AN: Thank you to the very small selective group that read and review this.
A thank you to ShineBrightGranger for running her skilled eye over this for me.
"Focus Bella,"I tried again, "Picture it, see it there, protecting your mind. Give it a colour, a texture. It's part of you."
We were sat in the middle of the training room, with Jane, while I tried to get Bella to actually see her shield. There was some hope that if she saw it, she might be able to use it. In the two or so months since her change, she hadn't managed to use it. Jane had tried different techniques to get her to feel her pain; I had tried different techniques to get her to actually see it. Nothing was working.
Jane had been disappointed when Bella had woken and she discovered that even as a newborn, she had some level of control of her gift.
"I'm trying too!" Bella stressed.
"Bella, it's ingrained into you. It's a part of you, just like your hair. That has a colour, a texture to it. You need to see this shield as the same thing." Running my hand through my hair, I sighed. "Close your eyes, and see it. What did Demetri say to you about his gift?"
"It's like a sonar. That's how he see's it. A dot in a direction, that gets bigger the closer it gets." Bella replied, a small smile dancing on her lips as she thought about her mate, her hand going up and touching her mating mark.
Her emotions went haywire. A contradiction of emotions slammed into me, making my head spin. The pull to Demetri was almost overwhelming, mixing with lust and a sheer drive to mate. Those emotions, ones that should be the most prominent to a newly mated vampire, were warring against her love for Edward. How she felt ashamed that she had been with another, and the betrayal that came with it.
I had really hoped that she would listen to me, but she hadn't. By not listening, she had created a toxic bond that was slowly destroying what should be amazing. If they didn't sort it out, if she didn't sort out her feelings, I feared Demetri would soon start to hate her and refuse their bond. Something that was extremely rare for vampires.
Shaking my head, I couldn't help but feel for Demetri. He was suffering, and badly. The threads of love were there for him, and every time I had seen him with her, I had felt his pain growing. He continually got mixed signals off Bella. Her instinct took over time and time again, and he allowed it to happen. In a sense, he was as much to blame as Bella was. He was the older vampire, the one that was no longer governed by those newborn instincts. If anyone should have put a stop to their mating, it should have been him. It wasn't like he didn't know what she was feeling or suffering, yet he had decided to go ahead and create that bond.
"Bella!" I snapped, feeling her emotions crash as her eyes snapped open.
"Sorry," she said, looking down.
She knew my view on it, and how I thought she was stupid for going ahead with it and not listening. But Bella thought she knew best. I guess experience doesn't register with an eighteen-year-old.
"It's okay, but let's focus and sort this out. We really need to start upping this now. Aro is expecting this gift to start working." Jane looked at me, rolling her eyes.
She was bored. Sitting around, trying her power now and then to see if he could get through to Bella. Jane had even tried shocking me, but that hadn't worked either. We had hoped that because Bella knew me along with our Sire bond, that maybe it might kick it in, but it had failed. Then again we had only tried it the once, and she was only a few weeks old at the time.
I was up for trying it again, but Caius, on the other hand, wasn't. When Caius had found out, he had blown a gasket of epic proportion. Something that I knew he would do if he had found out. I wasn't sure how he had found out what we had done, but he did, and Jane paid for it.
Jane had been found in bits scattered across the corridor from his attack.
Jane hadn't even been aware that she was suddenly at the top of his hit list when he had struck. She hadn't been summoned to the training ground, she hadn't even been asked to the throne room. Caius had found her in the corridor and done it there and then, moving that fast that she didn't even get a chance to defend herself.
I could only assume that he had found out and acted straight away, not giving it time to set in. Which was probably for the best. Jane was well aware just how sadistic Caius could be, and if had time to think about what he would do, she would have suffered worse. After that, Jane had been slightly weary of Caius for a few days, not wishing to trigger him off again.
It had caused a massive fight between us, with him going as far as ordering me, as King, not to do it again. I could understand where he was coming from, but it wasn't as though I hadn't suggested it, or suffered worse before. Though, if it had been the other way around, I would have acted the same.
Bella had become somewhat fond of Jane, in a weird sorta way. They weren't besties, and I doubted they ever would be, but because Jane had spent the last few weeks training with us, they had formed some kind of friendship bond. When Bella had found out about Jane being ripped apart, Bella had taken a slight hatred towards Caius, even though Jane had reassured her she was fine and it was an acceptable punishment for harming a King's mate.
"Why don't you go, Jane?" Jane sprang to her feet, smiling. "Don't look too happy to go," I smirked.
