Disclaimer: Supernatural owns me, not the other way around.
Warnings: Lotsa gay incest luffin' - if you didn't love it, you wouldn't still be reading!!!
Summary: Their love was an inevitable and oh-so-beautiful kind of mess [wincest drabbles
My fave of the Installment: 'Rules' - 'Cause it seems to fit my mood at the moment, lol.
A Beautiful Kind Of Mess
x.o.x.o.x
Vein
I can see the vein.
Feel it.
But everytime that razor gets close I remember Sam.
And I remember that even though he's gone-
He's gone so I can live.
x.o.x.o.x
Blurt
"I'm screwing my little brother," Dean blurted out the confession.
He didn't mean to say it, but for all this time it had been welling up inside him. He shot his eyes open, not knowing what to expect.
Sam blinked at him, squirmed alittle, and demanded, "don't stop now then," with a little odd buck to enforce his point.
x.o.x.o.x
Hug
Platonic, think platonic.
Shit, I haven't given Sam a platonic hug since he hit fourteen.
Okay, guess Dean, guess.
Hold tight, but not to tight. Light squeeze, but not to his ass.
And let go.
Whew, that wasn't so hard was it?
Let's just hope Jess doesn't notice how happy little Dean was over the reunion. Or how happy little Sammy seemed too.
Maybe the hug wasn't as platonic as I tried to make it.
x.o.x.o.x
Happy
"Would a normal life really make you happy?" Dean asked, lazily playing with his brothers hair.
Sam concidered, "not really."
"But why?" Dean asked, "all you ever talk about is leaving all this behind."
Sam shook his head, "normal lives seem great, but there's nothing normal about fucking your brother Dean - and I couldn't give you up for anything."
For a while there, Dean was entranced by that promise.
Until Sammy went and broke it.
x.o.x.o.x
Rules
"Thou shalt not fuck thou brother," Sam laughed, breath reeking of grog.
"Even the brothers with really sexy asses?" Dean asked seriously, "Oopsies," he added, before breaking into laughter too.
The preist shook his head and walked away.
"Do ya think he though we were full of shit?" Sam slurred.
"Dunno, wanna prove him wrong?" Dean offered, hands already undoing Sam's buttons.
"On a church pew?" Sam wrinkled his nose in distaste, then helped Dean with his shirt.
x.o.x.o.x
Muscle
I'm not gay, at least I don't think I am, but something about tge sleek smooth muscles expanding and contracting on Dean's arms they help hold me in place jsut turn me on so much more then Jess' smooth, submissive touches.
x.o.x.o.x
Want
I want Dean, I do - but he makes it so damn hard to want to give up this life.
I don't know what I want more; Dean or a real normal life.
It makes me so confused that I can tell i'll end up making the wrong decision for both of us and no matter which I choose.
x.o.x.o.x
Flee
Dean hated to back down from a challenge, hated to run from a dare.
For all it pissed Sam off when they were fighting an impossable demon and putting there lives so very obviously on the line, it also made it that much easier for him to trick Dean into playing games in the bad that the older boy would never try otherwise.
x.o.x.o.x
Meet
Sam couldn't look up into Dean's eyes.
He could barely even breathe.
"This is my brother, Dean," he mumbled to Jess, "Dean, this is Jess" - the girl I replaced... The girl I tried to replace you with "my girlfriend."
Sam couldn't see the look on Dean's face, wouldn't.
If he did... If he met Dean's eyes he just knew what he was would rip him apart.
x.o.x.o.x
Sore
Their first time having 's.e.x' as Sammy used to whiper it, was odd, messy and left Sam so clearly sore that Dean would not stop apolagising and demanding they never do it again.
It was Sam, for all he vividly remembered the stomach-clenching pain of the first intrusion who made Dean change his mind.
Because, yes it hurt, and yes he was sore afterwards, but still - it was one of the most beautiful nights of his life.
x.o.x.o.x
Chains
The situation was deadly, tence and all over dangerous - but even in this, the most dire of circumstances, Dean couldn't help to have a flashback to his last wet-dream with Sam in the exact same position and wearing the exact same thing.
Demon or no, Dean also couldn't help feeling the same arousal he had the first time he'd seen Sammy squirming on the floor in only those constricting chains.
After the demon was dead, Sam took one look at the lust in his brothers eyes and eagerly forgot he was kept against his will and had just been demanding his release.
x.o.x.o.x
Her
Her skin was always soft, to soft.
Her voice was always gentle, to gentle.
Her hold was always easy, to easy.
She wasn't Dean.
Her skin wasn't salty, scarred, calloused like Dean's skin.
Her voice wasn't rough, husky, cocky like Dean's voice.
Her hold wasn't demanding, promising, protective like Dean's hold.
She wasn't Dean -
And as much as that hurt, how different they were was the only thing about using Jess as his revenge, punishment, girlfriend that ever made any sence when she was gone, and Dean was back.
x.o.x.o.x
Gaze
Dean's gaze was infectious.
He would stare and stare until I found myself staring back.
Whether or not he knew I could see the love, lust and promises in his eyes or not, he knew my face would always turn bright pink and I would be up for anything that night.
Damn Dean for being so damn alluring one gaze could seduce my entire soul.
x.o.x.o.x
Watch
Sam would always watch Dean. Even before there first kiss, Sam was always watching Dean.
Idolising him or not, he never seemed to look close enough to notice back then, for a long time - longer then Dean was proud of - his big brother was always watching back.
x.o.x.o.x
Imperfect
Dean gets angry to easily, horny to easily and he makes it easy to tell either. he sins, he lies and he only sweet-talks me when he thinks im asleep.
He's imperfect, and I have to say I wouldn't love him any other way.
x.o.x.o.x
Flawed
Sammy gets to emotional to quickly, gets reckless to often and he makes it clear to tell both. He's a sinner, a liar and he only cries when he thinks I can't hear.
He's flawed, and I don't think I could love him any other way.
x.o.x.o.x
