Chapter 15: A Case For Dr. Head
≈O≈
The cozy room was decorated with care to be as welcoming and soothing as possible. Even the chair Kim sat in should have felt like a warm embrace. Yet she might as well have been trapped in a dark lair strapped to a deathtrap; that's how uneasy she was.
"I'm happy to have you back, Kimberly." The therapist smiled warmly at Kim. Dr. Casey Head was in her early forties, and looked very professional in her navy blue skirt and jacket, along with some dressy black flats. Her ensemble was contrasted by a pleasant, friendly face with a pair of warm brown eyes framed with dark, mid-length hair. A notepad with a couple flipped leaves rested on her crossed legs.
"That makes one of us," Kim said wryly.
"I sense you're still apprehensive of our sessions."
"You're not wrong."
"You needn't be afraid or nervous. I'm here to help you, on your terms."
From the fixed point on the wall she had been focusing on up to now, Kim now let her eyes wander over the various wall decorations.
"So what compelled you to resume treatment?" Dr. Head asked.
Avoiding the question, Kim got up and went to the various diplomas and certificates that had caught her attention.
"Did Ron persuade you again?"
"No," Kim said, still eyeing the wall.
"Your parents?"
"No." Kim turned her head slightly towards the therapist. "It was my… my girlfriend."
"Girlfriend?" Dr. Head perked up. "That's new."
Kim turned back to the wall and pointed out a certificate she hadn't noticed during her previous sessions. "Global Justice. What's that about?"
"Basically it just means they have approved me as an official therapist for their field personnel. Which is also why I'm uniquely suited to help you."
"You really think you can help me?"
"I know I can, if you just give me a chance."
A few moments went by as Kim fought her urge to just walk away. Eventually she won her internal struggle and returned to the chair. "Okay Doc," she said and flopped down. "Where do we begin?"
"Let's start with something simple. Like how are things at home?"
"Not as simple as you might think."
≈O≈
To her annoyance, Bonnie couldn't take her mind of a certain redhead, even as she browsed the feminine hygiene product shelf at the supermarket. All she could think of now was the mental image of Kim laid out on a couch like so many sitcom characters, being mentally probed while Bonnie herself was shopping. All Bonnie could do was hope that the therapy would help Kim. Part of her still wanted to be selfish about it, to just get Kim to stop waking up swinging, but the fact was Bonnie wanted nothing more than for Kim to get better, get healthy, and find the peace she so deserved.
"Excuse me," a voice interrupted Bonnie's thoughts.
Bonnie looked over to see Mr. Possible standing next to her, reaching for items in front of her.
"Uh, Mr. P, you do realize you're going for tampons?"
"I sure do, Bonnie. That's Kimmie's brand."
Bonnie looked at him really quizzically.
"It's not for me. Just getting some for the gals."
"Wait," Bonnie waved her hand around, as if trying to disperse clouds of confusion, "you buy tampons for Kim and your wife?"
"Well, not always. But you know them, they're very busy with work and saving the world, so sometimes they forget the essentials. That's where I step in."
The nonchalance with which Mr. Possible treated the chore most men would do almost anything to avoid baffled Bonnie. "And you don't mind?" she asked, unable to mask her incredulousness.
"Not at all. I love my girls, and as a husband and father you sometimes have to venture out of your comfort zone."
"You're actually pretty cool, for a fuddy-duddy."
"Ten-four, good buddy."
"I take it back." Bonnie hesitated for a bit. "Do you think we could talk about something?"
"Sure. I actually want to talk to you, too."
After checking out the two ended on the tables set up outside the store.
"So, uh, do you know about Kim's little, uh", Bonnie glanced around and leaned in closer and lowered her voice, "freakouts?"
"Well, we like to refer to them as episodes."
Episodes? Bonnie bristled at thought of Kim's own father trivializing the issue. "And I like to refer to people I date as sane, but I guess we can't all get what we want, can we?" she said angrily and crossed her arms.
Mr. Possible watched Bonnie's eyes sparkle with growing anger. This was a conversation he had been dreading for a long time - luckily he wasn't having it with a social worker as he had feared. He put his elbows on the table, crossing his hands.
"You want to know why we let Kimmie fight super villains even knowing what it's doing to her?"
"For starters."
"Kimmie's always been a handful. She's always had to find new challenges, up her game, so to speak. And when she doesn't feel challenged or get to discharge that energy somehow, she gets… antsy."
"Antsy? You let Kim get traumatized because she gets 'antsy'?"