"This," She waved her hand, "is boring. Watching paint dry is more fun." Jane disappeared in a blink of an eye, the door to the training ground gently closing behind her.
"It's never going to work is it?" Bella whined. "No matter how many times I try, or picture, or try to feel. It's faulty!"
"It's not faulty, Bella. You're still young and learning. We'll crack it," I tried to reassure her, but I doubted it did much good.
"But you must be bored? Jane is, I don't need your power to know she bored." Bella crossed her legs, resting her right elbow on her knee, her cheek in her hand. "Nothing is working. Demetri keeps trying. I know he's getting pissed off that I can't unlock it."
"Bella, gifts take years and years to perfect. To train, to figure out how it works. No one wakes up with a gift and knows all its ins and outs. Demetri isn't pissed off because you can't crack it, he's pissed off because you expect it to happen now." My fingers drummed on the floor, trying to work out how we could actually crack this. "Everything takes time. Just because you're a vampire doesn't necessarily mean you only need to see it once. Just relax."
"Easy for you to say. You've got your gift all worked out." Bella grumbled out as I chuckled. "It's not funny!"
"You're two months old, I'm over a hundred. I've had more time to work my gift out, but I don't know it all. The older I get, the stronger things get, the better the range, the more emotions I can throw at once. Things take time, and you have all the time in the world."
"Thanks…" She said dryly. "Demetri says I should be well fed while training."
"You should be, it's amazing how fast these things can drain you if you're not careful. I assume he's taking you to feed every couple of days?" I asked, watching as she looked away from me.
Since she mated with Demetri, I had taken a step back and let him look after her. Making sure she was well fed, filling her in on our vampire life. She came to me for training and not much else, but every so often I felt compelled to ask certain things.
"Bella?" I pressed, feeling her feeling guilty.
"I hate it, Jasper." She whispered, keeping her eyes away from me. "I always thought I would be like the Cullens, feed on animals, not humans," She looked at me, the pleading in her eyes already there. "Please, Jasper. I want to see the king's about this."
"It won't be granted, I've already spoken to Caius about it, darlin'," I told her.
"But surely, with Carlisle…"
"It's not normal to feed the way the Cullen's do," I cut her off. "Carlisle was a different game, he wasn't part of this coven, you are."
"But I don't want to feed off humans!" She growled out.
Pushing a load of calm her way, I waited for her to calm down before continuing. "It's not filling, it's not satisfying, plus, it really doesn't taste that nice." Bella snorted at me, shooting me an accusing glare.
"You used to eat animal's, Jasper. Don't give me this crap."
"I'm giving you the truth. It's not nice, it's really not satisfying, and I had to switch for two reasons. One, I had to fit in with them, and two I didn't have Caius with me. I find it hard to feed at the best of times, the emotions..." A shudder rippled its way through me. "Get to me."
"If it's so hard for you then maybe you should go back to eating animals."
"Oh yeah, because that'll go down well with Caius. He thinks it's warped, denying ourselves like that, suppressing what we are. I could just see how that convo will go." I rolled my eyes at her. "Besides, I enjoy human blood a hell of a lot more."
"If he hates it so much then how did he handle you on the animal blood?" Bella stated, raising an eyebrow at me.
"He ignored it." I shrugged, "It was part of means, Bella. "
"He ignored it?" She questioned. "You've just told me he thinks it's warped but happily ignored it for you?"
"I'm not liking where this is heading, Bella," I growled lowly. "I never said he was happy about it, I said he ignored it. There's a difference. Think what you will about him, but he does understand when it comes to me and my gift."
"Sorry," she whispered, "I shouldn't have made out that he doesn't care when it comes to you."
"But it's what you think," I snapped, pinning her with a stare. "You're starting to really piss me off with it. Just because you see one side of him, doesn't mean that's how he is all the time. It's not how he is with me."
Bella huffed at me, but thankfully let the subject drop.
"Can we talk about something else? Anything else?" Bella almost pleaded with me.
"Sure. Wanna talk about what happened?" I asked, letting out a breath. "Or at least what you remember?" Bella looked at me, pain covered her briefly before she pushed it away.
"I don't really remember much," She mumbled, looking down. "I know it hurt me, but I can't remember the finer points of it. Demetri tries to help me remember, but I think that's only for his own gain than anything else."
"Bella, he wants to know because he knows it hurt you. It's a part of mateship. He wants to remove that pain and cause pain to the person who caused it. You'll get used to it." I offered as she frowned.
"It's all so confusing!" Bella said frustratedly. "I can't seem to keep my hands off him, but I know deep down . . . that pain is there."
