Chapter 11: More Than You Think You Are

Hannibal Lecter took a chance that she might have come home finally from her family emergency, and drove past Clarice's townhouse. To his relief, he saw lights shining brightly within and he smiled. 'Ah, now things can get back to normal,' he thought. 'My little starling's come home.'

He did a U-turn and parked his Jaguar just down the street. He looked at the dashboard clock. It was early, only 9 pm. He turned off the engine and frowned. It could be hours before she retired to bed. He did not want to sit here that long, he was too restless tonight. In her absence, his ever-growing desire to be near her and knowing he could not because she was gone had driven him nearly mad. 'Well, madder than I am already,' he smiled. He thought that perhaps he could sneak into her home a bit early and just watch her. But that would be extremely risky.

Now as he debated whether he should enter her home now or wait, he watched the shadows behind her curtains and realized he could make out two figures. He recognized Clarice's immediately but the second seemed to be a man's silhouette. Instantly, suspicion flared within him. Who was in there with her? Was their encounter purely professional in nature or was it more personal? His heart dropped as he thought that he might have to endure another lover. His obsession with her had increased to the point where he did not think he could do that anymore.

His decision made, Lecter opened his car door and stepped out. He pulled his coat up around his face to keep the cold out and strode across the street, his eyes never leaving Clarice's windows. He reached her gate and let himself in. Lecter slinked around the back of the house to the rear door. As luck would have it, all of the lights at the back of the home were out. Lecter managed to get the back door open rather easily and snuck through, walking carefully and quietly as he went. He walked through her darkened kitchen and made his way toward the door to the living room. He heard music playing and recognized one of Clarice's favorite newer groups; Matchbox 20.

Once inside, he heard Clarice laugh. "You didn't," she said, her voice filled with delight.

"What can I say, I was young and stupid. I did."

Lecter stopped dead in his tracks. He would know that voice anywhere and in any lifetime. It was the voice of his most hated rival, his nemesis, former FBI agent and current drug addict Will Graham. Then he heard Clarice laugh again and the sound was music to his ears. He closed his eyes and pictured her happy, bright, laughing face.

"You're such an idiot, Will," Clarice laughed.

Will laughed too. "I know, I know. What can I say? I was 13 and thought I was hot shit and I really, really wanted to impress her so did it. I stood up in the middle of the cafeteria and belted out 'You Are So Beautiful' by Kenny Rogers."

Clarice laughed even harder, clutching her stomach. "And was Jennifer impressed?"

"No," Will laughed. "She was so embarrassed that she never uttered a single word to me again."

'What the HELL is he doing here?' Lecter opened his eyes, clenched his fists, and moved forward.

He knelt in the doorway of the kitchen and peered carefully into the living room, being sure to stay in the shadows. They were sitting on the couch, Clarice sat cross-legged facing Will on one end and Will sat at the other end, his arm draped on the back of the couch casually, his shoeless feet propped on her coffee table. Lecter spied two .45's and two FBI ID's and badges on the coffee table as well and a manila case file. In addition, there was an open pizza box and cans of soda, diet for her he knew, littering the table as well.

Lecter smiled at the sight of Clarice. 'Oh, it's been too long, my love,' he thought. 'You've been away far too long.'

He noticed she was clad in his favorite pajama combo, her tan loose-fitting bottoms and the black skin tight tank top. She had piled her hair on top of her head with a gold clip and a few strands hung around her face. Then he glared at the back of Will's head and saw he had gotten his hair cut and was wearing a white dress shirt and dress pants.

'Odd,' Lecter mused. 'The last time I checked up on Will he seemed to be permanently inebriated. How has he suddenly cleaned up? And what is he doing with her, a gun, and an FBI ID and badge?'

All of a sudden, Lecter put two and two together. 'Oh my God,' he thought. 'She did not have a family emergency. She went away to help Will get clean so she could bring him in to catch me.'

Lecter's eyes narrowed to slits as he watched the two of them, his beauty and his beast, sitting, laughing, talking, as if they were old chums. This was not a good development at all. 'No, not at all,' he thought as he continued to clench and unclench his fists. He was going to have to rectify this situation.



