Thank you once again for your kind words for the previous one-shots. This one is an emotional journey for Sharon. It takes place right after Andy collapses in White Lies Part 3. I've been looking forward to the show's return next month, so I decided to explore some of the emotions Sharon might have felt between that ending and the second half of the season. As always, I welcome your feedback and thoughts.
I do not own Major Crimes or any of the fabulous characters. That honor belongs to James Duff and co. I just enjoy writing about them.
Shattered
He said he'd never leave her.
He said he wanted to build a future together with her.
Then why did he keep trying to remove himself from her life?
That wasn't fair and she knew it. If Andy had his way, he certainly wouldn't be lying in a hospital bed right now. He wouldn't have suffered that "dust up with the car" or the resulting blood clot that led to life-saving surgery less than a year ago. Although, part of her was inclined to assign at least a small amount of the blame to him. What was he thinking jumping onto that car? But this, this was different. It wasn't his fault, but it felt good to have someone to blame even if it was the man her heart was breaking over. The man she'd given that heart to many months earlier.
Shattered glass surrounded her as she kneeled on the floor of her condo. Her soft sobs the only sound in the empty space. For the most part, she'd been able to keep it together after Andy collapsed in the murder room. She swallowed her anguish as she rode in the ambulance and whispered reassuring words into his ear. She put on her best professional face as she waited for word in the hospital waiting room. After all, if she didn't keep it together for the small group that had gathered there, then who would?
She stayed strong in the car with Julio as he gave her a ride back to the PAB so she could get her car. The doctor had informed them that Andy was stable and resting comfortably. She wanted to run home and get him some of his own clothes so he'd be more comfortable. It wasn't entirely necessary, but she wasn't allowed to see him yet, and she couldn't take the sympathetic, concerned looks from family and co-workers. She had politely excused herself to run home and get a few things for Andy, but she was sure they all knew the real reason she was leaving.
She hadn't planned on breaking down, but seeing the shards of broken glass lying on her floor was too much of a metaphor and the carefully constructed dam she had built started to crack. In the center of all of that broken glass lay a photo of the two of them in happier times. It was a candid picture taken during a get together with Andy's family over the summer. They were both smiling at each other. It was Sharon's favorite photo of them, and she had managed to shatter its glass frame into a million tiny pieces.
She hadn't meant to, of course. When she had come into the condo to get a few things for Andy, she noticed his favorite coffee cup still sitting on their dining room table, and it distracted her. A memory flooded her mind. They had left in a rush that morning, running late after spending a little too much time together in the shower. Andy had coaxed her in there with him under the guise of saving time. She, of course, knew better, but obliged him anyway. In between long, passionate kisses and sensual, intimate touches, they managed to wash and rinse off. By the time they made it out for breakfast, their time was limited.
As she recalled the pleasant memory, she tossed her bag towards her couch, but her eyes were still focused on that forgotten mug. She didn't see the angle until it was too late, and her bag launched right into the glass framed photo on her end table knocking it to the floor and smashing it into pieces. She heard the shards scatter across her living room before she rounded the couch. Dropping to the floor, she allowed herself to finally breakdown. To finally feel all of the fear, anger, anxiety, and sadness she had been carrying since seeing the man she loved slump to the floor of the murder room.
Now, she was trying to pick up the pieces. The pieces of the shattered frame. Of her heart. Of her life after once again almost losing the man who owned a big piece of it. As she carefully swept the sharp bits of glass into the dustpan, she leaned over and picked up the photo. She stared at it for a moment. It was completely intact. Not a scratch on it. She allowed herself a watery smile before taking a cleansing breath. The frame was a total loss, but the most important part was untouched. It gave her hope. It filled her with relief.
Later when she returned to the hospital, Andy was awake and finally able to have visitors. She quickly made her way through the hospital corridors until she found his room. She knocked and entered slowly. He greeted her with a sleepy grin, so she took a seat in the chair near his bed after placing his bag of things she'd packed on the small table off to the side of the room. He reached out and took her hand in his. She smiled.
"Hey," he greeted her a bit groggy still. She squeezed his hand.
"How are you feeling?" She asked, concern evident.
"Like I had a heart attack," he deadpanned. Sharon didn't look amused, so he tried to reassure her. "I'm fine, honey. Just tired," he added.
"Andy, you did have a heart attack. You could have..." she trailed off. He tried to sit up to get closer to her, but found the movement more difficult than he expected. She quickly moved to help him.
"I'm going to be fine. Doc says it was just a minor event. No long-term damage. Just have to adjust my meds and tweak my diet a bit. No big deal," he assured her. She scoffed.
"No big deal? Andy, you collapsed... I thought... you looked so...," she said trying, but failing, to keep her emotions in check. He felt like a right idiot when he saw her pained expression.
"So maybe that wasn't the best choice of words," he apologized. "I know this was scary for you. Hell, it scared me! But the good news is, it looked worse than it was. Everything is okay, and doc says I'll make a full recovery," he said sincerely. She nodded while fighting back the tears that filled her eyes.
"I know. We got lucky. But, Andy, I thought I was going to lose you and... I don't want to lose you," she said, voice quiet and laced with emotion. He used her hand to tug her close and she carefully followed his lead. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly.
"I told you I wouldn't leave you, and I'm going to do everything in my power to keep that promise," he whispered into her hair. She backed out of his embrace only to bring her lips to his. They shared a sweet kiss that held the weight of their feelings and the emotion of everything that had happened. When they regretfully broke apart, Sharon sat back down in the chair next to his bed and studied him a moment.
"Including following your doctor's orders to the letter?" she asked knowingly. He couldn't help but smile at her.
"Yes," he replied. She raised an eyebrow in doubt.
"Andy, this is serious. You need to do exactly what your doctor says or we're going to end up right back here. Except next time, you may not be as lucky-" she began, but Andy took her hand in his and quickly interrupted.
"I promise, Sharon. I love you. And now that I've found this amazing thing with you, I don't want to lose it and I certainly don't want to lose you," he assured her. That seemed to ease her concern slightly. "I have a lot to live for, so I don't plan on going anywhere anytime soon".
"Good, because I'm not ready to let you go," she said with a concerned smile.
"Well, then, you're stuck with me," he said around his own smile. She leaned over and placed a chaste kiss to his lips.
"Wouldn't want it any other way," she assured him before retaking her seat. She sat beside him as he slowly drifted off to sleep, a small smile playing on his lips. Relief flooded her and the weight of the day slowly began to lift itself from her shoulders. Things may have felt shattered, but they were picking up the pieces together. And most importantly, the most meaningful part, the man she loved, was still intact. He wasn't going anywhere yet, and that was all she really needed anyway.
THE END