"You're governed by your instincts, your emotions now. Things won't always make sense, your vampire won't always make sense. Your vampire knows Demetri is yours, but you, yourself, are struggling because of that pain that is still there. It'll settle and they combine over time. Letting go of Edward will help." I offered, seeing her not so sure by my words.
"Will they? Because right now, I can't see it happening." She grumbled. "I would like to go a day and not feel so out of control with everything."
It didn't escape my attention that she ignored my comment about Edward. Bella clearly didn't want to talk about him again and have to listen to being told that she needed to let him go. It was something we had covered many times, and she hated it every time we did. Personally, I knew she just wanted me to tell her to go to Edward. It was what she was hoping for, deep down.
"Newborn." I smirked. "This is the reality of becoming what we are, Bella, you should have listened a little more when you were human."
"If it hadn't of happened... if he was….would I still feel like this?" She whispered ashamed, looking down.
"You would still be confused, Bella. More so. You found your mate here. If Edward hadn't of left, and you continued on your path and he turned you, things would be different. You would hate him." I told her honestly. "He made you believe you were his, his mate, those pulling feelings wouldn't be there. You, just like him, would have realized you were both wrong. I know you coming here wasn't what you had in mind, but you found Demetri."
"I guess…" She trailed. "I should be happy I've got him."
"You really should be," I remarked. "Besides, I've repaid my debt to Demetri, even if it's very fucked up."
Bella looked at me, her brow knitted in confusion. "What do you mean, paid your debt?" There was a slight edge to her voice, almost like she felt like she had been tricked to get here.
"Chill Bella," I warned, feeling her emotions starting to rise up rapidly. "But, I owed Demetri a debt. It's not how you think it is, he's the reason I found Caius."
"What? You mean if it wasn't for Demetri, you two wouldn't have met?"
"Pretty much, yeah." I smirked, "I ran into Demi and here we are now."
"There's more to it than that, Jasper." Bella looked at me, questions filling her eyes. "Tell me?"
"Want me to tell you about your least favourite person?" I snorted a laugh.
"He scares me, Jasper." She whispered, then looked shocked she had just said that. "Please don't say anything."
"Why? He'll take it as a compliment, Bella, trust me." I smirked as she narrowed her eyes at me.
"Doubt that, he hates me," she whispered so low that I almost missed it. "Tell me then, because I really don't see how you two work. Your nice and he's….." She trailed off noticing my raised eyebrow, wondering how she was going to end that last line.
When Bella decided not to continue her line of thought, and her emotions had settled themselves to a point where she wasn't going to snap and allow them to get the better of her, I told her.
"You know I've mentioned the southern wars to you, and that's where I came from. Well, not long after Peter told me about this new life in the north, I ran into Demetri. He and a few others were sweeping through the south, making sure that covens were behaving themselves. Anyways, we got talking and he said I should come check out Italy with being at a loss of what to do with myself. So, me, Peter and Charlotte thought why not, and here we are."
"That's it?" Bella looked disappointed. Guess she expected some other story.
"Don't seem so surprised Bella," I shrugged, "What were you expecting?"
"Something more than that." She grumbled. "I guess, I just assumed that there was more to it, you know?" There was, but I wasn't about to tell her.
It was in the past, and it was a hell of a long time ago.
"Some love story?" I chuckled. "Bella, neither one of us ever expected to find our mates in another man. It was a shock to the system, a massive one. We met, we fought and we came together. That's pretty much it Bella." I smiled. "If I hadn't of taken Demetri up on his offer of coming here, I would have never of met him."
"You love him don't you?" Bella asked softly. "I can see it when you talk about him. It's in your eyes."
"No him, no me." I answered honestly. Loving him was an understatement. He meant the world and even more to me. Even if he was temperamental with a few sadistic tendencies.
"You'll feel that with Demetri at some point,"
"It's one-sided, though." she said sadly
"It shouldn't be, Bella. It should be an equal feeling."
"But it's not."
"Bella, you know you're still a very young vampire, still unstable. It'll come, don't feel bad about it. Demetri knows this, he understands. He's not a rookie when it comes to newborn vampires."
During Bella's time here, I had tested her emotions a few times, felt the sudden spike of longing if she caught someone mentioning the Cullens. She still loved them and had a hard time understanding why I wasn't bothered by not seeing them. It wasn't that I wasn't bothered about them anymore, I was, but they no longer registered in my priorities anymore. I didn't hold any hatred towards them, and I looked forward to seeing them again one day, but right now was not that time.
Besides, I highly doubted it would be a happy reunion once they found out that my time with them was a lie.
