle until it hurt. "Shut up! I didn't even recognize him before! Lord Hater, that big, babbling, idiotic baby is helping those losers? How fitting."
She stretched and rolled her eyes at all the stupidity. "Whatevs. The kid doesn't know how the hat works anyway, so he won't really be hard to catch -"
"Wow, guys!" Wander marveled the inside of the hat. "My left hand is on another planet! Now it's here! Now it's there! Now it's here! Now it's there! Here! There! Here! There! Here! There! Here! There!"
"If that hat can do that, why can't it take us all to the wizard?" Draykor mused wisely. Everyone else perked up and nodded.
"Yeah!"
"Right!"
"Of course!"
"Then what in this entire galaxy are we waiting for?"
"Great idea, Draykor!" Wander praised before giving the hat a modest look. "Uh... may we go to where the wizard Major Threat is, please?" The hat revealed their destination, and Wander hopped right inside of it. Then, his four friends hopped into the hat, too, all mysteriously sliding into the hat with no trouble.
Dominator stared at the projection for a few more moments with twitchy eyes. Then, she uttered, "I'm calm" multiple times. Even her robots, who obviously lacked empathy, were programmed to show a little concern when their creator happened to malfunction and repeat phrases like a madwoman.
"Ma'am - "
"I AM FINE!" She blasted a poor robot at the wrong place and time. Then, she smoothed down her choppy white hair and stomped into the kitchen. "I'm gonna make myself some tea, eat some cookie dough, and destroy a few dozen planets. Do NOT disturb me... unless you'd like being a useless pile of demolished junk."