Clarice rolled over onto her back and sighed heavily. She turned to look at the digital clock on the bedside table. It was just after 2 am. She stared at the ceiling and analyzed why she could not go to sleep. She had been attempting to sleep ever since Will had left about two hours ago. Since she had driven them here this afternoon, she let him take her car home and he would pick her up in the morning on his way in. Clarice remembered watching him back out of the garage. He had rolled down the window and smiled.

"I'm not leaving 'till I see you go in and lock up."

Clarice had smiled. "Good night Will."

"Good night. Dream some sweet dreams tonight. Not the usual ones we have, okay?"

"I'll try," she had smiled again. "You, too." She turned and walked into the house.

Now as she lay in bed and watched the headlights from a passing car sweep across her ceiling, she felt mixed emotions as she recalled the day's events.

She and Will had had a busy day. After their morning collaborations, Kendra Mitchell had summoned the two of them to her office. She had met with each of them separately, Will first then Clarice. On his way into her office, Will had joked, "Shit I hope the principal doesn't give us detention." Clarice had laughed heartily. She had been in a great mood this morning. That had all changed quickly. When it had been her turn to enter the dragon's lair, Will had walked out, shaking his head. Clarice had entered Kendra's office and awaited her verbal lashing. Indeed, Kendra was overly cold and cruel to Clarice.

"You deliberately disobeyed an order from your Superior, Clarice," Kendra had said coolly. "And then you disappear for a week? That is unacceptable."

"I'm sorry," Clarice had stated simply.

Kendra had raised her eyebrows at Clarice's response. "That's it?" she asked. "Aren't you going to argue with me or try to rationalize your actions or something?"

"No," Clarice had replied quietly. "There would be no point."

Kendra had smiled evenly and Clarice thought, 'Bitch.'

Kendra's demeanor had changed and she sat down on the edge of her desk next to Clarice amicably as if trying to be pals all of a sudden. "He's quite charming isn't he?"

"Who?"

"Who?" Kendra had repeated incredulously. "Your new partner, that's who. Graham's rather smooth and charming. And damn does he look good in those pants." She had smiled broadly, paused and looked directly at Clarice. "After he's caught Lecter, I'll have to take him out so he and I can celebrate." She had smirked at Clarice.

Clarice had known her boss was just trying to get a rise out of her and she'd be damned if she would give her the pleasure. Still, Clarice had felt her blood beginning to boil. She absolutely loathed this woman. "I beg your pardon, Kendra, but Will and I will be bringing Dr. Lecter in together."

"You've been working for five years to bring him in and you've failed, Clarice. The way I see it, Agent Graham is here to save your ass." Kendra had smiled coldly and Clarice had remembered Seth's innocent words about the possibility of Will being her savior. "Just be sure you let him do his thing and stay out of his way so he can find Lecter," Kendra had continued. "Don't get your claws into him and fuck him up Clarice." She had smiled coldly. "That's gonna be my job when this case is finished."

Clarice had remained silent but her rage threatened to boil over. The two women had stared at each other with utter contempt for a while. Clarice was sick of being abused by her boss. She made a decision.

"Kendra," she had finally said quietly, "when this case is closed, I will be turning in my badge."

Kendra had smiled brightly. "Why don't you turn it in now Clarice? Face it, you're washed up. You can't do this job any more. You haven't been able to do it well for quite awhile now."

Clarice had taken a deep breath. "I will not abandon Will," she said simply.

Kendra had snorted. "He doesn't need your help."

Clarice had sat there silent and unmoving. She had turned her head slightly to gaze out the window as she attempted to calm her inner rage. She would not let this woman get the best of her. "Is there another purpose to this meeting or are we finished?" Clarice had asked, looking back at her boss.

"We're finished Clarice," Kendra had smiled coolly again. "Just remember what I said, leave him alone and don't fuck him up."