"Manic would be another word. One time she drove her bike for hours around town trying to find the bullies who stole some kid's candy. Even a broken chain didn't stop her." Mr. Possible sighed. "When she started the babysitting thing it seemed to calm her down."
"She was probably laying down the law for more than just the neighborhood kids."
"That was exactly what we found out, and when we did, of course we put an end to it. But she had gotten a taste of the big leagues, and nothing short of that was going to do anymore. Sure, we tried our best to reign her in. We even hired help to look after her when we couldn't, but no one stayed on for more than a few days." Mr. Possible stroked his chin and said thoughtfully: "I think Dr. Head treated some of them."
"Couldn't you, like, come up with something for her to do, burn her energy on?"
"Sure. We signed her up for every activity we could think of, including those sixteen martial arts classes she's so fond of mentioning. Though they weren't all kung-fu; I think she just says so because it sounds cooler."
"I'll give her that. So what made you finally let her do her thing?"
"We realized we, and our pocketbook, just couldn't handle her. But the deciding thing was that whenever she managed to sneak a 'mission' past us, she always seemed happier. Helping people, actually saving them made her happy. And then she met Wade, who could equip her with more than just her wits and a short skirt."
"Don't knock the skirt. It's gotten me out of a lot of sticky situations."
"And into some, I bet."
An involuntary burst of laughter escaped before Bonnie caught herself, yet unable to keep down that final snort. For a moment after she had regained control of herself she mused in silence. Having had first hand experience with Kim's, well, Kimness, Bonnie felt she understood the Possibles' decision, and more than that, could accept it.
"What was your thing?" Bonnie asked.
"Sorry?"
"You said you wanted to talk to me, too. What about?"
"It doesn't matter, I already got what I needed."
"Come on, I got to drill you for answers, now it's your turn."
Mr. Possible ignored the unfortunate phrasing. "I just wanted to know if you were serious about Kim. Now I know."
Bonnie was confused. She understood the whole protective dad thing, but this seemed just a bit too involved. It was just dating. "Why does it matter?" she asked.
"Remember our talk, the one we had the day we found out about you two?"
Bonnie was still a little embarrassed to have been caught like that. She looked away. "Sure."
"And you remember what Kim said was her number one concern about your relationship?"
"She was worried some dumbasses wouldn't let her help them," Bonnie said fighting the urge to go on a fervent rant.
"Exactly. And I can't just let her risk the one thing that makes her happy over a… fling."
For just a moment, Bonnie bristled over Mr. Possible's words. Then she considered the implications of those words - of her relationship with Kim. What if Kim really had to stop saving the world because of it? What if they broke up, would it be all for nothing? Would it be Bonnie's fault Kim's reputation was ruined?
Mr. Possible saw the conflict on Bonnie's face and stepped in to derail that train of thought. "Bonnie: whatever happens with Kim is not your fault. You two clearly care about each other, and that is all that matters, regardless of the result. All I ask that you're honest with her - and yourself."
That was a lot to ask of Bonnie. Maybe too much.
≈O≈
"Tell me about your missions."
"What's to tell. Me and Ron crash a super villain's lair, bust their plans, and ace the place. Sometimes with a delightful self destruct for dessert."
"I understand it can get pretty dangerous at times."
"With mad scientists waving around death rays like toys and kung-fu fighting henchmen blasting us with superheated plasma, you do the math."
"Have you or Ron ever been injured on these missions?"
"We get our share of scrapes and bruises."
"Anything more serious than that?"
"We've been lucky."
"Are you worried that might change?"
Kim's silence prompted Dr. Head to probe more. "Kimberly? Are you worried you or Ron might get seriously injured?"
"No. I mean, yes, but-"
"You're worried about something else? Someone else?"
"I've stopped a lot of bad guys. So far they've been following the playbook, but what if one of them decides to go off-script and come at me? Come at someone I care about?"
"Like your girlfriend?"
"I'm the one out there taking on the bad guys. Not them. Not Bonnie," Kim said heatedly. Her gaze dropped and her voice softened. "I just couldn't live with myself if one of my enemies attacked her, if she got hurt because of me."
"These bad guys you fight: if you weren't around, would they still be out there doing bad stuff?"
"I guess. It's not like I put them up to it."
"So whatever bad they might do to people you know and care about, they would still hurt a lot more people others care for if you weren't fighting them."
"It's not like it's all up to me. There's still Global Justice."
"Yes, they do what they can, but they can't be everywhere or help everyone. Neither can you."
"You sound like my mother."
Dr. Head just smiled. "You're not forcing anyone to be with you. And by all accounts everyone seems to be aware of what you do."