Bella's perception of her fantasy vampire life with a family wasn't the real perception of the reality of vampire life. She was struggling to let go of her past hopes and dreams.
I smiled, feeling Caius emotion signature heading this way, followed by Demetri's. "Demetri's on his way."
"How do you do that?" Bella asked, "You always know."
"I can sense his emotional signature before I sense him. Took me many years to figure out whose emotions were whose."
"Demetri." Bella beamed seeing her mate enter the training ground, only for her face to fall once she saw his face.
Demetri looked less than happy, in fact, dread covered his face as he smiled slightly at Bella. Clocking Caius's sadistic satisfaction, I eyed my mate, wondering what he was planning. He hadn't made a move against Demetri after his disrespect when Bella first woke up. I knew he was biding his time, and by the looks of it, he had decided now was time for his punishment.
A few seconds later, I felt Jane's signature touch my senses. Shaking my head, I realised what he was planning, though it could work out that this could be just what Bella needed to access her shield, I knew that he was doing this as punishment for Demetri's blatant disrespect.
Caius smirked as Jane re-entered the training room. She, much like Caius, had a pleased glint in their eye. It was no secret that Jane enjoyed her power, and used it whenever she could.
"The reports are saying that you still haven't even unlocked that gift, let alone mastered any form of control over it," Caius spoke, his icy red glare on Bella. "Such a shame, though it looks like I'll have to try another way." He glided towards me, smirking slightly. "Demetri."
Demetri moved into the middle of the training ground, placing a kiss on Bella's cheek as he passed. She made a play to grab his arm, but he brushed her off.
"Demetri?" She called confused by what was happening.
"You gave me an idea when you had Jane shock my mate," he smirked, "It's time to see if you can use that, shield," Caius told her, smiling as she stood up. "Jane."
Within seconds of his command, Demetri was on the floor screaming in pain. Jane wasn't messing around, she hadn't started off slowly, she had gone full power on him. Bella looked frantic, her eyes narrowing on Jane before her gaze shifted to Caius who stood on looking, a slight smirk playing his lips.
"Leave him alone!" Bella growled, making Caius raise an eyebrow at her.
"Protect him, Bella," I called out, making a move to go closer to her. Caius' arm stretched out, stopping me. Looking at him, he shook his at me. "Focus on your mate. Use that shield to block out Jane's gift."
"I can't!"
"Then he suffers." Caius snarled next to me.
"Please, Jasper, do something," Bella pleaded, looking pained.
Her eyes frantic, locked on her mate as Demetri screamed on the floor. Bella cast her panicked eyes my way, but there wasn't a lot I could do to help the situation. Demetri would continue to suffer until Bella cracked her shield or Caius grew bored.
"Pathetic," Caius sneered at her. "Weak and pathetic. You can't even protect your own mate with your gift." He tormented her.
"Please! Stop, please."
"Focus Bella, you can do this." I told her, monitoring her emotions, "You want to help him, to protect him from that pain. Take it, find the strength and protect him."
"Please, Jasper make him stop." She wasn't listening, in fact, she wasn't really doing much of anything, other than sobbing and pleading.
"I can't Bella." I sighed, shooting Caius a look as he seemed to be taking far too much satisfaction from this. "It's an effective technique, I can't argue that."
"But it's hurting for him." She pleaded.
Bella fell to her knees by her mate's side, sobbing tearless sobs as he withered and screamed on the floor. She had lost sight of everything now, almost reverting back into human mode, forgetting that she could actually protect him if she connected the dots in her mind. Demetri wasn't really in pain, he was being tricked into thinking he was, it may hurt like hell while she did it, but once she ended it, the pain disappeared. Bella knew this, yet she couldn't seem to focus on that at all.
"Protect him and the pain ends," Caius smirked, "Do not, and it continues."
"You're heartless!" she screamed at Caius. A devilish, sadistic smile on his lips, while he enjoyed the entertainment.
"Bella, Ignore him, focus on your mate, just him, no one else," I called to her as I felt Caius's breath on the back of my neck. "Concentrate, he needs you, Bella."
"She's not listening to you, Jasper." The tormenting tone continued as he spoke to me, knowing Bella could hear him. "She's not even trying."
"She's a newborn, newly mated, and her mate is in pain. She's confused, Caius." It was a weak response, I knew that that and the snicker in my ear told me he knew it too.
"All the more reason to protect her mate, wouldn't you agree?" Nodding my head, I did agree with him.