Clarice had exited quickly and stormed out of the office. She saw that Will had waited for her, he had been chatting with one of the secretaries. He had looked up, saw Clarice, and frowned. She had raced passed him, hoping he would continue his conversation. Instead he had fallen into step beside her as she had made her way to the stairwell and not the elevator. Clarice had slammed open the door and instead of heading back up in the direction of her office, she had headed down.

"Clarice, what happened?" Will had asked, concerned. "What did she say?"

"Leave me alone Will, okay?" Clarice had grumbled and continued her hurried descent.

Will had grabbed her arm and forced her to turn and face him. "Would you stop and talk to me? What happened?"

Clarice had looked up at him and he could see the beginnings of tears although she was working desperately to hold them back. "I'm gonna lose it and I don't want you to see me," she had said and had turned to head back down the stairs.

Will had retained his grip on her arm so she could not retreat. "Clarice," he had said gently. "You've seen me at my worst and you were there for me. Now I'm here for you. I'm your partner now, don't shut me out."

At his words, Clarice's tears had finally come. He had put his arms around her and enveloped her in a big hug. Her tears had soaked his shirt. They had stood like that in the stairwell until her tears had stopped. She had looked up at him with her red eyes and tear stained face.

"I'm sorry," she had whispered huskily.

"It's okay."

"I'm sorry I got your shirt all wet."

"I don't give a shit, it's easily washed," he had smiled. "Now, tell me what happened."

Clarice had taken his hand. "I've gotta get out of this building. Let's go outside."

Once outside he had listened carefully as she had talked and paced. Clarice had told him everything that Kendra had said and everything that she had felt and said. When she had finished, Will shook his head.

"Damn that woman. She's certainly in a class all her own."

"Now you understand why Seth and I nicknamed her the Devil incarnate." She smiled wanly. "How did your meeting with her go?" Clarice had asked.

Will shrugged and put his hands in his pockets. "Are you cold?" He had asked. "Cuz if you're cold I'll run up and get your jacket if you want."

"No, thanks, I'm fine." Clarice closed her eyes and tilted her head up to feel the sun's warm rays on her face. "The sun feels good this morning."

Will had smiled as he watched her soak up the sun's late autumn rays. "So what are you planning on doing when we're done with this case since you're gonna quit?"

Clarice had looked at him. "I don't know. Maybe I'll try to get on at Quantico."

Will had nodded. "That'd be good. We could teach there together then."

"You're gonna teach there?"

"Well I've had a standing invitation there for about the last 20 years," he had shrugged. "Maybe it's time I took 'em up on their offer."

Clarice had smiled. "So what happened in your meeting with Kendra?" She had asked quietly.

"Damn, I was hoping you would forget about that."

"Come on, partner, tell me. I mean it couldn't have been as bad as mine, she loves you."

"I noticed," Will had sighed. "She just went on and on about how I was the savior of the department and ego-stroking bullshit like that. Oh and she also told me that if there was anything at all I needed to be sure and let her know personally." Will had shaken his head. "Then she started in about you."

"What'd she say?"

"She kept saying how incompetent you'd become and shit like that."

"I see," Clarice had whispered.

"And then I asked her how if you were so incompetent you were smart enough to resurrect what she considers to be the department's 'savior' and she wasn't," Will had said quietly. "She didn't have a response for that."

Clarice had chuckled. "I hate that woman."

"She's definitely a piece of work. And you were totally right on when you said she'd be kind to Hitler if she thought he could help her out on this case. I mean with all the bullshit compliments she was giving me, damn, I haven't been told shit like that since the time I made Molly go a week without sex and she finally resorted to flattery to get me to give it up." He chuckled. "I tell you though, Kendra's sure got a hard on for catching Lecter." He had paused. "Oh, excuse the rude phrase."

"It's fine," she had smiled. "Yup, Kendra sure does. You're so mean, though, withholding sex from your wife."

Will had laughed. "No, no, it was a bet. See she bet me that I couldn't go a day without..um, you know what, never mind." He had blushed.

This time it was Clarice who had laughed. "You better watch out though, Kendra was saying she's going to take you out to celebrate when you solve the case."