"I guess."
"So how is it your fault if any of them got hurt?"
Regardless of how hard she tried - and she tried pretty hard - Kim couldn't come up with anything, at least not something she could put into words.
≈O≈
"And how are people taking your relationship with Bonnie?"
"Is this really relevant? I'm here because of my PTSD, not my recent foray into LGBT."
"Is that how you see it; a foray?"
Kim rested her head on her hand, the fingers spread evenly against her temple. She cast an annoyed look at the shrink. "Are you gonna hang on to my every word?"
"That is my job."
Kim stayed silent for a while. Dr. Head observed her without saying a word. When the silence grew too oppressive, Kim broke it.
"I don't know what it is. All I know is I fell in love with a girl."
"Does it bother you?"
"What? Being with a girl?"
"It can be quite jarring to have your sexual identity redefined so suddenly. Even though we never really stop developing sexually, orientation is one of the first things we form. Granted, dealing with these issues is a bit easier with the current attitude being more open than it once was."
"I never really had a problem with myself. I mean, yeah, I was... surprised when it happened, but that wasn't what scared me."
"What was?"
Kim felt like she had just had this conversation with her mother. "Other people and how it affected me helping them."
"Which brings me back to my original question: How are others taking it?"
"People have been pretty cool about it. To my face, at least. Usually they're not critical of me dating a girl, but that the girl is Bonnie."
≈O≈
"Girl, I really don't get you."
"What do you mean?"
Monique watched Kim take a slurp of her smoothie while at the same time doing her homework and working on the yearbook layout.
"You're packing some serious work ethic, with being involved in almost every club in the school and just for kicks you traipse around the world helping people."
Kim glanced up from her equations. "And?"
"And of all the people you date Queen Meanie."
"She's not that bad once you get to know her."
Monique arched an eyebrow. "Really? So all those arguments I've seen you two have are just misunderstandings?"
"I know we can get a little... heated, but that's just because we're so alike," Kim said. She saw a protest coming and jumped in front of it. "It doesn't really matter, anyway. I didn't choose Bonnie. I just... fell in love."
"Is she your first girlfriend?"
"Yes. But I've dated some boys before."
"Ron?"
Kim sighed in frustration. "I've had this conversation so many times; I don't get why it's so hard for people to understand that we are not and have never been romantically involved. Ron's family, and around these parts you don't date family."
"Gotcha."
≈O≈
"So your relationship with Bonnie is rather… volatile?"
"Explosive is the word I'd use. One minute we're ready to kill each other, and the next we're…"
Kim blushed.
≈O≈
"Get it together, K! It's like you have two left feet."
"I'm not the one missing the mark trying to work those chicken legs, B."
Kim reeled from the slap. With a furious growl, she lunged at Bonnie knocking them both off their feet...
...dropping in a tangled mess of writhing limbs, the bed springs complained under the sudden addition of weight. Every protrusion in the room became a clothes rack as the cheerleaders rid themselves of everything covering even the slightest bit of skin, sending it flying in every direction with careless abandon.
≈O≈
"You two are sexually active?"
Kim squirmed.
"Anything you say here is confidential. I'm not going to go 'telling mom' about any of this."
"I know, it's just… I'm not used to talking about that stuff."
"It's okay, just take your time."
Kim wrung her hands, trying to calm herself down, to force the words out of her mouth. When she finally felt like she could talk about it, she did so quietly.
"Bonnie and I… have sex," she said. As the dreaded 'S' word left her lips, she felt slightly emboldened. "Since that first time a couple weeks ago, we've been pretty… active."
"Do your parents know?"
"Yeah. Mom even gave us the safe sex talk."
"That must have been uncomfortable."
"Ferociously."
≈O≈
"Come on, Kimmie, pick yourself up."
Kim spoke from under her hands covering her desked head. "This is so humiliating."
"Let's just get this over with," Bonnie huffed, arms crossed.
"I wish you girls took this more seriously. You can't get each other pregnant, but it's not the only reason to practice safe sex."
"Look, Mrs. P, we haven't done it with anyone else, so I don't think we have to worry about diseases."
"Really?" Mrs. Possible said skeptically, looking intently at Bonnie. "Not once?"
It didn't take long for Bonnie to break under the stare. "Okay, there was that one time. But we used a condom."
"That's good to hear. Still, there's no reason you shouldn't educate yourselves. There are these things called 'dental dams'-"
"Oh, God, just kill me now," Kim moaned.