This should have kicked up her instinct to protect him, but it wasn't. She wanted to help him, but she felt powerless to do so. Instead, she was choosing to sob by his side as Jane continued to fill Demetri with a fake pain. Her emotions were haywire. She wanted to protect him, but she also wanted to attack Jane for dishing out the pain and then Caius who was enjoying this. She wouldn't stand a chance between either them. Even without her power, Jane was a skilled fighter.
Effectively, she was playing right into his hand. He wanted her to snap, to try and lunge so he could rip her apart for it. Caius made no secret of the fact he didn't like her, and the more she banged on about wanting to eat animals, the less he liked her.
"He doesn't deserve this," Bella cried, "Please just stop."
"Bella, listen to me, focus on your mate. You're too caught up on everything else." I tried again to get her to listen, but she wouldn't.
"Make him stop, please, Jasper make him stop." Bella pleaded again.
Caius chuckled at her wording. "I do love it when they beg. Makes it more entertaining."
"You're taking too much enjoyment out of this, Caius."
"That I am, my love, that I am."
"Only you can make him stop by protecting your mate, Bella." I urged, "Think about what I've told you. Try and picture it, push it out onto your mate. Remember Bella, this pain isn't real. It's all fake, he's not really hurting and once Jane pulls her powers back, he'll be fine." Bella narrowed her eyes on a smirking Jane. "Don't, you will lose."
"I think she should," he purred in my ear, "It would make this even more entertaining."
"Caius," I sighed as he chuckled beside me.
"My Lord," Felix spoke with a slight bow as he entered the training ground. "Your presence is required immediately in the throne room," Felix spoke, tipping his head towards Bella in indication as Caius narrowed his eyes at him.
Looking at Caius, I wondered if he was thinking along the same lines as me, that one of the Cullen's was here. It made sense, considering Felix's indication towards Bella. It was something we had discussed and were expecting one, if not them all to show up here at some point.
Edward, more likely than Carlisle, would turn up once he realised that Bella was no longer in Forks. I was somewhat surprised, if it was him, that he hadn't come sooner. Just over two months had passed since I had brought Bella here, and in all that time, I had heard nothing of where Edward was.
Demetri had tracked the family, but Edward hadn't been there, much to Demetri's annoyance.
"Jane," Caius gritted out, clearly not happy at having his fun ended early. "This continues." He stated in a deadly tone before disappearing off.
Demetri suddenly stopped screaming in pain, spring up to his feet, and pulling Bella into his arms. Bella sobbed into his chest, telling him how sorry she was over and over again.
"Glad that's over," Demetri whispered into her hair.
"It shouldn't have happened in the first place. Why? Why you?" She sobbed out.
"My punishment for disrespecting him. It would have happened sooner or later." He ran his fingers through her hair, twisting the ends around a finger.
"Demetri?" I said as I walked past them. "Maybe you should take Bella to hunt? She needs to get over this human blood problem she has."
Leaving the training ground, I could still hear Bella repeatedly saying sorry to Demetri for the fact that she couldn't get her shield to work and protect him. After today's training session, I was pretty sure that Bella and her shield weren't going to be getting along anytime soon. If she couldn't unlock it when she needed to protect her mate, then what would cause her to unlock it?
It wasn't uncommon that some vampire's never got to unlock their gift. That they could spend hundreds of years and never truly be able to anything other than protecting themselves with it.
Maybe she was too young still to try and understand it, to try and master it. With everything that had gone on and her recent change, these things could be paying a massive factor in the fact that she couldn't control it.
Rounding the corner, I found Peter hovering near the throne room. Quirking an eyebrow at him in question, Peter shook his head with a smirk.
"Knew you would head this way," Peter said, moving us slowly away from the throne room. "Edward Cullen is in there."
"Figured as much," I shrugged. "You know what he's saying?"
"Something about wanting to die." Peter offered. "Aro's currently making a big show of it all. It's like his very own soap opera."
"Hm, so he's come looking for death?" I questioned, ignoring Peter's comment. "He's broken the law and now he's here looking for death? Where's Carlisle?"
"Dunno." He shrugged. "You think he thinks Bella is dead?"
"It's possible. This would be right up Edward's street with the drama. If Edward knows Bella is alive,he'll know I'm here." Fun times, I thought dryly to myself.
"Depends on if anyone has thought of her. Don't think Aro has let it slip yet, though. Think he's enjoying the drama."
"More like he's trying to figure out the best way to get Edward to join." My brow knitted together at that thought.
It was highly doubtful he would ever consider becoming part of the guard, but there was always that outside chance. If he ever was to, it would cause trouble with Demetri, who was hell bent on hunting my so called brother down.
"Demetri's taken Bella for a feed. Don't let him or Bella know just yet about Edward. I wanna speak to him first."