Will had looked at her and omitted the fact that Ms. Mitchell had flat out come on to him in her office. He had smiled. "Well, when we solve this case, you and I will have to go out and celebrate. Kendra Mitchell be damned."

Clarice had smiled. "You're too good to me, Will."

"No," he had paused. "I just know class when I see it and you deserve so much better than the FBI has given you."

"We both do." Clarice had sighed and looked up at the building. She now viewed it as a prison, a prison where she had served too long of a sentence. She had felt as if she could not step foot back into the building anymore that day so Will had gone back upstairs, gathered up the case file and they had gone back to her townhouse to work. Clarice had lit a fire to take the chill out of the room, changed into her favorite lounging clothes: comfortable pajama bottoms and a black tank top and Will had taken off his tie, his shoes, and rolled up his sleeves. But instead of working, the two of them had ordered a pizza and spent the rest of the afternoon talking. They had talked about their childhoods, their training at Quantico, their hopes and dreams, their experiences with Jack Crawford, their families, everything except what they should have been discussing: Hannibal Lecter.

Now in bed, Clarice shook her head. She could not get the image of Will's smile out of it. Clarice felt so comfortable around him and she felt she could tell him anything. Hell, she had even let him see her cry and she never let anyone but Ardelia see her cry. They had spent every day together for nine days now and already they had been through quite a bit together. They had learned to let their guards down and trust each other. Clarice had not felt that with a man since her father.

Clarice smiled and felt tingly all over. She groaned. 'What is wrong with me?' she thought. 'I'm acting like a damn school girl with a crush.'

She rolled over on her side and looked at the clock again. 2:45 am.

"Ugh," she said out loud. "He's your partner, let it go. You're being ridiculous."

She closed her eyes and began to drift off to sleep again when the phone rang. She jumped, startled and grabbed it on the second ring. Phone calls in the dead of night were never good news and she was suddenly fearful.

"Hello?" She asked.

"Clarice I need you to talk to me. Just talk to me about anything, okay?"

"Will?" Clarice asked. "What's wrong? What is it?"

She heard him sigh shakily. "Remember when you told me that I should call you instead of my dealer? Well I am. So please, I need you to talk to me. About anything, it doesn't matter. Tell me more about your father or something."

"Alright," Clarice lay in her bed in the dark and talked into the phone.

Had she looked into the dark shadows against the left side of her room, she might have seen her predator and her prey sitting in the corner, clenching and unclenching his fists.



To be continued. Please review!

florence: Thank you so much for your continued support. More to come soon.

Nan: It's funny that you comment on the conversation regarding the GD between Will and Clarice because I think I rewrote that whole section about five times before I was satisfied with it. Besides, I figured if anyone would understand her mixed feelings about him, Will would. Thanks again for reading and reviewing.

Shattered Mug: You and I have already discussed this review on Lecterphiles!! What can I say, but thanks. You're the best. And you know I always appreciate your reviews.

Kurt: Thanks for your great review. While the Clarice/GD fans haven't quite taken up arms against me, I have received a few insistent reviews on the subject of Will and Clarice. Thanks for the kudos on the Will/Clarice scenes. I slave over these damn chapters! Yes, Will is much happier isn't he? In all my research and talking to people who've gone through the same kind of thing, that seemed to be a universal feeling, the feeling of re- birth almost after addiction so I tried to portray Will that way. No, Zachary is not quite as stable as our pal, the GD. Look for more from him later. Thanks as always for your wonderful review.

LoT: Yes, we'll see a bit more from young Zachary. Well, you got a little GD jealousy in this chapter and you'll have to keep reading to see if there is going to be more! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing.

EyeSeeU: Yes, Zachary seems to intrigue most of you and we will see more from him soon. I'm so glad that most everyone enjoyed the conversation between Will and Clarice, I spent days and many rewrites on that conversation alone! Thank you so much for your great review. PS: That is one of my favorite lines too!

luna: Thank you for reading and reviewing. Everyone seems to be very interested in Zach!! I know the Clarice line of thinking is a bit off, but ah well. Thanks again.