≈O≈
Dr. Head smiled. "So things are good otherwise with you and Bonnie? Despite your episodes?"
"I, uh… We're good, now, but…"
"But?"
"Something happened and… Well, she told me I had to come here if I wanted keep being with her."
"Did you hurt her?"
Silence.
"Kim?"
"No. I came really close, but even that was more than ever should have happened."
"Does she blame you for what happened?"
Kim didn't say anything.
"Do you blame yourself for what happened?"
"It's really hard not to, but I'm trying. I'm…"
"Do you think there was anything you could have done to prevent it?"
"I don't know, maybe."
"Such as?"
"I don't know!" Kim screamed. "But I almost hit Bonnie in the face! I could have really hurt her. I love her, and I made her afraid of me. Now I'm afraid that it'll happen again, and this time I might not snap out of it in time. That is what I know."
The shrink watched her, smiling gently. "You know what that means?"
"What?" Kim snapped.
"That you're motivated. And that's good; it means we have a real chance at achieving results."
Kim slumped in her seat. "So now what?"
"Now we stop. We're done for today. Next time, we're gonna get to work."
≈O≈
Bonnie was waiting outside when Kim left therapy. Happily surprised, Kim rushed over and hugged the brunette.
"What are you doing here? I would have called," Kim asked as the two separated.
"I know, I just wanted to see you."
There was something in the other girl's smile Kim couldn't quite put a finger on. Whatever it was, it could wait. She just put her hand in Bonnie's and started walking along the street.
"How was it?" Bonnie asked.
"Exhausting."
"Wanna talk about it?"
"I'm all talked out. All I want to do is switch off for a bit."
"We could go to Tara's and watch a dumb movie."
Kim raised their intertwined hands and pressed them against her chest with her free hand. "Spankin'."
"If you insist," Bonnie said, her suggestive tone bordering on cheesy.
Kim chuckled.
≈O≈
The two couples sat on the Williams' couch, their attentions being competed over by the movie on tv and their partners. Not surprisingly, all of them had long ago lost track of the movie.
Tara's parents were at the Possible house, leaving the teens unsupervised in an empty house.
Kim groaned at the beep of her Kimmunicator. Wade had remote controlled it to come to his workshop so he could do some upgrades on it. Kim hadn't even noticed it returning.
"What's the sitch, Wade?" Kim said, setting down the device on the coffee table so she could lean back on the couch.
"Okay, so this panic button we talked about: it's ready for action," the tech kid informed her via the small screen.
"So am I," Bonnie whispered in Kim's ear and nipped the lobe.
Kim tried pushing her away. "So how does it work?"
"First of all there's the physical button, recessed flush with the casing to avoid any accidental alerts."
Bonnie continued to kiss Kim's neck.
"Kim, can you ask her to stop doing that? It's very distracting," Wade said awkwardly.
"Sweetie, get off."
Grinning, Bonnie stopped but stayed in close.
"Thank you," Wade sighed in relief. "Okay, so in case you are unable to actually press the button, there's also a secondary trigger, which monitors your vital signs. Increased heart rate, respiration, perspiration, that kind of stuff."
"Ready for action is right," Bonnie said and looked at Kim, incredulous of what she had just heard. "Is he for real?"
"Wade, do you know what else causes those symptoms? The very thing that prompted the panic button in the first place."
Wade flustered. "I didn't realize – I'm disabling it right now."
"I want it taken out completely."
"It's just a software patch."
"So you're saying you've been able to monitor my vitals all along?"
"Of course."
"Wade, honey – I know you mean well, but you've got to start telling me about this stuff."
"It was never an issue before."
"Well, I haven't been in intimate relationship before. Okay, just promise you won't look at my vitals unless you know for certain I'm on a mission."
"Scout's honor."
"Let's test that, shall we," Bonnie said, her hand wandering somewhere out of sight.
"What do you-" Kim began, before suddenly she gasped and let out a stifled moan.
"Kim, you just spiked," Wade said, his eyes looking somewhere off-screen.
"Bonnie!" Kim admonished.
"So much for Scout's Honor," Bonnie grinned.
"Hey, I didn't have a chance to deactivate the sensors!" Wade exclaimed, just starting to realize what happened.
"Get it done, Wade," Kim said curtly and ended the call. "I can't believe you just did that," she said to Bonnie.
"You know you liked it."
Kim pounced on Bonnie and pinned her on her back. "Maybe I'll take you up on that spanking. I do insist."
"Kim? You do know we have company?"
Kim looked up and saw Ron and Tara staring at them. Her face turned deep crimson.
To be continued...
